Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta - Polysubstance enthusiast, "Lawtuber" turned Dabbleverse streamer, swinger, "whitebread ass nigga", snuffs animals for fun, visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold who lost his license to practice law. Wife's bod worth $50. The normies even know.

[AltisticRight]

Though speaking of the topic, Balldo's whole attempt to try to get Pippa to leave Phase was also obnoxiously retarded as he tried to claim she'd make way more collecting her full super chat pay, but he completely forgets when Phase does merch runs, which they do constantly and more than just shitty shirts, she gets a cut, and they also pay for her equipment, her models and additional designs, and from what I've heard they even paid a salary when the first generation was starting out to get things rolling as a new company.

I'm pretty sure they own the entire persona.
That's like telling these whatever Kpop stars to leave their producers, did that ever work out for anyone? None that I know of, which explains it?

Balldo pulls this kind of stunts all the time. He'll pretend to have a person's best interests just to gaslight them into making horrible decisions. It's like your average private company petty office politics but on a far worse, mean girls kind of scale. There's no way he thought that was a good idea.

The only reason to not vote for Rekieta is that you don't follow his thread. And I can't blame anyone for not doing so. It's very dense with information, and it moves relatively fast. Bossman Jack's thread is a lot easier to digest. Man child yells at computer monitor, loses money on gambling site, and ragequits. Rinse and repeat.
I check in on Austin every couple of weeks and I never really miss anything. Same shit, different day.

It's sad, though. I really want Nick to win. The coping and seething would be hilarious.

Fatrick is another lolcow I don't really care to follow because a lot of it honestly seems forced. Fatrick trolls do nasty stunts like abusing DMCAs and copyright which is gay to full blown swattings which they should just kill themselves for doing, Fatrick reacts negatively. Like okay, both of you just get a life already. Swatters should get a rope.

Bossman was only hilarious for maybe a couple times, those gifs were great though.

Just my opinion.

 

[AnOminous]

Booze hounds will often agree to this to get family and friends off their back. When they fail (as they invariably do) it's just one more argument in favour of rehab.

Doesn't always work too well.

the difference is Ralph was already a thin skinned doxer who went to jail for beating up a cop while drunk.

He did not beat up the female cop he tried to batter. He missed. That's probably why he didn't spend longer in jail. He FAILED to beat up a female cop.

 

[MunsterCheeseJr]

Whenever I see Nick drinking heavy and making a fool of himself, I can't help but think of the song Mr. Bojangles.

We might as well start calling him Mr. Bojangles when he makes a drunk clown out of himself. It is the same level of entertainment.

 

[Mordecai "3 Finger" Brown]

Fuck, Nick has a point. He did help a lot of lawtubers launch their careers and channels, and I guess this is what he’s bitching about.

But fuck, if you never do trial streams anymore, is it really weird that other lawyers aren’t knocking at your door to be let in?

I agree that there's a kernel of truth here.

But this is really nothing new. The rowdy, big, new-faces-paid-in-exposure panels were gone by the start of Depp.

How much of it was LegalBytes snaking his guests behind the scenes months before it all came public isn't known.

But at the start of Depp, Nick was already in third place behind Emily and Alyte, claiming he no longer cared for the hard-to-manage, everyone's one invited Lawtube panels. Nick openly stated frequently that he preferred a very short curated list of invites consisting of Branca, Legal Vices (a literal nobody that Nick did genuinely create), Legal Mindset, Andrea Burkhart and occasionally DUI Guy.

So, save for Legal Vices, Nick can't really take credit for boosting anyone since Rittenhouse. And even then, he profited handsomely at the time from superchats while everyone else got paid for weeks of screentime in "exposure".

Bossman Jack's thread is a lot easier to digest. Man child yells at computer monitor, loses money on gambling site, and ragequits. Rinse and repeat.

Null was interviewed by sympathetic-but-mostly-clueless-normie YTuber Benjamin Boyce last week.

When asked by Ben what Lolcow thread Null would recommend to curious newfags, he chose BJ.

 

[AnOminous]

Fuck, Nick has a point. He did help a lot of lawtubers launch their careers and channels, and I guess this is what he’s bitching about.

He's still an ungrateful faggot who acts like he didn't benefit from having more than one viewpoint on his show, which was part of why it was worth watching. Look at him now. His show is just him drinking alone, ranting and raving about the Farms, or yelling at the few guests who do show up like Sean, almost like he's so wetbrained he can't distinguish between Kiwi Farms and whoever is in front of him.

 

[Maraschino]

Though speaking of the topic, Balldo's whole attempt to try to get Pippa to leave Phase was also obnoxiously retarded as he tried to claim she'd make way more collecting her full super chat pay, but he completely forgets when Phase does merch runs, which they do constantly and more than just shitty shirts, she gets a cut, and they also pay for her equipment, her models and additional designs, and from what I've heard they even paid a salary when the first generation was starting out to get things rolling as a new company.

Nick had the audacity to claim that he could manage her better than Phase Connect ever could. But can he?

Things Nick can't manage, according to Nick:
-making inappropriate jokes about shit that also aren't fucking funny to anyone but himself
-the schedules of his children
-people telling him what to do (because how dare you)
-people telling him what not to do (because how dare you)
-scheduling a Youtuber panel for Matsuri
-starting fights with other people (look at a previous stream with Kurt, where he admits that he "hates" that he's the one who constantly starts bullshit)
-replying to texts in a timely manner
-his Youtube editor
-employees in general (because why don't they read his mind)

Things Nick can manage, according to Nick:
-an anime rabbit

Lol. Lmao, even. Go fuck yourself, you just want to drag other people down to control them.

 

[Musashi's Son]

When your wife has left you and you only have a bottle of alcohol home.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

Fuck, Nick has a point. He did help a lot of lawtubers launch their careers and channels

And he clearly did it with an expectation of getting something in return. Which means he didn’t help anyone with a freely given gift but an all strings attached future gripe.

A favor done with expectations is just a resentment waiting to happen. Nick likes resentments because they give him a reason to drink. So he keeps manufacturing them, probably not even consciously aware of his sick patterns. Many such cases!

 

[Mordecai "3 Finger" Brown]

And realistically, who could Nick hold up as a shining example of a Lawtuber that he launched to new heights?

- Emily Baker did her own thing and hasn't been associated since Rittenhouse
- Viva Frei similarly established his own niche and similarly hasn't been seen since Kyle. It's arguable that Viva made Nick with his Rittenhouse tweet later boosted by Jack Posobiec that made Nick's trialstreaming explode
- Uncivil Law is reapplying for lawyer jobs
- Good Lawgic hustles every night but isn't particularly relevant or growing
- Runkle of the Bailey has carved out his small livestreaming niche of an interesting blend of Canadian gun nuts and foreigners liking wholesome content
- LegalBytes apparently still does okay but no one gives a shit
- Law&Lumber did okay on the Maya coverage, but is more of an Alyte creation
- have no idea what Nate the Lawyer is up to.
- Legal Vices grew a moderately successful channel from nothing. But still works a day job. And put in a lot of work on his own, curating his own audience with unique content like reviewing maritime disasters, watching the old OJ trial, doing Friday drinking streams after Nick rebranded, etc.

In some respects, other than Legal Vices, Potentially Criminal is probably the best example of Nick's halo effect 2.0 after Rittenhouse.

Sean has acted as a refugee camp for disaffected Nick fans. But even then, his channel only has 17-18k subs, even with Nick's "boost". And Sean hustles himself, streaming trials, consistent Thursday night shows covering actual legal stuff, twice weekly exclusive Locals content.

And even with Sean, he still came back on stream as an Internet friend when Nick was at his worst and was burning all the bridges.

 

[Señora Airi]

I’ve heard they basically said maybe in a way that’s effectively, if it’s a success whatever and if it fails this is proof of us being right in scheduling your play dates.

She did counter Rekieta and Coomelot’s narrative about hating the company as it was spewed. The entire thing with Rekieta was psychotic. Trying to ruin some trailer trash vtuber because your friend effectively pissed off vtuber fans with a bad joke and kept doubling down.

What's also hilarious to look at, is how healthier Pippa has been (being the face of one of the most well known EN vtuber companies, happier, getting to meet one of her inspirations on a collab).

Compare that with where Rackets and Coomer are at.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

Nick: “If I’m too controversial or edgy for you, fuck off and die!”
¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Also Nick: “Why doesn’t anyone want to associate with me since I went from law streamer to degeneracy diarist?”

 

[Goofy Logic]

Fuck, Nick has a point. He did help a lot of lawtubers launch their careers and channels, and I guess this is what he’s bitching about.

Having an "I made you" attitude is really counterproductive to any personal relationship you want to buid and corrosive to your self-esteem. Lowtax had that attitude about any kind of success based on his forum too, and he suck-started a pistol

 

[Dixieland Buckaroo]

almost like he's so wetbrained he can't distinguish between Kiwi Farms and whoever is in front of him.

Balldoman has done the "talking to force ghosts" conversation/ interview thing Ralph did with "Andrew Tate", notably in the initial Eric July rant. He started it off as a monologue but it quickly morphed into a "conversation" with no one, but in Balldoland, he was totally helping out his good PARDNA Eric July.

I am not shocked his spirited brain is still pretending he's still big time, or that he's totally owning his enemies. Shit he has not the balls to do in real life.

Spoiler: You know why

Because his balls fell off from balldo use.

 

[Artificial Stupidity]

Dearest Balldoman fans and haters

The 2023 Julays have opened for voting. Our dear alcoholic is in a distant third for lolcow of 2023!

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/the-julays-ninth-annual-lolcow-awards-2023.179333/

View attachment 5598078
Let's get those numbers up, just like Balldoman's BAC!

Edit to add: make sure to follow the rules- vote for Rackets in the poll only. Vote for up to 3 of the other categories only in a post, as well as both blue categories. Don't be like the Fatrick voters! They are as dumb as their cow, stalker children.

Reposting the kiwibond for balldo & him winning the julays

 

[Paul Revere Pantry Raider]

We might as well start calling him Mr. Bojangles when he makes a drunk clown out of himself. It is the same level of entertainment.

Mr. Balldojangles.

 

[Harm]

Dear Nicholas Rekieta,

Please reconsider espousing the symptoms of alcoholic brain damage with unbridled envy. These "hallucinations" you've described are not the flavors of hallucination you'd enjoy from recreational drug use. What you are inviting won't be temporary fantastical sensations. You will be living through Disco Elysium forever. Your beautiful wife will look at you one morning, and you will see an absolute stranger. Those children in your house will not be your offspring, but inhabitants of a foreign home you will never recognize again. Those patches of grey matter encompassing all the memories of that loving family will be worthless mush inside your shit skull. You will be permanently losing the ability to properly discern yourself and your surroundings. They'll hospitalize you for your safety. The few memories that remain will be woefully outdated and incomplete. You won't even be able to recall your Lawtube glory years. Every remaining day you will feel so alone as your faulty understanding of reality leaves you sitting there with nagging questions, like: "Why is that nurse bringing my provigil for me in a wax paper cup? Why won't they let me drink more whiskey in my new dormitory? Will my buddy Drexel ever come to visit me again?" And he won't. None of them will bear it. Those friends you burned by putting them through the loss of someone they cared about, all because you chose booze over them, will make the trip to visit you unbearable. If they did come to visit, you'd never recognize them anyways. The pain from seeing you in that state will be too much to bear and they will simply disappear forever, justifying it by telling themselves you won't really notice. Because you won't.

Whatever happens next: You do it to yourself.

 

[Obsul]

He had a fucking school shooting list as a child.

Who, Rekieta? July? This is something I missed, I don't follow cows consistently, I drift in and out of paying attention to them.

 

[WEEKEND]

bragging about being a functioning drunk

Everyone is a functioning drunk until they stop being functional. Does Nick think that all those homeless drunks/drug addicts out there hit rock bottom after one drop? How fucking stupid is he?

 

[I (Don't) Have A Gun]

Dear Nicholas Rekieta,

Please reconsider espousing the symptoms of alcoholic brain damage with unbridled envy. These "hallucinations" you've described are not the flavors of hallucination you'd enjoy from recreational drug use. What you are inviting won't be temporary fantastical sensations. You will be living through Disco Elysium forever. Your beautiful wife will look at you one morning, and you will see an absolute stranger. Those children in your house will not be your offspring, but inhabitants of a foreign home you will never recognize again. Those patches of grey matter encompassing all the memories of that loving family will be worthless mush inside your shit skull. You will be permanently losing the ability to properly discern yourself and your surroundings. They'll hospitalize you for your safety. The few memories that remain will be woefully outdated and incomplete. You won't even be able to recall your Lawtube glory years. Every remaining day you will feel so alone as your faulty understanding of reality leaves you sitting there with nagging questions, like: "Why is that nurse bringing my provigil for me in a wax paper cup? Why won't they let me drink more whiskey in my new dormitory? Will my buddy Drexel ever come to visit me again?" And he won't. None of them will bear it. Those friends you burned by putting them through the loss of someone they cared about, all because you chose booze over them, will make the trip to visit you unbearable. If they did come to visit, you'd never recognize them anyways. The pain from seeing you in that state will be too much to bear and they will simply disappear forever, justifying it by telling themselves you won't really notice. Because you won't.

Whatever happens next: You do it to yourself.

"It sounds fun though"
I think those words have gotten him to where he is now, for better or worse.

 

[Fake Steve Franssen]

There was a video he put out about how there's no way to fight accusations he's an addict, then goes off on a huge list of reasons why.

It was conspicuous to me that he did not mention going sober for a while to prove he could. In private, I speculated it was him being afraid mentioning it would get people on board with the idea, and get simply didn't want to invite the problem.

I think that this rant raised the same thoughts in his audience, and they challenged him in to do it in discord or something.

I think it's this clip: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2F2K3wFqsaM