🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

[Blue Miaplacidus]

His opus magnum soon to be released. He is the Shakespeare of our times.
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I mean has anyone ever read any of his diary posts without the sole intent of making fun of him? Why does he do this to himself, lol. I'm sure there's many people just hanging on waiting for Ethan Ralph's livejournal post about how he's actually not a retard.

Funny how after nearly an entire decade things are still exactly the same, writing articles about how the woman he was abusing left him for being a drunken deadbeat but he lost 5lbs and he's actually a really good guy.

lots of gold in this blog post

Archive

 

[Look--an Alien!]

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lots of gold in this blog post
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Archive

LMAO he uses those motivational quote images that divorced, middle aged white women use on Facebook. "You're STRONK and SEEN and BOOTYFUL"

He really IS a woman

 

[Not Even Twice]

His opus magnum soon to be released. He is the Shakespeare of our times.
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Every time this pathetic sack of fat has relationship issues he writes "his best piece so far" - and it always reads like the ramblings of a 13 year old spoiled child.

I wonder how many "actually"s, "to be quite honest with you"s and "as a matter of fact"s there will be in this drivel.

 

[Blue Miaplacidus]

LMAO he uses those motivational quote images that divorced, middle aged white women use on Facebook. "You're STRONK and SEEN and BOOTYFUL"

He really IS a woman

It really is hilarious, he also posted this which is even more funny.

Dude is equating himself to Rocky Balboa because his first ever girlfriend got tired of him hitting her and being a drunk deadbeat and left.

 

[Rage Pig]

Now we are up to 6000 words.

 

[Elmo]

Now we are up to 6000 words.
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Can't wait for the audiobook. Talking to himself is always a good sign.

 

[Trigger Me Timbers]

He really IS a woman

Ethan Ralph is a single mother. If you look at they way he writes and the way he talks, you can tell that he was raised by single mother and had almost 0 positive male role models in his life. The fact that he’s never mentioned any male role models outside of his birth father, who dipped when he was like baby and it was not a very nice person kinda explains it all.

He was raised by a single mother.
He has created single mothers.
He is a single mother.

 

[Wine em Dine em 69 em]

Ethan Ralph is a single mother. If you look at they way he writes and the way he talks, you can tell that he was raised by single mother and had almost 0 positive male role models in his life. The fact that he’s never mentioned any male role models outside of his birth father, who dipped when he was like baby and it was not a very nice person kinda explains it all.

He was raised by a single mother.
He has created single mothers.
He is a single mother.

He really is a woman, even having the most womanly of personality disorders.
Embrace your inner two-time divorcée Ralph and start slapping word signs from Michaels all over Casa de Verde Merde. (Is he still there?) Here’s some examples for inspiration.

 

[UCantCCPMe]

I swear, I have too much fun with Tweetgen

 

[Cringestorian X]

oh he's going to release a book ?

https://ghostarchive.org/archive/Mg7eV

what it is going to be called chyat ?

How To Get Away With Revenge Porn Charges
Fear and Loathing in Merida

also a picture of his cat smoke

 

[Blue Miaplacidus]

again referencing my post above, a decade has passed and everything is exactly the same, still talking about his book.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

How desperate is Ralph getting that he is resorting to writing his “life story” just to milk the alog market?

The small amount of unironic fans Ralph might have don’t read or own books. Even comic books are pushing the bounds of their intellect and attention span.

Lol, at Ralph trying to source a publisher on Twitter. He should go ahead and source a literary agent while he’s at it.

Few more beers and xanies and he’LL upload the whole magnum opus tonight.

 

[Wine em Dine em 69 em]

oh he's going to release a book ?
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https://ghostarchive.org/archive/Mg7eV

what it is going to be called chyat ?

How To Get Away With Revenge Porn Charges
Fear and Loathing in Merida

also a picture of his cat smoke
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Ralph-‘I’m pretty sure it would sell, at least modestly, maybe more.’
Also Ralph-

Do it Ralph. It’s the best idea you’ve ever had.
Make sure you put on that affected 7th grader writing style you use in all your written efforts to date. Spend at least 45% of the book talking about Gamer Gaye. Don’t take more than a paragraph to describe how you detoxed yourself off of a massive amount of Xanax, alone and without medical intervention, in less than two weeks. Oh god it’s going to be dreary childhood bullshit about his mama and meemaw and pawpaw isn’t it, how is he going to write about the ‘good stuff’ when he cannot accept responsibility for anything.

 

[Blue Miaplacidus]

Also Ralph-

Him buying himself that dumb ass bowling trophy will never not be hilarious, it's almost satirical but he was dead serious. He legitimately bought himself and awarded himself a trophy.

 

[Fornicario]

Who is his chief of staff? Andrew Tate? Ronnie?

 

[Capt. Jean Luc Ritard]

Ralph-‘I’m pretty sure it would sell, at least modestly, maybe more.’
Also Ralph-
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Do it Ralph. It’s the best idea you’ve ever had.
Make sure you put on that affected 7th grader writing style you use in all your written efforts to date. Spend at least 45% of the book talking about Gamer Gaye. Don’t take more than a paragraph to describe how you detoxed yourself off of a massive amount of Xanax, alone and without medical intervention, in less than two weeks. Oh god it’s going to be dreary childhood bullshit about his mama and meemaw and pawpaw isn’t it, how is he going to write about the ‘good stuff’ when he cannot accept responsibility for anything.

Also go into extensive details of your enemies and all of their transgressions and talk about a bunch of nonsense internet drama only like 30 of your payouts care about.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

Who is his chief of staff? Andrew Tate? Ronnie?

His make-believe best buddy? His cat smoke? Maybe an undercover alog because that’s the only human who would be egging Ralph on to publish his biography tonight.

It’s Friday night and Ralph is alone and drunk in his 3rd world AirBnB. He’s got nothing else to do but wallow in his past “glory”.

 

[Johnny Doxville]

How desperate is Ralph getting that he is resorting to writing his “life story” just to milk the alog market?

Let's be very fucking real, any alog with their salt would buy a copy and upload an archived copy it of DCMA reach.

Subsequent meltdown from ragepig getting laughed at for free will be excellent.

Bonus points if they don't give their dox to ralph

 

[Bland Crumbs]

oh he's going to release a book ?
View attachment 5325219
https://ghostarchive.org/archive/Mg7eV

what it is going to be called chyat ?

How To Get Away With Revenge Porn Charges
Fear and Loathing in Merida

also a picture of his cat smoke
View attachment 5325222

Ralph is a terrible writer, an incompetent storyteller, and has no audience. No one is going to publish his ramblings because about twenty people would buy it.

That said it would be hilarious to watch him brag about all the publishers he sent his opus to and was waiting for a response.

 

[Salvatore Leone]

oh he's going to release a book ?
View attachment 5325219
https://ghostarchive.org/archive/Mg7eV

what it is going to be called chyat ?

How To Get Away With Revenge Porn Charges
Fear and Loathing in Merida

also a picture of his cat smoke
View attachment 5325222

Not the first time he’s teased writing a book. Maybe he will have a middle section of the book with images from his life and maybe a full gunt profile since he’s a whore now.