Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

[bortherman]

If the fat faggots, bitch tits actually did secure $100,000 contract for three shitty books by miraculous intervention of Satan Himself and now refuses anything less no matter what then I humbly request pallbearers from this thread to carry me to my grave; I have died of laughter.

Even great authors have had to accept down contracts when in a doldrums. If he really is out there insisting nobody can have Stiny Stim without also signing up for additional books he is phenomenally deluded.

Pat's hubris will prevent him from getting Tiny Tim published. What you say is likely very accurate along with the following that will make it harder for a deal to be struck:

Currently he has separate rights for his e-book and audibook sales, AR and TOR do not earn anything from those sales, nor do they count towards his quota to fill for royalties. After a great cope n seethe from funsters mocking his sales he has stated that 'e' titles outsell 10x more than physical copies. (publishers take note)

If pat thinks he can get an advance + royalties + separate e-book/audiobook sales for anything again after the last steaming dump he took (In The Black) then he is delusional. He now gets to write on Spec where is agent will send over his book with a list of many others to publishing houses for them to bid on. He may, if lucky, get a couple of grand if someone wants to take a punt on the premise, they need some books to fill shelves and this is "ready to go". Would pat accept a flat $2k for his Tiny Tim masterpiece he has spent several years writing?

The biggest issue is his work ethic/quality. There are several tweets years after In The Black was released where he tags in TOR when someone asks about the sequel. Fatty "has half written it" and is waiting for someone (TOR) to pay him to finish it. (TOR have never replied).
Or shopping his bloated out bounty hunter story, he was actively shopping it around on the premise that if you pay him he will lengthen it into a novel. gee thanks.

From piecing together various tweets (though you have to take fatty on his word), TOR were lumbered with his Hitchhikers Fanfic as their first book.
This is the first book that Fatty had written, done over 40 rewrites, was rejected 100's of times. AR flat out said they didn't want it (hence him writing the children of a dead earth trilogy). It is suspected that when he signed for TOR, it was for an advance for 3 books. Unlike AR where he had to submit the first book to get the deal. This was fattys opportunity to get his fanfic published and he dropped that stinker on them. After he gave them a sequel they told him to fuck off and try something new. Big brained patrick throught if he started another trilogy, they would resign him so he can complete it.
No effort in starting/finishing the 3rd book of his fanfic trilogy (breach series).

Obviously his battle with the Pests and his extreme TDS wouldn't have helped, but unless his first book sold gangbusters, his relationship with TOR was over after pulling that shit and they just let him write out the 2nd and third of his contract with no renewal.

There are better breakdowns on the other forum regarding the sales etc. the TLDR of it is:
Given the best possible numbers with a massive overestimation in his favor, he has earned less than $200k in his 14 year writer career.
That figure may even exclude tax/agent fees/expenses etc.

 

[Anonymus Fluhre]

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"Women have always been great leaders and warriors, poets and scientists, nurturers and protectors. They can do it all. Shame on men for suppressing them for so long.

Except conservative women. All those catty cunts do is compete over dick."

- Feminist philosopher Patrick Tomlinson, 2024

Patrick doesn't know Hillary's history I see. Then again, he doesn't know many things.

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Pat thinks you can't speak Spanish or navigate your way around Mexico unless you're Mexican.
It's an especially stupid take when you consider he's a supposed author who should be familiar with concepts like translation or cultural research.

Too bad they just exploited the cartel and had them help.

But Zambada didn’t know US investigators had exploited a rift in the Sinaloa cartel and Guzman Lopez was helping with Zambada’s capture, the official said.

They also didn't have the help of Mexico authorities. They don't seem to pleased about this.
As usual, Patrick is an idiot who just gets his information second hand.

 

[FinnSven]

pat sees women (like his wife and unborn child he threatened to murder) as easy targets, in reality a granny with a bad hip could probably kick his ass.

Liz Fong Jones could kick his arse.

 

[Anonymus Fluhre]

Liz Fong Jones could kick his arse.

His boyfriend who likes to slither around on the ground could kick his ass and he thinks he's a snake so wouldn't even use his legs.

 

[Something Awful]

This is so stupid that I have become dumber after reading it.

Agreed. The chain of logic is such that I don't even know where to start commenting on this one. He must be drinking early today if he thought that was a persuasive or coherent tweet worth posting.

Before I lose too many brain cells from thinking about it, the key issues are:

1) "DEI hire" (pejorative), as popularly understood, does not mean simply professionals from different cultural backgrounds or with knowledge of different languages, especially if that is a skill relevant to their job! It means people preferentialy hired for those attributes even though they have no relevancy to the job.

2) What is he saying about Mexico and Mexicans if you NEED to have someone first emigrate to the U.S. and then go back to Mexico to capture a Mexican drug lord, instead of simply collaborating with local Mexican law enforcement?

 

[Procrastinhater]

There is a new stalker in town and he is really annoying Pat. Pat reveals that his new Tiny Tim in Space novella is not going to be published this year.
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I think that he has had this book finished for over a year now, he mentioned that the agent loves it on March 8 this year and was talking of rewrites in January 2023.
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Pat appears to have decided to write the book by early December 2021.
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So he has already been writing and trying to sell his book for more than two and a half years and it now won't be published until (I would assume Christmas period) 2025 at the very earliest.


This is why your career is already over, fatso. Enjoy poverty.

If that borderline plagiarist dogshit is going to be published at all it'll be an ebook or self published.
Man of Pigs publishers have abandoned him because he's fucking PR poison, he's always acting like an asshole on Xitter, starting fights and tagging in all kinds of companies and people, he's starting to get banned from all the conventions he used to go to because of his faggot histrionics and fake bomb threats and he makes new Patposters wherever he goes.
His books don't even sell enough to make them worth a publishers investment.
Pat had a real chance, something many people would kill for, and he squandered it by being lazy and belligerent and acting like a low iQ homosexual to everyone online he should have been making connections and friends with.
His "career" is cleaning logs at his lesbian wifes Air BnB.
He's not a writer.
He used to be, but he wasted his chance.

 

[Thé au lait]

Fuck yeah! Rick goes to Hollywood!

"SFWA member goes to Hollywood" is a concerning headline

It's an especially stupid take when you consider he's a supposed author who should be familiar with concepts like translation or cultural research

 

[Procrastinhater]

I think everyone can agree that no woman is seething as hard as Jill is.

With the exception of Nikkis Mom whenever she thinks about the 80K Fatrick cost her paying his debts.

His boyfriend who likes to slither around on the ground could kick his ass and he thinks he's a snake so wouldn't even use his legs.

Or his arms.
It'd be like the Black Knight on Monty Python, he'd have to slither about trying to headbutt Pat in the knees and he'd still probably win because Pats a soy filled bitch.

 

[NIGGO KILLA]

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Another one of Rick's poorly-observed musings. No wonder he kept bombing at standup, whatever he says is always the opposite of astute.

I would think if women are choosing cats over men, or men are choosing porn over women, that's simply a problem, not a narrowly-defined "you problem" where "you" means the cartoonish evil chuds that reside in Rick's head.

Though, if a woman chooses to make you sign away your parental rights and you threaten to kill her and your unborn child, that's very specifically a Rick problem.

Childless Cat Ladies is just the term Incel for the other sex

 

[Anonymus Fluhre]

With the exception of Nikkis Mom whenever she thinks about the 80K Fatrick cost her paying his debts.

Or his arms.
It'd be like the Black Knight on Monty Python, he'd have to slither about trying to headbutt Pat in the knees and he'd still probably win because Pats a soy filled bitch.

Patrick is so stupid, he'd actually think the guy's a snake.

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

Given the best possible numbers with a massive overestimation in his favor, he has earned less than $200k in his 14 year writer career.

The amazing thing is that by all possible metrics, before you learn the details, fats is a successful writer. Why? The vast number of novels/books written never get even self-published. Of the ones that get published, most sell few copies, even with promotion. Having multiple sequels and ranking "not horrible" on the kindle store (there are people lower than him, to be fair) means he's way further than most wanna-be redditors, for example.

And he did some relatively intelligent tricks (meaning his agent isn't/wasn't a complete fuckup) and got a number of books published. And keeping e-book rights? That shit was a smart move by someone, especially in the era of Kindle).

And all this has been pissed away in the wind by a fat faggot with tits of a bitch.

Also look how his entire life is built around this doggam author blurb ahahahahahaha:

Patrick S. Tomlinson is a man of many hats. In addition to writing Sci-Fi novels (Gate Crashers) and shorts, he prowls theaters, clubs, and bars throughout the midwest performing as a stand-up comedian. Between gigs, cons, and rewrites, he works as a pundit and frequent political contributor, with columns appearing in publications such as The Hill and The New York Times. In the little downtime remaining, Patrick enjoys hobbies such as motorcycling, model-building, and shooting. He lives in Milwaukee with his wife, two cats, a bearded dragon, and a 2008 Bullitt Edition Mustang named Susan.

(side note, this comes ahead of him in a amazon search for "tomlinson" lol)


EDIT: Fuck you I need to rewrite this biography, feel free to step in:

Patrick S. Tomlinson is a man of many chins. In addition to writing bad Sci-Fi novels (Gate Crashers) and pissing his shorts, he prowls theaters, clubs, and bars throughout the midwest, until they notice him and call the police. He calls it "performing as a stand-up comedian" but the only part of that he was able to do was "stand up". Between gigs, cons, and extremely frequent rewrites, he works as a pundit and frequent political contributor, with nearly seventy billion Xitter posts into the void. In the little downtime remaining, Patrick pretends to enjoy hobbies such as motorcycling, model-building, and shooting. He lives in Milwaukee with his wife, two cats, a flattened bearded dragon, and a 2008 Bullitt Edition Mustang named Susan, whom he has loved longer and harder than any of his wives. He is also a fat faggot with bitch tits and has the longest Kiwifarms thread of any published author.

 

[Elbe]

 

[RiceofSkywalker]

1) "DEI hire" (pejorative), as popularly understood, does not mean simply professionals from different cultural backgrounds or with knowledge of different languages, especially if that is a skill relevant to their job! It means people preferentialy hired for those attributes even though they have no relevancy to the job.

Pat's just mindlessly following the recent Dem trend of "taking back DEI" (aka language hijacking and subversion, a favorite pastime of theirs - see "gender affirming care" = genital mutilation or "reproductive healthcare" = abortions, but I digress).

He sees his team try to spin around DEI in Harris' favor, he acquires a new objective: "Man of Pig must go viral. Man of Pig must crack topical jokes and witticisms". Doesn't matter how stupid the attempts. Same thing with the Vance couch jokes. He'll get that call to become a pundit any day now, I tell ya.

 

[FinnSven]

With the exception of Nikkis Mom whenever she thinks about the 80K Fatrick cost her paying his debts.

Or his arms.
It'd be like the Black Knight on Monty Python, he'd have to slither about trying to headbutt Pat in the knees and he'd still probably win because Pats a soy filled bitch.

Fatrick would start to make a “tactical move to gain space” but would lumber over the writhing hissing fool, only to stumble and break his ankle.

It would be a bizarrely pathetic fight, but Fatrick would certainly be the loser.

 

[Judge Holden]

Alrighty, seeing how far I can stretch the creepy ass pig-leer AI video and im delving further into unexplored regions of horror

pfw he feels the fishhooks I filigreed round muh dick

EDIT:

pfw the roofies kick in on his pet lizard

 

[Maude Snew]

Fatrick would start to make a “tactical move to gain space” but would lumber over the writhing hissing fool, only to stumble and break his ankle.

It would be a bizarrely pathetic fight, but Fatrick would certainly be the loser.

You can say a lot about Rick but at least he hasn't had his dick cut off. Mostly because he can't find it, and even if he could it wouldn't really make a difference, it is what it is. Tiny and misshapen.

 

[Judge Holden]

Seems the maid is getting a lil testy about the fact his professional life is about as rich and fulfilling as his parental life

 

[The Taco Santo!]

He really does think that Triumph makes him more outlaw than Harley riders. I wonder what piece of bad entertainment he lifted that from to become part of his American Badass persona?

 

[AnOminous]

Having multiple sequels and ranking "not horrible" on the kindle store (there are people lower than him, to be fair) means he's way further than most wanna-be redditors, for example.

I'm not impressed since he constantly threatened and harassed people who made negative reviews. Claiming anyone who didn't like his shitty books was defaming him was even part of the basis for his lolsuit.

And he did some relatively intelligent tricks (meaning his agent isn't/wasn't a complete fuckup) and got a number of books published. And keeping e-book rights? That shit was a smart move by someone, especially in the era of Kindle).

One of his agents was Russell Galen, also known for being Phil Dick's literary agent.

 

[Associate Rick]

Alrighty, seeing how far I can stretch the creepy ass pig-leer AI video and im delving further into unexplored regions of horror

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pfw he feels the fishhooks I filigreed round muh dick

EDIT:
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pfw the roofies kick in on his pet lizard

That's absolutely horrifying, like something out of The Thing