Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta - Polysubstance enthusiast, "Lawtuber" turned Dabbleverse streamer, swinger, "whitebread ass nigga", snuffs animals for fun, visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold who lost his license to practice law. Wife's bod worth $50. The normies even know.

[alan thicke]

nick 's nose seems to be turning into a penis

 

[Prince_Stolas]

This will be Balldo in 2024

Nick would sell his own mother for that hairline, he was nowhere near that even in his prime. And look at those eyes - bright and full of hope, unreachable for Nick even on the most sober of days. Also, actually being outside touching grass and not in the hot tub? Highly unlikely. That image is what Nick wishes he could be.

A Rekieta law logo would look great on the urn.

It most certainly would.

 

[Chibitzen]

Nick mentioned having two knee surgeries

I'm more surprised he still has knees after all his visits to the gay bar.

and only ever taking one Percocet for post-op pain during his "I've never taken opiates

Wow, what a hero!!

Honestly, he sounds both mad and on the verge of tears. He physically places his head in his hand and covers his eyes as he says, "I'm NOT LUCKY!" (see below). Personally, I think that his immediate transition from talking about his marriage to prenups shows that either: (1) He desperately wants to divorce Our Wife, but can't due to the monetary support he'd get slapped with or (2) Our Wife is currently planning to divorce him, and he knows she's gonna take him to the cleaners.

Can confirm there's no ring. He shows both hands simultaneously in this rant.

Seems like the divorce arc will be coming soon.

Ees not true, Nool! I just wanted you to know...

In all honesty though, I hope that Nick stops his downward spiral and regains at least a little emotional control because he's starting to sound like a family annihilator. He seems to be really indifferent about his own death and the potential deaths of members in his immediate family in a way I can't help but be unnerved a bit.

Everyday is the worst day of his life as of late, but he doesn't "need" alcohol, a Percocet and questionably, his family. If we're really lucky, the bulk of it he will continue to take out on his masochistic viewership. After all, he's "working". Cgoody will just keep respawning, so no point in trying to get rid of him. His respawn point is reassigned to a hidden dimension once Nick quits Youtube though. Probably one of the shitty offshoot servers one of the unrequited hags made to cope and seethe. Love quest failed! Time to join another shitty Discord...

Banter aside, if he's going to be insufferable, hopefully finances or family reign him in enough to do it on his own rather than get the kids involved. Divorce is always a shame, but sometimes it's really for the best.

 

[Anticipointment]

About his rings missing, he did say he’s showered & forgot to put them back on.

Also told some convoluted thing about Kayla was wearing the blue silicone one on her thumb because when he got out of bed one day she was sad and wanted something to remember him by. So she took the blue ring to have on her thumb.
But, they are married. And he wasn’t leaving the house. Ok if it was a newish relationship and guy was traveling across the world but given the circumstances, seems oddly clingy.

Anyway after she took the blue ring he started wearing the two metal ones but then forgot after the shower. However that doesn’t explain the several times previously this month that he’s had one or both rings missing. He said that’s what happened but then invited the Internet to make their own story about the rings since he knows they will regardless.

ETA he talked about dresses way too much, several times. He sounds legit jealous, like he wants those dresses for himself. Maybe that’s what he’s been starving himself for

 

[Not Who You Think]

It was fun at first. Now it isn't funny anymore. Nobody likes to see a man destroy himself in this way for no good reason.

Nick could have handled his decline in a number of ways. A lot of his decisions have been hilariously bad (and legitimately concerning for some). With every mistake Nick's options have narrowed. This has funneled him toward a stereotypical/predictable kind of personal ruin.

The past 14 months or so have been interesting because Nick had somewhere to go, even if it was down. Nick doesn't really have that anymore. The only surprising thing Nick can do at this point is start making consistently good decisions. Unfortunately for Nick, he seems to be all out of surprises.

This coming year will be depressing for Nick. It seems that people are having a hard time even watching clips of him. While it can be hard to look away from a trainwreck in motion, burning rubble can be somewhat less compelling.

 

[DaleMcGuy]

Would you say Ethan Ralph's down spiral was worse than Rekieta's so far? Because Rekieta feels way worse, like he drove off a cliff at max speed, or maybe Rekieta had a bigger cliff to fall from compared to Ethan who was already fucking up a lot.

I feel like the Portugal beatdowns, while funny, didn't play much into Ethan's life. It seems like he got more fucked up after Metokur mocked him for it rather than after the beatdown itself.

Rackets seems like he got lobotomized one night when I wasn't looking and turned into the Balldo.

I would argue Ralph is worse. Constantly blackout drunk, xaniberries, both physical and sexual assault on women, dox his fans from their payment info, flagging content creators he didn't like after Mundane Matt fiasco. Ralph has descended so far he has destroyed any potential at life.

People forget Ralph was well liked too before his current state.

Rekieta as far as we know hasn't done any of that except use drink as an excuse to say the things he does. It feels like he fell further as people most likely were Nick fans and heard about Ralph after his own descent. Also, consider that Nick seemed to have his life together in a much better state than Ralph ever did.

Most people are still in the shock phase of Rekieta's descent into a cow. Considering his constant seething at Josh, freak out on Sean, insulting his wife live to the world, cOOming for a catfish, the Pippa thing, being dismissive of anyone who shows concern, constant lies by omission, and him still going off on Eric July after settling his case...We are beyond sympathy now. He is a pathetic thin skinned wino who lashes out at everyone and has a good cry when people slap back.

Never ignore when people are showing you who they are. Use them as an example of how to never behave and better yourself.

 

[kurosawa]

The end of that stream when coomalot showed up was a very awkward watch. Sex and relationship convo of course, there were "taint paintings" for sale at the Nashville strip club, obsessing over Chrissie Mayr's content house, etc.

Party foul. Honestly thought he was going to spill out of his chair.

I don't know why my mind went here but I think South Park will have to update James Cameron attempting to raise the bar to a 2023 version.

 

[Mister Dongs]

Rekieta isn't at the point of drinking brown tapwater like Ralph, true, but he fell off from such a greater height that it's hard to say which is worse. Ralph at his peak was a guy living in some shitbox in the middle of Alabama with his mom who was somewhat popular on the internet. Nick had an actual life.

 

[WelperHelper99]

Rekieta isn't at the point of drinking brown tapwater like Ralph, true, but he fell off from such a greater height that it's hard to say which is worse. Ralph at his peak was a guy living in some shitbox in the middle of Alabama with his mom who was somewhat popular on the internet. Nick had an actual life.

Even sadder is that Ralph is actually doing better for himself now. He's lost the gunt. Sure he's not going to hit where Rackets peak was, but comparing the two as they are, Ralph somehow has his shit better together living in a Mexican dung hut than a man with a mansion

 

[Harm]

Party foul. Honestly thought he was going to spill out of his chair.

I love it when he switches the whiskey glass between hands out of frame like that. It makes him look like he's dual wielding alcoholic beverages like it's Dark Souls.

 

[Blasterisk]

I love it when he switches the whiskey glass between hands out of frame like that. It makes him look like he's dual wielding alcoholic beverages like it's Dark Souls.

Being Nick Rekieta's liver is like the Dark Souls of internal organs.

 

[Pomniman]

I love it when he switches the whiskey glass between hands out of frame like that. It makes him look like he's dual wielding alcoholic beverages like it's Dark Souls.

The Non-Practicing Lawyer class comes with the ability to powerstance two balldoes which gives +15 points to your homosexuality stat.

 

[Chibitzen]

Here's the thing, I'm a fedora-tipping atheist that wasn't looking for a Catholic e-daddy and was never much of a Rekieta fan or follower, I was drawn to the thread because of how much this guy is imploding and falling apart. How would Rackets explain that away?

Remember when he told us all "just have fun!"? "It's just a joke". We take things too seriously, etc. Well, here we are having a good time laughing at the state of it and he still complains!

 

[PhoBingas]

Insane decline. Completely and utterly spiraling out of control.

Shit eh? Seeing them side by side like that, no wonder people have been calling him AIDs Rackets... Well, maybe only I'm calling him AIDs Rackets, but that's fuckin' rough. If someone in my life that I cared about took that drastic of a turn in just a couple years, I'd be trying to get them into rehab if I gave a shit about them. Nick literally looks like a fent zombie.

Literal wetbrain schizobabble. What is this garbled nonsense from a damaged brain even supposed to mean?

I THINK Nick's trying to say he rents out Lady Rackets on a boat, but your guess is as good as mine.

I would argue Ralph is worse. Constantly blackout drunk, xaniberries, both physical and sexual assault on women, dox his fans from their payment info, flagging content creators he didn't like after Mundane Matt fiasco. Ralph has descended so far he has destroyed any potential at life.

Ralph only looks worse because he started from like rock bottom trailer trash and acted like it, doing trailer trash shit like knocking up teens, smoking meth and leaving bastard kids everywhere. Nick was supposed to be a lawyer. Last I checked, lawyer is a pretty respectable job. Nick chose to bring himself down to the level of cop-punching, meth-smoking, demon baby spawning z-celebs instead of pursuing a "respectable" career as a lawyer.

 

[TheSoutherStar]

>laugh at kiwifarm getting blackholed
>greer's lawyers leaves

>mockingly toasts josh's demise
>court order for josh to pay turns out forged

I think God might be subbed to elissa clips

 

[prolapsed_cranium]

Rekieta didn't say that, I just saw this amazing contrast between the expression on his face and the expression on Camelot's face in their stream and thought it looked like Rekieta was spewing schizobabble at Camelot as Camelot barely tolerates it while feeling nothing but contempt for Rekieta. The fact that you think it's instantly believable that he'd be so incoherent says a lot about where he's at, though.

You're asking for a lot of introspection and self-realization from Coomalot.

 

[Doctor John B. Zyklon]

Oh God no.

 

[stupid frog]

"Time to stop" levels are off the charts.

View attachment 5594918

What's his mom's account here

 

[Some Badger]

View attachment 5595149

Oh God no.

>Family and Faith

Oh God I'm so ready for this trainwreck.

 

[Chibitzen]

Fun fact: I know someone on the beat tonight who is about to begin a DWI/DUI initiative in their area, so I sent the Rekieta Drunksplaining video to them to help them kick it off.

Too bad they can't play things like this for the people in the back... "Wtf, officer!! That dude's drunker than me!"...