Elliot Page / Ellen Page - Former actress, starred in Juno. Turned into a pooner and divorced her wife because being a lesbian was not boosting her career anymore. Receives a daily dose of asspatting from Hollywood. Likes to show off her "male" body using fake abdominals.

[Crex Crex]

She tries hard to style herself like a stereotypical 90s-2000s "bad boy", even though it's a look that gets relentlessly mocked. It's almost like she has no actual idea how to be a guy, and her perception of men is exclusively based on teen idols from the time she grew up in.

 

[LGHDR+]

It's almost like she has no actual idea how to be a guy, and her perception of men is exclusively based on teen idols from the time she grew up in.

This, this, a thousand times times this (except she missed the bullseye, dartboard, and even the floor somehow)!

 

[Fapcop]

Transitioning must have been the best career decision ever!

Image was never a triple A lister but dang, talk about a career harakiri.

Probably can’t even get audio work because of the frog voice.

 

[pink cigarettes]

She tries hard to style herself like a stereotypical 90s-2000s "bad boy", even though it's a look that gets relentlessly mocked. It's almost like she has no actual idea how to be a guy, and her perception of men is exclusively based on teen idols from the time she grew up in.

I really, really want her to get the stupid undercut with the perm on top thing that was happening with zoomers 5 minutes ago lol.

 

[WingsOfTarkov]

She would be much better off today if she actually let Michael Cera impregnate her back in the Juno days, married him, and lived out her life as a true and honest woman.

 

[LGHDR+]

She would be much better off today if she actually let Michael Cera impregnate her back in the Juno days, married him, and lived out her life as a true and honest woman.

Or Michael Cera would be dead, but blamed for abuse that never happened (well it happened, but some studio executive did it not him)

 

[HOMO FOR LIFE RETURNS]

You know what they say about your childhood crush.


......er....

Disappointment.

 

[Haftag]

She would be much better off today if she actually let Michael Cera impregnate her back in the Juno days, married him, and lived out her life as a true and honest woman.

How many western women, yet alone Canadians, yet alone celebrities do that these days?

 

[Haramburger]

Or Michael Cera would be dead, but blamed for abuse that never happened (well it happened, but some studio executive did it not him)

Good, then the Scott Pilgrim movie might've never happened, Brie Larson wouldn't have been the sexy ex-gf in that movie and not have taken a huge shit on the MCU with her playing Captain Marvel years later. I'd make that trade and be interested in how that timeline turns out.

 

[vanilla_pepsi_head]

Her fake abs always get me, they look like the Colchones bread that you can get for like 75¢ here at any grocery

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View attachment 5544915

Come on man, there's no way Ellen would be caught dead consuming that many carbs.

Troons really are fucking delusional about their self perception, I think we can all agree on that. You'd hope that a plastic surgeon might try to gently point out when someone demands something that will look asinine because they're delusional, or educate them on what constitutes a realistic expectation. But nah, seems like there's plenty who will eagerly try to graft your dick to your forehead if you want as long as the check clears. Apparently no one clued Ellen in (until after she did it) that a facsimile of John Cena's abs grafted onto a skinny, comically petite pooner won't make her look fit, tough, or cool, it just looks fucking ridiculous. And no, putting on really tall shoes isn't the last key piece to fooling anyone. Shit, she may as well go all the way and walk on fuckin stilts if she wants to. It's just like the trannies who get a set of gargantuan silicone "tits" and think they look fantastic and finally pass, apparently not noticing that his chest lumps, unlike an actual woman's actual tits, are pointing in opposite directions, placed all crooked, and spread super far apart to span his hulking man chest.

 

[Iron Jaguar]

I'm convinced the push to put kids on puberty blockers was originally concieved by pedophiles who are looking to make their vile perversion technically legal by having a pool of people who are past the age of consent but with pre pubescent bodies.

Law and Order: SVU had an episode with exactly that premise, early 2000's.
It's the same principle as pedogays going to Asian countries where they can have sex with teenage boys who are over the age of consent but look much, much younger.

 

[PetiteFeet]

Law and Order: SVU had an episode with exactly that premise, early 2000's.
It's the same principle as pedogays going to Asian countries where they can have sex with teenage boys who are over the age of consent but look much, much younger.

hate to break it to you, but the sex tourists fuck actual children and not just teenaged ones. Why do you think DD exists? It's an open secret that sex tourism and trafficking of children is a thing in SEA.

 

[Iron Jaguar]

hate to break it to you, but the sex tourists fuck actual children and not just teenaged ones.

This is not news, guy. But the ones who don't want to get arrested when they return to their own countries do it with teenagers. In fact, Asian twinks are popular in Western countries for the same reason.

 

[Nod Flenders]

She tries hard to style herself like a stereotypical 90s-2000s "bad boy", even though it's a look that gets relentlessly mocked. It's almost like she has no actual idea how to be a guy, and her perception of men is exclusively based on teen idols from the time she grew up in.

She looks more like a butch lesbian than she does a guy.

 

[Oilspill Battery]

hate to break it to you, but the sex tourists fuck actual children and not just teenaged ones. Why do you think DD exists? It's an open secret that sex tourism and trafficking of children is a thing in SEA.

What is DD?

 

[Procrastinhater]

This is honestly how I'd react:

What the fuck is this lol?

That guys voice.
It's really not fair on the interviewer that's a pretty normal reaction to someone so fucking absurd.
I love how the guy with the crazy deep voice starts talking and he loses what small part of his shit he still had together.

She would be much better off today if she actually let Michael Cera impregnate her back in the Juno days, married him, and lived out her life as a true and honest woman.

I'm pretty sure he's gay. He's a huge faggot at any rate.

 

[Sinner's Sandwich]

What the fuck is this lol?
View attachment 5551753
That guys voice.
It's really not fair on the interviewer that's a pretty normal reaction to someone so fucking absurd.
I love how the guy with the crazy deep voice starts talking and he loses what small part of his shit he still had together.

It's all just actors tho. It's not a real scene from a real show.

 

[PetiteFeet]

What is DD?

If you genuinely aren't aware, you don't want to know. Don't google it, don't even search for it here on the farms. It's the worst thing you can imagine happening to a child.

 

[SpumbleSplabloo]

If you genuinely aren't aware, you don't want to know. Don't google it, don't even search for it here on the farms. It's the worst thing you can imagine happening to a child.

Yeah, nothing's more horrible than making your kid the designated driver instead of letting them drink.

 

[LGHDR+]

Yeah, nothing's more horrible than making your kid the designated driver instead of letting them drink.

Ok, you get the last one for managing to squeeze a redirect AND a chuckle from that horror show:



Edit - My wife found another funny on Facebook: