Incel Death Note
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jul 11, 2023
Sure Phil, you "accidentally" got into a gay relationship with the tall muscular bear man. Whatever you say.
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even larian knowsphil has entered into a gay homosexual relationship with Halin, the Bear druid, by mistake and is now getting married.
So he retconned his whole LARP about playing the game blind yet again. Why does this retard even bother pretending he doesn't look shit up still?phil is now saying that Emperor is evil and is mind controlling everyone and he knows this because he watched a cutscene online that he didn't get in game. i have no fucking idea what he's talking about, but the gist is apparently phil has been looking up story stuff offline. "he says in the cutscene that he will dominate you. i didn't get the cutscene, but that's what he does."
It's been awhile since I did the final stretch of the game, but IIRC, the circles Phil is talking about are just large red circles that indicate where the mindflayer ships are going to strike. I'm pretty sure the game outright tells you, but even if it doesn't, you'd think someone that's been playing video games for six days a week for the last 10+ years would have the basic gaming instincts to assume glowing red circle = something to avoid."it's not clear what this is. it's stupid. why can't I tell what this circle is? another new game mechanic, never explained, and I'm supposed to just know what the fucks going on. it could be a target or it could be a safe spot. i don't know. TELL ME HOW TO PLAY THE GAME, GAME, SO ANNOYING, SO FUCKING ANNOYING. it just wants to PISS me off. can I get a brain drunk?"
The Emperor is an interesting character, and there's usually a lot of discussion about his morals/motives and where he fits in on the D&D alignment chart. The cutscene Phil is referring to is a dialogue moment where you basically choose the most insulting options and Emperor lashes out and insinuates (possibly outright threatens) that he could just mind control you into beating the big bad if you refuse to work with him. Honestly, I think it's kinda poorly written and fairly out of character for the Emperor, but it's basically along the lines of "my dad can beat up your dad" level of insulting. No mind controlling actually takes place. And to cap off Phil not understanding anything about the game...if you don't ally with the Emperor, he gets mind controlled himself, so for the final stretch of the game he's literally just a thrall to the elderbrain, so he's not mind controlling anyone.phil is now saying that Emperor is evil and is mind controlling everyone and he knows this because he watched a cutscene online that he didn't get in game. i have no fucking idea what he's talking about, but the gist is apparently phil has been looking up story stuff offline. "he says in the cutscene that he will dominate you. i didn't get the cutscene, but that's what he does."
he slipped and fell on steves dick, nothin he could do!Didn't he also "accidentally" get buttfucked by Steve in one of his Mass Effect 3 playthroughs?
Phil not realizing that the only reason he's "140 hours" into the game is basically because he takes 30 minutes to read chat every time he has to make a decision will never not be funny to me, along with the fact that he always gets angry and confused that there are people who play games to actually play and enjoy them, not rush through them as fast as possible.if you're 140 hours into a game you just want to finish it. you don't want to learn new mechanics, it's so dumb."
WHAT THE FUCK WOOOOOAHHH WOAAAAAH!!!!
What's really confusing to me is that, unlike Divinity, I think BG3 is actually designed in a way where Phil's typical playstyle could work. With all the little tweaks they made to the rules, it really gave fighting characters a significant boost, and there's a few variations of the basic "tank everything and hit it really hard" builds that require almost minimal effort and setup that can pretty handily sweep through the game. It's just for the majority of players, part of the fun comes from all the possible ways to approach and solve problems, so Phil was really making things harder looking for handholding instead of making a pure fighter, giving him the biggest weapon available and basic attacking his way through the game. Don't get me wrong, he'd still drag it out to 140 hours because he's Phil, but I think he'd have a better experience with the game overall because it'd give him that instant sense of gratification he craves. Then again, in typical Phil fashion I'm sure he'd find a way to screw up even the most basic fighter build, given after 100+ hours he still hasn't mastered the simplest art of "click on the enemy to attack them."Phil not realizing that the only reason he's "140 hours" into the game is basically because he takes 30 minutes to read chat every time he has to make a decision will never not be funny to me, along with the fact that he always gets angry and confused that there are people who play games to actually play and enjoy them, not rush through them as fast as possible.
Thank you for your service and, I wonder how much time I have before he goes back to Final Fantasy...I like seeing his fucked gameplay, so I'd encourage anyone here, if phil is playing a game you like and know a lot about, try this out for yourself. I know I'd certainly enjoy reading it
Teach A Man To Fish and all that here. !40 hours of pure handholding and disguising it as play-by-play, thinking-out-loud commentary.Phil not realizing that the only reason he's "140 hours" into the game is basically because he takes 30 minutes to read chat every time he has to make a decision will never not be funny to me, along with the fact that he always gets angry and confused that there are people who play games to actually play and enjoy them, not rush through them as fast as possible.
yesIs Phil really just so gay