Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[p1138]

Bro what
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Even the vegan meat stuff costs more than normal meat, and the lab grown stuff would cost a fortune and can't be produced any any sort of scale. wtf would anyone be secretly using either?

 

[Falcon Sebben]

A lot of strip mall type Chinese have a "house soup" that is literally that, but they charge extra for it, assholes. Bibimbap can be like that, but a lot of places just have a fixed recipe and it's that every time. That's also something I used to eat nearly every day.

That's always been what "Soup of the day" is. It's often times the leftovers from yesterday that they need to use up and throw it into a soup. It's also why if you go out to eat the "Chef's Special" or "Daily Special" is whatever they got for cheap and need to unload or it's what is going to expire soon so they need to use it up before then.

Bro what
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Or third option... it's not commercially available or cost effective enough for people to serve it.

Why do these people have a binary attitude towards everything. No shades of gray allowed. Only one absolute or the other.

Even the vegan meat stuff costs more than normal meat, and the lab grown stuff would cost a fortune and can't be produced any any sort of scale. wtf would anyone be secretly using either?

Since when do conspiritards make sense?

 

[That Damned Tiger]

Bro what
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What a regard.

 

[Sonic T]

Object permanence as applied to boomer fear-progaganda: A discussion.

You mean [OBJ] permanence

 

[lindsayfan]

this guy can barely talk anymore. gonna be jack-in-the-box any day now.

tammy: "i'm gonna try the callamurray"
jack: "ogey. ib dat kallmaree?"
(camera shakily spirals closer until food is blurry)
"dass but chee tribe, ry dere"

jack petulantly getting his side of pork belly is hilarious. also back in the car he calls the octopus "squid." fucking dummy.

this restaurant looked a lot better than their usual slop. of course it's only a b+ because they didn't serve him a pound of bacon. he'd rather be back at the patriot-prayer gas station sandwich counter where they just stack 18 oz of processed walmart lunchmeat on a slab of bunny bread. who cares if it's all still cold from the refrigerator, meat gud

 

[Gulls on Film]

Bro what
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Ah, so Tammy directs his scooty-puff away from the vegetarian section at supermarkets so she doesn't have to listen to him rant about fake meat anymore.

 

[AnOminous]

this restaurant looked a lot better than their usual slop.

Of course it was still strip-mall Japanese. That's usually a cut above strip-mall chinkslop, but it's hardly high end, and was hardly high priced.

 

[densedance]

Yeah, well I guess.

 

[Bassomatic]

As much as we all love watching Jack flounder/sink in sanity and health this was painful to watch.

It's eerie like one of those videos of a guy still on PCP in an integration room where the cop is explaining "you ripped your dad's lungs out and tried to fuck a Buick" and the guy is too busy worried about his shoe laces.

The difference here it's the Wendigo need of meat and the bag of fat jack is trying to review flavors and nuance is just ruled over by the beasts hunger.

I gave the secret warning signs for Tam Jr she didn't use it... Poor girl Wendigo got her too. Soon she's going to have her own death fat thread.

Jacks hunting.... As an avid hunter and eater of what I kill. I could go past total a log. But I'll spare it the worst burn I could muster... Is nothing next to what he did to that meat.

 

[Pizza Munch]

This is what living with the Scalfatties does to a person.

Maybe I’m giving her too much credit, but I sympathize with Brianna. She not only is surrounded by the scalfanis 24/7, she also had a health scare that required some form of brain surgery. Also growing up not having to worry about what you eat as a teen can catch up to you real quick- something I’m sure many young adults can relate to. Idk she just seems like a sweet girl and never gave cow vibes to me (besides choosing to marry one).

As an aside- Jack showed a brief instance of self awareness in that ramen video.. “..I could have cooked it myself, nah wait not really”

 

[Kuritan Deplorable]

Maybe I’m giving her too much credit, but I sympathize with Brianna. She not only is surrounded by the scalfanis 24/7, she also had a health scare that required some form of brain surgery. Also growing up not having to worry about what you eat as a teen can catch up to you real quick- something I’m sure many young adults can relate to. Idk she just seems like a sweet girl and never gave cow vibes to me (besides choosing to marry one).

As an aside- Jack showed a brief instance of self awareness in that ramen video.. “..I could have cooked it myself, nah wait not really”

Jack making Ramen would be a nightmare, especially if he insisted on doing the broth properly. Its something like twelve hours at a full boil with the pork bones, to get it right. I've had 2-3 hour broths and they're fucking garbage, not even worth bothering. The only part he'd probably get right is the pork belly, because a very fatty one is a perfectly valid way to make it. Pretty sure that takes a while too though.

knowing jacks impatience, it'd be a complete wreck.

 

[biggacracka]

Jack making Ramen would be a nightmare, especially if he insisted on doing the broth properly. Its something like twelve hours at a full boil with the pork bones, to get it right. I've had 2-3 hour broths and they're fucking garbage, not even worth bothering. The only part he'd probably get right is the pork belly, because a very fatty one is a perfectly valid way to make it. Pretty sure that takes a while too though.

knowing jacks impatience, it'd be a complete wreck.

He'd throw everything at once in a wifi/bluetooth slowcooker he's "reviewing" and undercook everything to hell while still overcooking the ramen noodles themselves and pretend it's "amazing"

 

[MS Paint Gigachad]

RAMEN SPERG TIME!
First up: I've never seen spicy edamame before. Most places I know serve it plain with just salt afaik. Almost seems like an americanism

The chashu bun seems like a crossover from chinese cooking. Go google "gua bao". That being said, I don't really consider it to be an abomination, since the chinese version doesnt seem too different? The tonkatsu bun though, on the other hand... that's definitely a bigger divergence from the original

> tendon ramen
Firstly, it feels like the americans just mashed together tendon (which is tempura over rice) and ramen. They could've called it "tempura ramen" instead but it really feels like I'm being a linguistic sperg for nitpicking this. And secondly, just why? the soup will instantly de-crisp the tempura.
> cheese ramen
☪. Unlike the korean implementation of this (where they use spicy/sour broth) which contrasts with the cheese, this feels like it'd be an overly-rich mess.

> kimchi ramen
Definitely feeling the american East-Asia-Amorph-ization here lol. might work though.

> wagyu ramen
someone said they don't trust it. Yeah, I agree.

As for the ramen itself, it looks pretty good. The broth looks a bit pale, but I usually do black/garlic ramen so that might just be my personal expectations talking.

Jack making Ramen would be a nightmare, especially if he insisted on doing the broth properly. Its something like twelve hours at a full boil with the pork bones, to get it right. I've had 2-3 hour broths and they're fucking garbage, not even worth bothering.

I've brewed tonkotsu broth myself, several times before. I hardly do it anymore, since it takes like 12 hours of boiling (and I mean with bubbles forming and shit) pork trotters (Not just bones. You have to have the skin and cartilage for collagen to be extracted into the broth) and and am thus more than happy to outsource it to my local restaurants. It also takes at least 6 hours to get any appreciable amount of collagen.

Why is this PL relevant? Because I know that if you clean the pork (which is to say, simmer it for about 30 minutes to get the blood and stuff out (which I have no doubt jack will skip, whether out of sloth or incompetence)), the broth is a near-white cream-beige colour. So, yeah, it looks pale, as it should be, and I dont hold it against them.

You're a man of good taste for getting black garlic ramen, though.

The only part he'd probably get right is the pork belly, because a very fatty one is a perfectly valid way to make it. Pretty sure that takes a while too though.

It absolutely does. I've done it too, I feel like it takes at least an hour in the slow cooker. That said, I have, at times, felt like doing it with a leaner cut, lest (in the words of the illustrious @AnOminous ) I swell up like chairman Mao

 

[Doctor of Autism]

7:20 Noodles were bland. Broth was amazing. Service was amazing. "the prices were a little bit much for ramen. I could have made the same... well probably not there was some seafood in there I don't normally cook up" Seafood was great, lot of high points. "the bummer is they're not advertising much because I never heard about this place" I can't imagine Fatty looks up restaurants, other than maybe what he sees advertised on a roadside billboard.

I'm pretty sure with noodles, the flavor mostly comes from the broth.

Lol tho at the thought of Jack making Ramen.

 

[EatBeforeYouEat]

Jack cares about his health and weight, avoiding another stroke

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In comments under this post Jack responded to someone mentioning that they got this from a local butcher. I am no hunter but that implies that Charles shot and wounded a deer but they were never able to track it down. Makes sense since Jagoff is the type of guy who would have insisted on taking a trophy-hunting pic with the corpse. Anyways, for the poor animal's sake I hope Charles missed but convinced himself he totally didn't because of his narcissism.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Jack making Ramen would be a nightmare, especially if he insisted on doing the broth properly. Its something like twelve hours at a full boil with the pork bones, to get it right. I've had 2-3 hour broths and they're fucking garbage, not even worth bothering.

And this is why ramen masters spend their entire lives making that broth and getting it just right. It takes forever to learn how to do it properly. It's one thing I admire about the Japanese mindset. This idea of chasing perfection to one day make the perfect buckwheat noodle.

Firstly, it feels like the americans just mashed together tendon (which is tempura over rice) and ramen. They could've called it "tempura ramen" instead but it really feels like I'm being a linguistic sperg for nitpicking this. And secondly, just why? the soup will instantly de-crisp the tempura.

This is strip mall ramen from Tennessee where even the server thinks that katsuobushi is made from octopus. They could have called it anything they wanted and it's not like the majority of patrons would know the difference. Besides tempura in soup isn't anything new. Every New Years Eve there's a tradition that you eat Toshikoshi soba or "year crossing" soba. And one of the ingredients you see a lot of is tempura in it especially prawn. Yeah it gets the tempura soggy but what can you do?

In comments under this post Jack responded to someone mentioning that they got this from a local butcher. I am no hunter but that implies that Charles shot and wounded a deer but they were never able to track it down. Makes sense since Jagoff is the type of guy who would have insisted on taking a trophy-hunting pic with the corpse. Anyways, for the poor animal's sake I hope Charles missed but convinced himself he totally didn't because of his narcissism.

That's fucking horrible and irresponsible.

Sure it's only a deer and you're going to eat it but the animal deserves a quick and clean death. Just wounding it and not being able to track it is just evil. So here's hoping he missed and it was the sound of the rifle that spooked it.

 

[MS Paint Gigachad]

This idea of chasing perfection to one day make the perfect buckwheat noodle.

Well, ackchually,,, ramen isnt made from buckwheat, it's made from (regular) wheat. That be soba you're thinking about, but to be fair to you, the japs seem to use "soba" as a generic term for noodles. But yes! We can agree that we admire the borderline-autism in chasing perfection in one strangely-specific thing

While I'm at it:

This is strip mall ramen from Tennessee where even the server thinks that katsuobushi is made from octopus. They could have called it anything they wanted and it's not like the majority of patrons would know the difference.

That is largely why I called myself a "linguistic sperg", and the criticism I levelled "nitpicking" in my post earlier

Besides tempura in soup isn't anything new. Every New Years Eve there's a tradition that you eat Toshikoshi soba or "year crossing" soba. And one of the ingredients you see a lot of is tempura in it especially prawn. Yeah it gets the tempura soggy but what can you do?

I was not aware of this! Thanks for pointing it out.

 

[Polska krowa]

Well, ackchually,,, ramen isnt made from buckwheat, it's made from (regular) wheat. That be soba you're thinking about, but to be fair to you, the japs seem to use "soba" as a generic term for noodles. But yes! We can agree that we admire the borderline-autism in chasing perfection in one strangely-specific thing

While I'm at it:

That is largely why I called myself a "linguistic sperg", and the criticism I levelled "nitpicking" in my post earlier

I was not aware of this! Thanks for pointing it out.

If I remember correctly, it's because the use of buckwheat flour precedes the use of white flour. So soba was more of a generic term for noodles, resulting in the overlap in some noodle dishes (e.g., chuka soba, the traditional name for ramen or maze soba, a dry ramen dish).

Anywho, I love how the fake meat stuff has restarted now that he's spent some time with Chuck. The cut of meat in his pic looks like it'd be amazing to work with (before Jack had a go at cooking it, of course), it's a shame that it's wasted on Jack. There's nothing worse than being an anglofag and watching Jack with all these interesting cuts of meat and destroying them, it's hard enough to get most of the cuts Americans take for granted at a butchers, let alone a supermarket.

 

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

I wish fake meat was so cheap that they could substitute it for real meat and no one would know the difference. I'd buy that shit if that were the case.

 

[Helvítis Túristi]

The tonkatsu bun though, on the other hand... that's definitely a bigger divergence from the original

At first I thought you meant a katsu sandwich, but I rewatched the video and it's a steam bun. That's pretty weird.

> kimchi ramen

Not necessarily, I see plenty of Japanese chefs cooking Korean food or using Korean ingredients in their own dishes. Korea used to be a Japanese colony and there are Korean immigrants living in Japan, so I don't find it surprising for there to be a fusion between the two cuisines.

> wagyu ramen
someone said they don't trust it. Yeah, I agree.

In the way the restaurant is serving it, I would not trust it either. However, if it was served as shabu shabu with the noodles on the side. I'd probably eat that. The same with the lobster ramen. If the lobster ramen was served in a miso lobster broth, I'd probably eat that over the pork broth.

That said, I have, at times, felt like doing it with a leaner cut, lest (in the words of the illustrious @AnOminous ) I swell up like chairman Mao

You can definitely use a leaner cut of pork or you could make paitan ramen. Paitan ramen is similar, but it's made with chicken.