Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta - Polysubstance enthusiast, "Lawtuber" turned Dabbleverse streamer, swinger, "whitebread ass nigga", snuffs animals for fun, visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold who lost his license to practice law. Wife's bod worth $50. The normies even know.

[PhoBingas]

Honestly it’s hard to tell which of the two is more pathetic. Ralph waging holy war against Nick’s enemies to get pitybuckz from his fans, or Nick for having to fall back on Dick Masterson’s rogue’s gallery for interviews because he’s become totally unlikeable.

Better yet, whose core fan base is more pathetic? Ralph’s loser woman-hating wigger nation or Nick’s junkie schizo parasocial retards?

Ralph's paypigs had funnier names so I'll pick his as superior.
Rackets paypigs are just coomers and ran through wine aunts.

“Jesus Mon”?!?

Josh, the first Mexican rastafarian.

 

[Balldo's Gate]

Ashton and Andy are walking King Phil, also known as DSP, through Nick's Balldo review video right now. This is surreal.

https://kick.com/kinocasinogaming



DSP on Rekieta: "Once you put the clown makeup on, it doesn't come off. How can anyone treat him seriously as a lawyer, content creator? He's just going to be a joke from now on."

DSP on his longevity as a content creator:
"This is what I don't do," referring to the above video.

DSP is now reviewing the massage story:
"Wait, that's his wife? And he's laughing?"



DSP reviews shirtless Nick Rekieta almost licking Aaron:


"No. I would not be licking my friends."

"Is it worth it for this being your legacy?"

King Phil blames drugs.

 

[themanwhowalks]

20 pages of his signature getting made fun of.

The real problem is that no one is actually giving ANY advice, its like with his diet and workout routine. There's obviously a problem here and we need to tell him how to fix it. He really just needs more input from us clearly. We're all in this together guys, so here is my solution:

Seriously, what would Jos Mon do without us

 

[Taco Conspiracy]

I don't know if anyone brought this up yet but...

HAPPY ANAL AUGUST EVERYONE!!!!!!

Almost forgot.

 

[Blackhole]

Kek, Null is a Digimon.

Go, Jewmon! Digivolve into Nullamon!
- DIGIMON, DIGITAL MASTERS, DIGIMON ARE THE CHAMPIONS-

 

[Himedall All-seeing Waifu]

A few highlights from the Rekieta Binder:



Any idea who 'Amber' is? CPS worker?




This is a former fan who attended his Vegas event. The 'grandma' with dentures, if anyone remembers that tale.



The records clerk confirms that the case investigation needs to be closed to release footage.



The original estimate of cost.

ETA: clarification of a technical word

 

[Gorton Colu]

The real problem is that no one is actually giving ANY advice, its like with his diet and workout routine. There's obviously a problem here and we need to tell him how to fix it. He really just needs more input from us clearly. We're all in this together guys, so here is my solution:
View attachment 6281147


Seriously, what would Jos Mon do without us

My submission. Pls r8.

OC. Donut steel.

Rekieta tax. I bet Josh's regular paper signature is better than cokehead cokieta's.

 

[Mike Stoklasas Spock Ears]

Any idea who 'Amber' is? CPS worker?

Wouldn’t be surprised if she just misremembered April’s name lol.

 

[Fake News Anchor]

All yuh batty boiys trying tuh tell mi dat mi boiy Jozu Mon nuh spelling 'eem name right
got tuh 'ave yuh head check'd
mi kno dat 'eem spelling evuhting correct. Kno dat yuh hea!

 

[Balldo's Gate]

BREAKING NEWS: King Phil just solved Rekieta's Denny's joke: "I've known a lot of very stupid people in my life, so I usually can decipher what this gibberish is."

It's supposed to be about the Denny's menu being too hard to understand.

 

[AltisticRight]

insurance on the line for that

how many lines?

I don't know if anyone brought this up yet but...

HAPPY ANAL AUGUST EVERYONE!!!!!!

Almost forgot.

Today's also Jamaica's independence day.

 

[Clyde Cash's Left Teste]

View attachment 6279809
Null...buddy, what the hell is up with your signature?

Why are we having a fight over signatures?

 

[Nate Higgers]

The records clerk confirms that the case needs to be closed to release footage.

Fucking gay ass faggot ass legal court bureaucracy bullshit faggotry. Judges are faggots, lawyers are faggots, clerks are faggots, the whole legal system is one big gay faggot circlejerk bukkake niggerfaggot orgy.

“FUCK THE LAW NIGGA” - Ethan Ralph (and ThreeSixMafia too, I guess)

 

[Third World Aristocrat]

BREAKING NEWS: King Phil just solved Rekieta's Denny's joke: "I've known a lot of very stupid people in my life, so I usually can decipher what this gibberish is."

It's supposed to be about the Denny's menu being too hard to understand.

View attachment 6281306

Even with the magnanimous King’s Phil explanation. I still feel like a cop at Denny’s when trying to understand said joke.

 

[Fake News Anchor]

Even with the magnanimous King’s Phil explanation. I still feel like a cop at Denny’s when trying to understand said joke.

What's the difference between a cop at Denny's and a Kiwi Farmer?

Spoiler

To get to the other side.

 

[AnOminous]

The records clerk confirms that the case needs to be closed to release footage.

It doesn't say that in what you quote. It says the investigation needs to be closed, not the case in court.

 

[Ted Kaczynski]

View attachment 6279809
Null...buddy, what the hell is up with your signature?

He used his penis to sign it. Years of sounding has allowed him to hold a pilot G2 with his urethra.

 

[Bowl of Ramen]

BREAKING NEWS: King Phil just solved Rekieta's Denny's joke: "I've known a lot of very stupid people in my life, so I usually can decipher what this gibberish is."

It's supposed to be about the Denny's menu being too hard to understand.

View attachment 6281306

King Phil got some kill shots in tonight. Man, I can’t hate on Phil. What an institution.

 

[AnOminous]

Why are we having a fight over signatures?

Because people are gay and will fight about anything.

 

[Roboute Guilliman]

All yuh batty boiys trying tuh tell mi dat mi boiy Jozu Mon nuh spelling 'eem name right
got tuh 'ave yuh head check'd
mi kno dat 'eem spelling evuhting correct. Kno dat yuh hea!
​

I know this is supposed to be a Jamaican accent but I read it as 40k Orcish instead. I may need to take a break from GW's audio books.