i got bottom surgery almost 2 years ago and as much as i love having a vagina compared to what i had before, it’s caused me nothing but constant problems.
i was pretty unhappy with my aesthetics until i got a revision a few months ago which has definitely helped with that. however, i’m still having problems. i’ve still not been able to have sex and dilating still feels tight and painful this far into it. i’ve even been to see my surgeon and she can’t help me. the nurse is now telling me i need to go down and see her but i can’t just keep going down to see them. i live a fair way away and it’s not easy for me to get there. i’m in my early 20s and i don’t drive.
i’m now being told i need to douche daily for the rest of my life. i thought douching made things worse, and i really fucking hate doing it because it feels like this horrible painful pressure inside me.
i honestly feel like the only thing that’s going to fix this is getting a ppt or colon revision, but i just don’t have the money for that so i feel completely stuck. i’m supposed to be enjoying being young and this has left me suicidal and unable to enjoy my life. i’m genuinely so miserable over it and it seems like there’s no solution in sight. i don’t know what to do

i thought i’d be loving my life by now with my new bits but i’m far from it. please help if you can i feel so stuck.