DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell: General Discussion #2

[Soylent Dora]

I guess Phil is like every other streamer after all:

 

[Freebird]

Phil got into a match, quit it and said there has been a development, muted his mic and dipped. Did Khet sit of Jasper?

Phil pooped his pants (Source: I made it up)

 

[Agent Proper]

He is now quitting the stream and claiming "Someone" is messing with him. Strange.

 

[FaXmachine]

He is now quitting the stream and claiming "Someone" is messing with him. Strange.

Phils gonna get them with his tiny hatchet lol.

 

[Freebird]

"Basically, someone is messing with me and what I have to do is look into it so I can't stream right now, I gotta get outta here" 14:57 timestamp

"Basically, I got some stuff to do, I gotta take care of it. I'm hoping, that tonight I'll be back for a late stream, we'll see"
"I can't really let you know what's going on until I figure all this out" Translation: he has no fucking idea either
" Sorry, I know, super annoying, very stupid but that's life, that's my life I deal with every day, so now I gotta deal with this."
Edit: "Now people say 'well he's begging'"

"Can I do push ups? No."
And then it hit him. As he looked at the COD match that had just begun, DSP thought to himself "Why can't I do push ups? Why am I playing Call of Duty?", DSP saw the error of his ways and he remembered his DDR Yoga DVD set he spent too much money on. With this newly acquired knowledge, he himself personally, had a development of his will. The years of bringing him down, the harassment and torture trolls have been giving him? Useless, ineffective against the trained might of a narcissist. The question "Can you do push ups?" was the thing that broke him. Why couldn't we have asked this 16 years ago? Shame on us.

Alternative path: The question "Can you do push ups?" activated sleeper agent Phil86 and he will now go out to assassinate the target.

 

[BPD Gunt Rider]

"Someone is messing with him" and "He has very stupid stuff to deal with" that threatens tonight's stream. Smells like fake drama which he's probably been doing lately, and conveniently for a messed up internet stream again.

 

[Big Brown Schlub]

Gets $57 in tips yesterday and suddenly he's being attacked and is fishing for victimbux. Almond status: Activated.

 

[Polska krowa]

"Basically, someone is messing with me and what I have to do is look into it so I can't stream right now, I gotta get outta here" 14:57 timestamp

"Basically, I got some stuff to do, I gotta take care of it. I'm hoping, that tonight I'll be back for a late stream, we'll see"
"I can't really let you know what's going on until I figure all this out" Translation: he has no fucking idea either
" Sorry, I know, super annoying, very stupid but that's life, that's my life I deal with every day, so now I gotta deal with this."View attachment 5526040

Finally, all my praying on his downfall has borne fruit.

 

[Corpun]

Phil: My mukbang video corrupted when I was filming it. Can't edit with the stream because those dumbfuck morons at YouTube didn't program their editing software to handle 10 hour long videos. This is proof edited content is a pain.

Too lazy to even install a fucking video editing program to get his fucking ad revenue, needed to go to his totally not real discord and ask a dent to pull it out for him.

I really fucking hate his take that doing a sponsorship makes any content inauthentic and fake. It's so evident he is just jealous and malding over the fact no one gives him a sponsorship because he is untouchable, and he has too much of a fucking ego because he convinced himself people who do sponsorships are posers. In Phil's mind, someone like Internet Historian or literally any independent journalist is a fraud because they got an ad deal from NordVPN or DollarShave club or some shit.

Also he is a paranoid, delusional motherfucker who absolutely hates the idea of having some sort of 'boss' or person in charge, even if it's literally just some HR person giving him a script over a fucking email.

Catching up with Proper, had a backlog of shit but holy fuckin lol.
View attachment 5523750

Give that hair up Phil, it is a lost cause.

lets see whats phils watching on dspreacts today.. oh
View attachment 5523976

Derich-style recomendation.

Like you’re saying “maybe he’s a huge slob” we don’t need a fucking maybe, we know his is, he doesn’t keep his own room where he makes money clean, his entertainment stand has been repeatedly shown to be covered in dust at times, he often looks like he hasn’t taken a damn shower. Slob is one of the most easily identifiable things about Phil

On top of that he is a massive fucking horder. There is probably all sorts of useless junk in that condo collecting dust. We know from the CT days he filled that place with stupid statues and toys he never tossed. We know that the closet he 'cleaned' was filled with junk and is now filled with more junk that should be tossed. The fucking statues are in some closet somewhere in the house because he was too lazy to sell them. All those blu-rays he has a wall of were impulse buys and he doesn't even know how many duplicates he has because he never watched half of them.

 

[FamicomGorby]

Only other time I remember Dave abandoning the stream suddenly, with basically no explanation, was when he found out about the bank leaks discord server leaks. Probably not what happened here, but could be he got a message that he felt he had to deal with immediately. It would have to be something big though, like Papa Burnell had a heart attack or Leanna messaged him that Keemstar was fuckin her. When that pic of Kat came out and everyone posted "KAT IS FAT" in the stream chat he just plowed right past it.

I really fucking hate his take that doing a sponsorship makes any content inauthentic and fake. It's so evident he is just jealous and malding over the fact no one gives him a sponsorship because he is untouchable, and he has too much of a fucking ego because he convinced himself people who do sponsorships are posers. In Phil's mind, someone like Internet Historian or literally any independent journalist is a fraud because they got an ad deal from NordVPN or DollarShave club or some shit.

Dood, having a two minute ad read is totally the same as begging constantly, *snort* sound good?

 

[Radical Goodspeed]

My god, I hope we're entering the stage I predicted years ago but never thought would come to pass: Phil is now holding turning the camera on hostage, for tips.

 

[Negative Toxic Loser]

In my head canon, Phil is just calling Comcast support, requesting a call center manager just to scream and snort at them that there is a filthy detractor CAE accessing his account to reset his modem.

Edit:

That good bye has the same vibe as Cyraxx shitting himself and saying it's storming out.

 

[Thefrogsaregay]

"Mr. President, a plane has flown into the second modem."

 

[Mr.PiggyOinkOinkOinkOink]

saw someone on twitter say somoene ordered a bunch of pizzas to his house lmao

 

[Hectic Heckler]

saw someone on twitter say somoene ordered a bunch of pizzas to his house lmao

Phil panics while the Fhet Khet is excited!

 

[Amanda Byrnes]

saw someone on twitter say somoene ordered a bunch of pizzas to his house lmao

That's some old-school shit lol. If someone only thought of that now and pulled it off, that's hilarious.

If these rumors are true let's hope it was Pizza Hut so he can't even eat it cause its not authentic Italian style

 

[Fuckyoudad]

DSP having to let a tride in to fix his sink was a big drama for him. NO way he ever lets someone film him outside 'work hours'. He'd have a million excuses, hes too busy to working to have someone in the house, jasper (his son & family) wouldn't like it, Kat (his wife and horse) said no, 'you can see what im doing anyway dood via the stream'.
DSP would HAVE to be really secretive with his WWE pulls if it did happen which is the main reason why it never would, imagine how many bathroom breaks hed have to have and hide all the gin he drinks.
Never ever is he letting someone other than a tradie enter the pigfort

He's never honest with himself thus he'll never find himself able to be honest with anyone else either. I'm not sure he truly even understands what honesty actually means. He shapes his own version of the truth around the delusion that reality is a scam because it never bent to his dimwitted will so he's been forced to fight fire with fire against an endless horde of fakeass paid shills when the hateful trooth is that's all he's ever dreamed of being.

There are 101 obstacles in phil's path that he's not even interested in acknowledging exist nevermind trying to find a way around them. The way you just described him trying to prepare for an outsider taking control of the show is a perfect summary of why no one could ever expect anything beyond more obfuscation. He's still eating way too good and way too comfortable to be introduced naked in his (busted) bathtub talking about women or powerwalking shirtless to collect his mail so we can clap eyes on that ex-bodybuilder physique

Things might have been a bit different had the sidescrollers not run a train on him. It took the combination of whale bailing(?) and a more pronounced imbalance of greed and desparation for him to work up the nerve to do that show with them. I don't think it's an exaggeration to say it was in its own way years in the making. He finally opened himself up to some level of scrutiny when it was obvious he was anticipating softballs all afternoon. It only helped to confirm his fears even if his expectations were warped to fit an interview with DSP 2011 and not DSP 2023.

At the same time that interview betrayed his own intentions as well by presenting him as someone who's so desperate to be accepted and fixated upon that he's willing to sit there and be bullied for hours if he thinks it will evenually lead to being able to blend into a pre-approved crowd again a la FGC. The qualifier can't be negative though eventhough that's all his life appears to be. He has a shifting and illusory set of standards he must hold himself to. If detractors even artificially softened upon him and played the role of comeback supporters I bet he'd actually end up working with them but if he can't control all the khantext like vince mcmahon then fuck you dood.


TDLR Phil would need final cut rights over any documentary and no "filmmaker" worth their salt would ever grant them to him so any real interview is DOA.

 

[detractorzer0]

Phil panics while the Fhet Khet is excited!

Katt tried to scarf it down before he noticed. No evidence, no crime.

 

[King of Hateful Slurs]

 

[Ching_Chong]

View attachment 5526206

Oh wow, it was a total nothingburger.