Are you lost needing femoid advice post here - For the poor bastard's who dare or are just curious

[TapewormSalesman]

This is something I'll never understand why other dudes don't get this. I'm an autistic sped idiot, yet it's common sense to know if you are interested in someone beyond lizard brain "she has big booba, me want to stick pp in her hooha" then you have to genuinely be interested. Asking questions isn't hard, it's how you learn and gauge compatibility with people. I'm in my 30s, so maybe this is a generational thing and guys younger than me are just retarded, I could also believe that because this seems like really basic shit to me.

There's this whole idea that "texts are only for setting up dates", and it shows up in places where men give each other advice a lot, which I never understood. Now I never did any of the proper dating thing (I met my husband on 4chan, I've no firsthand "dating" experience lmao) but holy crap my paranoid ass would not have gone anywhere with a random dude that just says when and where to meet. You'd think that you would get to know a bit more than bare minimum before you enter any kind of commitment and I'd put spending time, money and fuel for meeting up in person as a form of commitment already, but I guess normies don't really see it that way.

 

[Kill Your Idols]

Finally went ahead a little while back and made a profile for dating, myself (partly after having read a few pages here). I'm definitely that guy who doesn't like making a move, but hadn't really considered women dealt with the same thing at all in the slightest. To be honest I've just been passing on every person the app throws my way thinking 'man this woman is both super attractive and is doing some incredible stuff right now while I'm just a basic 9-5 guy'. Maybe the 'I'm probably not worth this person's time' mentality is some bullshit incel thinking that I picked up, but it's interesting to hear that women also deal with struggling to send the first message.

The thing to keep in mind is that profiles are advertisements and just like advertisements, you're never getting the full picture. Both sexes do this. People want to show others the highlights of their life because those are the most immediately attractive and eye-catching, so you're not seeing the (likely) mundane and lame day-to-day things going on in these girls' lives behind the scenes. You should at least try to be a little exciting on your profile, but keep it natural and remember that you're trying to sell, "this could be us" and not, "this is my everyday".

I mostly disdain using apps now because the process gets beyond tedious after awhile, but I do think they're good stepping stones if you're not meeting women regularly. Unless you're on an app where the like economy is heavily restricted, it doesn't hurt to liberally swipe right. Keep swiping on girls you like, learn how to introduce yourself, try to keep the conversations engaging and fun (for you and her), get ghosted, get rejected, finally land a few dates, but once you get the hang of it, I would think of an exit strategy away from apps. Hopefully you'll figure out what kind of guy you want to be and who you want to be with so you can find better avenues for dating.

Or maybe you're a secret Adonis who'll get laid constantly via app hook-ups. You never know.

 

[DickMain]

Or maybe you're a secret Adonis get laid constantly via app hook-ups. You never know.

Definitely not, but thanks very much. It's been a long time since I've bothered with the dating pool, since I kind of wanted to get my own shit straightened out and needed to grow up a little, which took about a decade.

 

[Dyn]

There's this whole idea that "texts are only for setting up dates", and it shows up in places where men give each other advice a lot, which I never understood. Now I never did any of the proper dating thing (I met my husband on 4chan, I've no firsthand "dating" experience lmao) but holy crap my paranoid ass would not have gone anywhere with a random dude that just says when and where to meet. You'd think that you would get to know a bit more than bare minimum before you enter any kind of commitment and I'd put spending time, money and fuel for meeting up in person as a form of commitment already, but I guess normies don't really see it that way.

Meeting each other on the internet by happenstance and hitting it off and slowly building trust is a totally different thing to using dating apps. On dating apps, like Drip said, women are flooded with a bunch of other men trying to impress them, and it's very difficult to do anything on that medium to make yourself stand out. Your best shot, as a man, is to offer concrete plans for a meetup, right out the gate, because sooner or later you'll catch somebody browsing matches while lonely, or horny, or bored, and she'll choose the guy offering an actual date over the ten identical guys wasting her time texting "wassup? wat u into?".

When you meet in person, then you can see how well you get along.

 

[Mayor Cody Travers]

Definitely not, but thanks very much. It's been a long time since I've bothered with the dating pool, since I kind of wanted to get my own shit straightened out and needed to grow up a little, which took about a decade.

This is what I need to do as well, though I cop I fear it'll take as long or longer.

 

[Mayor Cody Travers]

I need to ask what are some basic hobbies and places to go to that not only force me out in real life, but will have enough people around it's impossible to not socialize.

I need to learn to keep myself busy but also learn to interact with people after becoming too doomer and terminally online. I finally have to learn or else it'll never get better for me.

 

[Yeeted Teet]

I need to ask what are some basic hobbies and places to go to that not only force me out in real life, but will have enough people around it's impossible to not socialize.

Sports, martial arts, or dancing are all group activities that will pretty much force you to talk to people. Learning a language and joining a group to practice it could be a good choice if you're not into physical activity.

The best choice would be something you're already interested in so you're likely to stick with it, you don't want this to become a chore. If you really don't know where to start because you have no interests outside of lolcows and doomscrolling, check out night courses in your area and see if anything catches your eye. Most reasonably sized towns will have pottery or cooking or archery classes, find something you like the sound of and use it as a jumping off point.

 

[Otterly]

I need to ask what are some basic hobbies and places to go to that not only force me out in real life, but will have enough people around it's impossible to not socialize.

I need to learn to keep myself busy but also learn to interact with people after becoming too doomer and terminally online. I finally have to learn or else it'll never get better for me.

Hiking, sports, and if you’re not that sporty a sort-of-sport like shooting or fencing?
Personally I’d think of hobbies as two types; the type you can do alone at home to really just make your brain focus on something and use your hands, and the type you have to go out to do. The former would be something like drawing or woodcut prints and the latter something like hiking or a tennis club.

I struggle with ‘going out and doing stuff’ as well so it’s good to have a home hobby to fall back on. What are you into? What’s around you? Warm or cold climate? Mountains? Water? Wild swimming is good. Think about what kind of people different pastimes attract as well . If a sport needs and expensive club you’re going to meet different people to if it involves getting filthy and meeting up to get changes in car parks (just read that back and it sounds dodgy, I’m thinking more of caving than dogging….)
Canoeing? Swimming in lakes? Hiking? Rock climbing? Metalwork? Anything you’ve seen and thought ‘that looks really fun.

 

[bile demon]

You are just a faggot.

I'll take being a faggot over being a suicidal autistic nigger seething about getting buckbroken by women over and over again to an audience of female Nulls and bored housewives old enough to be your mom.

 

[grimacefetishist]

I need to ask what are some basic hobbies and places to go to that not only force me out in real life, but will have enough people around it's impossible to not socialize.

I need to learn to keep myself busy but also learn to interact with people after becoming too doomer and terminally online. I finally have to learn or else it'll never get better for me.

I go to the library. Stuff happens there sometimes

 

[DavidS877]

Canoeing? ... Hiking?

Canoeing is one of the few activities it's hard to do alone. Kayaking on the other hand is pretty easy solo.

I've never thought of hiking as a communal hobby. Put on some shoes, grab a bottle of water and some snacks and go for a long walk. If you pick the right places you'll not see many other people.

The biggest problem with hiking is if you take a woman with you then you have to hike back alone, so hopefully you remembered the way.

 

[Mayor Cody Travers]

@Yeeted Teet @Otterly @grimacefetishist

Thank you sincerely.

I've actually been far too good at being a homebody. I grew up in the boonies with just family. Even nominal times I was in more social areas or situations was still pretty rural, unfortunately, and a lot, the majority, of my people experiences end in disaster. So I'm extremely pessimistic right now. But I need to change, and not just let it be words.

I'm big into fitness - I have been since young - but trying to get over both my timidity and ego alike (even when I'm "not" in shape it's by my standards...but I always have to be as best as I can be, to compete, for example) is making me think on the sports thing. But also that I was so used to that homebody stuff means I never got out and did much, and now I couldn't quite say what "interests" me as a doing-kind of hobby. Martial arts does sound fun. I've had to -oh irony - learn to brawl and street fight over time to protect certain souls in my world but that's not exactly what anyone should be thinking of as a hobby. But I like the idea of a martial arts group. I'm always for more moving around and to keep pretending I'm 18 years old in terms of fitness. I especially need more cardio lately and not just the home gym, calisthentics, and weight-lifting stuff I do already.

I don't drink, but if I could find gatherings, groups, etc. I could probably "do" bars or pubs just fine as well even though I do not drink. I feel like that's sort-of what could work too. Just a place to talk to people that's meant to be social.

 

[umami's milk]

The biggest problem with hiking is if you take a woman with you then you have to hike back alone, so hopefully you remembered the way.

Wait why? What happens to her? Does she die at the finish? Does she get swooped and carried away by eagles? e.e

 

[suspended animation]

Wait why? What happens to her? Does she die at the finish? Does she get swooped and carried away by eagles? e.e

I took it as he murders her and buries the body, but I can see it from the perspective of the woman too: she ditches this loser on the hike upon finding the mountain man of her dreams living off the grid in a palatial log cabin. She lives happily ever after with her mountain man, thus forcing the hiker to return home alone.

 

[DavidS877]

I took it as he murders her and buries the body, but I can see it from the perspective of the woman too: she ditches this loser on the hike upon finding the mountain man of her dreams living off the grid in a palatial log cabin. She lives happily ever after with her mountain man, thus forcing the hiker to return home alone.

Ain't nobody want to carry a shovel for a hike in the woods, good shovels are heavy.

 

[suspended animation]

Ain't nobody want to carry a shovel for a hike in the woods, good shovels are heavy.

You don't want the body to be found too quickly, though, unless you really don't care if you're caught. An intact skeleton can lead to an ID; an identification can narrow down a timeline which could lead back to you (via local surveillance imagery, cell phone activity, etc). Animals will eventually disperse the remains, but there's no guarantee of when that will occur. The more flesh and clothing that are left on the body, the more likely the corpse will have trace evidence linking back to you.

You're going to have much better success if you bring tools with you, of one kind or another.

 

[Otterly]

but I always have to be as best as I can be

This stood out to me. Perfectionism is something that can do you well but can also hold you back. So can this idea that unless you’re going to succeed at something you won’t do it. It’s ok to start a sport you’re crap at, or mediocre at. In fact, if you’re going there to try to meet people, it’s probably better because you can ask for advice and guidance.

 

[bile demon]

It happened to me after 3 years together i literally got dumped month after his college graduation.

the only way for a woman to win is to not play. these women that you talk about have gone their own way. They say they want relationship and feign they are having hard life being single but in reality they do that because men will rag on them for daring to be happy without a man . There is no benefit to date a western male to a woman. Tehnically everything should be evenly split realistically though women get fucked by marriage and relationships statistics are showing it married men die richer and live longer and happier similar to forever single women . If someone has to make a sacrifice in the relationship is always the woman if someone gets dropped like a used cumrag due to illness , old age or vibe ( i am not joking ) in LTR is the woman. Women have seen that men have zero loyalty unless society penalizes it hard the statistic are showing it if you dont believe check the old statistic women having cancer vs men having cancer divorce rates this doesnt include cheating, abandonment etc. Go around and ask women who have been with their partner since college but never married what happened to their relationship when their partners income got extremly high count how many got cheated, dumped or fucked over .

"My boyfriend broke up with me... Billions must die."

 

[Justa Grata Honoria]

"My boyfriend broke up with me... Billions must die."
View attachment 5795992

After that break up i married , divorced and now partnered with a kid. I am just sharing experiences from woman perspective why women would not want to touch men with 10 foot pole. Learn to make a difference

Edit : if you haven't noticed most cynical women here are all married/ partnered with kids . Stan, me and fareal that i know of. Maybe there is a reason for it . Maybe the reason is you know men... Things to ponder on .

 

[Otterly]

After that break up i married , divorced and now partnered with a kid. I am just sharing experiences from woman perspective why women would not want to touch men with 10 foot pole. Learn to make a difference

Edit : if you haven't noticed most cynical women here are all married/ partnered with kids . Stan, me and fareal that i know of. Maybe there is a reason for it . Maybe the reason is you know men... Things to ponder on .

I’ve seen both ways. Lifelong marriages surviving the ups and downs and people leaving partners with shocking cruelty. Also men remarrying months after being widowed and women staying single for the rest of their lives.
People in general are disappointing.
I still believe that if you can find a partner who will stick through the ups and downs of life, it’s better than being single. But they have to be someone who is a quality partner and there seem to be fewer these days
Marriage has always been an odd combination of love, optimism and hard economic calculation. It’s there to protect the weaker party financially, to ensure that there’s a framework for raising offspring you know are yours, and as a vehicle to amass wealth and property. The fact that divorce is no longer penalised by society has led to people just checking out as soon as things get tough. Personally I’d like to see easy no-fault divorce gone and society put more emphasis on thinking about it before you get married and sticking with it. That would mean you needed a reason for divorce and that would be all the usual old stuff - cruelty, abandonment and adultery. There’s a lot that needs doing with the Uk child support as well. I know a couple of women where the partner fucked off, left them with the kids and has managed to ‘become unemployed’ and so has a token child support payment that about covers school lunches and nothing else.
With all that said, happy marriage trumps being single