Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta - Polysubstance enthusiast, "Lawtuber" turned Dabbleverse streamer, swinger, "whitebread ass nigga", snuffs animals for fun, visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold who lost his license to practice law. Wife's bod worth $50. The normies even know.

[Himedall All-seeing Waifu]

Kurt's high IQ which is probably why he used to drink too much and sperged out at fat married mom who suggested he flirt at public businesses with women to meet someone (he would be tazed)

he farmed away and is actually further along in his redemption arc than rackets who marginally held onto things with Kurt when others were alienated by his sexually frustrated rage

ancient history but during the Depp era Kurt was one of the karens that jumped on with Bytes to ouster DUIguy for soyfacing in the courtroom - the propriety politics he was party to whipped him in the face months later - in Kurt's defense he and the other legalfags prioritized their standing as court officials and didn't want to jeopardize their own shit at all, so they were completely allergic to any Humanity from DUIguy

The whole thing was retarded and gay. I hated that arc.

No, "4-5 shows a week" was all he said.

So assuming those are just his main shows he has now promised 16-20 of those for May, plus 14 Locals streams, plus two podcasts of unannounced number of episodes that may or may not count towards the Locals streams, plus another podcast if Dick takes pity on him.

Well, if Direct Examination, is a clue, he might only have to do 2 installments of his podcasts, so 16-20 shows, 14 LOCALS shows, and 4-6 podcast episodes.

 

[AltisticRight]

View attachment 5944639
Hello, my name is Officer Joshua Moon. Uh, I mean... Sun. MoonSun? Monson. Yes, that'll do.
Do you know why I pulled you over today? It's because I need more content for my stream.
Uh. What I meant to say is, "I am discontent with your speed."

>ehhhh officer, I already did speed today, three lines in fact
>you... what?

 

[Truly Rural]

Idk about Nick's friendship with Kurt but during Nick's show and later on his own Kurt behaved like a real friend would toward Nick. Nick on the other hand wasn't a friend to Kurt, he was just trying to absorb him into his stupid show like a puppet without personality. If Nick truly considers himself Kurt's friend he would be humbled by Kurt's mild and friendly criticism. But for whatever reason I expect him to impotently seethe about it instead. Probably because I view him as too egocentric to have friendships.

 

[Spaded Dave]

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From the rarely used Rekieta Law Facebook page. They look as gaunt as each other.

"Look at me, attending an event where people are donating money. That's like ME donating money. Yes...I've raised a million dollars tonight!"

This is the shit that makes me hate social media. I don't know if it creates narcissists or just gives them an outlet to expose themselves, but I'd rather they all go back in the closet regardless. Fuck it, I initially typoed "retardless" but I'm going to keep it. That too.

 

[Pippa's Greasy KB]

>ehhhh officer, I already did speed today, three lines in fact
>you... what?

Cop: How would you feel if you weren't speeding today?
Nick: But I did speed today, officer!

 

[daffodils]

"Look at me, attending an event where people are donating money. That's like ME donating money. Yes...I've raised a million dollars tonight!"

He was probably there to represent his parents, who must have donated a good deal:

It was a black tie event, so Nick was dressing like a spaz again. Wonder if he went with the studded belt.

https://wish.org/minnesota/wish-ball-gala-0

 

[Pippa's Greasy KB]

It's an annual thing that he's been attending but I haven't seen the recaps listing it as something he mentioned. Did I miss it? He usually likes to brag about for like a week or two in every stream leading up to the actual event.

 

[Captain Manning]

Circling back to this for just a moment...

Rekieta's streams are actually make a lot less sense than the clips themselves, as crazy as they are. The clips actually give a distorted sense of how disjointed and bizarre his streams are because he does his random access humor constantly throughout the show.

It will go from the actual topic, to a random access humor tangent, which potentially may lead to additional further tangents on its own before he reluctantly goes back to the topic briefly. If you're just looking at the clips you might assume that there was something that legitimately brought up what he was talking about. In reality his comedy bits are so forced that if he's reached the point where he thinks some random access humor is called for and he doesn't have one on hand, he will pause until he can think up a punchline.

It actually feels like he's basically auditioning his content for his podcast with Dick.

Since you've apparently watched a full Rekieta stream lately, would you agree with the idea that @elb is not "clipping out of context" because there is no context?

"Clipping out of context" is a common cope from the Balldo Brigade. That there is somehow context to his lunacy, when there really isn't.

 

[Gorton Colu]

View attachment 5944533
From the rarely used Rekieta Law Facebook page. They look as gaunt as each other.

Nice grimace, stupid.

Poor Kayla, rapid weight loss and cosmetic surgery has prematurely aged her 10 years.

 

[AnOminous]

View attachment 5944533
From the rarely used Rekieta Law Facebook page. They look as gaunt as each other.

Hide the pain Nicki.

 

[ChromaQuack]

View attachment 5944533
From the rarely used Rekieta Law Facebook page. They look as gaunt as each other.

I can't believe Nick got to meet Willem Dafoe doing drag at the make a wish ball.

Lady Rackets is reverting back to her Skaven phenotype, yes-yes.

Pills, warpstone, what's the difference really?

 

[Harm]

View attachment 5944533
From the rarely used Rekieta Law Facebook page. They look as gaunt as each other.

Oh neat, I had recently heard the clip of him talking about last year's Make-a-Wish ball and explaining how he used to look down on Make-a-Wish because all they did was take dying children to Disneyland and that's so cliché. Could you imagine? Dying children going to Disneyland instead of dying lawyers going to Hedonism II?

I wonder if we'll get a rant similar to his Christsplaining where he tells us all about how all the people at these events are shallow scumbags who don't actually do anything of value (unlike Nick, of course).

 

[Ice Gun Ninja]

Hello, my name is Officer Joshua Moon. Uh, I mean... Sun. MoonSun? Monson. Yes, that'll do.
Do you know why I pulled you over today? It's because I need more content for my stream.
Uh. What I meant to say is, "I am discontent with your speed."

 

[IDF]

Fuck it and fuck you. I thought the Denny's but was funny when I heard it on MATI. Maybe audio only helped, not sure but the interplay and contrast between the two opposing forces represented in Kurt and Balldo had me yuckin it up.

I am discontent with your speed.

I can hear that in his voice.

 

[Captain Manning]

This is interesting...

Mersh is claiming Rumble isn't happy with the content he and Royce have been doing.

Mind you, Mersh has been actually been pulling better numbers than Nick, so I'm wondering if they weren't happy with Mersh, how happy could they have been with Nick?

 

[Anticipointment]

It's kind of unfortunate that Kirk has one of the most homosexual voices on a man I've ever heard because it makes hin sound like he's whining about le hecking racism even when I 100% side with him on Rekieta being a slimy cunt.

Kurt has one of the most homosexual voices? You’ve heard Rekieta speak. Now compare.
Nick’s voice oozes faggotry.

 

[Maude Snew]

Pills, warpstone, what's the difference really?

Warpstone doesn't make you neglect your children to a point where your husband's gay lover has to come over to heat up canned crap for them.

 

[Sharpeteer]

View attachment 5944533
From the rarely used Rekieta Law Facebook page. They look as gaunt as each other.

What the fuck man. Every time we see her it gets worse. What is that on her forehead? I've never seen a forehead vein do that shape before. And what is that collar bone sticking out so far for?

And why does she pose for photos using that same psycho smile/facial expression that only the likes of hoes on something would approve? Even Nick at least tried to take a decent picture here.

I say she needs another surgery to fix these things pronto. Ask your parents to donate for this much needed and noble cause. Maybe even start a GoFundMe, I'm sure it'll go great.

View attachment 5944639
Hello, my name is Officer Joshua Moon. Uh, I mean... Sun. MoonSun? Monson. Yes, that'll do.
Do you know why I pulled you over today? It's because I need more content for my stream.
Uh. What I meant to say is, "I am discontent with your speed."

Hahaha. Good work fren.

"Look at me, attending an event where people are donating money. That's like ME donating money. Yes...I've raised a million dollars tonight!"

This is the shit that makes me hate social media. I don't know if it creates narcissists or just gives them an outlet to expose themselves, but I'd rather they all go back in the closet regardless. Fuck it, I initially typoed "retardless" but I'm going to keep it. That too.

I agree with you there. I don't have any regular social media accounts, and it's nice. Besides, you lovable buncha alogs are all the internet I can handle.

While I'm not certain whether or not he's just there because of his parents' donation or not, I hate posts like that.

 

[Get the rope Macaulay!]

What I meant to say is, "I am discontent with your speed."

autistic streaming traffic cop is my new favorite character.

 

[Space Pope]

View attachment 5944533
From the rarely used Rekieta Law Facebook page. They look as gaunt as each other.

They can't even feed their own kids yet are using their trust fund money to go hobnob? Which piece of art did they spend Grandpa Rekieta's money on this time?









@Doctor John B. Zyklon

Not to nose guard, but some of you niggers really need to learn to drive. Depending on conditions, 80 in the wet is just fine. Jesus you're all like soccer moms here.

I think just on it's own it might seem pedantic or Karen Farmsy to criticize 80 in a 65. However, he has shown he can't handle that car, he had his kid with him and when he was pulled over at 6:45am he at most had 90 minutes of sleep after streaming that night with JuJu and some others until 4:45am his time, where he started the night drinking on stream.