Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

[FinnSven]

It's weird because I saw an episode of Never Mind the Buzzcocks where he hosted and while he was no Mark Lamarr he was decently funny and played off of everyone pretty well. It's like watching James from another dimension.
I had a similar experience with Kathy Griffith, who despite being extremely unfunny in almost every aspect, was actually a really good guest on Whose Line Is It Anyway?
I dunno, I guess it's a lot easier to be funny when you're forced to play off of other people.

Perhaps it is more that he is one of those people who can be funny off the cuff, so people assume he is funny in general.

I do suspect he was playing himself in Gavin and Stacey.
A fat obnoxious child-man seemed like a natural role for him.

Which could actually be a viable role for Patrick should another attempt at an American version of Gavin and Stacey be made.

 

[Procrastinhater]

There are two wolves within Patrick tonight, Gun Sperg Pat and Conspiracy Pat. Naturally he is feeding them both.
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Pats a fucking retard thats gonna end up with the Secret Service at his door.
You could make a 125 yard shot with an AR even standing up, but even prone with a bipod having groups spread over an inch or two is common. They don't all go through the same hole. It hit his fucking ear, less than an inch from starting a Civil War, Pat thinks he's Annie Oakley putting rounds through the same hole. An inch is nothing. Its pure luck or providence Trump wasn't killed, and Patty Pigtits here claiming it was a set up.
No one is gonna risk a shot like that for a false flag.
"Hurr just shoot my ear it'll look great on the campaign posters"
(That photo is iconic btw, reminds me of the Marines raising the flag at Iwo Jima)
Fuck off.

Please keep talking about how you could make that shot Pat you retard.
The RNC is next week. Pats getting a visit lol.

 

[S.C.U.D.]

Pat, you are digging yourself a hole...
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https://ghostarchive.org/archive/KnMAT

I woke up this morning still pissed off about this. "If I had tried to assassinate the President, I'm such a badass, legit tough guy that I would not have missed, stalker child." Who the fuck does he think he's fooling? He's too out of shape to even get on that roof in the first place, then he'd find out his finger is too fat to fit in the trigger guard. Then he'd realize he used his last bullet in the spring's pepperoni harvest.

 

[Immortal Technique Vol.2]

There could be a more sinister reason he likes going to the gun range. The paper targets are his preferred taste. I wouldn't be surprised if he referred to them as "those Bernell targets."

 

[AutoClownMaker]

If he doesn't, it's because he already has a file and it contains something to the extent of "Self-important retard. Noisy, but harmless. Extremely fat and I would not have sex with him."

He's claimed he's known to the FBI and would have a file on him due to the Patti LaBelle (and whatever other bomb threats happened with his name attached)

He'll definitely squeal about it online if someone does pay him a visit. We can count on that much.

Rather shocked there has not been a pest account dedicated to taking Posts by Pat and retweeting 'em at the SS/FBI demanding the menace to society and sobriety should enjoy prison.

He'll squeal if a pest pretends to be SS and asks him to come and see Special Agent Prongay downtown for a chat and how he had his non sober time wasted going for a fake meeting trying to have him killed. Same if a threat is made in Pat's name and he gets a knock.

The reaction to an actual SS visit for what he's posting will be a chest thumpting vaguepost.

 

[Something Awful]

Yes, Biden's dog is on to the conspiracy. That has got to be a plot point in multiple 90s comedies...



Hank must be new.



Fair point. Now, if the t-shirt said "Gay virgin Trump must die", then we'd know something's up.

Most people have a 6th sense of impending danger. When to duck, when to run, when to shut the fuck up.
Apparently this evolutionary trait was not passed on to Jennifer.

In fact, Rick takes pride in pretending to suppress this most natural of instincts.



(The quote is from a Doctor Who episode. Incidentally, it's surprising Rick doesn't talk about it more, it should really be his shit now that they've made the Doctor a... homosexual black person... from outer space (well, at least the actor is gay, they haven't shown anal penetration on screen yet))

 

[TURBONIGGERKIKE]

Any updates on the airbnb

 

[Dr. Matthew C. Harris]

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Yes, Biden's dog is on to the conspiracy. That has got to be a plot point in multiple 90s comedies...

Biden's dog searched the soul of the SS agents, and found out that they were no good Trump supporters lol. You can't make that shit up. Piggy is 100% schizo now, there's no way he's right in the head right now. I mean, he's never been but he must be extra currently, with all that's happened, and is happening.

 

[Friedchickenfan]

I woke up this morning still pissed off about this. "If I had tried to assassinate the President, I'm such a badass, legit tough guy that I would not have missed, stalker child." Who the fuck does he think he's fooling? He's too out of shape to even get on that roof in the first place, then he'd find out his finger is too fat to fit in the trigger guard. Then he'd realize he used his last bullet in the spring's pepperoni harvest.

Fat Pat couldn’t even assassinate his unborn child, the only thing he kills is parental responsibility. And food.

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

Fat Pat couldn’t even assassinate his unborn child, the only thing he kills is parental responsibility. And food.

And those poor African American boys he lures into his basement.

 

[Kela de Thaym]

Come on, Pat. If you’re so sure you wouldn’t have missed, then prove it to us next week (in Minecraft) when the RNC is in Milwaukee. This is your chance to surpass Rekeita and Bossmanjack for Lolcow of the Year!

 

[FinnSven]

And those poor African American boys he lures into his basement.

Is it exclusively boys?

I thought he wouldn’t discriminate by sex for niggeroni meat?

 

[The Taco Santo!]

He'd use it as his excuse for not going to one of the protests that'll happen.

Pat claims to be or have been a competitive marksman. Of course a lie, but his nonsense about this proves it conclusively. Anyone who has tried a distance shot at a moving target knows so many things can happen to spoil the shot. Primarily, the target moves in an unexpected direction as the shot is fired. Trump zigged instead of zagged and lost the tip of his ear instead of his life. It's like a tenth of a second, maybe a bit more, at that range for the bullet to travel from muzzle to target. Plenty of time for Trump's head to shift a few inches to the left or right.

That's why you go for center-mass and put two in his chest, not a headshot. Life isn't JFK Reloaded, head shots are tough.

 

[Cactuar King]

Is it exclusively boys?

I thought he wouldn’t discriminate by sex for niggeroni meat?

I mean...what do you think his signature cocktail weenies really were?

 

[Anonymus Fluhre]

We've all seen how well Patrick shoots. He can't hit worth shit at 30 yards. What hope would he have hitting anything at that distance? Also, someone with $20 Temu attachments shouldn't be talking about scopes and shit. I can only hope he gets a visit from SS because they aren't going to be as nice as his police officers are. You step out of your home to confront them Patrick and you'll be getting your LotY award you desperately want this year. We'll even figure out a way to put it on your grave. I vote for it being his headstone. "Here lies FFWBT's, he won his LotY award when all hope was gone"

 

[Maude Snew]

He didn't say he was going on a fucking diet, man.

Most people have a 6th sense of impending danger. When to duck, when to run, when to shut the fuck up.
Apparently this evolutionary trait was not passed on to Jennifer.

He's too fat to do any of those, especially shut up. You know how some people whistle when they breathe, when Rick breathes out it just goes "no, child" all by itself, nothing he can do about that except lose a lot of weight.

There are two wolves within Patrick tonight

And enough cheap beer and ground up black youth to feed half the continent of Africa.

Pat claims to be or have been a competitive marksman.

"If I had tried to assassinate the President, I'm such a badass, legit tough guy that I would not have missed, stalker child."

He can't hit worth shit at 30 yards.

Word on the street is he can't hit the toilet when trying to piss standing up, must be that faucet shaped ultra short barrel he's working with. Or maybe he's just too fat to aim properly.

 

[The Taco Santo!]

I'm sure your assassination attempt will go much better, Pat.

 

[S.C.U.D.]

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We know, Pat. That's why you have a 3250-page thread on the Kiwi Farms.

 

[Judge Holden]

Area pig declares himself entirely sane after several years of threatening his toilet with prison

Also upon reflecting on the different possibilities I laid out when pondering how fatty would handle the shooting....

• its a false flag that orangeman faked to muh-reichstag-fire the election
• it is of zero consequence because trump bad and muh january 6th
• its bad only because trump needs to be put to death after a show trial
• it will all be forgotten by next week and biden will still win effortlessly

....it seems that *all* these options were infact correct as he has gone from "ITS FAKE" to "ITS ONLY BAD BECAUSE HE NEEDS TO ENJOYPRISON" to "ORANGE MAN BAD SO IT DOESNT MATTER" and now he is wheeling to "DOESNT MATTER BIDEN IS STILL WINNING CHILD" as per his xeets today

EDIT: also just checked threads and he is just straight up oinking "IF I WAS THE SHOOTER I WOULDA TOTALLY SUCCEEDED IN KILLING HIM 100 TIMES OUTTA 100"


I wasnt going to give much thought to the suggestions he might get snitched to the SS and receive a visit from them but if he keeps up like this I would not exactly be shocked

 

[grapeshark77]

Some bonus Pat posts from the heat of the moment, even managing to piss off his followers in the last two.



Shooters usually aren't logical thinking people, I know it's a shock. Also his "bullets and ballots" posts from a while back are making the rounds, it's amazing how much violent rhetoric he's put up over the years.