Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

  • 🐕 I am attempting to get the site runnning as fast as possible. If you are experiencing slow page load times, please report it.
Bixby Snyder said:
I bet he’s hiding his fucked up rotten mouth more than ever.
Click to expand...
He looks like an actual rotting corpse in his recent cameos. His mouth has gotten much worse, his jaw is so swollen that his entire head looks like an egg, and his lips are all purple and cracked in a lot of these. I know he brought this upon himself, but i still feel sorry for him. He's too stupid to realize how serious his condition is, or do anything to actually help himself. It's somewhat rare now, but people do still die via sepsis from tooth infections, especially diabetics. And a lot of these cases appear to be people that actually saw a dentist, something that Cobes isn't doing.

This cameo has a good shot of his teeth (NSFL).

Screenshot_20240512_173922_Chrome.jpg
Look at that noggin!
 
  • Informative
  • Like
  • Horrifying
Reactions: AmateurComedicTaxidermist, often puzzled, Judas Connor Moon and 9 others
bonified retard said:
He looks like an actual rotting corpse in his recent cameos. His mouth has gotten much worse, his jaw is so swollen that his entire head looks like an egg, and his lips are all purple and cracked in a lot of these. I know he brought this upon himself, but i still feel sorry for him. He's too stupid to realize how serious his condition is, or do anything to actually help himself. It's somewhat rare now, but people do still die via sepsis from tooth infections, especially diabetics. And a lot of these cases appear to be people that actually saw a dentist, something that Cobes isn't doing.

This cameo has a good shot of his teeth (NSFL).

View attachment 5983828
Look at that noggin!
Click to expand...
teeth update.PNG
And to think NAL kissed that dozens of times....
 
  • Horrifying
  • Like
  • Islamic Content
Reactions: AmateurComedicTaxidermist, Lesbian Sleepover, AleppoDeathSquad and 14 others
Agamemnon Busmalis said:
That is just plain fucked up.
Click to expand...
You say that but when 2 walking biohazards swap germs, scary shit happens that's unknown to science.
Slim Boglim said:
The bacteria colony jumped ship from Cobes gums to her pussy and it’s fermenting more yeast than a wonder bread factory. Better not use your girlfriend’s pussy sludge as sourdough starter BOY!
Click to expand...
If Nurgle ran a Wendy's, basically.
 
  • Agree
  • Like
  • Islamic Content
Reactions: Retreaded Tire, Judas Connor Moon, Crab Latte and 4 others
Bixby Snyder said:
I bet he’s hiding his fucked up rotten mouth more than ever.

It’s one thing to see him once a week, hear some funny antics, and remind him to wash his clothes. It’s another when he now sits across the table, chewing on one side of his mouth with obviously rotten teeth, drinking a Mountain Dew and beer. I wonder what kinda ‘food hacks’ he is concocting with dinner? You know he won’t just eat shit as is
Click to expand...
My money is on him being sequestered into the basement for the majority of the day, and whatever food he is given being hand delivered downstairs "So we don't interrupt you, we know you like doin' your thing!", I'd be quite surprised if he was integrated with the real family for any significant periods of time.
 
  • Thunk-Provoking
  • Agree
  • Like
Reactions: Retreaded Tire, Judas Connor Moon, Phalanges Mycologist and 7 others
Nana Feeder 9k said:
My money is on him being sequestered into the basement for the majority of the day, and whatever food he is given being hand delivered downstairs "So we don't interrupt you, we know you like doin' your thing!", I'd be quite surprised if he was integrated with the real family for any significant periods of time.
Click to expand...
I think so, it's a good-sized house, 5 bedrooms and 3.5 baths not counting anything in the basement. It's probably not too different an arrangement from the green basement overall.

Wendy's is also only a mile's walk away incidentally.
 
  • Optimistic
  • Like
Reactions: Judas Connor Moon, Ihatejackscalfani, Umaibae and 1 other person
behavioral swamp thang said:
Cobra has more fan art than just about any lolcow or even celebrity.
What is it about him that inspires creativity?
Click to expand...

Ignoring the new Zoomer TikTards, a large majority Cobros seem to come from or have some involvement in creative fields. Lots of artists, designers, writers, filmmakers, musicians, chefs etc. The only other Cobra followers I’ve encountered IRL (and there aren’t many, TMDNWU) also fit this bill.

Something about him attracts creative people. Many of us were probably drawn in by his non-goth goth posturing and stuck around for the pure insanity (and banality) of it. As others have mentioned, his unintentional comedic timing is a thing of beauty. Josh’s malapropisms are one of my favorite things about this ding dong.

I don’t think true normies understand his appeal. That’s why all the weens and “content creators” who’ve littered up the Cobra Universe as of late seem to “not get it,” for lack of a better phrase. Jord is not a Chris Chan-esque lolcow. He’s not there to be manipulated or poop touched. We just enjoy watching him do his regarded thing. It takes a certain person to understand the beauty of that.
 
  • Agree
  • Like
  • Feels
Reactions: Star Spangled Bogger, Mimitchi, Asmobaby and 23 others
Agares said:
And to think NAL kissed that dozens of times....
Click to expand...
She also let him go down on her. Now, I know the joke would be her pussy is more disgusting than his mouth, but honestly I doubt it. She actually bathes. Cobes' mouth is dirtier than most people's unwiped assholes.

It reminds me of other cows, Digitroon and Paedoparty. Digi, like Josh, didn't brush his teeth for months at a time and routinely went down on Meigh. That is like a guaranteed method of contracting BV. I'm sure after Josh ate up that wendy's you would be able to smell NAL coming before seeing, or even hearing her.
 
  • Horrifying
  • Like
  • Islamic Content
Reactions: AmateurComedicTaxidermist, Narwhal, Judas Connor Moon and 7 others
Umaibae said:
Ignoring the new Zoomer TikTards, a large majority Cobros seem to come from or have some involvement in creative fields. Lots of artists, designers, writers, filmmakers, musicians, chefs etc. The only other Cobra followers I’ve encountered IRL (and there aren’t many, TMDNWU) also fit this bill.

Something about him attracts creative people. Many of us were probably drawn in by his non-goth goth posturing and stuck around for the pure insanity (and banality) of it. As others have mentioned, his unintentional comedic timing is a thing of beauty. Josh’s malapropisms are one of my favorite things about this ding dong.

I don’t think true normies understand his appeal. That’s why all the weens and “content creators” who’ve littered up the Cobra Universe as of late seem to “not get it,” for lack of a better phrase. Jord is not a Chris Chan-esque lolcow. He’s not there to be manipulated or poop touched. We just enjoy watching him do his regarded thing. It takes a certain person to understand the beauty of that.
Click to expand...
Yeah, there's an unspoken value that come with him being such a "low burn" retard that makes it where the Cyraxx and Daniel Larson mongoloids stay clear the second their third-rate weenery doesn't immediately result in a screaming temper tantrum.
 
  • Like
  • Agree
  • Optimistic
Reactions: Judas Connor Moon, Captain Howdy 666, Phalanges Mycologist and 7 others
Umaibae said:
Ignoring the new Zoomer TikTards, a large majority Cobros seem to come from or have some involvement in creative fields. Lots of artists, designers, writers, filmmakers, musicians, chefs etc. The only other Cobra followers I’ve encountered IRL (and there aren’t many, TMDNWU) also fit this bill.

Something about him attracts creative people. Many of us were probably drawn in by his non-goth goth posturing and stuck around for the pure insanity (and banality) of it. As others have mentioned, his unintentional comedic timing is a thing of beauty. Josh’s malapropisms are one of my favorite things about this ding dong.

I don’t think true normies understand his appeal. That’s why all the weens and “content creators” who’ve littered up the Cobra Universe as of late seem to “not get it,” for lack of a better phrase. Jord is not a Chris Chan-esque lolcow. He’s not there to be manipulated or poop touched. We just enjoy watching him do his regarded thing. It takes a certain person to understand the beauty of that.
Click to expand...
Honestly Cobes is so much of his own thing that I don’t know if the “lolcow” classification really works. He’s in his own league of internet weirdo. Rather than a cow that needs to be milked Cobes is more akin to a chicken where you let him do his thing, keep him fed, keep him housed, keep him safe from predators and wait until it’s time to go collect the eggs (so you can then boil them in Mountain Dew)
 
  • Like
  • Agree
  • Winner
Reactions: JenkinsJinkies, Star Spangled Bogger, AmateurComedicTaxidermist and 30 others
Slim Boglim said:
Honestly Cobes is so much of his own thing that I don’t know if the “lolcow” classification really works. He’s in his own league of internet weirdo. Rather than a cow that needs to be milked Cobes is more akin to a chicken where you let him do his thing, keep him fed, keep him housed, keep him safe from predators and wait until it’s time to go collect the eggs (so you can then boil them in Mountain Dew)
Click to expand...
haha yesssth he's most definitely one of those goth chickens
goth-black-chicken-ayam-cemani-21.jpg
he's like my favorite rooster: comfortable in his territory, fucking any bitch he wants, and yelling to let everyone know how cool he is. He just doesn't wake up at 4am.
 
  • Like
  • Winner
  • Feels
Reactions: JenkinsJinkies, Star Spangled Bogger, Mimitchi and 30 others
anliteralidiot said:
haha yesssth he's most definitely one of those goth chickens
View attachment 5984909
he's like my favorite rooster: comfortable in his territory, fucking any bitch he wants, and yelling to let everyone know how cool he is. He just doesn't wake up at 4am.
Click to expand...
Goth roosters have a unique mating call that they only crow from 9pm to 3am.
 
  • Winner
  • Like
  • Islamic Content
Reactions: AmateurComedicTaxidermist, Lesbian Sleepover, The Judean People's Front and 18 others
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back