Elliot Page / Ellen Page - Former actress, starred in Juno. Turned into a pooner and divorced her wife because being a lesbian was not boosting her career anymore. Receives a daily dose of asspatting from Hollywood. Likes to show off her "male" body using fake abdominals.

[scathefire]

Any comedian who leans on a gimmick is unfunny, but queer comedians are the worst, because they’re only relatable to other queers.

Also queers are forbidden from being genuinely edgy so all of the jokes just revolve around making the audience feel valid. Nothing legitimately observational or self-critical, because invalidating or criticizing them at any time for any reason by any person is bigotry.

 

[The Skeksis Emperor]

There is nothing cringier than perfume commercials but this one is particularly bad. Also obligatory that nigga is zesty as all hell.

 

[Procrastinhater]

There is nothing cringier than perfume commercials but this one is particularly bad. Also obligatory that nigga is zesty as all hell.

I don't even know what it's supposed to be?
Ellen is a cuck that hired a Big Black Bull to do the job Li'l Pooner can't for Wish.com Marilyn?

 

[The Skeksis Emperor]

I don't even know what it's supposed to be?

Some rapper who had kids with Rihanna but he's trying to be a fashion guy now.

also lol. oh Ellen.

 

[mrt6732]

Well Ellen, now you're just an even worse looking woman posing as a short dude.

 

[Positron]

3 women one big big black dick.

He looks terrible in the new Gucci campaign

Looks like a murder-suicide set up. I bet the Monroe pretender is the murderer and Ellen her first victim.

 

[Pig Cups]

Elliot's been promoting the TiF next to her. She's a comedian and is absolutely terrible.
Media input's not working so here's a link to youtube Link

God "queer" comedians are always so unfunny. The jokes are just "I chopped off my tits! I am a cuckold! I hate people who live a more common lifestyle than me! Non-heterosexuals all find me hilarious!"

Even worse, that god-awful routine was filmed with no audience. For Netflix. Seriously? Was there not even a handful of leftists/faggots/troons/pooners out there in CA that they could have brought together into a room to at least make it sound less dead? For the sake of the production, at least? Guess not.

Stand-up without the audience is very lacking, cold, and unsatisfactory. It's like watching The Three Stooges, with the slapstick sound effects edited out. Even if the comic doesn't use audience participation (where he or she converses with random members of the crowd to formulate jokes/roasts), the audience's reactions to certain material, as well as how the comic uses said reactions, can symbiotically add another layer of humor. Even a poetry slam without an audience would sound more lively than this drivel, as the frog voice and background silence make it sound like L'il Pooner is giving a eulogy.

Even worse than that? At first, I thought these comments were being ironic, and that they were slow-clapping over the lack of a live audience. Nope, they actually liked it and are being serious.

 

[Procrastinhater]

Some rapper who had kids with Rihanna but he's trying to be a fashion guy now.

also lol. oh Ellen.
View attachment 5563594

Christ she's still wearing the fucking clown shoes.
She must have no one in her life that cares about her enough to tell her those fucking lifted shoes look fucking ridiculous.
She literally looks like a Barnum and Bailey mascot.

 

[Tragi-Chan]

Fucking lol, tiny Li'l Pooner even has to have the legs of her jeans rolled up

How come none of these manly d00ds know how to alter clothes? Shortening pants is easy. Or just go to a tailor or dry cleaner that does alterations.

Even actual Dwarves like the Dinkledge guy from Game of Thrones look less feeble and tiny.

They were raised and socialised male. It doesn’t matter how big the pooner is if she acts like someone who blends into the background.

 

[Frogget-me-not]

Not interested in her book but I had a look at the reviews on Goodreads and the consensus seems to be it's confusing, unstructured, uncomfortably explicit and barely mentions poonerism or movie making but focusses on lesbianism and emotional distress. Sounds pretty bleak.

Was skimming through the book for choice quotes but ended up on pages upon pages of a history lesson that is completely unrelated to anything. It’s like she’s trying to pad the book for word count.

 

[Fornicario]

Was skimming through the book for choice quotes but ended up on pages upon pages of a history lesson that is completely unrelated to anything. It’s like she’s trying to pad the book for word count.

View attachment 5565683

Why did she write this? Did she want to be on the ship? I wish she was, then we'd have never heard of her.

 

[Frogget-me-not]

Why did she write this? Did she want to be on the ship? I wish she was, then we'd have never heard of her.

Context of the segment: she’s explaining the history of the place where she was called a faggot for the first time.



She closes the chapter musing how there must have been many sad homos killed in this horrific tragedy. think of all the lil pooners!

 

[pink cigarettes]

*explosion levels everything*
Ellen Page: "But what about the homos???"
*child goes missing*
Ellen Page: "It's extra sad if it turns out the kid is a fag."
*people dying of typhus in gulag*
Ellen Page: (pops out of a snow-bank) "anybody here like to take it in the butt? Just checking"

 

[PetiteFeet]

Context of the segment: she’s explaining the history of the place where she was called a faggot for the first time.

View attachment 5565717

She closes the chapter musing how there must have been many sad homos killed in this horrific tragedy. think of all the lil pooners!

View attachment 5565718

"we were two boys, and we looked like two boys"
So Ellen is now rewriting her own past? She was always a boy and never doubted her gender, passing as a lesbian woman because Hollywood is kinder to lesbian women????

 

[batteredpancakes]

Elliot seems to have a company called Pageboy Productions. Website here but there is no content yet.
Instagram
looks like she wants to go into producing films not acting. Her latest example is a short film called An Avocado Pit where she is the Executive Producer.

Description:

A trans woman and a cis man meet on the streets of Lisbon. They come from different realities but soon find common ground, challenging and laughing their way into each other’s arms.​

 

[Tragi-Chan]

Context of the segment: she’s explaining the history of the place where she was called a faggot for the first time.

View attachment 5565717

She closes the chapter musing how there must have been many sad homos killed in this horrific tragedy. think of all the lil pooners!

View attachment 5565718

On that day in 1917, as the burning SS Mont-Blanc drifted towards the shore, train dispatcher Vince Coleman returned to his post in order to stop incoming trains. No one told him to, he knew it was certain death, but in doing so, he saved hundreds of lives. His final telegraph read thus:

Hold up the train. Ammunition ship afire in harbour making for Pier 6 and will explode. Guess this will be my last message. Good-bye, boys.

He would have been killed instantly in the explosion. He left a wife and four children. It was an act of bravery and self-sacrifice to bring a tear to the eye.

Also Ellen Page got called a faggot there, so I guess that’s bad too.

 

[Procrastinhater]

They were raised and socialised male. It doesn’t matter how big the pooner is if she acts like someone who blends into the background.

That explains some of it but Pooners are such diminutive trembling little sacks of neurosis they don't even make good women, they're scared little girls, it makes Ellens attempt to LARP as the Sexual Tyrannosaurus guy from Predator even more comical.

 

[Behavioral Sink]

Vincent Coleman was a subject of one of the classic Canadian Heritage Minutes, short clips aired during commercial breaks on public TV (or in school on VHS tapes).

https://youtu.be/rw-FbwmzPKo

They named a city ferry after him in Halifax.



I do not believe that anyone called her a faggot in that park. That story is completely made up. Her persecution complex has invented homophobia beyond what actually existed in that exact time and place.

 

[Molly White's Breast Milk]

On that day in 1917, as the burning SS Mont-Blanc drifted towards the shore, train dispatcher Vince Coleman returned to his post in order to stop incoming trains. No one told him to, he knew it was certain death, but in doing so, he saved hundreds of lives. His final telegraph read thus:

He would have been killed instantly in the explosion. He left a wife and four children. It was an act of bravery and self-sacrifice to bring a tear to the eye.

Also Ellen Page got called a faggot there, so I guess that’s bad too.

How long until we have a Canadian Heritage Moment about Ellen "the Pooner" Page?

 

[OttoWest]

A trans woman and a cis man meet on the streets of Lisbon. They come from different realities but soon find common ground, challenging and laughing their way into each other’s arms.

Ah, yes I know this one: