DSP Plays Balding Gate 3

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When will Phil ragequit BG3?

  • Two Streams

    Votes: 37 17.9%
  • Four Streams

    Votes: 64 30.9%
  • Eight Streams

    Votes: 30 14.5%
  • When he kills himself

    Votes: 76 36.7%

  • Total voters
    207
Kat fat.
Phil gay.

"Halsin no stop that tickles! I'm marr-AAAAAAAAH"
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Getting gay married to Halsin makes enduring this shit worth it all in the end. Guess that's what happens when you avoid female characters at any possible moment Phillip.
phil is now saying that Emperor is evil and is mind controlling everyone and he knows this because he watched a cutscene online that he didn't get in game. i have no fucking idea what he's talking about, but the gist is apparently phil has been looking up story stuff offline. "he says in the cutscene that he will dominate you. i didn't get the cutscene, but that's what he does."
So he retconned his whole LARP about playing the game blind yet again. Why does this retard even bother pretending he doesn't look shit up still?
 
"it's not clear what this is. it's stupid. why can't I tell what this circle is? another new game mechanic, never explained, and I'm supposed to just know what the fucks going on. it could be a target or it could be a safe spot. i don't know. TELL ME HOW TO PLAY THE GAME, GAME, SO ANNOYING, SO FUCKING ANNOYING. it just wants to PISS me off. can I get a brain drunk?"
It's been awhile since I did the final stretch of the game, but IIRC, the circles Phil is talking about are just large red circles that indicate where the mindflayer ships are going to strike. I'm pretty sure the game outright tells you, but even if it doesn't, you'd think someone that's been playing video games for six days a week for the last 10+ years would have the basic gaming instincts to assume glowing red circle = something to avoid.

And also as a reminder, it's a turn based game, so it's not like these are last minute QTE style reflex tests, just don't end your turn in them. I vaguely remember enemies being cheeky and trying to move you into them, but until you reach the final fight, you're basically beating up minions that shouldn't pose a threat to your overpowered party.
phil is now saying that Emperor is evil and is mind controlling everyone and he knows this because he watched a cutscene online that he didn't get in game. i have no fucking idea what he's talking about, but the gist is apparently phil has been looking up story stuff offline. "he says in the cutscene that he will dominate you. i didn't get the cutscene, but that's what he does."
The Emperor is an interesting character, and there's usually a lot of discussion about his morals/motives and where he fits in on the D&D alignment chart. The cutscene Phil is referring to is a dialogue moment where you basically choose the most insulting options and Emperor lashes out and insinuates (possibly outright threatens) that he could just mind control you into beating the big bad if you refuse to work with him. Honestly, I think it's kinda poorly written and fairly out of character for the Emperor, but it's basically along the lines of "my dad can beat up your dad" level of insulting. No mind controlling actually takes place. And to cap off Phil not understanding anything about the game...if you don't ally with the Emperor, he gets mind controlled himself, so for the final stretch of the game he's literally just a thrall to the elderbrain, so he's not mind controlling anyone.
 
if you're 140 hours into a game you just want to finish it. you don't want to learn new mechanics, it's so dumb."
Phil not realizing that the only reason he's "140 hours" into the game is basically because he takes 30 minutes to read chat every time he has to make a decision will never not be funny to me, along with the fact that he always gets angry and confused that there are people who play games to actually play and enjoy them, not rush through them as fast as possible.
 
Phil not realizing that the only reason he's "140 hours" into the game is basically because he takes 30 minutes to read chat every time he has to make a decision will never not be funny to me, along with the fact that he always gets angry and confused that there are people who play games to actually play and enjoy them, not rush through them as fast as possible.
What's really confusing to me is that, unlike Divinity, I think BG3 is actually designed in a way where Phil's typical playstyle could work. With all the little tweaks they made to the rules, it really gave fighting characters a significant boost, and there's a few variations of the basic "tank everything and hit it really hard" builds that require almost minimal effort and setup that can pretty handily sweep through the game. It's just for the majority of players, part of the fun comes from all the possible ways to approach and solve problems, so Phil was really making things harder looking for handholding instead of making a pure fighter, giving him the biggest weapon available and basic attacking his way through the game. Don't get me wrong, he'd still drag it out to 140 hours because he's Phil, but I think he'd have a better experience with the game overall because it'd give him that instant sense of gratification he craves. Then again, in typical Phil fashion I'm sure he'd find a way to screw up even the most basic fighter build, given after 100+ hours he still hasn't mastered the simplest art of "click on the enemy to attack them."
 
Phil not realizing that the only reason he's "140 hours" into the game is basically because he takes 30 minutes to read chat every time he has to make a decision will never not be funny to me, along with the fact that he always gets angry and confused that there are people who play games to actually play and enjoy them, not rush through them as fast as possible.
Teach A Man To Fish and all that here. !40 hours of pure handholding and disguising it as play-by-play, thinking-out-loud commentary.

That stupid clickbait tier shit he pulled with "I thought of something that happened that no one else thought of and I was right!" that he kept to spill later that "Emperor was bad and I made the right choice!" as he smugly looks at the camera was the most in-line Phil bullshit. The reason he's so fuckin' astounded by it and has to make a deal out of it because he ended up having to look from outside sources to support his "correct" decision for something that didn't happen in his playthrough.

Meanwhile Karlach is in Avernus with Wyll(instead of replacing his dad as whatever in the city), Shadowheart last I saw died on a fuckin platform in the Mother Brain arena and still cannot swim(dude had a crisis over hugging her for fucks sake too), Astarion is probably crying downstairs, I'm assuming Lae'zel fucked off with her people, and Gayle is now a god which is okay for him but totally not Astarion being an ascended vampire. Now Halsin, the gay bear shit promo shit he bitched about, is sucking him off by a tree.

His whole run is so fuckin' invalidated that he latched onto this "Emperor bad because I looked it up and was right!". "There's no right answer" flies over his fuckin' head.

Also forgot to share Phil being afraid of platonically hugging Shadowfart.

Fag
 
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Is Phil really just so gay that even hugging a girl after her parents die to comfort her is anathema to him, or does Kat have such a stranglehold over his life that even the characters he plays aren't allowed to express any sort of interest in virtual women ever?
 
Did he at least gave Karlach a little touch when she had her engine fixed or did he pussy out of that as well?
 
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