Coming Out to Friends as a Transphobe

[Manimal House]

The topic has yet to come up with friends that aren't on the same page, but it did come up with family recently, specifically with my mother who is pretty left-leaning.
Thing is, she was 100 percent clueless about trans people. To her, they were basically just gay guys who wore dresses. I tried explaining to her what 'dilating' was without realizing that she didn't know trannies were getting surgery to get fake vaginas. I backtracked and told her about it and she looked like she wanted to puke and wanted to change the subject. Mission accomplished, I think.

After being here and seeing so much shit about the degenerate ugliness of the trans world, it's easy to forget that most people have NO IDEA about what goes on there. Trannies are part of the rainbow crew where everything bad about them gets glossed over and removed from the public square. I have some woke friends, but they're usually going on about things like 'fuck conservatives' or how racism is bad. Now that I think about it, I'm wondering if they never brought that up because they don't care that much about it, or if they have 'unpopular' opinions about it and are scared to speak up.

But it's probably because they just don't know. I didn't talk much about it before finding out what I know now, but that was when I was more open minded about the subject of trannies. Reminds me of a quote:

“Merely having an open mind is nothing. The object of opening the mind, as of opening the mouth, is to shut it again on something solid.” -G. K. Chesterton​

Basically, if you have friends/family/acquaintances that are dead set on the opinion that trannies are wonderful people who need support, then you're probably not going to change their minds because they've got their minds made up about it. If they don't really have much to say about it, then by all means, drop some info on them and see how they react. Just don't go into the REALLY fucked up info about it right off the bat, that's my advice.

 

[Dustlord]

Maybe its just my friend group, but nobody I know really gives a fuck about the tranny thing on either side. Its just not a common topic of discussion.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

Among my real friends I have no issue discussing the misogyny of mentally ill eunuches in dresses trying to erase women and subvert the issues paramount to women - childbirth, child rearing, reproductive healthcare, birth control, abortion and fighting the legalized oppression of women in non-western countries.

But it’s interesting how these friends agree with me, but are then terrified of expressing these opinion to their other “woke” friends. Last year I made some pretty blunt statements to an older left-wing couple and you could see the fear on their faces. They didn’t disagree but they had basically been taught by their left-wing adult daughter (who is near my age) that any such opinions were akin to supporting the lynching of blacks in 1965.

I’ve sadly watched the same type of “group think” infect left wing political circles that I used to observe afflicting staunchly religious groups on the right. The original appeal of the left wing to me was independent thinking, rejection of black and white thinking and protecting freedom of speech - and now that’s all gone.

A decade ago I belonged to an organization focused on abortion/women’s health care. About two years ago I noticed there was some major drama due to a few young millennials working at the group who had made a huge stink about the group needing to worry about transphobia instead of the actual stated mission of the organization for the past forty years. Accusations, drama, staff walk-outs, etc… up until that point the group had been bending over backwards for the troons. I wondered if the drama that occurred nearly destroying the org finally “woke” the adults up to the fact they were being bullied by mentally ill men in dresses.

No small irony that while troon’s bullied women’s groups and healthcare organizations into making their issues, feelings and hormones a #1 priority Roe v Wade got overturned. The right is correctly laughing their asses at this shit. All they needed to do was let a few crazy men put on dresses and makeup, and then suddenly “feminists” would happily start taking any and all marching orders from them or start eating their own in a inverted purity spiral.

 

[Halmaz]

I live in a country where LGBTQ+ horseshit is not popular at all, partly because the government is trying to keep it at bay, partly because we never reached western levels of nihilism. Because of this, the general population is at best unsympathetic, at worst, apathetic towards the movement. Few support it openly. For this reason, the topic of trannies rarely comes up in conversations. Most people think they are just gay men, who dress as women. This is changing however, people are starting to see the true nature of autogynephile freaks, as NGOs and faggot corporations are desperately trying to force their propaganda down our throats. It helps that government affiliated media reports on deviant tranny activities from around the world. Leftists usually hand wave the issue away, saying these cases are just outliers, not all trannies are like this and the government is using them as a distraction from real issues. Everyone else feels uneasy and disgusted, when they hear the truth.
Needless to say, the EU wants to cancel the entire country at this point, because we vote wrong and do not dance to their tune.
I just really, really hope people in the west finally break and finally put an end to this madness, before it consumes us, because I do not know how long we can kick the can down the road.

 

[Zetsubou]

Honestly? find new friends that you can actually speak to and just don't engage in that kind of conversation with your old friends. If your old friends insist on talking about it constantly and it upsets you, mention it. If they don't stop then some friends they were.

Or...you can buy some kiwifarms patches and see how long it takes them to notice, that sounds like more fun. If you're forced to see each other every day because of college or work then thats rough buddy.

 

[Dambusters' Dog II]

Hold up. Fatties justifying fatness is Russian propaganda now?

Despite the fact that the Democrat party seem to want to be known as "The Party that Cried Russia", Russian propaganda in foreign countries is a real thing. One of the best known examples is that they pushed the notion that the CIA created AIDS (archived). You'll find it hard to get the information out of the primary sources unless you have some command of Russian and German.

---

For the thread tax: Like others, I ease people in, and use a little bit of strategic misunderstanding to get out of accusations of any "-phobia"s or "-ism"s. I didn't reach my current position, that all "transness" is mental and nobody should have hormones or surgery for any kind of "gender affirmation", immediately, so it would be unreasonable to ask others to do so right away. People often resist my "misgendering" people who aren't present, even if they agree with me on other things.
One helpful thing is that I always immediately forget people's names when I first meet them, so before I ever knew of this trans business I had a practice of referring to other people by name and not pronoun to reinforce the memory to make it stick. This gives me a pre-made excuse for avoiding using pronouns with unfamiliar people.
The justification people give for "they/them" being acceptable is bullshit and I refuse to use it under any circumstances - nobody has ever provided an example of someone using they/them for a definite individual before the 21st century. The technical meaning of "singular they", the kind that has been used by Shakespeare, is where it refers to an indefinite person, as in "Has someone lost their shoe?". The corresponding definite version, "Stephanie has lost their shoe." is a very recent invention, I remember it being invented, and I'm not going to bend to attempts to rewrite history. I'm fully prepared to get busted for "transphobia" on this particular issue, because I know I can prove I'm right.

 

[BlaireWhitesBottom2]

I generally get more leeway from people when describing the stuff that I see because, well, look at my screen name

 

[Hepativore]

Depending on the people I am talking with, I either do not bring it up at all, or I preface my stance with the opinion that while true gender dysphoria is indeed a mental illness, albeit a rare one, we should not be treating people with body image disorders with major and irreversible surgery, just like we do not electively cut the limbs off of apotemnophiliacs or let people with anorexia starve themselves.

I have yet to have anybody explode on me for this, but it could be that I know to pick my battles with this issue in real life.

 

[crinklefry]

I'm very blunt with it. I just straight up go "I'm transphobic and here's why" and no one seems to interject. Mainly just because they know I'm stating straight up facts and there's nothing to oppose.

 

[Red Facist Bunny]

I'm very blunt with it. I just straight up go "I'm transphobic and here's why" and no one seems to interject. Mainly just because they know I'm stating straight up facts and there's nothing to oppose.

I more or less do the exact same, I've made my thoughts on the matter clear with everyone I know that trannies need to be lined up against a wall.

 

[Ifollowrivers]

I never thought that this was an issue in other parts of the world.

Luckily, where I live, troons are just not a part of daily conversation and most people don't give a fuck about them. They only really come up in discussions when we make fun of them, lol.

In my circle we only know about one troon and sometimes we have to hang out with her. We do respect her pronouns and call her by her new name, but everyone thinks she is mentally insane.

Last time she was telling us about her "period" and I swear to God, it was the most entertaining thing I ever heard. 10/10.

 

[Law]

When talking to friends and co-workers, I find that it's best to remember that the majority of people who are trans-supporters are good people who got caught up in a bad trend. Being hostile towards them or leading with amhole pics will only scare them away and make you come off as a hateful wierdo, even though you're right. Always try to be friendly, open and courteous. I think asking questions ("What did J. K. Rowling say?" "Why would drag queens want to perform to an audience of children?" "If Republicans are transphobic, why are Caitlyn Jenner and Jennifer Pritzker both Republicans?" "Why do large corporations like Raytheon and Target support the transgender movement?" "How is being trans like being gay, when you don't need pills or surgery to be gay?" "Will we ever see transmen become NFL players?" "Why can you become transgender, but not trans-race?" "You said that men would never dress up as women in order to creep on girls in a bathroom, but Amazon driver Jacob Guerrero was arrested in Massachusetts for allegedly using a pen camera attached to his sneaker to photograph young girls while he was wearing a blonde wig?" "You can't really control how other people perceive you, can you?") is very effective. Asking questions is a good way to keep a conversation going, and many people who are caught up in this trend haven't stopped to think about these things or have never had their assumptions questioned. Memorize a few good examples with specific details and have them ready to go (like that Jacob Guerrero one - reduxx.com is a news site with many horrifying examples of trans behaving badly). Avoid jargon and try to use the simplest language possible. Get ready for denial when you've triggered wrongthink - the "no true Scotsman" fallacy seems to be a favorite defense.

 

[One87five0]

My social group is very liberal / progressive, so the constant regurgitation of End Transphobia and anti-TERF sentiment is exhausting and I so very often want to contradict it with nuggets of terror from this site. But it seems like to even question the validity of a troon, their motivations, and so on is tantamount to calling a black person nigger to their face. It's probably worse. It's very frustrating.

Once upon a time, I was in the same boat you're currently in. I live in a very liberal state, in a very liberal city, and have a friend group that's politically diverse, but a lot of them lean to the left on most issues (abortion, LGB rights, immigration, etc). When I peaked, I decided to just say fuck it and make my feelings known... much to my surprise, most of my left leaning friends either agreed with me, but were previously too scared to speak up, or were at least willing to hear me out. I have three friends that agree to disagree with me, and out of mutual respect, we don't discuss troon shit, and one former friend that doesn't speak to me anymore.

My point is, your friends might surprise you. At the end of the day, this liberal vs. conservative shit is mostly just the media trying to turn us against each other... sane people, regardless of how they vote, still know what a man is and what a woman is, and understand that troons are inherently insane and dangerous. Liberals will loudly proclaim that TWAW in public, but behind closed doors, it's a different story.

 

[Mayor Cody Travers]

Once upon a time, I was in the same boat you're currently in. I live in a very liberal state, in a very liberal city, and have a friend group that's politically diverse, but a lot of them lean to the left on most issues (abortion, LGB rights, immigration, etc). When I peaked, I decided to just say fuck it and make my feelings known... much to my surprise, most of my left leaning friends either agreed with me, but were previously too scared to speak up, or were at least willing to hear me out. I have three friends that agree to disagree with me, and out of mutual respect, we don't discuss troon shit, and one former friend that doesn't speak to me anymore.

My point is, your friends might surprise you. At the end of the day, this liberal vs. conservative shit is mostly just the media trying to turn us against each other... sane people, regardless of how they vote, still know what a man is and what a woman is, and understand that troons are inherently insane and dangerous. Liberals will loudly proclaim that TWAW in public, but behind closed doors, it's a different story.

I've actually got an end result quite like this myself - that is, a lot more people WERE anti-troon or at the least concerned with all the visible psychos in it.

Not so surprising is that almost all the women I know are TERFs even when they're otherwise lefty or at least liberal. I mean, is it really so surprising? The interesting quirk is that many of them are 'diverse' - I know enough minorities but also full-fledged immigrants and daughters of immigrants - who are also not the richest people around, and because of these factors are definitely a lot more willing to sniff out fishy men and be wary anti-women issues. The only women I've known who tend to support the troon menace are bourgeois to middle class white women who conveniently never really deal with anything masculine that could harm them. Indeed, one basically cucked herself out and was apologizing over an ex that was 'exploring his gender identity'. And this when otherwise he sounded quite the asshole otherwise from how she described him.

I was pleasantly surprised by most of the dudes I know, though. It turns out a lot of them, like many men out there, are unfortunately forced to be wary on speaking out on cultural issues lately because of the current societal climate that seems ready to jump on masculinity/manhood, straightness, or whiteness and any combination thereof, but in private a lot of them were turned off at worst over these failed men and perverted women, and the lot of 'em actually quite worried for the womenfolk (since most could agree pooners would go nowhere fast if they press anything). It was quite good to speak man-to-man to my bros, and a lot of them stiffened hearing the awfulness that troons pulled on my woman and my (gay as fuck) brother. I know most of them would be similarly horrified to have these kinds of people hurt their own friends and family.

I wish more leftists would speak out, because I think that's going to be a big nail in the coffin for troons. No, not the only one by a longshot, but a needed one. Troons need to not have a political party or position to leech off of.

 

[Kürtzl]

If Dude:
>Get together with your friends.
>Make fun of random weird troon-dude you find funny.
>Do they seem angry? Frenzied?
>No?
>Then you'll probably be fine.

If Woman:
>Good Luck.
>You are probably fucked.
>Reproduce Dude-Process.
>Replace "frenzied" with "seriously outraged".

You could try to carefully test the waters, but its just not worth it.
All that's gonna do is prolong the time your paranoid about potentially losing your friends and family-members.
If you feel like you have to do it, come out of the TTD-Closet, deal with the consequences and cut ties with the people in your life that caused them.
If you don't, stay inside.

 

[WilsonOfPrussia]

When talking to friends and co-workers, I find that it's best to remember that the majority of people who are trans-supporters are good people who got caught up in a bad trend. Being hostile towards them or leading with amhole pics will only scare them away and make you come off as a hateful wierdo, even though you're right. Always try to be friendly, open and courteous. I think asking questions ("What did J. K. Rowling say?" "Why would drag queens want to perform to an audience of children?" "If Republicans are transphobic, why are Caitlyn Jenner and Jennifer Pritzker both Republicans?" "Why do large corporations like Raytheon and Target support the transgender movement?" "How is being trans like being gay, when you don't need pills or surgery to be gay?" "Will we ever see transmen become NFL players?" "Why can you become transgender, but not trans-race?" "You said that men would never dress up as women in order to creep on girls in a bathroom, but Amazon driver Jacob Guerrero was arrested in Massachusetts for allegedly using a pen camera attached to his sneaker to photograph young girls while he was wearing a blonde wig?" "You can't really control how other people perceive you, can you?") is very effective. Asking questions is a good way to keep a conversation going, and many people who are caught up in this trend haven't stopped to think about these things or have never had their assumptions questioned. Memorize a few good examples with specific details and have them ready to go (like that Jacob Guerrero one - reduxx.com is a news site with many horrifying examples of trans behaving badly). Avoid jargon and try to use the simplest language possible. Get ready for denial when you've triggered wrongthink - the "no true Scotsman" fallacy seems to be a favorite defense.

 

[The Mass Shooter Ron Soye]

I'm very blunt with it. I just straight up go "I'm transphobic and here's why" and no one seems to interject. Mainly just because they know I'm stating straight up facts and there's nothing to oppose.

It's important to open up the conversation with your friends and family by starting with a short monologue on why "transmisic" is the correct term, not "transphobic".

 

[Law]

Troons need to not have a political party or position to leech off of.

I think a good way to combat the forced-teaming of the Programmer Socks Menace is to focus on how troons are different from the causes they try to latch on to.
Troons are anti-capitalist? Well, no, troonery revolves around consuming accessories and clothes and buying crap you don't need. Buy-nothing hippie commies are not like troons.
Troons belong to the same category of people who experience same-sex attraction? Well, no, lots of troons are exclusively opposite-sex attracted. Gay and bisexual people are not like troons.
Troonery is the same as the body-positive/body-acceptance movement? Well, no, if you accepted your body you wouldn't need to change it with hormones and cosmetic surgery. Troons are not like people working to accept their looks and physical limitations.

 

[William Tyndale]

If someone is not normal - what you call “transphobic” - then I don’t want to hang out with them. If one of my close friends told me that they were pro trans I would hang out with them less and less until we weren’t friends. I can’t respect someone who holds those values. It’s unnatural.

Addendum: my local auto parts store recently hired a black tranny woman. She had a beard but I sniffed her out after she spoke her 2nd sentence. To her credit, for at least one sentence, I thought she was a fat black dude. But she had tits and you could tell she was forcing a lower-than-range voice to appear more masculine. It made me sad to think that the hiring pool is so low that an auto parts store had to hire a mentally ill black lesbian just to fill an open position. Times must be tough.

 

[Moosebonker]

Came out to a few friends I've known for 40 years or so, two Leafs and some Northern Bonglanders. Told them I hated trannies with a big smile while giggling like a schoolgirl. Tried to keep it light-hearted until I told them the reasons why. No-one argued against my assertion that they are a danger to women and kids. One woman's face was overcome with this look of utter disgust at the mention of trannies and seemed well informed and agreed with me. Later, another elderly gentleman brought up the subject unprompted and had that same look on his face.

There were a few fence-sitters, it seems to me, the more someone knows about the subject, the greater the hate. Hopefully I put the bug in their ear to pay more attention whenever trans are mentioned.

I'm going to do this more often, peaking people is my new hobby.