Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Doctor of Autism]

I wonder how this was realized?

I like to imagine Tammy unloading him out of the car, pushing the chair to the top of the incline, then turning around to grab groceries. The wheelchair starts rolling as a bawling Jack struggles to stop the thing with his deadened limbs, and he wrecks.

He wasn't even talking about his wheelchair status, he was making fun of the former secret service director talking about how slopes are dangerous, but I guess Jack unintentionally owned himself.

 

[Quixotic Man]

Called it. Jack lidurally got Mommywife to build him a SECOND kitchen so that he can host his world-renowed Combining with Jack show! (A show where a stroked out fatty combines fud in a bowl because fud = gud!)

Imagine being this whipped to enable your useless husband to this extent!

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It a horrible kitchen set too. He has a nice wooden backdrop with pans he could use, but its off to the side. The main thing that will be in shot is the fucking microwave, which would be fine if it was just a home kitchen, but its a second studio set!

Don't get me wrong, putting a microwave front and center is perfect for Jack, but compare that to the backgrounds of other popular Youtube cooking channels. They all include a neutral backdrop with cooking equipment visible. He also put his stove in a place where he can't get a nice reverse shot of Tammy stirring cheese in to a fine slop. Jack is amazing for not only his lack of attention to detail, but being unable to see the bigger picture.

 

[Uber driver reviewer]

Same with all that sheite he has in his backyard & probably inside his house. Those weird Knife Sets that also make no sense whatsoever. I can pick you out a few Cooks that are in the apprenticeship that would rip him a new open one (yeah I know he's not really agile anymore, but you know what I mean) with a set of very basic Victorinox knives. Fucking fat fuck with his inflated Ego.

Also I was expecting the Kitchen to be a bit more ... exciting to be honest.

I have been slowly and carefully assembling a set of Japanese made Shun knives , and mastering both their use and maintenance just to spite Jack. I know you can sperg and autist about Japanese knives that are better for the money, or just better. But I’m making these work very well, and it’s easy to assemble a full set without turning into a spergy autist myself (easy for me to fall into).


Fuck Jack he’s an asshole.

 

[Marc]

If we take Jack at his word and believe he's actually lost weight (major X), there's no way he's lost anything but muscle.

Probably the muscles which controlled his bladder, bowels, and sweat, at that.

 

[RL Steinbeck]

Such a retarded idea. I get it for large channels. I get it for folk that have millions of subs and get huge views. For a guy that can barely break 10K views on videos an over a month old this is not the way to go. Just use your regular kitchen to cook in. You don't need this extra space / setup. But it's all to feed his massive ego.

Alternative theory: it was Tammy's idea because she's sick of tripping over the tripod and lighting stands he was too lazy to put away, and having to make lunch in a single square foot of counter space because the rest of it is being monopolized by multiple abandoned trays of stale melted cheese.

new video from rob & patti

maybe i'm just getting old or something but i genuinely, unironically enjoy these wholesome videos. the part where rob angrily berated the ice cream guy for not having donuts was a little jarring, as was the followup 5-minute rant to the camera about it, but oh well.

That place looks wonderful. Really, that courtyard looks so secluded and serene. I'd gain 10lbs if I lived near there.

Also, interesting Beauty Parlor cameo, lol. Don't be shy, Michelle. What did you and Patty talk about?

 

[EatBeforeYouEat]

Went by Jack's facebook page today. He had a multiple posts suggesting that Biden is dead. In true mushbrain fashion, he never expands on anything and keeps it vague by saying stuff like the text, audio and videos from the media are all fake. If any asks for some substance to backup his claims he says some infuriatingly dumb shit like "Dude, open your eyes. Stop believing everything you are told".

 

[Space Police]

"Dude, open your eyes. Stop believing everything you are told".

A sage piece of advice for when you talk to Fatty.

 

[Uber driver reviewer]

jack ate okra and isn’t experienced enough to know when he is burning cheese.


Also, Junior is a wigger. Likely a gay wigger. Like his dad. Gay for meat marines.


Stroke or heart attack in next 17 days mark my words.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Also I was expecting the Kitchen to be a bit more ... exciting to be honest.

I was expecting something more like a kitchen set instead of just a kitchen.

Don't get me wrong, putting a microwave front and center is perfect for Jack, but compare that to the backgrounds of other popular Youtube cooking channels. They all include a neutral backdrop with cooking equipment visible. He also put his stove in a place where he can't get a nice reverse shot of Tammy stirring cheese in to a fine slop. Jack is amazing for not only his lack of attention to detail, but being unable to see the bigger picture.

The difference is those guys can actually cook and admit it when they fuck up.

It's actually quite often with Babish. He'll do something, realize is wasn't right then do it again. The best was when he tried to make the Ube roll dessert from Stephen Universe and it took him like a dozen attempts to get it to look like it did in the cartoon.

 

[ZipDisk]

Studio kitchen is notjack. You'd think he'd lean into the orange/red wood of the old kitchen, but no, that would make sense. He went with that cold white, shitty blue curtain assthetic we've been stuck with since they vacated "the castle".

Weisman fucked up, his previous kitchen looked like something in a home, the marble bullshit doesn't fly. He fucked up. Dude thrives off "fast food but better" and goes fucking tomb raider with his kitchen. Like I get it. He wants authenticity when he's a fucking toober.

Back 2 Jack. Your replacement son is a faggot jack. Weep.

 

[Crex Crex]

Probably the muscles which controlled his bladder, bowels, and sweat, at that.

Forgot the arm.

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

Yeah, that is strange. Jack undoubtedly sees his channel(s) as his greatest contribution/achievement in life. It’s what he’s most proud of. Look at how he beamed on WTIC when he said ”it’s watched in 95 countries,” and refused to sell it out.

He managed to fuck everything up and now does manual labor at a warehouse. Even Jack knows Jr. is worthless.

 

[Tiresome]

Jack's treats his namesake spawn just like his cooking. Even though he did everything possible wrong and ended up with an obvious and complete failure, he's still proud as hell of it.

 

[AltisticRight]

Jack's treats his namesake spawn just like his cooking. Even though he did everything possible wrong and ended up with an obvious and complete failure, he's still proud as hell of it.

His spawn is even horribly undercooked too, it can do better with a couple more weeks inside of Tammy.

 

[VenomPlug]

Look who's fucking talking

 

[Marc]

Forgot the arm.

That arm never had muscle. It has more in common with a jelly roll. I do agree that Jack could easily lose a few pounds forgetting the arm when he leaves a restaurant; giving them a negative review when they refuse to return the arm or the twenty five cent tip he left on the table with it.

 

[Kosher Salt]

i'd say it's one of the cooler middle names to give to a guy named Jack

I mean, I'd put it pretty low on the list. Somewhere long after Jack Skellington Scalfani.

If any asks for some substance to backup his claims he says some infuriatingly dumb shit like "Dude, open your eyes. Stop believing everything you are told".

Absence of evidence vs. evidence of absence. Something that will be entirely lost an a living abscess like Jack.

Look who's fucking talking

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The fuck does he think all of those people are going? Sitting on your fat ass in your mommywife's home watching Blues Clues doesn't create traffic.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Jack's treats his namesake spawn just like his cooking. Even though he did everything possible wrong and ended up with an obvious and complete failure, he's still proud as hell of it.

What else has Fatty to be proud of?

He's accomplished nothing of note except being a laughingstock on the internet. He's a living meme at this point.

Look who's fucking talking

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WAAAAAH! I'm being slightly inconvenienced and it's everybody's fault but my own. WAH!

It's traffic. It happens. Grow the fuck up.

 

[Uber driver reviewer]

Look who's fucking talking

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Jack isn’t driving.

Why isn’t Tammy at work?

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

Why isn’t Tammy at work?

Probably on vacation.