Baldur's Gate III Announced - ...and it's coming to Google Stadia and PC

[PaladinBoo]

Okay Kero, keep your hands off the puppies

Your username fits you.

Watch it bro. They may ban together and down vote you while giving each other Winner stickers.

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LMAO! Mad. Really got under your skin huh?

 

[Mexican_Wizard_711]

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Kero, I know fucking dogs is easier than asking human women. But lower your autism

 

[Fag Albert]

Now sure the whole point of Baldur's Gate is that you can happily ditch the premade companions and roll with a band of mercenaries.

Is that something the dev team was going to make easier to do? I wouldnt mind not having to do the 4 instance thing to start

 

[SiccDicc]

Wasn't that just the githyanki? I remember the writer being super proud of her fucking other guys. Massive fuck.

Nah, seems all the female characters fuck around so far. They still haven't released the "good aligned" characters yet, so we'll see there.

It would be incredibly based and hilarious if only the evil characters are into polyamory.

 

[Mega Black]

Kero, I know fucking dogs is easier than asking human women. But lower your autism

I prefer a challenge, think I'll go into the woods to try and fuck a druid bear instead.

Nah, seems all the female characters fuck around so far. They still haven't released the "good aligned" characters yet, so we'll see there.

It would be incredibly based and hilarious if only the evil characters are into polyamory.

That's gay, and actually worth complaining about. I thought the Tiefling blood war girl was goodish? Does she constantly mention sucking cocks in hell?

 

[Mexican_Wizard_711]

Nah, seems all the female characters fuck around so far. They still haven't released the "good aligned" characters yet, so we'll see there.

It would be incredibly based and hilarious if only the evil characters are into polyamory.

Too Bad, the characters are unlikeable and Shit. I mean even Pathfinder WOTR had a much better Cast

I prefer a challenge, think I'll go into the woods to try and fuck a druid bear instead.

That's gay, and actually worth complaining about. I thought the Tiefling blood war girl was goodish? Does she constantly mention sucking cocks in hell?

Definitely something you would do, Kero

 

[Hikaru86]

Wait! That is suppose to be a drow? I thought it was an unfortunate looking aasimar. Were the developers so lazy that they couldn't be arsed to make the races look like the races?

Bro, they don't even brother with simple animation. What make you think they give a fuck about making the races looks right? They dicking around almost half decade with this shit game and everything still looks like no better than an alpha build.

 

[PaladinBoo]

Nah, seems all the female characters fuck around so far. They still haven't released the "good aligned" characters yet, so we'll see there.

It would be incredibly based and hilarious if only the evil characters are into polyamory.

I've also notice that many of the male characters seem to be "simpish" for a lack of a better word. This game maybe unintentional comedy gold. I hope it is. Redfall disappointed me with its awfulness since that game had no story while Gollum was just all around awful that it was disheartening. Here we may not only get a game that is so funny in its awfulness but some good memes out of it.

 

[robobobo]

I don't give a shit about a random dev throwing in a bear fucking cutscene for the luls in a game I wasn't gonna buy to begin with. That squirrel's reaction in the video makes me believe that it is actually supposed to be a stupid joke scene. What's making me raise my eyebrow are the people and media rallying around it who seem to be taking it seriously. "...and here's why bear fucking is a Good Thing."

 

[SiccDicc]

That's gay, and actually worth complaining about. I thought the Tiefling blood war girl was goodish? Does she constantly mention sucking cocks in hell?

That's what everyone on the Steam forums are saying. That the female characters thus far are all polyamorous sluts that you have to be evil to woo. Which again has incredibly hilarious unintended subtext.

It's also why I've been upset about the entire thing. It's the fucking hypocrisy of it all. You can't have pretty female characters that are decent people anymore because that's immoral and objectifying, but you can have a bear rail your MC and that's just so progressive. It's not about humor or anything because everything else about this game and how it's written is practically malicious. Unless Larian Studios had their writing team researching D&D by reading through r/D&D or r/D&DHorrorStories and deciding to mock all of the losers on there, I think a lot of you are giving them too much credit. You saw their audience in Panel from Hell, danger hairs galore, that's who they're catering to.

I mean, it could be a joke. It probably was supposed to be, but they're gonna ride this progressive wagon. I guarantee it.

 

[Vecr]

Sounds like a classic <<fantasy moment>> to me. I remember there was some fantasy series that's infamous for having the main character get transported to a fantasy world, and then immediately rape someone because he thought it was a dream.

 

[Mega Black]

It's also why I've been upset about the entire thing. It's the fucking hypocrisy of it all. You can't have pretty female characters that are decent people anymore because that's immoral and objectifying, but you can have a bear rail your MC and that's just so progressive. It's not about humor or anything because everything else about this game and how it's written is practically malicious

I don't think the game is anything other than woke as fuck, I just think all the belly aching about the bear is way over the top. As far as being malicious I'll have to take your word for it, I don't buy early access trash. If there's no decent romance for heteros then I'd agree it's shitty as fuck.

It was also a transparent marketing attempt that everyone immediately fell for and that's funny to me. Probably the only good example of outrage marketing I've seen in years.

The real black mark to me is that it is just yet another unfunny Larian joke about fucking something stupid because it's random and silly and you aren't supposed to take the game seriously and Larian writes their RPGs like that and it makes them impossible to enjoy for me.

Sounds like a classic <<fantasy moment>> to me. I remember there was some fantasy series that's infamous for having the main character get transported to a fantasy world, and then immediately rape someone because he thought it was a dream.

I've heard of that book but forget the title. Fantasy is a horny degenerate genre so it's nothing new, really.

Also what kind of a psychopath wakes up in what they think is a dream and decides to rape?

 

[PaladinBoo]

That's what everyone on the Steam forums are saying. That the female characters thus far are all polyamorous sluts that you have to be evil to woo. Which again has incredibly hilarious unintended subtext.

It's also why I've been upset about the entire thing. It's the fucking hypocrisy of it all. You can't have pretty female characters that are decent people anymore because that's immoral and objectifying, but you can have a bear rail your MC and that's just so progressive. It's not about humor or anything because everything else about this game and how it's written is practically malicious. Unless Larian Studios had their writing team researching D&D by reading through r/D&D or r/D&DHorrorStories and deciding to mock all of the losers on there, I think a lot of you are giving them too much credit. You saw their audience in Panel from Hell, danger hairs galore, that's who they're catering to.

I mean, it could be a joke. It probably was supposed to be, but they're gonna ride this progressive wagon. I guarantee it.

This! It would have actually been funny if you would have gotten shame for wanting to fuck the druid as a bear with the druid and other people saying; "What are you? A weirdo?" Like they did with Fisto in New Vegas. Instead, like you said, Larian and WotC are riding the progressive wagon. We've seen and heard about the types of people who both Larian and WotC are pandering to. Den of Drake and CritCrab have a long list of videos of the horror stories of the new types of fans that are into D&D. From the looks of it this game seems like it was made for these new fans and not veteran fans of the OG Baldur's Gate.

 

[SiccDicc]

Also what kind of a psychopath wakes up in what they think is a dream and decides to rape?

Apparently the same one that wrote a scene in this game where a dominatrix entity invades your dream and basically rapes you. You keep saying no, but you roll saves or some shit.

It's just so fucking ridiculous to me because any DM doing this shit IRL gets blacklisted from the store. And if you're going to their house to game and this happens, you ain't leaving.

 

[Tor Lugosi]

That's gay, and actually worth complaining about. I thought the Tiefling blood war girl was goodish?

As far as I've read, she is one of the 'good' characters that wants to help people and prefers a 'nice' MC. Jaheria, if she is romanceable, will probably be the other 'good' love interest. The re-written Shadowheart seems to be a neutral option -- she doesn't seem to mind helping out people but also doesn't want you to go out of you way just to do good (especially for zero reward). On the evil end of the spectrum you have the gith frog chick who only respects strength and a typical drow.

 

[Mexican_Wizard_711]

Sounds like a classic <<fantasy moment>> to me. I remember there was some fantasy series that's infamous for having the main character get transported to a fantasy world, and then immediately rape someone because he thought it was a dream.

Thomas Covenant

 

[PaladinBoo]

Apparently the same one that wrote a scene in this game where a dominatrix entity invades your dream and basically rapes you. You keep saying no, but you roll saves or some shit.

It's just so fucking ridiculous to me because any DM doing this shit IRL gets blacklisted from the store. And if you're going to their house to game and this happens, you ain't leaving.

Yeah, that dommy entity encounters is making me wonder how this got past something like HR or marketing. They have to have known that the modern D&D fanbase is so pozzed that many tables make you sign consent forums for things like romance and sexual encounters. Unless they make this optional at the start of the game I foresee a lot of outrage over this on Twitter.

 

[X Prime]

Because to many it's funny and then to a small subset of weirdos it gets them aroused. As a resident Simpsons nerd I hate referencing shitty post-golden age episodes of the Simpsons but they pretty much did the same thing in a Treehouse of Horror.

Like that's the same shit, actually this clip from The Simpsons is more sexual in nature because you hear Homer and Panther-Marge fucking. Back to video games is it that different from having your player's character get pounded by FISTO?

You guys are acting like Larian is hiding 5 minutes of Bear on Human fucking. Maybe Coomer Modders will make that reality but they're not going to get the game on Xbox and Playstation if they included that. It ends with the Squirrel dropping a nut in bewilderment. It's a gag.

This is quite possibly the most degenerate and Jewiest post I have ever seen. Well done.

 

[SIMIΔN]

The sad reality is people don't get all excited because you've JK Simmons voicing a major character.

Omni-Man could never believably play a villain.

 

[Snekposter]

You just know that the most popular mods for this game are going to be beauty mods.

We both know they're going to be taken down from sites using specious reasoning.

Wait! That is suppose to be a drow? I thought it was an unfortunate looking aasimar. Were the developers so lazy that they couldn't be arsed to make the races look like the races?

Drow quit being black a little while back because you know... racism.

Like they did with Fisto in New Vegas.

Fisto is great. Not because he exists, but because James Garret can't keep his pants up around robots and is pulling the whole "No no, its for those other people, you know, the disgusting robot fuckers!" bullshit nobody has ever bought.