Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta - Polysubstance enthusiast, "Lawtuber" turned Dabbleverse streamer, swinger, "whitebread ass nigga", snuffs animals for fun, visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold who lost his license to practice law. Wife's bod worth $50. The normies even know.

[Bowl of Ramen]

Rekieta, do something funny. These retards are arguing about talking to pets now so that's a pretty big indicator that we need content before someone starts talking about how their dog knows how to set up a tripod.

I don’t see why this is a verboten subject on Nick’s thread. He talks to ceiling cats all the time.

 

[Train Operator]

Yeah, there's a few cows with threads that, for whatever reason, seem to attract the biggest neghole pozzers, and it's annoying.

DSP, Wings, and Patrick seem to be the big three.

cyraxx also gets a (dis)honorable mention. it's sad, i really think all four of those guys are funny to laugh at and i'd love to talk about them, but you go to their threads and you're just met with actual psychopaths. It makes it not fun anymore.

 

[Potatoherder]

A day late and a dollar short. Kurt would have been a perfect guest for this topic but Nick felt it better for Kurt to listen to racist 'jokes'.

 

[Dr Naomi Hunter]

A day late and a dollar short. Kurt would have been a perfect guest for this topic but Nick felt it better for Kurt to listen to racist 'jokes'.

He also had to listen to Nick’s attempt at humour with cops ordering at Denny’s.

 

[Guntkvd]

It looks like some shitty Midwestern morning zoo show invited a retarded homeless man from the streets to feed him for a bit.

 

[feral cat #6385]

He also had to listen to Nick’s attempt at humour with cops ordering at Denny’s.

If Nick wants to have a funny show, he should go back to page 950 and read his thread out loud during the stream, for the whole time he streams. No other content. Just Nick reading his thread. Every night. Comedy gold.

 

[Retink Retunk]

He also had to listen to Nick’s attempt at humour with cops ordering at Denny’s.

Haven't you ever ordered at a Denny's and looked at the cop in the other booth and thought to yourself you want to fuck the wood paneling off of his mother's car?

 

[Captain Manning]

I don’t see why this is a verboten subject on Nick’s thread. He talks to ceiling cats all the time.

Yeah, and he also drunkenly rants about butter dishes for 20 minutes, but we are not animals, damn it, we are people! Etc. Etc.

 

[Nate Higgers]

“Aw no dude Nick’s doin fine, he’s just got 5 kids and they’re running around all over the place”

This makes no fucking sense and it’s a goddamn bold faced lie. He has (had?) the money for a fucking nanny/au-pair, he’s a non practicing lawyer (not showing up to court for Steel Toe Cuck Show’s traffic ticket doesn’t count as practicing law), there’s video evidence of Nick saying “aw dude the kids were up at 12:30 at night on their iPads while Lady Balldo was passed out in a Xanax-and-muffin coma watching Star Trek”, and the Steel Toe Bugman has even said “aw dude I was at Rekietas house and him and Lady Balldo were “busy doing something and they didn’t have time to make the kids food so the kids were like “CAN SOMEONE MAKE US SOME FOOOOOOD”” so he goes and heats them up a $1.29 can of fucking Spaghetti-O’s. It’s almost making me MATI, these people are lying every second of every moment that they get asked about their degenerate behavior and its consequences and I’m getting so annoyed and disgusted with the smug passé response from them whenever anyone is asking them about things that they themselves have revealed.

Nick doesn’t even sleep more than 1-3 hours a night and he spends all his waking hours starving himself and binge drinking in equal amounts. He doesn’t have the energy or the sobriety to “take care of the house and 5 kids all day”. He’s looking gaunt and ragged because he’s boozing and starving and balldo’ing. His wife has literally no responsibilities outside of the house and the children but we’re supposed to believe that Nick Rekieta, the manorexic alcoholic pervert, has taken it upon himself to be the proverbial Sisyphus of The House of Balldo and cook, clean, wash, and take his kids to “late night computer activities” when he’s not banging escorts from The Twin Cities or romping around with that soft blob-faced Great Value Anthony Cumia Imitator, Aaron “No Wife Orgasms” Imholte?

It’s all so tiresome and I wouldn’t be so exasperated and irritated with the constant lies, dissembling, and half-truths if they didn’t have five kids in the mix, regardless of who’s allegedly “taking care” of them.

 

[AltisticRight]

Bingo card progress.
One is complete, the other two are well on their way.
Card 4 is my own.

 

[Himedall All-seeing Waifu]

Rekieta, do something funny. These retards are arguing about talking to pets now so that's a pretty big indicator that we need content before someone starts talking about how their dog knows how to set up a tripod.

If there's one thing you can count on him for, it's to fuck up. It's a guarantee. If he isn't right now, it won't be long.

Nick is like Greer. There will always be more content. Perennial LOLcow.

Okay but why not both

Jessie PS will be on with STMS tonight, could get interesting idk.
“It's the final Evening Show of the week and it's Aaron solo with a special guest at 9pm! JESSE PS FROM PODAWFUL joins us!

We also have plenty of news to talk about, dirt to kick up, gossip to spill. It's going to be a great show! You'll enjoy it!”

And Aaron shared some interesting rekieta things last night. Says the farms is funny and 50/50, 60/40 on theories. I’m sorry but after making the clips summarizing them just feels like a lot of work

With a follow up clip from this morning.

His friend? Rick Nekieta? or Iiron Amholte? He mentions very specific things like drink timestamps.

Kiwi Farms does not go after families, like Aaron said. That is against the rules. He is no better than any low-IQ screecher about the 'Kiwi Kill Kount'.

Aaron also mentions 'aggressive monogamy' and credits Nick for the phrase (the tosser). I find it funny he picked that out of all things in the new OP to riff on.

With PodAwful, he returns to parroting Nick's lines about his schedule and the weird jokes about swinging that made people believe the rumours.

Good for him, his paypigs are scum anyway and so are his trolls.

Seeing the clip comparing his frustration at a BotW puzzle spliced with how easily a V-tuber solved it.

Aaron plays a much bigger part in the sequel. It's about 20% done. A lot longer too.

I am excited.

His wife has literally no responsibilities outside of the house and the children

Minor correction: she teaches art and music class (maybe more than one) at least one day a week, and Nick teaches on Thursdays for the co-op.

There is also a specific day of the week or two that the girls have dance classes for about 3-4.5 hours straight ( 1-1.5 hour sessions with different styles). Not getting more specific because (unlike Aaron says) we do not touch the families or children.

 

[AnOminous]

Nick doesn’t even sleep more than 1-3 hours a night and he spends all his waking hours starving himself and binge drinking in equal amounts. He doesn’t have the energy or the sobriety to “take care of the house and 5 kids all day”.

He doesn't take care of shit. His kids are starving. If his gay lover didn't open a can of Spaghetti-Os every day or so they'd die like Ethiopians.

What a worthless faggot.

 

[Sharpeteer]

It looks like some shitty Midwestern morning zoo show invited a retarded homeless man from the streets to feed him for a bit.
View attachment 5953888

Even simply knowing that this guy is into gay sweaty swinger shit with Nick Rekieta just makes him that much grosser.

“Aw no dude Nick’s doin fine, he’s just got 5 kids and they’re running around all over the place”

His lies have a lot in common with Nick's lies - they're incredibly bad, are held together with AIDS and crabs, and only the biggest balloonheads believe them.

While Aaron reads the thread (I bet my million Nick Rekieta wish dollars on it), much like Nick, he knows their fans don't, so it doesn't matter what he says, they're never going to check for themselves. They've literally said themselves they don't want to check the farms, so they need Nick (or I guess Aaron now) to tell them.

 

[AnOminous]

While Aaron reads the thread (I bet my million Nick Rekieta wish dollars on it), much like Nick, he knows their fans don't, so it doesn't matter what he says, they're never going to check for themselves. They've literally said themselves they don't want to check the farms, so they need Nick (or I guess Aaron now) to tell them.

Fun fact: you can ignore the facts the Farms tell. Like that there is a giant Mac truck coming directly at you.

Enjoy your ignorance, though. That truck is still going to run over your dumb ass. You are still getting splattered.

 

[Zbk3VmLfujjzjxBd43tL]

If Nick wants to have a funny show, he should go back to page 950 and read his thread out loud during the stream, for the whole time he streams. No other content. Just Nick reading his thread. Every night. Comedy gold.

It would take him 7 hours to get through a single page. He'd read half a post and start tardraging and going on long tangents about how we're just incel prudes and Scandinavians and he and Lady Rackets are totally monogamous and we're all jealous of his awesome sex life and money and family.

 

[Sharpeteer]

Fun fact: you can ignore the facts the Farms tell. Like that there is a giant Mac truck coming directly at you.

Enjoy your ignorance, though. That truck is still going to run over your dumb ass. You are still getting splattered.

You actually can ignore everything the Farms say. Just look at these guys, and listen to them for a little while. You don't even need to read anything here, just think "does this make sense? Does this guy look well? Why are all his absences coincidentally when things happen with Aaron and April?"

I think that's asking too much.

 

[Nate Higgers]

I think that's asking too much.

Asking for him to stop guzzling booze down his smug passive aggressive blowhole long enough to make a zoom court appearance for a fucking speeding ticket is asking too much. He’s such a cool and edgy and rebellious libertarian dude, why would he bend to the whims of the judge and her courtroom? That fat judge was probably a Scandinavian incel prude who hasn’t had sex since Steven Hawking could walk! If she was ever even skinny enough to be attractive enough to have sex!

 

[feral cat #6385]

It looks like some shitty Midwestern morning zoo show invited a retarded homeless man from the streets to feed him for a bit.

Yea his "show" looks horrible. He should go get a real job. He is about as funny as Nick.

That being said. He should stop lurking, register an account and join the conversation. He must want to vent about Nick fucking up the ticket.

(unlike Aaron says) we do not touch the families or children.

And Drexel. Pretty sure Nick has let many other kiddie touchers in his house.

It would take him 7 hours to get through a single page. He'd read half a post and start tardraging and going on long tangents about how we're just incel prudes and Scandinavians and he and Lady Rackets are totally monogamous and we're all jealous of his awesome sex life and money and family.

The ceiling cats will severely punish Nick if he stops reading. Every once in a while, he can look up pleadingly to the ceiling cats to let him stop. But they won't let him. And if he stops reading for longer than 10 seconds their eyes turn red, and his whole body will convulse in agony. Until he starts reading again. Nick will not be allowed to say anything other than what's on the page. He must read the thread to the very end. Only then will the ceiling cats grant him the relief of death.

 

[TherapyMan]

Yea his "show" looks horrible. He should go get a real job. He is about as funny as Nick.

I have not seen much Steeltoe, but I argue that Nick is substantially unfunnier than Aaron, despite Aaron completely lacking any actual comedic chops. Aaron is merely boring and not funny. Nick is painfully unfunny and terminally smug.

 

[Sharpeteer]

Asking for him to stop guzzling booze down his smug passive aggressive blowhole long enough to make a zoom court appearance for a fucking speeding ticket is asking too much. He’s such a cool and edgy and rebellious libertarian dude, why would he bend to the whims of the judge and her courtroom? That fat judge was probably a Scandinavian incel prude who hasn’t had sex since Steven Hawking could walk! If she was ever even skinny enough to be attractive enough to have sex!

Becoming an attorney, doing almost nothing with it for years, then finally you make your comeback, and you fail.

I have this super outlandish theory that's probably not true, but I like it a lot.

Spoiler: Lolbertarian Fanfiction

What if he blew off that hearing on purpose, all just to try and get one on the Gman by wasting the court's time? I realize that's out there, but so is a lot of stuff with this guy and his ways. He's such an adult-infant "I DO WAT I WANT" lolbert that I don't think it's completely out of the possibility that he got this idea to take a case that's so minor and pointless to spend anyone's time on, get a whole bunch of police, government/court time spent, then just no-show at the end, making all their time spent for nothing.

"HA! Take that Gman! I made you all do a bunch of work for nothing!!" You had to stay at work a little later than usual because of me!"