Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

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Our boy is on a roll, smoking in his videos has unbound him! He's even reverting to his Terrance Popp phase


men are expected to;
pay for everything
>has no money
go to war
>doesnt go outside
build a house
>lives in a trailer owned by clint
fix the car
>doesnt own a car
do man shit!
>doesnt do any shit

oh yes we are back
 
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>has no money
>doesnt go outside
>lives in a trailer owned by clint
>doesnt own a car
>doesnt do any shit

oh yes we are back
> has all the tacticool soap to steal all the ladies
> takes 7 hours to make instant mashed potatoes
> will give you advice on social skills despite rarely interacting with real life people

You may not like it, but this is peak life goals
 
“Women will try to program… they, they find a man, and they will try and build him into the perfect man that they want, and they do it by using their emotions and their pussy, and it works because men are fuckin’ stupid assholes sometimes (drinks from bottle) and you can’t let women dictate your dating life, because if you do that, you’re going to be a miserable son of a bitch.” - King Cobra, dating coach
 
Goodwill trains retards into completing simple tasks. Why doesn’t Clint drop Cobe’s ass off over there? Smelling bad at a bins dump or sorting shit doesn’t matter so seems perfect for him.
In a sense I don't think he's retarded enough for Goodwill's kind of repetitive manual labor. He'd get bored and quit.
 
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Reactions: Ran-chan
Oh my god how many times do we have to go over why Josh can't work a job? I swear this has to be like the 20th time. He's a retard and he's lazy. He's also a drunk who reeks of shit and has brain damage. No one wants him to work for them.
Not to mention he hasn't worked in 8 years, that's not exactly an easy employment gap to fill. They'd assume he was in prison.

Guess he kind of is if you think about it.
 
What happens if you agree with her? Like if you slap the picture out of her hand and act like she offered you a cat turd on toast?
I imagine something along the lines of the kuchisake onna yokai, a "malevolent, malicious spirit of a woman" that is disfigured and asks potential victims if they think she's pretty.
kuchisake-onna.jpg
Here's a flow chart:

Kuchisake-onna_conversation_diagram.jpg

Apparently the winning move is to say "Average" but I could see NAL not liking that answer either. So I suppose I'm saying she's less reasonable, harder to deal with and more dangerous than a mythical, malevolent Japanese spirit. Makes ya thunk about that machete she wanted.
 
Oh my god how many times do we have to go over why Josh can't work a job? I swear this has to be like the 20th time. He's a retard and he's lazy. He's also a drunk who reeks of shit and has brain damage. No one wants him to work for them.
I don't believe he could even sort glass for the ARC at this point
1717459254333.jpeg
 
I imagine something along the lines of the kuchisake onna yokai, a "malevolent, malicious spirit of a woman" that is disfigured and asks potential victims if they think she's pretty.
View attachment 6051831
Here's a flow chart:

View attachment 6051806

Apparently the winning move is to say "Average" but I could see NAL not liking that answer either. So I suppose I'm saying she's less reasonable, harder to deal with and more dangerous than a mythical, malevolent Japanese spirit. Makes ya thunk about that machete she wanted.
I always think of her as an ushi-oni.
They're youkai that beat the shit out of anyone that go near their bodies of water (beach, lake, etc).
 
> has all the tacticool soap to steal all the ladies
> takes 7 hours to make instant mashed potatoes
> will give you advice on social skills despite rarely interacting with real life people

You may not like it, but this is peak life goals
- Has his own place RENT free, he’s the king of his castle and you’re all the dirty rascals paying off tuition debt

- Groceries are FREE, can anyone say Tacos every single day? Uhm YUMMMM?

- Internet and energy is FREE bby, run that air conditioner all night long who gives a fuck this is Cobra Country

- No debit card because where he’s going they only accept Clintercard, a premium black (and green) card with unlimited overdrafts

- Who needs a car when you have your own taxi service at your beck and call? Call 1-800-Nipples for your transport needs

- People throw money at you for no reason at all. Free phones and plane tickets to whatever destination your little heart desires. This is called the mile high club…and i’m not talking about the weed.

- Exit your luxury double wide and immerse yourself in the beautiful back country of Wyoming. Drink that crisp air in, gentlemen. That’s pine tar and success you’re tasting.

- Ladies, you’ll stick around for the smell of Tactical Soap (#7 Bond) but you’ll stay for the sex. Oh yeah, you’ll never want for another again after you have this half-chinese retard man wheezing in your ear for 5 minutes at a time. 5 minutes of pure bliss. He’ll lick your hairy stump clean, you’ll wish you were more dirty in the end.

This is BUT A TASTE of what you’ll experience at Casa De Boglim. You’ll pay for the whole seat…but you’ll only use the edge.

*Casa De Boglim is not responsible for any bed bugs you get from said seat.
 
Ya know what? I just realized that cobies literally has a girlfriend and that still isn’t enough for him to let go of gender rants. If anything having a gf has cranked them up to 11. I guess we just assumed his fixation was due to him being an incel but apparently not. Or, probably more accurately, he’s still fed the same content due to the algorithm and just can’t help himself
 
Adding to the job loop, even jobs a lot of mentally handicapped people do I don't think he has the drive to do, it may be menial labor but they take that shit seriously and actually do it at a decent level, which Josh wouldn't do. If you've ever worked a warehouse job you know that there's no better palette than a tard palette.
 
I always think of her as an ushi-oni.
They're youkai that beat the shit out of anyone that go near their bodies of water (beach, lake, etc).
That seems pretty accurate. Cobes actually reminds me of a kappa, but reading more seems like NAL behavior
“They are often accused of assaulting humans in water and removing a mythical organ called the shirikodama from their victim's anus”
IMG_4667.jpeg
 
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