🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

[God's strongest milkman]

He literally does this already lol
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" You think you're half as good as the ralpha male?!?! I took a 14 inch shit this morn, damn near overflowed the toilet! Your piddly rabbit shits couldn't doooo thaaaatttt! HARRY MORRIIIIIISSSSSS!!! I SHIT LIKE A KING!"

If old school Xbox live was a thing Ralph could legitimately revitalize his brand by just playing call of duty and arguing with every kid he finds about how "no actually you're the loser!" It's great fun how he tries to use literally any stupid thing to stroke his own ego, the fact he actually has nothing to be proud of means he has to use more and more desperate measures.

 

[Franz Joseph]

The man is tempting fate. During the previous Super Bowl he lost his twitter and nearly necked…

What nuclear L is he summoning now?
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Lol posting Taylor Swift photos, dude really is a bitch.

 

[Magnificent Penis]

People get pretty autistic over their football teams, probably the most autistic second only to politics. It makes no sense to me either. It's not like Ethan is getting a trophy, money, prestige or anything tangible from the Chiefs winning. He's just another fat American living vicariously through athletic men cause he doesn't have the will or fortitude to train himself.

But just to give you an idea of how retarded sportsball makes people, here's an article from 2017 where a guy stabbed his own brother to death after arguing over a fuckin football game.

https://www.nydailynews.com/2017/01/19/man-stabs-brother-to-death-following-argument-over-cowboys-packers-game/

I know this is a newfag account and all but can I bitch about links that go "disable incognito mode and let us litter your browser with tracking cookies otherwise we dont want you here"?

 

[Look--an Alien!]

The man is tempting fate. During the previous Super Bowl he lost his twitter and nearly necked…

What nuclear L is he summoning now?
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Well, Ralph is an admitted retard now, so he is definitely in the group most affected by obvious psy ops like this.

 

[porkWellington]

The man is tempting fate. During the previous Super Bowl he lost his twitter and nearly necked…

What nuclear L is he summoning now?
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Tweet | Archive

Taylor Swift is Ralph's newest headmate.

 

[Mr. Manchester]

The man is tempting fate. During the previous Super Bowl he lost his twitter and nearly necked…

What nuclear L is he summoning now?
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That's part of the fun, it's always a weird surprise. Sky's the limit as far as I'm concerned.

 

[Um...]

Lol posting Taylor Swift photos, dude really is a bitch.

He couldn’t be more of a teenage girl if he tried, between the Taylor Swift fangirling, filtered and photoshopped selfies, posting pics of his food (look how yummy!) his journaling and ‘poetry’ writing, self-diagnosing (“a-ah think ah may have BPD, Harreh”) and moody weepy episodes. He even types like a teenage girl with ‘lol’ after every sentence, haha btw tbh too.

His estrogen levels must be off the charts (all that fat oozes estrogen.)

 

[Scout Trooper]

Taylor Swift is Ralph's newest headmate.

Does this mean we're going to get Andrew Tate AND Taylor Swift on the next Xanax ghost panel??!

 

[Lomax]

The man is tempting fate. During the previous Super Bowl he lost his twitter and nearly necked…

What nuclear L is he summoning now?
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Tweet | Archive

The real cruel summer is coming....

 

[Pale Empress]

He couldn’t be more of a teenage girl if he tried, between the Taylor Swift fangirling, filtered and photoshopped selfies, posting pics of his food (look how yummy!) his journaling and ‘poetry’ writing, self-diagnosing (“a-ah think ah may have BPD, Harreh”) and moody weepy episodes. He even types like a teenage girl with ‘lol’ after every sentence, haha btw tbh too.

His estrogen levels must be off the charts (all that fat oozes estrogen.)

This could all be easily solved by simply buying a motorcycle, but instead he's content to continue wallowing in his femininity.

 

[Rubber Plant]

He couldn’t be more of a teenage girl if he tried, between the Taylor Swift fangirling, filtered and photoshopped selfies, posting pics of his food (look how yummy!) his journaling and ‘poetry’ writing, self-diagnosing (“a-ah think ah may have BPD, Harreh”) and moody weepy episodes. He even types like a teenage girl with ‘lol’ after every sentence, haha btw tbh too.

His estrogen levels must be off the charts (all that fat oozes estrogen.)

Don't forget about his obsession with purses and sunglasses!

 

[AncientPhosphur]

If old school Xbox live was a thing Ralph could legitimately revitalize his brand by just playing call of duty and arguing with every kid he finds about how "no actually you're the loser!" It's great fun how he tries to use literally any stupid thing to stroke his own ego, the fact he actually has nothing to be proud of means he has to use more and more desperate measures.

Doubt. Ralph is a coward at heart. He can’t handle pushback let alone other people watching him play video games (and sucking)

 

[KneeLengthCock]

This could all be easily solved by simply buying a motorcycle, but instead he's content to continue wallowing in his femininity.

We would never be that lucky.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

I don’t think Ralph even knows how to ride a bicycle. Ronnie abandoned him and it’s not like Sandra was giving bike riding lessons between rapes.

 

[Capt. Jean Luc Ritard]

The man is tempting fate. During the previous Super Bowl he lost his twitter and nearly necked…

What nuclear L is he summoning now?
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Tweet | Archive

finally admitting he behaves like a scorned woman. He's really coming along.

 

[Raven-621]

The man is tempting fate. During the previous Super Bowl he lost his twitter and nearly necked…

What nuclear L is he summoning now?
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Tweet | Archive

RalFemale arc coming along nicely. When this sentient wad of lard’s egg cracks, we already know what woman he’s going to be skinwalking.

 

[Rage Pig]

Lawyer fixed Gunts water, toilet stuffed with torta poo.

 

[Braphamut]

Lawyer fixed Gunts water, toilet stuffed with torta poo.

Baby Boy has zero life skills. I've generally assumed if he's been at a place for over four of five months broke shit just goes ignored until he's evicted.

Piss in the bottles and poop in the torta boxes until the neighbors complained.

 

[Lomax]

Lawyer fixed Gunts water, toilet stuffed with torta poo.View attachment 5715835

I want to know the sequence of events that led up to this. Did he call up his lawyer asking for help with his plumbing? The alternative is his lawyer is visiting so often that he offered to do plumbing for torta money... i feel there is a bigger story

 

[Lidl Drip]

I want to know the sequence of events that led up to this. Did he call up his lawyer asking for help with his plumbing? The alternative is his lawyer is visiting so often that he offered to do plumbing for torta money... i feel there is a bigger story

The lawyer is probably his only local contact to ask for help when he has an issue, he's lucky he even has someone like that willing to help him with stuff since he's such a useless manbaby living alone for the first time and Ronnie taught him zero useful adult skills.