Shane Edward Nokes / @NorrathReaver / Daddy Cum Cannon - Internet Tough Guy and “Retired Cybersecurity Expert” who worked with the US Secret Service and FBI – In reality, a perpetually unemployed leech on disability benefits who threatens people on the internet all day. Raped with a butterknife.

[easy]

@easy inspired me so I had to take another crack at drawing Shame.

View attachment 4986066

my god, it's beautiful. the teeth, the triple chin, the hairline so far back it's in another timezone. perfection.

 

[Anonymus Fluhre]

Shane Nokes is a pedophile, we all know this.

But more importantly I think we need to make him acknowledge why he got fired from MS.

I guarantee it’s because he was trying to throw around his “credentials” and somebody called him out to corporate about it. A mall kiosk jockey pretending to be some elite M$ hacker would be terminated pretty quickly.

Again, he never worked directly for Microsoft. He worked for a third party call center.

 

[Friendly Arbys Employee]

Again, he never worked directly for Microsoft. He worked for a third party call center.

Are you kidding?
"Microshane Nokes" used to work for the secret service at Microsoft, so it's probably hard to find much of a record...
But I did find this article from around 2012, wherein Shane is THE AUTHORITATIVE SOURCE on whether internal XBOX documents leaked were legit.

https://www.windowscentral.com/microsofts-xbox-720-roadmap-through-2015-leaked-online

Here is his legendary 0-interaction tweet from 2012:

Just... be more careful trying to deny the Nokes legacy. You can't afford to fight Microsoft's lawyers. He's an alumni in good standing.

 

[A Sunset]

Are you kidding?
"Microshane Nokes" used to work for the secret service at Microsoft, so it's probably hard to find much of a record...
But I did find this article from around 2012, wherein Shane is THE AUTHORITATIVE SOURCE on whether internal XBOX documents leaked were legit.

https://www.windowscentral.com/microsofts-xbox-720-roadmap-through-2015-leaked-online

View attachment 4986717


Here is his legendary 0-interaction tweet from 2012:

View attachment 4986788

Just... be more careful trying to deny the Nokes legacy. You can't afford to fight Microsoft's lawyers. He's an alumni in good standing.

It warms the cockles of my heart to know that you can look up a tweet made by Shane Nokes, whether a decade ago or a minute ago, and it will ALWAYS have zero engagement or likes. People really don’t like Shame, or care about what he has to say.

 

[Not a bee]

We’ve discussed Shane’s obesity and pedophilia in great detail, but there’s something we’ve been shamefully neglecting - his balding.

View attachment 4984508
This picture was featured early in the thread, and yes Shame looks like a stinky autist retard with a huge bulging gut, short stubby legs, and surely no ass whatsoever. We’re talking Hank-Hill levels of no ass here. However, if we zoom in - ENHANCE:

View attachment 4984520
Oopsie doodles - we‘ve found a large bald spot on the very top of his head. Shame’s hair will surely begin falling out at an exponetial rate. He will look like a Benedictine monk.

View attachment 4984528

Wait, let me fix that.

View attachment 4984620

Also, here’s a new PNG for da memes with Shame’s meth-teeth.

View attachment 4984628

Jesus Christ he looks like a literal molerat

 

[internet friend]

Microsoftie is the perfect description for Shane, and I'm not talking about his career

 

[LobsterBoy669]

"Microsoftie." Great way to describe Shane's dick.

 

[Friendly Arbys Employee]

Shame (aka DewThePDX),

I am concerned about your mental health.
I know after your literal decades working for both Microsoft and The Government, you must be used to people treating you with a well-earned respect.
It must be nuts having such a background, attracting multiple people trying to steal your identity every single month, just for the taste of that raw Nokes power and authority.

It must suck since you retired and now spend your life on this "cesspool" you called social media: hunting the big bad guys, yelling at random Christians, threatening people over star trek lore...

We can't be making things easier on you.

How many times have you had to watch Willy Wonka over the last week?

What do you get when you guzzle down sweets?
You eat as much as an elephant eats?
What are you at, getting terribly fat
What do you think about that?

I don't like the look of it.

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

I think he had a falling out with Wil Wheaton, and had to stalk his wife for a while.

View attachment 4985206

This endeavor to remind Wil indirectly (blocked?) that his birthday is May 19, and he has been missing Wil since 2018 (this tweet is from 2022) tragicially did not come to fruition.
There was to be no birthday bash of "the boys" (Wesley Crusher, Bill Gates, Shane Nokes, Master Chief) in 2022..... maybe 2023 is the year the gang gets back together?

holy shit this tweet is my goodness what even is it

it's like creepy uncle, hello fellow kids, father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate, all in one.

i am again agog

fatrik best call in five swats and a tactical nuke because shane is rapidly gaining and even quasidebt won't get fatrick caught back up this shit is gold, gem, everything

 

[internet friend]

No wonder Willy Wonka is such a relatable favourite of his

It's like looking in a mirror for him

 

[A Sunset]

Shame (aka DewThePDX),

I am concerned about your mental health.
I know after your literal decades working for both Microsoft and The Government, you must be used to people treating you with a well-earned respect.
It must be nuts having such a background, attracting multiple people trying to steal your identity every single month, just for the taste of that raw Nokes power and authority.

View attachment 4987812

It must suck since you retired and now spend your life on this "cesspool" you called social media: hunting the big bad guys, yelling at random Christians, threatening people over star trek lore...

We can't be making things easier on you.

How many times have you had to watch Willy Wonka over the last week?

View attachment 4987696

What do you get when you guzzle down sweets?
You eat as much as an elephant eats?
What are you at, getting terribly fat
What do you think about that?

I don't like the look of it.

So much quality content here.

The shit he makes up is so outrageous. This guy is Jason Bourne - multiple hostile agents are trying to track him and hack his accounts at all times, due to his status as a “known quantity”. I think you really impressed this stranger online, Shame.

It also really amuses me that he says social media is like a “rotting salmon ready to explode ”. Like, why salmon specifically? It’s a bizarre choice. No one has ever said that.

Also - he’s watched Willy Wonka 2000 fucking times? 2,000? That is insane, though probably a lie like everything else. And of course, his most-watched movie is all about grooming children and eating chocolate until you swell like a balloon.

​

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

It also really amuses me that he says social media is like a “rotting salmon ready to explode ”. Like, why salmon specifically? It’s a bizarre choice. No one has ever said that.

apparently a search finds stuff about zombie salmon and how they spawn or something, so he must have heard it somewhere as a funfact and it stuck with him

midwits like him are very easy to influence

 

[Blewberry Nausea]

Why do lolcows do it? The simplest truth is if you want to stop being laughed at then stop being a joke. Then you become an uninteresting sperg. KF has lots of those hell I am one. The mentality it takes to be a lolcow is so foreign to me because fuck if I got doxed and made fun of for being an idiot I would fucking get off the internet and stop giving milk.

 

[Sumptinsfuckey]

Why do lolcows do it? The simplest truth is if you want to stop being laughed at then stop being a joke. Then you become an uninteresting sperg. KF has lots of those hell I am one. The mentality it takes to be a lolcow is so foreign to me because fuck if I got doxed and made fun of for being an idiot I would fucking get off the internet and stop giving milk.

Because the internet is all they have. Every lolcow I have ever seen, chis-chan, rethan ralph, fatprick bloblinson, Shame Nopes, etc has a complete lack of an IRL social circle. They might at best have a SO, such at reethan, or fatprick, but they have no friends, no acquaintences, no social hobbies, etc. The closest they get to social interaction is online, and so they can't give it up.

 

[Blewberry Nausea]

Because the internet is all they have. Every lolcow I have ever seen, chis-chan, rethan ralph, fatprick bloblinson, Shame Nopes, etc has a complete lack of an IRL social circle. They might at best have a SO, such at reethan, or fatprick, but they have no friends, no acquaintences, no social hobbies, etc. The closest they get to social interaction is online, and so they can't give it up.

Yeah but so do many people. its all social media bullshit and faceberg posts. “FEELING SO CUTE IN MY JUICY COUTURE JEANS!!! #PrayforDarfour”

It isn’t like he even has people paying attention except us. Maybe this is the best he can do.

 

[Sumptinsfuckey]

Yeah but so do many people. its all social media bullshit and faceberg posts. “FEELING SO CUTE IN MY JUICY COUTURE JEANS!!! #PrayforDarfour”

It isn’t like he even has people paying attention except us. Maybe this is the best he can do.

Most people have at least a few friends. Hell I'm one of the most misanthropic assholes alive. I literally became a trucker because it allows me to spend the vast majority of my time alone, and even I have a small social circle IRL. shame, like most lolcows is just desperate to be seen and heard by soneone, anyone, and twitting alliws him to fool himself into believing he is.

 

[Anonymus Fluhre]

Best to archive what you find on that DewThePDX account. It's not going to last long. He seems to be already getting permabanned on subreddits.

I would also like to point out that his posts on /startrek come off as someone who just started watching the show in the past decade and thinks he knows better than the people who have been fans for 50 years. It's no wonder why mods there delete his comments and want him banned.

 

[Harbinger of the Demiurge]

Then you become an uninteresting sperg.

I think you just answered your own question. Nothing interesting to see = no attention. So let me comment on attention-seeking behavior a bit.
I read this book, How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. He said in the book that Freud said that people are motivated primarily by 2 urges: the sex urge and the urge to feel important. We even have terms for the negative manifestations of this behavior: sex pest and attention whore.
Shame, like others, feed off of this attention because they've been starved for it. It makes them feel important to have eyes on them. People like to have these 2 desires met, and they like it A LOT.
Look at Fatrick. That fucker straight up REPLIES to trolling attempts even when he knows they're trolling him. It makes him feel important to do so. Is it pleasurable to him to get trolled by OnA forums? No. But it makes him feel like he's important to get that attention, even if the emotions that he's experiencing are anxiety and anger.
I like to think of all human behavior in the framework of these 2 urges. I find that doing so explains a lot. I mean, here I am replying to your post. It got me thinking. You did something that I responded to, and now this is the result. Your ideas influenced my actions. My reaction to your post hopefully makes you feel like you contributed something of value (I think so), and thus makes you feel important.

As for Shame? Well, he's actually loving this attention. It makes him feel important. Which is why he feels the need to read the thread and comment on it via Tw@tter. He sure as shit ain't getting that attention from other places, judging by his Tweet engagement.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Shame (aka DewThePDX),

I am concerned about your mental health.
I know after your literal decades working for both Microsoft and The Government, you must be used to people treating you with a well-earned respect.
It must be nuts having such a background, attracting multiple people trying to steal your identity every single month, just for the taste of that raw Nokes power and authority.

View attachment 4987812

It must suck since you retired and now spend your life on this "cesspool" you called social media: hunting the big bad guys, yelling at random Christians, threatening people over star trek lore...

We can't be making things easier on you.

How many times have you had to watch Willy Wonka over the last week?

View attachment 4987696

What do you get when you guzzle down sweets?
You eat as much as an elephant eats?
What are you at, getting terribly fat
What do you think about that?

I don't like the look of it.

Or, you know, just don't have a social media footprint. If he was really concerned about people stealing his identity he could just not use anything that could be connected to his real life and the problem is solved. But we all know that he NEEDS to put these things out there to grow the size of his e-peener because it's so small and floppy in real life.

 

[ten dollars off]

Or, you know, just don't have a social media footprint. If he was really concerned about people stealing his identity he could just not use anything that could be connected to his real life and the problem is solved. But we all know that he NEEDS to put these things out there to grow the size of his e-peener because it's so small and floppy in real life.

His full name, work history, partner, and even photos of his W2 and MS Fan Club Discount card are readily available on his own publoic social media accounts.

Really, anyone who wants to run around larping as Shane online and being obnoxious has all of the ammo they need. Yet he worries about upvoting the wrong person on Reddit, lest his reputation be tarnished by such thoughtless endorsement.