- Joined
- Jan 24, 2020
This was a slow Rick weekend (apparently he was busy going back to E. Coli Beach to watch the same air show twice), so I decided to take a look at Patrick's first few of years on Twitter.
Reading whole years of Rick's Twitter activity would be daunting today, but in the early years from 2012 to 2014 Patrick didn't tweet that much and was generally ignored by everyone.

As you can see, Patrick celebrated only 300 likes almost two years after registering on Twitter in September 2012.
Did I say ignored by everyone? Not entirely true. On September 23, 2013, Patrick, for the first time, received public attention for a tweet. His comment "Hard to win a game when you can't score TD's on FOUR CONSECUTIVE TURNOVERS! #postgameblitz" was displayed by Fox6 News Milwaukee in a news ticker.
Patrick... likes it. Something horrible begins gestating in his mind.

But it would still be years until his ascension to Twitter superstardom as a 1.7 GPA political firebrand. What did he tweet about in the meantime?
Aside from generic sports takes like the above, Patrick sharpened his wit with short-form jokes that ranged from the topical and profound...

....to the charmingly bawdy.

A surprising amount of his jokes (?) dealt with the experience of walking into the women's restroom.



(This was before current year and should not be interpreted as transphobia in any way)

Early interaction with then-future president and Rick's nemesis Donald Trump.

The term is body dysmorphia, and you have it.

Patrick could not foresee that, many years later, threads dedicated to him on multiple forums would serve the same purpose for hundreds if not thousands of people.

"What other kinds of pork are there? Pig, check, Thai, check, what's next on the list? ...Afro-American?"

I don't know, Rick. I guess I would just pick the urinal nearest to me, but I'm not a big homo who cruises public bathrooms for guys to get closer to.

Patrick was always into things.

Perhaps the earliest interaction in the style of current-day Rick, though no childing yet. Hard to believe, but talking to people in this manner wasn't the norm for Patrick a decade ago. His aggression and zealotry grew proportionally to his girth.

The study to answer this question is still ongoing.

Wrong, child. Racism ends when the last of the Republicans and their cowardly sympathizers draws their last breath.

Foreshadowing.

Narrator: He stopped writing.

In the following decade, Rick would learn so much he would reach Doctor Manhattan-like levels of omniscience. Fans call him Doctor Manfattan.

Vintage Culinary Rick.

Rick's gay snake and the live mice he fed to it. Did he sit on this one as well?

Finally, Rick explains what being conservative means. He seems to be confusing it with empiricism.
That's it for now, maybe see you some other time for 2015–2016: the run-up to the Trump years, becoming a published novelist, and onset of TDS.
Reading whole years of Rick's Twitter activity would be daunting today, but in the early years from 2012 to 2014 Patrick didn't tweet that much and was generally ignored by everyone.

As you can see, Patrick celebrated only 300 likes almost two years after registering on Twitter in September 2012.
Did I say ignored by everyone? Not entirely true. On September 23, 2013, Patrick, for the first time, received public attention for a tweet. His comment "Hard to win a game when you can't score TD's on FOUR CONSECUTIVE TURNOVERS! #postgameblitz" was displayed by Fox6 News Milwaukee in a news ticker.
Patrick... likes it. Something horrible begins gestating in his mind.

But it would still be years until his ascension to Twitter superstardom as a 1.7 GPA political firebrand. What did he tweet about in the meantime?
Aside from generic sports takes like the above, Patrick sharpened his wit with short-form jokes that ranged from the topical and profound...

....to the charmingly bawdy.

A surprising amount of his jokes (?) dealt with the experience of walking into the women's restroom.



(This was before current year and should not be interpreted as transphobia in any way)

Early interaction with then-future president and Rick's nemesis Donald Trump.

The term is body dysmorphia, and you have it.

Patrick could not foresee that, many years later, threads dedicated to him on multiple forums would serve the same purpose for hundreds if not thousands of people.

"What other kinds of pork are there? Pig, check, Thai, check, what's next on the list? ...Afro-American?"

I don't know, Rick. I guess I would just pick the urinal nearest to me, but I'm not a big homo who cruises public bathrooms for guys to get closer to.

Patrick was always into things.

Perhaps the earliest interaction in the style of current-day Rick, though no childing yet. Hard to believe, but talking to people in this manner wasn't the norm for Patrick a decade ago. His aggression and zealotry grew proportionally to his girth.

The study to answer this question is still ongoing.

Wrong, child. Racism ends when the last of the Republicans and their cowardly sympathizers draws their last breath.

Foreshadowing.

Narrator: He stopped writing.

In the following decade, Rick would learn so much he would reach Doctor Manhattan-like levels of omniscience. Fans call him Doctor Manfattan.


Vintage Culinary Rick.


Rick's gay snake and the live mice he fed to it. Did he sit on this one as well?

Finally, Rick explains what being conservative means. He seems to be confusing it with empiricism.
That's it for now, maybe see you some other time for 2015–2016: the run-up to the Trump years, becoming a published novelist, and onset of TDS.
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