Warhammer 40k

They  might have a go with the Skaven but they'd be pretty low on the totem pole even there. Woketards are pretty much only ever useful as puppets and proxies in the grand scheme of things.
Edit: you know what, genestealer cults are their thing. That suits them perfectly.

You know, I honestly forgot the Genestealers were a thing; admittedly, I'm not the most into W40K in comparison to other games, so I tend to forget things.

Taking a look, though... yeah, the Genestealers fit. Given their fondness for infiltrating everything and trying to rot the Imperium from within, I could easily see the woketards fighting for them.
 
How can you even make guro of skitarii? They are half toaster. Isn't it just like taking a droid or your old car apart?
There's a specific fetish called "mechabare" or such in Japan for when you take a robot girl apart and they have metal boobs underneath or something. Variations include, say, the legs being cut off.

As the other poster said, people will whack it to anything.
 
They  might have a go with the Skaven but they'd be pretty low on the totem pole even there. Woketards are pretty much only ever useful as puppets and proxies in the grand scheme of things.
Edit: you know what, genestealer cults are their thing. That suits them perfectly.
I'll say it I said it to most of my friends Jean steeler Colts are on ironically communist they promise you utopia and then a star God will magically fix all your problems and kill all the big bad meanies instead you just turned into bio soup for an uncaring war machine

Malice​

is the God of copyright law because GW doesn't own the likeness to him because the artist who created him for some reason was able to finagle into his contract that he owns all the rights.

Sadly GW is more interested in diversity and inclusion consultants then paying this guy maybe a small amount of money in order to have the return of the anti chaos god basically all he does is hate every single other God in existence and wants his followers to kill all of them and the followers he also fights alongside of his followers as long as you sacrifice enough virgins



also why is every single perpetual whose friends with the emperor die horribly like they should be able to body at least a few of the prime marks if the DNA was created from them.
Either they're extremely powerful psychic beings who should be the equivalent of at least three of the Primark so they're
not it's really stupid to build up these mythical beings and now they just get their ***** kicked by this guy who was created from the DNA for
reasons also they can't fight off basic ***** space marines


There's a specific fetish called "mechabare" or such in Japan for when you take a robot girl apart and they have metal boobs underneath or something. Variations include, say, the legs being cut off.

As the other poster said, people will whack it to anything.
Wasn't there world champion of Smash Bros who was a black furry into that ship I remember that being a massive controversy and him screaming about the Republicans and then people digging that up about him
the point is that people are into that **** are just sick freaks like I don't really care if you **** *** to something crap but seriously what is attractive about mutilating people I don't get it and I can get any sexual fetish










also the cabal was a fun idea but they never went anywhere with it so it just doesn't exist anymore also all the other crazy imperial conspiracies but that would require actually good writing something which the new batch of GW writers are incapable of
 
Last edited:
There's a specific fetish called "mechabare" or such in Japan for when you take a robot girl apart and they have metal boobs underneath or something. Variations include, say, the legs being cut off.

As the other poster said, people will whack it to anything.
40k-doge-youre-too-horny-guardsman-sergeant-smack-his-nuts.jpg
 
But the gods of Chaos have a certain honesty to them, do well, honor your powers, bring destruction (the message of chaos resonantes through the greatest acts of destruction), be vigilant, cultivate a court of rivals and loyalists and you’ll get candy bars from your patrons(s) and eventually immortality and a permanent (unless you fuck it up) existence in the Great Game with legions of daemons at your beck and call. I’ll take that over dying for a Redditor on a golden toliet any day.
Not really in 40K, where they seem to love inflicting ironic fates on their warriors or arbitrarily decide the warriors failed them.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Michael Wade
Hello gents. I'd like to start painting Guard minis and would like some basic tips from people who actually play the game and not just run a YouTube channel.

Tips regarding painting, primarily, as I'm not very artistically inclined.
The standard older style speedy tabletop ready method for infantry:

Assemble and glue the models but don't glue them to the bases yet. Use plastic glue, Citadel brand is fine. I prefer to paint the arms separately before gluing them on but it's a personal thing. Not gluing everything makes the details a lot easier to paint but the overall process is a bit fiddlier. *By detaching the models from the bases it's easier to paint the feet, legs, crotch etc. By leaving off the arms it's easier to paint the torso and "inside" parts of the weapon. But because these bits aren't readily visible you can potentially skip this and glue everything at the start if you don't care. But of course you care, you wouldn't be here if you didn't.*
Attach to base with blu-tak, paint a layer of thinned PVA glue on the base (you must clean your brush thoroughly after doing this - ideally use a dedicated supercheap and nasty brush just for this purpose) and then dunk it in sand and tap off the excess.
Undercoat white using a cheap acrylic spray. Try to keep this layer thin, it's better to miss a few nooks than douse the miniature in paint at this point.
Leave to dry for 24 hours.
You should add another layer of thinned PVA to the base while it's drying to seal in the sand a bit. *Or just use a special basing paint instead of basing material, it's a good time saver and you do it during the painting step*.

You'll want to use decent sable hair round tipped brushes, nothing too expensive required. Don't get the ones with the superlong handles, those are for painting on canvas. At a minimum you'll want a size 1 and a size 0 brush, probably a 00 or 000 as well for the smaller details. Novices tend to do better with smaller brushes .You can also get an acrylic-haired size 2 or 3 for the wash process and another dedicated small brush for drybrushing, because this process wrecks the bristles.
You'll want to thin your paints. Every paint is a bit different in how you manage this. Sometimes it's okay to just wet your brush before dipping it in the "raw" paint, sometimes you need to add a drop or two of water to some paint on a palette and mix. Experiment a bit until you get a thin flowy liquid that coats "reasonably well". Again thinner is probably better than more coverage, because you can always add another coat, but too thin to the point it runs off like water isn't helpful.
Start by using white paint to touch up any spots you missed with the spray. Non-undercoated sections are a bitch to paint and always rub off so get em good now.
By batch painting ten miniatures at once by the time you've finished a coat on the last one the first one should be dry enough to add another coat.
After two coats of white touch ups you should be okay but keep at it to ensure you get all the raised areas. There should be basically no grey plastic visible once this is all dry. It's okay to use a slightly thicker paint to ensure you get the last spots which the thin paint pools away from. Don't paint the joints you'll need to glue later.

Did you pick a colour scheme yet? Assemble your colored paints - for example, light green for the uniform, dark green for the armour, brown for the boots and straps, grey for the weapons, flesh for the flesh god, gunmetal for highlighting the weapons, maybe gold or copper for doodads, and beige/bleached bone for highlighting the flesh. Keep it simple is the name of the game. Basically you want two colours, plus metal, leather and skin.
Now with your size 1 brush you want to paint the base uniform colour onto the body of each model. Don't worry about neatness or details, just get two thin coats of green (or whatever) on every part of the model that should be green. Repeat for the armor, trying not to get dark green on the uniform, then carefully paint the leather bits brown, metal bits grey and fleshy bits fleshy using your smaller brush.
*By using thinned paints over white you should be able to produce a "natural highlight" effect where the paint pools away from the raised areas as it dries, creating a relatively nice color gradient. The purpose of things like Speed Paint and Contrast paint is to simplify this process by "pre-thinning the paint for your convenience" but I'm too much of a grognard (boomer) for that newfangled crap.*
After this point you should have 10 minis with bight clunky looking base colors covering everything. They may look a bit mottled so touch up some spots but it's okay to have a bit of white showing on the raised details for that "natural highlight".
Now use your drybrush to highlight the weapons and grey bits with gunmetal and the skin with bleached bone (Ushabti Bone from Citadel) or a mixture of bone and flesh. Google how to drybrush, it's pretty straightforward and less is usually more.
Next you should glue the mini to the base and complete the assembly of the other parts now. *Getting plastic glue on painted areas is bad, try not to do that* After about 10 minutes drying time use your small brush to touch up all the painting mistakes and details etc you care about.

Then it's time to wash each miniature in Agrax Earthshade using you size 3 brush. Just go to town and slather the whole mini in goop, it'll look fine when it's dry trust me. You might get a few stains on the flatter areas but you can prevent that by "pushing" the wash off them into the crevices, or adding a highlight later.
Leave to dry for 24 hours, don't even think about trying to work on a mini with wet wash on it.
After it's all dry your unit is done except for the bases. You might want to re-apply some colors on some raised spots if the wash made them too dark but be sparing with this. I usually drybrush a metal highlight on the guns just to make them pop.

Paint the sand on the bases using a very thin "ground" colour you like and drybrush it with a layer of that colour mixed 2:1 with bone then a lighter touch mixed 1:1 with bone. Paint the rim of the base a nice solid color; You can use a thick coat for this because there are no details to obscure and you want nice solid coverage, because this is the part of the miniature that gets handled the most.
 
He’s too busy being better than all us dirty farmers, doing scholarly things like sucking cock and not making food for his kids.
I’m definitely going to try to work him into my next Dark Heresy game. A noble man with a tube of amasec set up next to his mouth that is also a sexual degenerate and refuses to eat causing the anti aging stuff to waver… yeah he’s going to be perfect to trick my group into thinking Slaanesh is in town while another force is in action.
 
I'm not even sure Skitarii should feel pain. Or robots in general.

Its like taking Robocop to the mech shop, unscrew his legs, put rocket legs back on.

So torturing them is like, they shouldn't even be bothered or in pain in the first place. May as well try to waterboard your friendly neighborhood stone lol.
 
  • Like
Reactions: ForTheHoard
So torturing them is like, they shouldn't even be bothered or in pain in the first place. May as well try to waterboard your friendly neighborhood stone lol.
You have to remember that a lot of these types grew up on anime stuff like Ghost in the Shell, which blurred the line between human and robot. Meaning that the robot would have a pain response they wouldn't be able to turn off, or they can be remote-controlled to do things they would not normally do.

It's just human women with metal bits for these kinds of fetishes.
 
Gotta be careful with that, the guardsman might also be into CBT.
The fact anti-SJW Disney movie ticket buying grifter faggots are already damage controlling for Henry Cavill. That tells me the Warhammer lore retcons probably is his fault for pushing for the amazon show.
How do grifters saying random shit have anything to do with what Cavill or amazon may or may not have done? The grifters aren't doing anything behind the scenes.

The video doesn't even make sense. It's been said by practically everyone working on The Witcher that they didn't like working with Cavill, and that Cavill kept trying to steer shit back to being more like the source material. We also saw what happens when the idiots making the show are allowed to go totally off the rails with that god awful spin off. But because Cavill was supposedly allowed to fix the scene with the horse gets killed off after managing to convince the crew that they wrote it wrong, how does that equate to Cavill fucking up warhammer? The only way that makes any sense, is if you were to assume these grifters have anything to do with anything, or have any sort of access... when we know damn well they don't.
 
Last edited:
You have to remember that a lot of these types grew up on anime stuff like Ghost in the Shell, which blurred the line between human and robot. Meaning that the robot would have a pain response they wouldn't be able to turn off, or they can be remote-controlled to do things they would not normally do.

It's just human women with metal bits for these kinds of fetishes.

Yeah its one of those "anime moments" that make zero sense. The entire point in having a robot soldier is that it doesn't feel pain and you can repair it. If it goes uppity you just switch it on and off until it behaves.
 
Bit late and very dumb, but I'm dying to ask with all of the wokeshit going on right now; which Chaos God do you guys think the woketards worship in the Warhammer-verse? My money is on Slaanesh, personally, but I could see them worshipping just about anything.
Slaanesh is the last person I'd see the woketards supporting. Woke people hate ''objectification'' and turning characters into sex objects; Slaanesh would not. He/she would support such things like hentai fully, which would trigger the libs when a Slaaneshi dungeon party has women naked and tied up, enjoying getting whipped and waiting to be railed by the next guy who walks in. Slaanesh being pro-degeneracy and tolerant of LGBT won't offset that.
 
Yeah its one of those "anime moments" that make zero sense. The entire point in having a robot soldier is that it doesn't feel pain and you can repair it. If it goes uppity you just switch it on and off until it behaves.
I think you'd actually want your bot to be able to feel pain or something analogous, you just don't want it to be overwhelmed by it like people can be. If it had no negative reaction to harm, it'd be constantly getting damaged in needless or pointless ways, similar how people who can't feel pain burn themselves because they can't feel heat.
 
Slaanesh is the last person I'd see the woketards supporting. Woke people hate ''objectification'' and turning characters into sex objects; Slaanesh would not. He/she would support such things like hentai fully, which would trigger the libs when a Slaaneshi dungeon party has women naked and tied up, enjoying getting whipped and waiting to be railed by the next guy who walks in. Slaanesh being pro-degeneracy and tolerant of LGBT won't offset that.
Slaanesh also supports the rule of the strongest, which just so happens to be genetically engineered supermen who treat their underlings like trash (even by Chaos standards) and in the recent book the Chals Lord even has “muses” which are exclusively women who strike his fancy
 
Slaanesh also supports the rule of the strongest, which just so happens to be genetically engineered supermen who treat their underlings like trash (even by Chaos standards) and in the recent book the Chals Lord even has “muses” which are exclusively women who strike his fancy
Exactly. Slaaneshi culture is far from the ''trans power'' BS that some left-wing 40K fans try to posit it as. It's a culture of rule by the strong, with a huge helping of sex appeal, so it's basically a rape culture. If a man sees an attractive woman, Slaanesh would advise him to seize her for himself. Which is the exact opposite of what SJWs want.
 
How do grifters saying random shit have anything to do with what Cavill or amazon may or may not have done? The grifters aren't doing anything behind the scenes.

The video doesn't even make sense. It's been said by practically everyone working on The Witcher that they didn't like working with Cavill, and that Cavill kept trying to steer shit back to being more like the source material. We also saw what happens when the idiots making the show are allowed to go totally off the rails with that god awful spin off. But because Cavill was supposedly allowed to fix the scene with the horse gets killed off after managing to convince the crew that they wrote it wrong, how does that equate to Cavill fucking up warhammer? The only way that makes any sense, is if you were to assume these grifters have anything to do with anything, or have any sort of access... when we know damn well they don't.
can someone like do everyone a favor and just tell all these grifter fuckers to piss off or very least introduce a shovel to their skulls.
 
Back