Horrorcow Cecily Kellogg / CecilyK / Uppercase Woman - unrepentant terrible human being liked by no one.

JudgingYou said:
It is impossible to have a conversation with Cecily Kellogg without oneupmanship on her part. No matter what you say or do, she's been there, done that. She absolutely cannot allow anyone to have a moment of glory without somehow making it about her.

It is also impossible to talk to Cecily without her bringing up her "haters." Regardless of the topic, Cecily will somehow work all her drama into the conversation. If you interview her for a job? She'll bring up her haters so you know that if you hire her to write for you, there will be hate readers who will comment and say mean things. Yeah, I'd hire that.

I know one person who roomed with Cecily at a conference and will never do it again. Despite agreeing to go in half, Cecily stiffed her roommate and never paid her back.

When Cecily's mother was sick and came to live with the family, Cecily made her live in their nasty basement. Turns out she was living out of trashbags for over a year because Cecily couldn't be assed to clear out a few drawers for her. Never mind making an old, infirmed woman climb the basement stairs every day. Why? Because she wanted to keep Tori "fucking safe." The whole time her mother lived there, Cecily and Charlie complained about her on social media.

Cecily was a "Disney Social Media Mom," a stupid invitation only status thing that Mommy bloggers cry over if they don't get an invitation The one and only time Cecily was invited, her family made it a road trip. Of course they didn't have enough money and Cecily had to borrow from her friend. It was never paid back. Charlie complained the whole time they were there because he's much better than Disney, which made the whole experience a stressful one for Tori.


The O'Hay's can't even have a fun family outing without turning it into drama and stress. They are the lowest of the low, and worst of the worst.
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Intriguing. Can you site your sources?
 
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A seven year old dropping F-Bombs like a B-52. Real quality parenting there. It's pretty obvious Cecily and Charlie don't watch their language around their child. What's this fat cooze going to do next; give Tori a dildo for her 12th birthday? Start showing her porn for "sex education"? Cecily is a revolting, trashy person in every sense of the word. The Kelloggs may live on the east coast and consider themselves "liberal elite", but they act like they should be in a rust hole trailer park somewhere in Cousin Fucker, Alabama. The only difference between the Kelloggs and common white trash is the lack of meth mouth and no 1978 Chevy pickup truck up on cinder blocks in front of their home.
 
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glass_houses said:
Intriguing. Can you site your sources?
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There's stuff about her everywhere online.

Don't believe everything you read. The O'Hays are great parents!

Taking their daughter to play at exciting places like abandoned hotels on the way to Disney

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Charlie brings joy to every outing.

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Cecily is the picture of happiness and sparkly times

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Cecily was so excited for Tori to get to Disney she cut her out of the picture.
http://archive.is/Ek21K

But don't feel bad for Tori she might be able to go to Ikea one day.

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She has awesome new secondhand sheets from some random person on Craigslist

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And her mother managed to save some money after flying to conferences to get her a dirty secondhand keyboard!

https://www.instagram.com/p/xHS-b8JBGs/

Shh. Don't wake Charlie. He has a rough life.

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Charlie's donation button
http://archive.is/cCoA0
 
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JudgingYou said:
When Cecily's mother was sick and came to live with the family, Cecily made her live in their nasty basement. Turns out she was living out of trashbags for over a year because Cecily couldn't be assed to clear out a few drawers for her. Never mind making an old, infirmed woman climb the basement stairs every day. Why? Because she wanted to keep Tori "fucking safe." The whole time her mother lived there, Cecily and Charlie complained about her on social media.
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My favorite anecdote from this era was when Cecily discovered her elderly mother had struggled up the basement stairs carrying a chair, despite the fact that she had a broken arm. Cecily yelled at her, "Why didn't you tell me you needed to carry the chair upstairs?! I probably would have helped you!!" Yeah, probably. Mom wasn't holding her breath on that one, so instead just did her best with a broken arm.

This is a photo of Cecily and her mother back in the day. Guess how old they are here? (Answer below.)

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If you guessed that these women are the same age, you are wrong. Cecily's mother was 40, Cecily was 20. I don't know if this photo was before or after her mother committed these transgressions as blogged by Cecily, because that's what you do when you value your privacy and family relationships:
-When I told her that my husband asked me to marry him, she told me that I didn’t deserve him
-When I was twenty, she slept with a friend of mine that I was head over heels for (Jerry Springer, anyone?)
-She developed a habit of telling people, usually within 3.6 seconds of meeting them, that she is the survivor of ritual satanic incest
-She told me once that breastfeeding me turned her on
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exceptionalgoogle said:
My favorite anecdote from this era was when Cecily discovered her elderly mother had struggled up the basement stairs carrying a chair, despite the fact that she had a broken arm. Cecily yelled at her, "Why didn't you tell me you needed to carry the chair upstairs?! I probably would have helped you!!" Yeah, probably. Mom wasn't holding her breath on that one, so instead just did her best with a broken arm.

This is a photo of Cecily and her mother back in the day. Guess how old they are here? (Answer below.)

lvrqMlF.png


If you guessed that these women are the same age, you are wrong. Cecily's mother was 40, Cecily was 20. I don't know if this photo was before or after her mother committed these transgressions as blogged by Cecily, because that's what you do when you value your privacy and family relationships:


SIQoh2R.png
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Huh. So that's where she got it from.
 
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Just goes to show how childish these two are that when they're doing something that should be fun for their kid, they can't stop pouting and whining about how they're not having fun and how lame everything is. That's the kind of behavior you'd expect out of a petulant teenager being dragged along on a family trip, not two grown-ass adults on a paid vacation to Disneyland with their daughter.
 
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Backing up @JudgingYou and that excellent summary of shitty trip to Orlando, with The Blountville Story, as told by Charlie O'Hay, the most enlightened man ever to live.

Charlie has a lovely tendency to demonize the American South. He loves it when terrible storms or natural disasters tear up swathes of the South, even though the people who suffer the most when such things happen are the impoverished people of color he pretends to have solidarity with (Cecily has without sarcasm or irony has referred to her and Charlie as being part of the East Coast liberal elite).

But when he and Cecily drove to that Type A Conference in 2009, they couldn't afford it, yet took Tori along for the ride because why not? They ran out of money because Cecily didn't understand how debit cards and hotel holds work and only found this out when they stopped for gas and their card was declined. Confronted with this bump in the road, the two adults then decided it was time to shine, to show the world what the Kellogg-O'Hay duo was made of, and they overcame this unexpected snag with grace and dignity.

Hahaha, yeah fuck that, they behaved like absolute pieces of shit.

Charlie, being a lazy grifter did what grifters do - he immediately started panhandling. He spent his last five bucks buying Tori, a toddler at the time, fast food and still needed gas money so O'Hay held out his O'Hat and asked strangers to chip in. But never fear - even as Charlie begged for spare change, he didn't lose his sense of unearned superiority. When Charlie was panhandling in a fast food restaurant parking lot for enough money get gas, he couldn't help but mock the people he talked to. He was in Blountville, TN and one girl he spoke to pronounced it "Blunt-veal." He speculated as to when the last time a black person was lynched there, because the South does nothing but kill people of color.

And what was Cecily doing as her useless husband mocked the locals? Why, she was screaming and crying and having a complete meltdown in the parking lot as she demanded the hotel and bank release her money. But as she did this, she also immediately took to Twitter and begged friends for help. Because that's what's Twitter is for - to fund her fat ass because she's too dumb to understand basic things like hotels putting holds on credit and debit cards. But mostly Cecily just screamed and cried and cursed, causing a scene, until Tori became afraid and started to cry, too.

At least it prepared Tori for the emotionally savage trip to see the Mouse in Florida, where they again ran out of money and had to beg and beg to get back home.
 
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Dog Prom 3D said:
Backing up @JudgingYou and that excellent summary of shitty trip to Orlando, with The Blountville Story, as told by Charlie O'Hay, the most enlightened man ever to live.

Charlie has a lovely tendency to demonize the American South. He loves it when terrible storms or natural disasters tear up swathes of the South, even though the people who suffer the most when such things happen are the impoverished people of color he pretends to have solidarity with (Cecily has without sarcasm or irony has referred to her and Charlie as being part of the East Coast liberal elite).

But when he and Cecily drove to that Type A Conference in 2009, they couldn't afford it, yet took Tori along for the ride because why not? They ran out of money because Cecily didn't understand how debit cards and hotel holds work and only found this out when they stopped for gas and their card was declined. Confronted with this bump in the road, the two adults then decided it was time to shine, to show the world was the Kellogg-O'Hay duo was made of, and they overcame this unexpected snag with grace and dignity.

Hahaha, yeah fuck that, they behaved like absolute pieces of shit.

Charlie, being a lazy grifter did what grifters do - he immediately started panhandling. He spent his last five bucks buying Tori, a toddler at the time, fast food and still needed gas money so O'Hay held out his O'Hat and asked strangers to chip in. But never fear - even as Charlie begged for spare change, he didn't lose his sense of unearned superiority. When Charlie was panhandling in a fast food restaurant parking lot for enough money get gas, he couldn't help but mock the people he talked to. He was in Blountville, TN and one girl he spoke to pronounced it "Blunt-veal." He speculated as to when the last time a black person was lynched there, because the South does nothing but kill people of color.

And what was Cecily doing as her useless husband mocked the locals? Why, she was screaming and crying and having a complete meltdown in the parking lot as she demanded the hotel and bank release her money. But as she did this, she also immediately took to Twitter and begged friends for help. Because that's what's Twitter is for - to fund her fat ass because she's too dumb to understand basic things like hotels putting holds on credit and debit cards. But mostly Cecily just screamed and cried and cursed, causing a scene, until Tori became afraid and started to cry, too.

At least it prepared Tori for the emotionally savage trip to see the Mouse in Florida, where they again ran out of money and had to beg and beg to get back home.
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I guess that being part of the liberal elite means not having more than $100 in your bank account.
 
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Well they've got one bit about being the liberal élite right. The whole hating poor people because they're all uneducated peasants who need to be shown the error of their ways by superior middle class intellectual types, and without the beneficence of same they'd all become a burbling mass of racism, inbreeding, and fat.

(Which is kinda what Cecily is, to be fair.)

It's despicable, frankly. It's like the White Man's Burden but translated to wealth terms from race. Just as the excesses of colonialism were excused on the basis of uplifting the savages, so too are these antics asspatted on the basis of consciousness-raising amongst people who have to work for a living.
 
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Here is Cecily discussing in one of her oldest archived blog posts about herself and her family being white trash.

At least once a weekend, we go out to the suburbs (where the movie theaters are so much nicer than the city) and eat at some horrendous chain restaurant (I have an inordinate fondness for Cracker Barrel) and watch a terrible movie. Sometimes, if I’m lucky, I can even add in a trip to Target. Fortunately, we can blame all of this on genetics.

I’m half white trash, as is my husband. My father lives in the Southwest in a trailer, smokes three packs a day, and is a stand-on-the-corner-of-my-property-with-a-shotgun republican. My husband’s grandmother worked most of her life in an underwear factory, although his father managed to escape and become a rather well known investment banker and money pundit, and his mother is European. My mother has a PhD, as did her father. My grandmother got her master’s degree by the time she was 20 in 1926. My uncle is a lawyer. My half sisters both had children really young and live in houses with cars up on blocks in the front lawn.
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