Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

TMDWTFIUD
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This isn't new but was posted on the Reddit today, and I don't know why because it's far from the strangest of his habits, but I found that his apparent routine of beating off while standing to be pretty bizarre.

Does anyone have an archive of this?
 
I asked ChatGPT to write a poem about Cobes in Shakespearean meter and this is what it outputted:

Hark! Listen well, and I shall tell a tale, Of one whose life hath followed tragic trail, A man of wit and whimsy, named Saunders, Known far and wide as "KingCobraJFS" by wagers.

He was born in fair Casper, Wyoming's clime, And spent his youth pursuing music sublime, With guitar and voice he sought to make his way, And earn a place among the stars one day.

But fate did not smile kindly on our friend, And many hardships did his path attend, Addiction, poverty, and loneliness did strike, And darkened every step he took alike.

Yet still he sang and played with all his heart, And shared his life with viewers from each part, Of the globe, who watched him smoke and drink, And listened to his every word and think.

So let us hear his story with due care, And marvel at the life of KingCobraJFS, rare, For though his tale may end in sorrow and pain, He has left an indelible mark on this earthly plane.
 
LIVE
Cobes got the bearded dragon from Ian, named Puff the Magic Dragon. Pet saga has officially begun.
How long until Puff is mod podged to a stick with a crystal?
He also said he's taken him out once, to watch an episode of Beavis and ButtHead together before letting him roam around the apartment, and that Clint is aware of it and complimented him on his lizard.
Expect the e-begging to be kicked up a notch, because he 'NEEDS CRICKETS AND WORMS AND MTN DEW AND DELTA-8 VAPES AND DORITOS AND OTHER STUFF FOR PUFF THE BEARDED DRAGON DUDES IM NOT GOING TO BUY ALCOHOL WITH IT IM CUTTING BACK FOR FUCKS SAKE DOOD'.


puff.png
 
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LIVE
Cobes got the bearded dragon from Ian, named Puff the Magic Dragon. Pet saga has officially begun.
How long until Puff is mod podged to a stick with a crystal?
He also said he's taken him out once, to watch an episode of Beavis and ButtHead together before letting him roam around the apartment, and that Clint is aware of it and complimented him on his lizard.
Expect the e-begging to be kicked up a notch, because he 'NEEDS CRICKETS AND WORMS AND MTN DEW AND DELTA-8 VAPES AND DORITOS AND OTHER STUFF FOR PUFF THE BEARDED DRAGON DUDES IM NOT GOING TO BUY ALCOHOL WITH IT IM CUTTING BACK FOR FUCKS SAKE DOOD'.


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Smdh video privated
Ayyy its back

But the calls to animal welfare are gonna start sooner or later now
 
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LIVE
Cobes got the bearded dragon from Ian, named Puff the Magic Dragon. Pet saga has officially begun.
How long until Puff is mod podged to a stick with a crystal?
He also said he's taken him out once, to watch an episode of Beavis and ButtHead together before letting him roam around the apartment, and that Clint is aware of it and complimented him on his lizard.
Expect the e-begging to be kicked up a notch, because he 'NEEDS CRICKETS AND WORMS AND MTN DEW AND DELTA-8 VAPES AND DORITOS AND OTHER STUFF FOR PUFF THE BEARDED DRAGON DUDES IM NOT GOING TO BUY ALCOHOL WITH IT IM CUTTING BACK FOR FUCKS SAKE DOOD'.


View attachment 5084067
I used have a leopard gecko, I'm legit slowly getting angry/concerned over that reptile. Cobes can barely take care of himself. We all know he's inevitably gonna try to handle it while wasted or making a food hack which will be a disaster....
 
That lizard will die within the year and then Reddit is going to call cobra an animal abuser I'm calling it now
Also he's gonna end his dry spell by fucking the lizard
It will take a lot less than a year. Lizzards are hard for someone of normal intelligence to take care of. And their respiratory system is as sensitive as a bird's. Even having a teflon pot in the house can kill them. The secondhand smoke/vape/duster will kill it even if he does everything else perfectly.
 
It will take a lot less than a year. Lizzards are hard for someone of normal intelligence to take care of. And their respiratory system is as sensitive as a bird's. Even having a teflon pot in the house can kill them. The secondhand smoke/vape/duster will kill it even if he does everything else perfectly.
When the lizard dies I will record a Minecraft funeral for it
 
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