Kevin Gibes / Kathryn Gibes / TransSalamander / RageTreb / The Green Salamander - "Am hole:" The epitomized Twitter MtF you thought was just a myth! Donate to his Transformers toy fund today!

Flamin Park said:
Did I miss something? How does kev have shelter experience? I thought his only experience of work was selling furry porn
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I’m wondering that too… now if I recall my super deep kevvie lore…. Didn’t his ex fiancée work at a shelter? I’m pretty sure tho they met when both working at Disney land and I have a feeling Kevin only did that job…

I know Kevin’s preferred bean based tacos, I know his hatrid for biological women, and I even know which M&M he would fuck and in what order…. But I don’t know if he worked at a hecking valid Pupperino gas chamber.

Edit:
Ooohhhhh I get it, they misunderstood. Keven has sheltered experience. Not shelter experience.
 
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AirdropShitposts said:
Always love a good reveal about Kevin being a passive aggressive bully to anyone he thinks is weaker than him and can't fight back.
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It's always the most hilariously jarring with Kevin who tries to present as a friendly uwu bean and folds at the slightest bit of bullying online. A paper tiger, he's almost the IRL version of a bad guy's toadie in a tv show.


And now I'm remembering how he has no plans to grow old or die, and is instead literally hoping really hard that life prolonging medicine or brain uploading happens so he can be alive forever and be young forever.
 
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Kiwi bros... apparently @Stupid Sexy Flanders writes degenerate Kevin lust fanatic when drunk (enough to deeply concern me actually.... and maybe scar me for life I now check if a long post is written by Flanders before reading and skip it mostly if so... you do have a liver man maybe consider its continued existence)

And I sit here and drunkenly ponder how the hell "current year" is so damn fucked.

I just sit here realizing that even paying my own medical insurance out of pocket i can't get needs met without spending thousands out of pocket. Much less wants...

Kevin gets all the toys he wants and plastic surgery on demand, I get bills and chronic pain.

And this fucker has the audacity to complain about his existence of hug box and gibs.

Is our reality just Hell and this is our punishment for sins in a past life? Doomed to watch cows squander more money than most of us will ever see, more goodwill than we can dream of, and rarely if ever get their comeuppance? I'm pretty sure Kevie has spent more on toys in the past 3 years than idk. I have on clothes. Or food. Maybe both?

Then again I haven't chopped of parts of my body and reconfigured them for the lolz so I guess I'm still ahead?

Yeah its time for more drinking.

But unrelatedly did anyone ever guess at his monthly toy spend and also..what lizard?
 
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TooManyKittens said:
Is our reality just Hell and this is our punishment for sins in a past life? Doomed to watch cows squander more money than most of us will ever see, more goodwill than we can dream of, and rarely if ever get their comeuppance?
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Fren, they get their comeuppance quite regularly. They are miserable and angry at everyone else for their being miserable by choice. They don't appreciate anything except themselves and their existence is spent being able to focus only on how the reality of themselves falls short of their pathetic dreams. They're every trope of creepy angry dudes, they're so socially stunted they create autistic "relationships" out of standard friendships and brag about their inability to interact with anyone. They're unhealthy and unclean and trying to be proud of it. Don't focus on what you would do with these things, focus on what they do with them. Either sit them on a shelf in preparation of the next one or not care for it in any way and destroy it. You can be happy, they cannot. You can love others, they cannot. You can theoretically have sex, Kevin can not.
 
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TooManyKittens said:
Kevin gets all the toys he wants and plastic surgery on demand, I get bills and chronic pain.
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Consider this: He gets all the gibs and plastic surgery in exchange for having zero healthy relationships with friends or family, no stable or clean place to live, and he can no longer coom. This guy acts horny when he can't even get off anymore. He also smokes a bunch of weed in order to numb the panic attacks he gets when reality comes crashing down.

Idk, I'd rather have chronic pain and miss out on begging for cheap plastic junk in exchange for keeping my happy and healthy relationships, a safe and clean living environment, and functional genitals.
 
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TooManyKittens said:
Is our reality just Hell and this is our punishment for sins in a past life? Doomed to watch cows squander more money than most of us will ever see, more goodwill than we can dream of, and rarely if ever get their comeuppance? I'm pretty sure Kevie has spent more on toys in the past 3 years than idk. I have on clothes. Or food. Maybe both?
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Kevin is a eunuch living on multiple different levels of denial with a crotch that is always hurting and has removed his sex drive (but can't sa it online). His "lovers"/best friends are a shit eater with an eating disorder and a hair trigger reee on hating christians, and a man divorced twice who left behind 2 kids now acting as his dominatrix; the man with half his teeth, a terrible grasp on business, pet hoarder, who dragged you out to the middle of nowhere where you couldn't play video games all day, a retard temper and a need for control, and more guns than sense. He is stuck with them because their personality perfectly complements his ans all of them enable each other's addictions without ever improving; hedonist in the moment and self loathing the rest od the time. His friends all consist of shallow on and off relationships, there's no one he really has deep feelings for aside from the occassional infatuation and "everyone betray me!" rage. He has no job, no job prospects, no way to make money aside from attempting to ebeg which is boring (we still don't know where Kevvie's money comes from, credit cards are my guess), his only type of personal growth is social media likes and followers go up teehee and collecting... forever.

His health, diet, and hygine habits are abysmal and contribute to the state of his body and skin. He is easily butthurt and can be set off by someone touching his Hi-C or by trying to shove a MtG card into a sleeve with his big meaty hands (then breaking it in tardrage). He folds like a house of cards when challenged by someone he likes or is kissing the ass of. He can't even challenge his mom, he talked big game before meeting her, meekly talked to her and agreed with her because of his guilt and people pleasing, then bitched about her gaslighting or whatever online since he can't talk like a regular human. He does not shop sales, he buys on forced impulse. He cannot drive, he must rely on others for freedom. He has created several bitter ends with "friends" like wedge, Vulpis, and others due to his own shallowness and refusal to change. He never graduated emotionally from 2nd grade, and even 2nd graders have more empathy and willingness to change than him, biting him in the ass and forcing him to live in his world of denial bliss.

This man is a societal dropout and a retarded toadie. Hardly anyone likes him, his personality and meaning is an empty void he tries to numb constantly, he's thick as a brick and too stubborn to change, and his entire future is in the hands of "Kill all TERFs, landlords, and alpacas" Penny who can't plan a goddamn thing and who's own health is failing, no parachute for KevKev. The reason it feels like he gets no comuppance is because his life is a constant series of Ls he chooses to blissfully ignore, nearing Chris-chan levels of copium ignorance. We only see his retard musings and have to infer from those, his friends' words, his former friends' words, the occassional tranch news article (which had faded), and photos and videos the tranchers upload. He is likely in pain and dulls it a lot with weed and perhaps other drug usage.

Chronic pain is a fucking bitch as is navigating pain management. The healthcare system is not kind or easy. Physical pain clouds the mind, and it's easy to lose sight of things to be thankful for, especially in rougher times. Your emotional pain is warrented, but clouds your judgement. There's so many lolcows that live in De Nile (goddamn white colonizers) who have only their vices and bullying of others to escape into. The best description I heard of DarkSydePhil is that he is "successful in life, but not successful at life", referring to his constant misery. This applies to several other cows with seemingly decent finances and living situations. Their hell is emotional and personal, and when you're in pain and tired as fuck from dealing with money and insurance issues, any life that's seemingly easier is better.

Life is hard. Suffering inevitable and painful. But your self awareness, willingness to change, deeper emotions than a child, and likely better relationships makes you richer in life than Kevin. His hell only seems nice from the outside due to his protective blubber of denial insulating him. You got a shit situation you have to manage, but you are not taking the metric fuckton of Ls Kevvie does by existing and have many more chances and opportunities than him. You suffer, but likely have a better community than him even if it's one or two people who actually fucking care about you as a person as you do them. Anger at Kevin is natural (he's just so fucking stupid), but remember his Ls and do your best to be good to yourself. You will do better in life than Kevin as long as you choose to move forward.

Happy late Thanksgiving if you're in America friend, and hope the next year brings better news. :heart-full:
 
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I, too, was very confused by the lizard thing, but I wrote it off - my logic being "if he had/has a lizard, it's definitely as good as dead."

I bet he adopted a cat from a shelter before: et voila, shelter experience.

We don't really know anything about the state of Kevvy's finances and how he can "afford" all those toys. I am not convinced he's not deeply in debt - all of them, possibly - and it's really not a flex to have ten billion plastic robots when you also have zero material or skilled means to stay alive long enough to get TO the singularity (his stated plan). Times are shit all around, most of us are stretching our money more than ever and that itself is a skill Kevvy doesn't have. He spends every penny he has on Chinese shit in boxes.

But if/when Penny suddenly dies of silent heart disease caused by his rotten teeth and Jen succumbs to Marfan syndrome's notoriously shorter lifespan, Kevvy will have literally nothing. Not even the skills to work at Walmart, as they won't let him have a weed and fortnight break because the cis white guy chortled at him while walking in the door. He has zero exit strategy - only to be cared for like a small child forever or die in a ditch.

If ever you feel angry for everything Kevvy "has," just remember what he doesn't have - which is any ability to care for himself. He's like a spoiled consumptive Victorian child for all intents and purposes.
 
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The Silent Perjority said:
[AMHOLIO WROTE, DEVASTATINGLY]
Kevin...
[]


Fuck.

Let's never fall out eh Am?
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My secret is that I don't like being mean, but I can be. Kevin is someone I know peripherally for a long time, so I can be particular when I'm mean about him. :D

You're a nice guy with a good wit who can get MATI but because you care about something rather than butthurt over nothing. I think you'll be just fine. :heart-full:

Cows are mean people with mean little hearts and souls, who's main trait is that they refuse to change their behavior for the better. They stick themselves in their own hells and I think they're just fine to be mean to. Most farmers are flawed human beings, but flawed, not irredeemable. They're harsher on themselves because what their flaws are and can see themselves in the cows. I think being nice to other kiwis and people in general is the good idea, and there's few monumental fuck ups like Mr. Gibes that need to be bullied. So I wouldn't worry about it. :heart-full:

The Judean People's Front said:
I, too, was very confused by the lizard thing, but I wrote it off - my logic being "if he had/has a lizard, it's definitely as good as dead."
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Same. @AnOminous let me get you your pills, grandpa.
 
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TRANCHGIVING: THE FEAST OF THE AMHOLE​

@Lidl Drip had always dreamt of having a retarded baby. You see, this is because she's female and loves to have empathy for all living things, plus finally show those skanks Stacey and Becky who's the most empathic of them all. She prayed all day and night for the stork to bring her a retarded child, one that she could love and abuse in equal measure in a true Barb-Chan fashion. She had been really good all year after all, hating on men and praying to her Ever-Lord Magdalen Berns. As Thanksgiving came and went she was left with a wish bone - and she prayed extra hard that this time she was going to get her womanly desires! As she went to bed that night she cried. Because she's a woman.

As she woke up the next morning she smelt a particularly foul odour. She followed it curiously and it appeared to come from her front door. Could it be...? She opened the door excitingly and saw... a creature. A blob. What is it?

"GAA-GAA-GOO-GOO" the obese man cried. "I am KATHRYN, your baby."

"OH DEAR LORD WHAT IT THIS", @Lidl Drip cried out. This was definitively not what she wanted, but maybe she could salvage the situation?

"I GO PEE-PEE AND POO-POO IN MY DIAPERS TEEEHEEE", the shapeless man gurgled as @Lidl Drip heard something move in the bushes, clearly attracted by the words spoken by this... monster. @Lidl Drip knew what she had to do - something she had seen in a The Sims hack, since that's the only game women play.

She dragged the unfortunate amoeba like man into her kitchen. It was time. Carefully she used her womanly skills to chop up vegetables - sweet onion, celery, garlic! Better add the butter to make it extra creamy and of course there's the bread crumbs. She grabbed the disgusting man's diaper and threw it out the window - outside she heard someone... something crunching on it. Never mind that! @Lidl Drip knew the next step would be the hardest challenge she would have to face in her entire life!!! She grabbed her lovingly made stuffing and stuffed it into the... amhole. It was a sacrifice to all mankind, but had to be done. The man moaned, giggled and said: "Lesbian lust is forever!"

Disgusted @Lidl Drip opened the oven and tried to shove the man in... unfortunately, he wouldn't fit so she had to take the cleaver out. Like a maniac she started chip-chopping him up until he fit! She didn't even hear his screams. She didn't even care anymore. She realised her biggest fault of all: female empathy.

As she turned the oven up charcoal she promised herself to never ever try to be an empathic human being towards men ever again. She picked up her phone and texted to her TERF friends: "Feast is done in about four hours, come on over!" as the Shania Twain song started playing.

Happy belated Tranchgiving my 'murican frens!
 
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AMHOLIO said:
He is easily butthurt and can be set off by someone touching his Hi-C or by trying to shove a MtG card into a sleeve with his big meaty hands (then breaking it in tardrage). He folds like a house of cards when challenged by someone he likes or is kissing the ass of. He can't even challenge his mom, he talked big game before meeting her, meekly talked to her and agreed with her because of his guilt and people pleasing, then bitched about her gaslighting or whatever online since he can't talk like a regular human. He does not shop sales, he buys on forced impulse. He cannot drive, he must rely on others for freedom. He has created several bitter ends with "friends" like wedge, Vulpis, and others due to his own shallowness and refusal to change. He never graduated emotionally from 2nd grade, and even 2nd graders have more empathy and willingness to change than him, biting him in the ass and forcing him to live in his world of denial bliss.
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Way to ignore how this is everyone else's, especially the unqueers, fault. If Kevin has a flaw, any flaw at all, it's that he's too much of a slut and the unqueers resent that.

That's it. You all hate him because of how jealous you are. This is what you fascists never learn and why community action will be your downfall as always. You don't have to be jealous, you can let go of the hate and become a dumb bimbo slut too. Except you're too afraid to challenge the patriarchy like Kevin, that's why everyone is laughing at you pathetic losers.
 
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