God that was the day I knew he wasn't a character. Like the piece de resistance was that fucking addendum. "Oh, they had the money, my parents were just stupid". Like you cannot make that up. Because my thoughts were well Phil, they probably couldn't swing it. I think literally every human listening to that thought that. Hell I have memories of being like 4 and asking my mom how she literally didn't have the money to buy a toy. And I am always impressed with her patience on not calling me a retard for that. And as I grew up, like everyone else, we all understand.
But something is just so fundamentally broken in his brain. That that isn't his parents money, that is his money. And even now he cannot grasp how they would not want to just splurge it on toys