Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

When will Jack drop dead?

  • February-March 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • April-May 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • June-July 2024

    Votes: 18 1.3%
  • August-September 2024

    Votes: 34 2.4%
  • October-November 2024

    Votes: 37 2.7%
  • December 2024

    Votes: 44 3.2%
  • Sometime in 2025

    Votes: 258 18.5%
  • Sometime in 2026

    Votes: 197 14.2%
  • Jack lives forever. The Wendigo Must Consoom

    Votes: 792 56.9%

  • Total voters
    1,392

Pizza Oven by Drop Shittor.


Jack is weirdly smug and sassy here. I don't like it.
Jack fellates his pizza slicer.

Him having the oven set up on a glass table was exciting, but my hopes were dashed, it didn't shatter and burn the house down.

Jack yells at the dog again.

Holy fuck those pizzas look like a war crime.

I bet he made Tammy eat the burned one.

Will Jack hang himself in the fall? We can only hope.
 
Jack reviewed a new product

I love how Jack shows the shipping label on the screen as if he's shoving it in the face of doxers yet his camera is such hot garbage, one can barely make sense of it anyway.

He starts off by introducing the cheap accessories as if his braindead audience doesn't know what they are. "This is a pair of thongs, this is a pizza cutter, this is cardboard wrapping and this is the label" yes Jack we know what they are.

Like any Amerimutt backyard, it's perfectly trimmed and a haven of flies, yuck. He claims it's going to take some practice to use the pizza oven correctly, seriously?

Oh, it's Jack.
gross.jpg

Also, this is the purchase link (don't click).
https:// s .vevor.com/bfQnLw
That's essentially an affiliate link. So Jack was paid to do this review, yet he didn't even have the decency to ask them how to pronounce the company's name. Shocker.

By the way, that pizza oven appears to be a clone of some Britbong brand called Ooni, which sells for over $400+.
 
Jack reviewed a new product

Omg, get that harness off that poor fucking dog. Jfc, these people.
Jfc Jack propping up his meat log of an arm remnant in the Vevor video. The shit is discolored mate what the fuck are you doing to it nigger.
It looks so uncanny and painful. Idk much about strokes, but I wonder if that shit tingles like when your foot falls asleep.

Also, I noticed Jack said this was his first time out on that patio. Said it was because of his "illness." That's pretty sad, because it shouldn't be that hard for him to hobble outside or have someone wheel him out there or something. Is it his own lack of interest in his own backyard, or is it that the rest of his family is so sick of him that they won't provide the basic amount of help to get him out there (which I wouldn't even blame them for)? It's a flat, elevated surface. It shouldn't be that hard to get him out there. And a normal human being would find such scenery to be really enriching, especially if they're crippled and can't do literally anything else.
 
Jack reviewed a new product

Wow, Jack, you really went all out on that cheese. I can tell by the way it did not completely melt that it is really the good shit.

I cannot believe they are still making videos. Does it even generate positive revenue for them at this point? It just seems like Tammy is fucking with him.
 
Wow, Jack, you really went all out on that cheese. I can tell by the way it did not completely melt that it is really the good shit.

I cannot believe they are still making videos. Does it even generate positive revenue for them at this point? It just seems like Tammy is fucking with him.
Jack doesn't make videos for the money, he does it for the feeling of fame and success. Whether he breaks even or not really depends on what you count as the costs of video production, most of it is shit he'd probably end up buying anyway, so as long as he's making *something* it could be considered positive revenue
 
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This moment is the perfect summary of Jack: Tongue fully deployed while single handedly shoving an entire serving of meat into his mouth.

EDIT: Also, Jack is being feisty in the comments section:
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Jack is really sticking to the whole "My multiple kidney stones were caused by everything but me" story.
Hold on? I thought the water in Hendersonville was too hard which is why he had so many kidney stones? Now it's because he ate broccoli? If so I'm sure we can look back at his recipes where he's made broccoli usually doused in cheese and fat and grease and happily ate it. Unless this is a recent thing and he's been listening to Charles about broccoli being bad.

And of course he gets pissy about the food not being Korean. Although he should have clapped back with some of the meat being "bulgogi".

That seems kind of redundant. What kind of disgusting, useless, pile of human adipose would sit around eating for 2+ hours?

...oh right, forgot which thread I was in.

It's usually one of those "celebration" things where you go out after work because you've done a good job that month and your boss picks up the tab. It's a way to build morale. But it's like all those "all you can eat" joints where you never get the full value you paid for and the food is decent but not great.
 
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