Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

[Procrastinhater]

i've never been tempted to @ patrick until i read this. i can visualize the response already.

"No, stalker, I did not write that, and no, child, there aren't."

Pat is the only cow I've ever been tempted to contact personally. I never have because I realized his responses are so formulaic it would be no different to recieving a Patpost from any user on this thread. It's just not worth the effort of making a burner Xitter account.

 

[Tiberius Rising]

Patrick's been tweeting (sorry, xitting) non-stop for 17 hours. Childing stalkers and musing about the latest Star Wars slop with no sleep or rest.

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Whoa man, this shit is deep.

Pests make fun of a fat man.
Fat man threatens jail time to Pests.

Almost like there's synergy.

 

[internet friend]

Edit: I can see Fat's personality being uploaded to HAL9000 though. "No, stalker child, I will not open the pod bay doors. Continued contact constitutes felony module-entering. Enjoy space."

I think you do a great disservice to HAL9000. After all, HAL9000 only became unstable due it it's impossible task of simultaneously being completely accurate while also having to lie and hide details of the mission. Fatrick, on the other hand, would have absolutely 0 problems believing two completely contradictory things, child.

 

[Anasûrimbor Kellhus]

Holy fuck, is that actually his channel? It's from 2011, so I guess so.

This video is amazing.

Not only is Fatrick so dumb that he combines tea and instant ramen, but he manages to dump the ramen flavor packet into the boiling water and barely escapes boiling his hoof while retrieving it. That's right. He's too fucking stupid to make instant ramen.

damn it I hate having to have any sort of defense for pat but its kinda clear this is just some shitty joke video not a serious culinary effort on his part.

 

[DSP's Tax Lawyer]

damn it I hate having to have any sort of defense for pat but its kinda clear this is just some shitty joke video not a serious culinary effort on his part.

No stalker child, I do not joke about food. Enjoy prison

 

[TouchFluffyTail]

Pests make fun of a fat man.
Fat man threatens jail time to Pests.

Almost like there's synergy.

"It's like poetry, it rhymes. Each stanza kinda rhymes with the last one"

 

[John Andrews Stan]

What impresses me the most is he actually sounded genuinely surprised at the end when he said it tasted like shit.

Again, that was Pat’s attempt at a bit. He probably thought it would go viral. Hard to believe someone could be that delusional, but this is Pathetic Pattie we’re talking about.

 

[Chongqing]

Enjoy space.

This sounds so wholesome.

This is what Pat would say if he was a lighthearted, well-adjusted guy who wanted to bolster his image as a published sci-fi author.

And he'd only say it like once or twice a year to cap off a point.

Somewhere, in a parallel universe, is a reasonable Pat.

 

[Reverend]

I asked ChatGPT to write me a the opening party of a Sci-Fi story as if it was written by Fatrick McTomlinson. ChatGPT knows who he is and his writing style:

In the dark expanse of the cosmos, where the infinite tapestry of stars hung like a glistening cloak, and the boundless void whispered secrets only the bravest souls dared to unravel, there was a tiny speck of humanity nestled within the belly of a colossal spacecraft. This was the last bastion of Earth's culinary tradition, a sacred realm where spatulas and skillets soared alongside starships, and where gastronomic curiosity knew no earthly bounds. Amidst the vast reaches of the universe, where astronauts dreamt of the unknown, a daring crew embarked on a mission not only to explore the farthest reaches of space but to answer the cosmic question that had long eluded them: How do you cook sausages in zero gravity?

Captain Aiden Forrester, a man whose considerable girth was only rivaled by his ever-present financial woes, stood in the ship's galley, pondering the sausage conundrum. As he watched the sausages float gently in their packaging, he couldn't help but mutter to himself, "If we can figure out how to grill these in space, maybe I won't have to worry about being both fat and broke back on Earth."

His comrade, Lieutenant Emily Park, an astrophysicist turned amateur chef, chimed in with a wry smile, "Well, Aiden, maybe we'll discover the secret to gourmet space sausages, and you can start a space food truck empire when we get back home. It's not like our culinary experiments will make us any richer out here."

Aiden chuckled, his ample belly jiggling slightly as he nodded in agreement. "True, Emily. But if we can master the art of sausage grilling in space, we'll have achieved something extraordinary. And who knows, maybe that'll be the ticket to fortune and fame, even for a couple of broke space explorers like us."

As they continued their culinary odyssey amidst the stars, the crew of the spacecraft knew that they weren't just searching for answers about sausages in zero gravity; they were chasing dreams, defying gravity, and savoring the flavors of hope in a universe where the pursuit of both riches and culinary excellence knew no bounds.

I think it captured the essence of the topics I gave it quite well...

 

[Broadside]

In addition to that wererat tale that was already linked, which is some fanfiction he turned into a novella, there's a short story in a book called "A Walk In The Abyss", which is the same world as his wererat fanfiction iirc.

https://www.fantasticfiction.com/t/patrick-s-tomlinson/walk-in-the-abyss.htm (I grabbed the book from an illegal online library, the story itself is about 1300 words)



(He did another fanfiction novella in that same Abyss Walker universe called The Sword From The Sky. Here's a quote from the synopsis that tickled my ribs)

That arrow story was so fucking gay I can't get over it. I bet he thought it was so unique too. A story from the pov of a knight's horse or the diary of his page would've been a unique take on perspective. But an arrow? Fucking autism.

 

[TheAmbiguousLurker]

Patrick don't you have a daughter? Wouldn't there be more productive uses of your time than livetweeting about a gay fucking starwars show?

You'd think a supposed hard sci-fi author would understand how retarded comparing size and weight when it comes to a sword that is composed of 90% energy. A lightsaber isn't suddenly heavier or more defensive because you add a pointless crossguard to it.

 

[Pork Packer]

Well its been a few days since I moseyed on over to his twitter, wonder if he has calmed do...

Spoiler: LAST 2 HOURS OF FAT

No...he's still a an angry little oinker

Also he seems pissed enough once again to start dancing dangerously close to the prawblematic line by saying someone is "cognitively impaired" as an insult, which is literally just his fat faggot (with bitch tits) way of shrieking retard at the people mocking him. Sadly he is such a nobody theres zero impetus to form a mob against him from the usual suspects.

 

[DSP's Tax Lawyer]

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Well its been a few days since I moseyed on over to his twitter, wonder if he has calmed do...

Spoiler: LAST 2 HOURS OF FAT

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No...he's still a an angry little oinker

Also he seems pissed enough once again to start dancing dangerously close to the prawblematic line by saying someone is "cognitively impaired" as an insult, which is literally just his fat faggot (with bitch tits) way of shrieking retard at the people mocking him. Sadly he is such a nobody theres zero impetus to form a mob against him from the usual suspects.

Archived it for anyone who is interested in reading it. He is finally getting some real attention. Its funny to watch him and floor shitter interact with real people who realize he's full of shit

 

[Pork Packer]

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Archived it for anyone who is interested in reading it. He is finally getting some real attention. Its funny to watch him and floor shitter interact with real people who realize he's full of shit

Aye, he has been lashing out at non-trolls quite a bit recently which has resulted in his full NO-STALKER-CHILD-ENJOY-PRISON babble being vented at unsuspecting members of the twitter public.

 

[Associate Rick]

Well its been a few days since I moseyed on over to his twitter, wonder if he has calmed do...

Spoiler: LAST 2 HOURS OF FAT

View attachment 5320246

No...he's still a an angry little oinker

Also he seems pissed enough once again to start dancing dangerously close to the prawblematic line by saying someone is "cognitively impaired" as an insult, which is literally just his fat faggot (with bitch tits) way of shrieking retard at the people mocking him. Sadly he is such a nobody theres zero impetus to form a mob against him from the usual suspects.

From ONA, some of these overlap and there's a lot here.

Carrying on from his run in with Leslie, Rick continues to foster good will among the writing and publishing community and now we also get to see the Internet Tough Guy Tagteam of Rick and the retarded streetshitter Jackie attacking anyone who doesn't believe the bullshit he's peddling.

Technicality Tomlinson rears his head again "We didn't lose a lawsuit, child. Our lawsuit was withdrawn and never heard in court after we were unable to identify the anonymous criminals stalking us."

 

[Anasûrimbor Kellhus]

From ONA, some of these overlap and there's a lot here.

Carrying on from his run in with Leslie, Rick continues to foster good will among the writing and publishing community and now we also get to see the Internet Tough Guy Tagteam of Rick and the retarded streetshitter Jackie attacking anyone who doesn't believe the bullshit he's peddling.

Technicality Tomlinson rears his head again "We didn't lose a lawsuit, child. Our lawsuit was withdrawn and never heard in court after we were unable to identify the anonymous criminals stalking us."

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it starts with these guys and this can/will escalate. I guess patty really is favoring correcting the record of his internet reputation at the cost of his IRL reputation.

 

[AnOminous]

Doesn't he primary tweet about Star Trek and Star Wars? Both of them are incredibly soft sci-fi.
Star Trek is primarily over social issues, and Star Wars is so far removed from any scientific reality it is straight up space-fantasy.

Not exactly the franchises one would expect a "hard" sci-fi writer to fanboy over.
It is almost as if he is a retarded consoomer like Film-Robert.

Star Wars is what used to be called space opera. I'd disagree to some extent with Trek. There's at least some internal consistency to it and while it tends towards social rather than science issues, a lot of the classic TOS episodes were by legendary figures of the genre.

I'll note though that when I talk about either franchise I generally mean the original trilogy of SW and TOS and TNG rather than the utter bilge that followed. Neither franchise is really currently alive as far as I'm concerned.

 

[DSP's Tax Lawyer]

it starts with these guys and this can/will escalate. I guess patty really is favoring correcting the record of his internet reputation at the cost of his IRL reputation.

Man now you got me on the thought of Fatrick and floor shitter being dragged to court for defamation and being forced to pay out more money because they are retards on twitter

 

[AnOminous]

Also he seems pissed enough once again to start dancing dangerously close to the prawblematic line by saying someone is "cognitively impaired" as an insult, which is literally just his fat faggot (with bitch tits) way of shrieking retard at the people mocking him. Sadly he is such a nobody theres zero impetus to form a mob against him from the usual suspects.

That's the thing about Rick. He's so insignificant he can't be canceled. You can't cancel what effectively doesn't even exist (except as a vaguely pig-shaped mass of lipids).

Technicality Tomlinson rears his head again "We didn't lose a lawsuit, child. Our lawsuit was withdrawn and never heard in court after we were unable to identify the anonymous criminals stalking us."

And sanctioned for the frivolity of his ridiculous discovery escapades, he seems to forget that part.

He can play semantic games all he likes, both he and the pedophile guild known as the SFWA are out over six figures for his bullshit.

Quasi Status: Paid.

 

[Dean Pentel]

No, he routinely rages so hard that his incessant nearly identical responses have typos in them. He's actually raging and fat-fingering at his keyboard posting these things nonstop.

Sir, it's impossible for him to not fat-finger anything these days. He's quite overweight.

Hustensaftschmuggler - A 'cough syrup smuggler', as in a person who devotes way too much time and effort into pointless things.

This one made me laugh hard. It encapsulates him perfectly.

same retarded pose, but he actually looks less fat in his youtube avatar than the one on his shxitter. has to be a very old pic (or, you know, 'shopped) since he's got some facial hair and i'm not seeing any grays.

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kind of sucks looking at older, better photos of people who nowadays are incredibly repulsive, physically and mentally and within interactions with others. a few weeks ago i saw how iDubbbz looked in his heyday, before Anisa emasculated him, and i was taken aback. this photo of Fat Rick is much less arrogant and condescending than the black & white author photo he cherishes; doesn't even seem like the same person.

Was this picture taken before he became an Official Tough Guy? It's hard to tell because he's always had that baby-soft looking hand in any photos I've ever seen of him.

Why the fuck not? Are you just saying you'd prefer to smash it with a tire iron? Why the fuck wouldn't you punch it?

Because if you slap him he'll make that girly little shriek. That will be doubly satisfying. If you punch him, you'd have to punch his face because punches to the body from normal men would be ineffective and I know for a fact he has a glass chin. It's heavily covered by adipose tissue but I assure you it's there.

I will not eat a single morsel of food until anominous threatens Patrick with violence.

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Since you're newer here, I'll let you in on something: @AnOminous is very resistant to being told what to do or even be loved. I'm not even talking gay-sex-like-you'll-clap-those-cheeks-good type love. More like you-think-he's-funny-and-want-to-be-KF-pals type love. Try all you want but he's always like, "Fuck no!"

"I have gay friends who could lose their jobs now simply because of who they love." (Pat on about Roe v Wade)
That isn't what RvW was about, mouth breather.
And people being fired for being gay didn't happen, did it Pat? Just like none of the fearmongering that Leftists lose their shit over never happens.


Imma double post to explain to Pat that real life is not the same as your shitty Hulu D&D ripoffs. Broadswords are not big and heavy like in a videogame.

I know @Procrastinhater just mentioned this, but you think someone who is desperate to be a vaunted member of SFWA would know something about fucking swords of all things.

That guy on that YouTube channel appears to know swords, fencing, and video presentation well. It's interesting watching some of his stuff.

You'd think a supposed hard sci-fi author would understand how retarded comparing size and weight when it comes to a sword that is composed of 90% energy. A lightsaber isn't suddenly heavier or more defensive because you add a pointless crossguard to it.

I agree with you on how a blade made of energy, no matter how long or what shape, wouldn't change the weight of a lightsaber but anything added to the hilt would at least change the mass of that. Unless you mean something different.

Fuck, I shouldn't consume caffeine and then post on here.