SCP Foundation - Creepypasta with roid rage - now ITT: SCP fans

[ABE LINN COHN]

Why does every single nu-SCP have to have that dumb banner with bright colors? What was wrong with just having "Object Class: Keter"?
Not only that, why do half of them have a completely different header, no sidebar, random background colors, and overall a complete mess of format inconsistencies?

 

[Valstrax]

Why does every single nu-SCP have to have that dumb banner with bright colors? What was wrong with just having "Object Class: Keter"?
Not only that, why do half of them have a completely different header, no sidebar, random background colors, and overall a complete mess of format inconsistencies?

I dunno, but it's dumb that I now have to look through a bajillion labels when the Safe-Euclid-Keter system was perfectly fine.

 

[Procrastinhater]

Description: SCP-324468 is a memetic agent developed by the Foundation to act as a disinformation campaign in the event of a Broken Masquerade incident. It encourages hosts, referred to as SCP-324468-1 instances, to write articles and stories about a secret global organization that contains and studies anomalous entities known as the Foundation.

All instances of SCP-324468-1 will have an account set up on SCP-324468-2, a wikidot housing all documents produced by SCP-324468-1 instances, immediately upon viewing SCP-324468.

Articles produced by SCP-324468-1 are not anomalous and do not spread SCP-324468. However, staff that have read the articles note that they tend to be of a poor quality, often descending into long running narratives full of self-insert characters, early 21st century American left-wing political rants, and would be insufficient to provide staff with enough information to contain actual SCPs.

That's unironically better than anything that's been written on that cancerous wiki for fucking years at this point.
Right on the money too.
As for newer ones that I like, not exactly new, but Red Reality (can't even remember the number, 3001 I think) was the last really good one I read personally.
The guy being trapped in a null void between dimensions and slowly disintegrating was creepy, but it was the idea of a persons mind turning on itself in complete isolation and sensory deprivation that really gave me chills.
The idea that after a certain point even if he got out he wouldn't be him anymore. Sensory deprivation is used as a torture devise for a reason.
It gave me the same feeling as Stephen Kings short story The Jaunt.
It's a long time in there, when there's no time.
After a while you'd probably welcome the Hounds of Tindalos sniffing you out.

 

[Neodymium-60]

If anyone wants another example of the sorry state of the SCP wiki, check out SCP-7056.

... what?

 

[VargReallyDidNothingWrong]

OK so i'm back to bitch about this:

OK, fair enough, Safe, Euclid Keter, Neutralized I can get behind because these are terms we've been using for 10+ years at this point. Retconning them out of existence would make no sense. What the fuck is Esoteric?

Now we're getting into the bullshit. Apollyon is just "TurboKeter". It literally only exists because of power creep. Keter isn't enough anymore because everything is Keter and we need a new term for shit that's TOTALLY GONNA END THE WORLD U GUISE.

Archon is "we actively decided not to contain it", which I guess does need it's own separate rating.

Really the existence of all these secondary classes simply proves that the original system was unscientific and badly thought out.
What the fuck Tiamat, Cernunnos, Hiemal, Ticonderoga are I have no idea. There's a list of like 200 "secondary classes" with subclasses that I have no fucking intention of reading or giving a shit about. This is some of the gayest fucking crap I have ever seen.

Moving on, we have the new Disruption and Risk classes. For some reason they gave the Risk class completely fucking logical names and levels in goddamn English, but then Disruption class is some gay fucking word salad bullshit (I realize it's all words that have to do with fire, Vlam is flame in Dutch or whatever, Keneq is fire in some Eskimo dialect, whatever). Why is there no goddamn consistency with this shit??

 

[Monuklear]

Apollyon is just "TurboKeter". It literally only exists because of power creep. Keter isn't enough anymore because everything is Keter and we need a new term for shit that's TOTALLY GONNA END THE WORLD U GUISE.

A good chunk of these secondary/fanon classes are exactly that. "Keter, but moreso". And more than half of them are just variations of "uncontained, because reasons", "it's something meta to do with the Foundation itself" or "it helps us contain something else".

I remember when the 2000 series was opened up we got a bunch of Thaumiel-class SCPs. I think Thaumiel specifically is the only one outside of the Safe/Euclid/Keter trio that's worth keeping, but only as long as it remains a very rare designation reserved for maybe a handful of actually special entities (like the original SCP-2000).
But that's not how things went. Not only that Thaumiel was overused to the point of absurdity, a lot of retards began thinking "if SCP-2000 can make up an entirely new object class, why can't I?", and that's how we got Archon, and then Apollyon, and then it was the 4000 series and nu-SCP was in full effect. Now we have an SCP class for every single letter in the LGBTQAIDS+ alphabet soup.

I wouldn't even mind it too much if the new classes were actually useful, or if the autism on display here was good autism that made up a plausible pseudo-scientific system. But, as stated above, 80+% of these classes are completely superfluous and only exist to stroke the author's ego.

 

[Imperial Citizen]

One of the things that works with SCPs as a piece of horror writing is that object class and special containment procedures are placed first before the description. The reader learns how threatening the object is before you even know what it is.

The one off object classes can be useful as a twist. I think it was SCP-2317 that first had Apollyon. That worked because you thought it was Keter in the first version while at the end you realize that nothing can stop SCP-2317.

The disruption and risk classes would be useful for a researcher to understand an SCP at a glance. Containment is how well the Foundation can hold the object, Disruption is how dangerous the object is to consensus reality. Risk is the severity that the object has to an individual.

At first I though these extra classes would ruin the suspense, but they could work.

For example, you have fork that is a keter object. That means it can break containment easily. But you don’t know how dangerous the object is. Could be that it compels people to use it and the Foundation keeps storing it near the cafeteria. Or it generates dimensional rifts in which demons pour out of every few days.

If I say it’s a fork that is keter, dark, critical, that narrows down the options but still leaves you wondering what exactly does the object do.

The problem is that it is too much for the causal reader to understand. Keeping it short and simple invites the imagination better than more detail can, at least for horror.

Also, did anyone get the meaning behind the name SCP-324468? Hint: look up a phone number pad.

 

[ABE LINN COHN]

The one off object classes can be useful as a twist. I think it was SCP-2317 that first had Apollyon. That worked because you thought it was Keter in the first version while at the end you realize that nothing can stop SCP-2317.

It also helped that it was supposed to be a special classification only O5 knew about, hence why it only appeared after "entering O5 credentials." The horror comes from the idea that O5 know about these all-powerful entities and keep their true nature a secret. If they keep this potentially apocalyptic being hidden from even level 5s, what else are they hiding?
Of course this all goes out the fucking window when every article wants to be the special snowflake "ZOMG O5 ACCESS SOOO SCARY" SCP.

 

[VargReallyDidNothingWrong]

Bloody Hell, the constant trooning out of the SCP Wiki is getting ludicrous.

The Greek Goddess "Aphrodite" is an Trans MAN now

SCP-7454 - SCP Foundation

The SCP Foundation's 'top-secret' archives, declassified for your enjoyment.

scp-wiki.wikidot.com

The author is a tranny and this SCP is their literal tranny janny faggot bullshit fanfiction.

 

[Valstrax]

View attachment 4888470
The author is a tranny and this SCP is their literal tranny janny faggot bullshit fanfiction.

>*genuinely happy, clapping*

Say it with me, boys! FAGGOT.

 

[AnOminous]

At the end of the day, Harry here is just one out of the many bottom-feeders that occupy the SCP wiki's rotting corpse like a bunch of maggots. He is unfortunately not the exception, but the rule.

He sounds like an even more retarded version of Dr. Bright.

 

[The Demon Pimp of Razgriz]

OK so i'm back to bitch about this:

View attachment 4883440

OK, fair enough, Safe, Euclid Keter, Neutralized I can get behind because these are terms we've been using for 10+ years at this point. Retconning them out of existence would make no sense. What the fuck is Esoteric?

View attachment 4883444

Now we're getting into the bullshit. Apollyon is just "TurboKeter". It literally only exists because of power creep. Keter isn't enough anymore because everything is Keter and we need a new term for shit that's TOTALLY GONNA END THE WORLD U GUISE.

Archon is "we actively decided not to contain it", which I guess does need it's own separate rating.

Really the existence of all these secondary classes simply proves that the original system was unscientific and badly thought out.
What the fuck Tiamat, Cernunnos, Hiemal, Ticonderoga are I have no idea. There's a list of like 200 "secondary classes" with subclasses that I have no fucking intention of reading or giving a shit about. This is some of the gayest fucking crap I have ever seen.
View attachment 4883468

Moving on, we have the new Disruption and Risk classes. For some reason they gave the Risk class completely fucking logical names and levels in goddamn English, but then Disruption class is some gay fucking word salad bullshit (I realize it's all words that have to do with fire, Vlam is flame in Dutch or whatever, Keneq is fire in some Eskimo dialect, whatever). Why is there no goddamn consistency with this shit??
View attachment 4883448View attachment 4883452

Stuff like this makes me appreciate the RPC Authority's relatively simple and utilitarian system.

 

[draggs]

SCP-7454 suffers from a number of disorders such as depression, substance abuse, bipolar disorder, and gender dysphoria. It is currently presumed that the majority of these issues are a result of the established identity and worship of 'Aphrodite' clashing directly with SCP-7454's preferred identity, appearance, and gender.

how stupid

 

[Grinrow2]

Archon is "we actively decided not to contain it", which I guess does need it's own separate rating.

That goes against the whole point of the organisation even if it was classed as safe why would they risk it?

 

[The Demon Pimp of Razgriz]

That goes against the whole point of the organisation even if it was classed as safe why would they risk it?

Its probably used for things that are more beneficial if left uncontained than if they tried to contain it, like that space girl who predicts disasters and calls the Sun her brother.

 

[brocktherock]

You know when you repeat at a word for too long, it stops sounding like a word? I'm getting that but with these SCP logos, they are peak "graphic design is my passion".

Moving on, we have the new Disruption and Risk classes. For some reason they gave the Risk class completely fucking logical names and levels in goddamn English, but then Disruption class is some gay fucking word salad bullshit (I realize it's all words that have to do with fire, Vlam is flame in Dutch or whatever, Keneq is fire in some Eskimo dialect, whatever). Why is there no goddamn consistency with this shit??

Like both of these just merge into rounded shapes and colours to me. They're terrible at classification. If I picked up a bottle and these icons can't tell me what sort of SCP the bottle contains at first glance, then they failed. What do flaming eyes have to do with 'disruption'? Just how autistic do you have to be to think overlapping circles is a great way to tell people how dangerous something is when we live in a world already surrounded by fucking triangular/diamond shaped warning symbols? It looks more like it's telling me the memetic risk. Or it's a bunch of Pringles.

 

[Gar For Archer]

Thaumiel shouldn’t be a containment class in the first place, whether or not an anomaly is beneficial to the Foundation isn’t particularly relevant to how difficult it is to contain.

Not counting Neutralized, I think you really only need 4 primary containment classes per the locked-box test.

1. Safe - No risk of breach. Object does not display anomalous properties unless interacted with, or its anomalous properties are easily mitigated with a static containment scheme (e.g. a fancy box). Containment requires no maintenance, upkeep or resource expenditure. Common examples include simple anomalous objects and small anomalous locations that can be contained simply by locking them up.

2. Euclid - Low risk of breach. Containment requires a regular schedule of basic maintenance, upkeep or resource/energy expenditure. Common examples include non-hostile sapient/sentient anomalies, anomalous objects whose abilities need to be actively suppressed, and anomalous locations that need to be regularly guarded/patrolled.

3. Keter - High risk of breach. Examples include but are not limited to: sapient/sentient anomalies that are actively hostile to containment; anomalies with unpredictable behavior necessitating constantly adapting containment procedures; anomalies with expensive or complex containment procedures; and anomalous locations that require active containment measures to prevent the expansion of their boundaries.

4. Lethe-α/β - The anomaly is left deliberately uncontained (beta), or is currently uncontainable given the knowledge and resources available to the Foundation (alpha). Containment efforts are focused solely on information suppression and post-incident coverups. Examples include but are not limited to: anomalous phenomena whose cause and behavior is not yet fully understood; anomalies whose containment would yield a greater breach of normalcy than the anomaly itself; anomalies that would be excessively difficult or expensive to contain relative to its threat to normalcy; or anomalies in remote locations with low risk of discovery.

Probably like 90% of the nu-containment classes can be bundled under a general “uncontained, but there’s a reason why” class.

 

[Monuklear]

4. Lethe-α/β - The anomaly is left deliberately uncontained (beta), or is currently uncontainable given the knowledge and resources available to the Foundation (alpha). Containment efforts are focused solely on information suppression and post-incident coverups. Examples include but are not limited to: anomalous phenomena whose cause and behavior is not yet fully understood; anomalies whose containment would yield a greater breach of normalcy than the anomaly itself; anomalies that would be excessively difficult or expensive to contain relative to its threat to normalcy; or anomalies in remote locations with low risk of discovery.

That actually sounds great. If the SCP wiki would ever clean up its act (right around the Second Coming, I reckon), they should adopt something like this to Finally give a Solution to the Containment Classes Question.

 

[Commander X]

The SCP has accreted too much lore, all of these fussy new rules and details feel like it's supposed to appeal to the sort of people who cannot just enjoy anything, there has to be "lore" and "worldbuilding" with what feels like a wiki entry for every little detail. No more real mystery. Too many people want to make an EPIC entry like SCP-093 and such but shove a bunch of useless details into them and in too many cases "wacky" humor that sometimes verges into "teh Penguin of DOOM!!!!" territory.

Look how fast something like this happened the Backrooms concept, after not too long there's levels and levels with water and other items laying about like pick-up items in a video game and creatures being catalogued like Pokémon.

 

[Monuklear]

after not too long there's levels and levels with water and other items laying about like pick-up items in a video game

The single most cringe thing about the Backrooms is how it's obviously invented by and for teenagers with a gaming addiction.
I tried reading through their wiki, but I just couldn't take the concept seriously when 95% of its thematic language is just video game concepts. Like all the "X ending" videos that YouTube decided to dump on me sometime in early 2022 for no apparent reason.