Share Your School Stories - Weirdos, freaks, and idiots (self-inclusion optional)

My freshman year in HS our electronic bell broke. The broken noise sounded like a fart. We all spent a week laughing until it was fixed. A couple days after it broke again and I guess the school said fuck it this aint in our budget so my whole high school existence we had a fart bell between classes. Gotta get to class before the second fart! We all got used to it but it did startle a few new people and foreign exchange students. Imagine being new from a different country being like "Hinga Dinga Durgen! my first day of american school!" "BLRLRRRRT" everyone gets up casually and starts heading to the next class. Olga: "🙃"
 
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Carpe Jugulum said:
My form class in high school got labelled “the worst they’d ever seen”. In one year we collectively were responsible for two nervous breakdowns and a retirement.

I’m sure our form teacher got pregnant deliberately so she could escape on maternity leave.
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Is there enough material for a school comedy movie?
 
There was a girl at my high school who tried her hardest to cause drama and failed pretty pathetically.

This was around 2002 or so. She was tubby and emo, wore ridiculous clothes with tons of straps and buckles, had short hair dyed black and that "bleeding from the eyes" makeup style. She was also "gay." Because everyone in her social group was "gay" and troonery hadn't been invented yet, and so didn't exist.

She and that whole group were insistent on living in fear of homophobic Christian fundies, which really weren't a thing. Which is why she and the other "gay" kids were just ignored like everyone else and allowed to act how they wanted. Nobody cared.

A dance was coming up and she saw her perfect chance to be oppressed by "fundies."

She went to the office to buy some tickets and made sure to mention her date was another girl. Okay, fine.

She then said the other girl would be wearing a tuxedo. Cool.

Next, she said the other girl would be a student from a different school. Whatever.

Then she finally said this girl was like 22 or something. That actually was against the rules since someone over 21 could presumably buy alcohol for kids, and so wouldn't be allowed to come. Plus, emo girl was like 16. The office lady was annoyed and creeped out, but sold her the tickets anyway, saying all guests from other schools etc would have their ID checked and the staff working the door would handle it.

The girl instantly cried "homophobia" and organized a protest against the fundies. Said protest was just her sitting alone on the sidewalk by the bus stop with a sign saying "Hate is Not a Family Value" for part of the day. She got her picture in a local newspaper for it. Not sure she even went to the dance, or wanted to. And her mystery date most likely never existed. But nobody enabled weirdo behavior, so she just resumed her usual shtick of being goofy looking.

I was reminded of this when I saw some pictures of her online the other day. Since trooning and groomers weren't a thing, She seems to have normalized and is successful and good looking with a husband and kids, and is still even a bit goth-y in a cute and not obnoxious way.

Was a pleasant surprise, and I'm happy for her. Can't imagine how she would have turned out if groomers, social media, troonery, etc had been around.
 
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I can't believe I posted this but never in the school stories thread.
So, in high-school I knew this guy named Killian. Weird name, but whatever.
He always wore military surplus acu gear, even had custom patches and a UNSC patch.
Homie would always spout off random facts about guns and warfare. Had the library specifically order Art of War.
Then one day, a substitute teacher calls "Julian. " Who the fuck is Julian?
Turns out it's Killian and he's been going by this name since 7th grade. At lunch we're talking to him about why he goes by Killian and his exact words were "It's short for Killionaire from halo. When I join the US marines, I'm gonna be a one man force multiplier. "
He'd also read comics and the halo books in class.
I remember he did a book report on Halo the Fall of reach and during a history unit compared the covenant to the crusades.
He got super into anime after learning the elites are basically space samurai. Homie ended up becoming a Gymcel. Spends every hour at the gym playing anime while running on the treadmill. He claims it helps him go beyond his limits.
 
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TV's Adam West said:
Spends every hour at the gym playing anime while running on the treadmill. He claims it helps him go beyond his limits.
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Sounds like a massive autist. Also sounds like he could have been fun to hang around with. I knew someone like this but it was in college and he was obsessed with Spetznaz.
 
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TV's Adam West said:
I can't believe I posted this but never in the school stories thread.
So, in high-school I knew this guy named Killian. Weird name, but whatever.
He always wore military surplus acu gear, even had custom patches and a UNSC patch.
Homie would always spout off random facts about guns and warfare. Had the library specifically order Art of War.
Then one day, a substitute teacher calls "Julian. " Who the fuck is Julian?
Turns out it's Killian and he's been going by this name since 7th grade. At lunch we're talking to him about why he goes by Killian and his exact words were "It's short for Killionaire from halo. When I join the US marines, I'm gonna be a one man force multiplier. "
He'd also read comics and the halo books in class.
I remember he did a book report on Halo the Fall of reach and during a history unit compared the covenant to the crusades.
He got super into anime after learning the elites are basically space samurai. Homie ended up becoming a Gymcel. Spends every hour at the gym playing anime while running on the treadmill. He claims it helps him go beyond his limits.
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Well, at least he hasn't trooned out. Yet.
 
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Knew a black kid in middle school. Pitch black, couldn't see him at night. One time he was in home room earlier than everyone and when kids went inside he had covered his body in chalk from his waist to his head. Did he wanted to see what it was like to be white. Another time be colored his entire arm in blue pen ink. He'd eat his scabs to "recycle them". He was strong as he'll, he'd beat the shit out of anyone who tried to bully him directly, but everyone just kind of talked shit to his face because he was a bit slow.
Didn't think about it until recently that he was probably picked on by"light skinned" black kids, and the chalk and ink thing were probably a reaction to that. Black kids are mean. Another one was the black kid with Gotenks, Vegito, and Kid Buu stenciled into his jeans tackling a guy who stole something out of his book bag while everyone was outside the school in the morning.
 
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There was this black chick in high school that found out I liked the Nightmare on Elm Street movies too and went full autist. She’d follow me out to the “smoking area” at lunch (little cluster of trees a ways off campus we’d hide in to get our nic fix) wanting to sperg out and do deep dive analysis on every single aspect of every single movie. One of my first encounters with an autist who just eats, breathes and sleeps their hobby/interest at the exclusion of everything else. She wanted to go to a Halloween party together with me as Freddy and her as the asthmatic black girl from the fourth movie. I started trying to keep my distance after that.
 
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The high school I attended had a big problem with kids causing trouble.

One day the fire alarm went off during lunch so everyone left the building to wait outside for the all-clear. While outside two black girls got into a fight and a bunch of students gathered around to watch while others climbed on top of a small wall to throw dirt, sand, and garbage into the crowd. The hall monitors broke up the fight but more started when everyone went back inside. Less than ten minutes after classes resumed all students were told to evacuate the building and head home. When I went outside I saw more fights being broken up and multiple police cars and even an ambulance arriving at the school. It turned out there was a fight that resulted in someone pulling a fire alarm which caused the students to start rioting, there were even stabbings that took place.

There was also the time the high school went into lockdown after a gang threatened to shoot it up.
 
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Papa stink said:
The high school I attended had a big problem with kids causing trouble.

One day the fire alarm went off during lunch so everyone left the building to wait outside for the all-clear. While outside two black girls got into a fight and a bunch of students gathered around to watch while others climbed on top of a small wall to throw dirt, sand, and garbage into the crowd. The hall monitors broke up the fight but more started when everyone went back inside. Less than ten minutes after classes resumed all students were told to evacuate the building and head home. When I went outside I saw more fights being broken up and multiple police cars and even an ambulance arriving at the school. It turned out there was a fight that resulted in someone pulling a fire alarm which caused the students to start rioting, there were even stabbings that took place.

There was also the time the high school went into lockdown after a gang threatened to shoot it up.
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You sure went to a really ghetto ass school.
 
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Papa stink said:
There was also the time the high school went into lockdown after a gang threatened to shoot it up.
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Although I finished school before violence-induced lockdowns became a thing, it was rumored that someone might call in a bomb threat during our basketball game with the defending league champions if they were winning late in the game so that the game would be ended prematurely with the final score in their favor.

Spoiler: We led most of the game and ended up winning, so it never happened.
 
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Meat Target said:
I took a dodgeball to the nuts, thrown by one of the jocks at point blank. Put me on my knees wailing. Everyone laughed, including the teacher and myself.
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I took a Gatorade bottle (not completely full) to the crotch once, got thrown by the kid that would later take 9th grade three times.

I eventually had to see a doctor a few weeks later involving my still-hurting dick, but it managed to heal up okay (no surgery or nothing)


Broseph said:
You sure went to a really ghetto ass school.
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Kind of reminds me of my school, really. We used to fight our cross-town rival B— with "Black Out B—" as a theme (wearing all black to the game and on the Friday). It was axed after my junior year, either from one kid who got sent home who painted his skin black (not in an offensive "minstrel show" style, just paint), or the fact that during the pep rally when the lights went out, the crowd that year was too rowdy (throwing items down onto the cheerleaders, like batteries).

Mid-day (unskippable) pep rallies were also banned after someone got stabbed on the way back to school (the stadium was across the street and the school had a massive population, crowd control was basically impossible).
 
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Xarpho's Return said:
I took a Gatorade bottle (not completely full) to the crotch once, got thrown by the kid that would later take 9th grade three times.

I eventually had to see a doctor a few weeks later involving my still-hurting dick, but it managed to heal up okay (no surgery or nothing)
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Not trying to one up you but the first time I got hit in the nuts was when I was in the 3rd grade or something like that. It was gym class, it was tag or something like that, and I'm running and there's a girl running in my direction and I thought she'd move but she did not. She ran and knee'd my nuts. It was an accident and she said sorry. I collapsed to the ground but managed to walk it off.

The girl is now a makeup Youtuber.
 
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BrunoMattei said:
Not trying to one up you but the first time I got hit in the nuts was when I was in the 3rd grade or something like that. It was gym class, it was tag or something like that, and I'm running and there's a girl running in my direction and I thought she'd move but she did not. She ran and knee'd my nuts. It was an accident and she said sorry. I collapsed to the ground but managed to walk it off.

The girl is now a makeup Youtuber.
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Do they still work
 
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