Opinion HOW TO DEAL WITH A HUSBAND ADDICTED TO PORN

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HOW TO DEAL WITH A HUSBAND ADDICTED TO PORN​

Pornography is incredibly difficult to quit. It is a very real addiction that rewires the brain. If your husband is open to accountability software, by all means use it. We use covenant eyes. It works on all of our devices. But do not put your trust in software. No software works 100 percent of the time. There is always a way around it.

If your husband is open to Christian counseling, do it. But not marriage counseling, counseling for him. He will need help to learn how to overcome addiction, strategies for rewiring the neuropathways in the brain, and help to see the damage caused by this sin.

Whether or not he is open to the types of help I mentioned, there are three incredibly important things you MUST do:

1. Stop looking. Seriously, do not check up on your husband. Don’t look at his likes or browser history. Men find this very disrespectful. It’s not your job to catch him in sin or convict. Leave that work to the Holy Spirit. The Lord sees everything.

2. Pray for your husband. Pray for him continually. Every time you think of him pray.

3. Be a good wife; obedient to all the commands the Lord gives to wives. You must show him respect and submit to him.

It’s not easy to do these things but remember that your trust is in the Lord. You don’t have to trust your husband, but you must always show him respect and submit to him. Do not bring up the past.

These things are as much for him as they are for you. Knowing if he is doing what is wrong isn’t helping you be a good wife. It isn’t helping you to give to your husband cheerfully. It isn’t helping you to trust in the Lord.

I have walked this road and helped many other women walk it as well. The Lord will help you.

Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.

1 Peter 3:1,2

 

[Karen of Human Resources]

If the woman is simply getting offended about the man looking at porn every once in awhile thats on her

Lets flip this one for a moment.

If your wife was googling 18 year old college swim team athletes in speedos, could only get in the mood with that, how are you going to feel about that? Now let's escalate that to some caricature of a steroid hunk with ten inches doing some sort of olympian tier tantric yoga you can never do.

Bet that's going to have an impact on the old self esteem right? I'm not anti-porn by any stretch, but it does have potential to impact a partner. Especially a religious one, at which point I would ask why you thought dipping your dick in the kool aid was a good idea

Why are y'all like this? Why? And y'all call us degenerates.

The coven craveth new knowledge, and we compare notes on what we should reasonably expect.

 

[Ughubughughughughughghlug]

Are you saying that's a problem, or the solution?

Rape isn't a solution, it's a reason
And tonight everything seems so reasonable

 

[AllieKat]

Say that to Chris tysons ex wife i dare you.

For those who want to see how she looks like here is link to her insta

https://www.instagram.com/katiefarquhartyson/?hl=en

There's only two pictures of him in her entire timeline. This marriage is doomed.

 

[Pee Cola]

Two options:

1. Divorce him
2. Start putting out more, you frigid bitch

 

[Grundlejungle]

Maybe he cranks one out when his wife is on the rag. Ain't nothing wrong with that.

 

[OrionBalls]

Imagine applying this shit logic to any other type of addict. While it is very true that you cannot control his actions, you need counseling, too. Don't enable the fucking shit behavior, learn how to hold him accountable for his actions. That is, if you want to try and salvage the marriage.

 

[Heed Not]

You touch your cock, are satisfied and trick your brain into thinking you've done the hard work of gym, socialising, chasing and shagging.

Not that you shouldn't do all of those things, but no amount of lifting and hanging out at the bar is going to make the average man accumulating a harem or something. For a good many it won't change how often they're having sex at all. This idea that you'd be drowning in  real pussy if you just stopped touching yourself is an encouraging lie.

 

[Whoopsie Daisy]

Not that you shouldn't do all of those things, but no amount of lifting and hanging out at the bar is going to make the average man accumulating a harem or something. For a good many it won't change how often they're having sex at all. This idea that you'd be drowning in  real pussy if you just stopped touching yourself is an encouraging lie.

No, it's not. For one, the people who actually go out and lift is so minimal and the benefits so great, that it elevates them away from the trough of pigshit level dating prospects, allowing them to tap into a new market more flooded with available pussy than their previous social value level. That's a fact.

Secondly, going to the gym isn't just getting in shape. It's gaining energy and confidence, which unlocks more doors socially. It's setting a schedule; daily or a few times a week. It allows you to see new faces and new people when taking spinning or cross-fit classes. It's a hobby you can talk to people about and open new social doors with people, which in turn leads to more experiences and more opportunities to meet new people and more women. It changes your diet, through force, pushing people to drink more water, eat more healthily and be more focused on a new lifestlye. Attraction is everything. An out of shape man and an in shape man, all things equal academically, will find that the in-shape man gets the job, promotion or extra pay 9/10 over out of shape or unattractive people. Fact.

Compare that with wanking alone in a room to tranny porn. Let's play that out in a work-place scenarion.
Chad - "Hey, Bob, I finally managed to squat 240 last night, it was hard work but I'm glad I achieved it"
Bob - "nice one, Chad, are you heading to the gym tonight? Maybe we can hit the town afterwards?"
Chad - "sure"

Virgin - "Hey, Bob, I wanked off to some romanian tranny porn last night and came so hard that it hurts to pee"
Bob - "O...K. Hey, Chad, Are you off to the gym tonight?"

 

[Wendell Stamps DoL]

I'm not going to sperg out because I can't be arsed but there's a thing called kinaesthetic anchoring, whereby you use touch to put your mind into a certain state. Wanking does just that. You touch your cock, are satisfied and trick your brain into thinking you've done the hard work of gym, socialising, chasing and shagging.

That's a good point. Alright you've convinced me, in the interests of wire heading my way to the ultimate in autistic efficiency I am swearing off women and marrying my dick.

 

[grump]

Wanking isn't getting hot women. It's short-cutting the brain's most powerful driver; sex, by jerking it to women on TV. This isn't the titillating porn of the 70's or 80's or the new porn of the 90's where it was everywhere but not acted upon, this is 24/7 degeneracy beamed into people's subconscious.

Wanking is a lie but its a more honest lie than being a virtual incel monk in a marriage. Do I want to pretend to bang all the hot chicks I can imagine or do I want to pretend I am a virtual monk with extreme tunnel vision 24/7 for the rest of my life exclusively to some crinkly bloated 50 year old mess who couldn't keep up with me even if we wanted to. Also newsflash. Men have been wanking throughout history. Its not some new thing.

Tricking that switch into thinking porn will cover up for the excuse of not going to the gym and bettering yourself is why men turn into wrinkly incels.

What do you mean by 'bettering yourself'. The most successful men with the hottest wives still consume porn. True sexual fulfillment as we are naturally wired for where a man becomes a Genghis Khan like alpha taking any and all women he wants is basically impossible in today's society for any man. What remaining freedom you have left is admitting what you are and being unashamed of what you want.

Lets flip this one for a moment.

If your wife was googling 18 year old college swim team athletes in speedos, could only get in the mood with that, how are you going to feel about that? Now let's escalate that to some caricature of a steroid hunk with ten inches doing some sort of olympian tier tantric yoga you can never do.

Bet that's going to have an impact on the old self esteem right? I'm not anti-porn by any stretch, but it does have potential to impact a partner. Especially a religious one, at which point I would ask why you thought dipping your dick in the kool aid was a good idea

Almost no one really thinks their current partner is the hottest person in the world lets face reality. No amount of wishing or pretending will make it not so. You can either whine and moan and destroy a relationship over it or maybe just treat it like going to the bathroom. If they aren't actually cheating and keeping it out of sight instead of trying to shame you by unfolding pages of roided out hunks in front of your face, it doesn't really affect you in the least.

 

[Heed Not]

For one, the people who actually go out and lift is so minimal and the benefits so great, that it elevates them away from the trough of pigshit level dating prospects, allowing them to tap into a new market more flooded with available pussy than their previous social value level. That's a fact.

You're preaching to the choir about fitness being valuable for self improvement and general personal betterment, but after fairly recently having to listen to two  separate gymchad divorce sagas with obese unemployed wives that were sooo hot at first, you're missing the mark calling it a panacea.

 

[Would]

Threaten him you'll leave him and if he carries on, leave him.

A porn-addict husband is no better than a shopping-addict wife.

 

[Whoopsie Daisy]

Wanking is a lie but its a more honest lie than being a virtual incel monk in a marriage. Do I want to pretend to bang all the hot chicks I can imagine or do I want to pretend I am a virtual monk with extreme tunnel vision 24/7 for the rest of my life exclusively to some crinkly bloated 50 year old mess who couldn't keep up with me even if we wanted to. Also newsflash. Men have been wanking throughout history. Its not some new thing.

You sound degenerate. You don't have to choose between choking the chicken and living like a monk, there's a healthy middle-ground that billions of men have found throughout history.
Wanking isn't the topic at hand, porn addiction is.

Learn some self control.

What do you mean by 'bettering yourself'. The most successful men with the hottest wives still consume porn. True sexual fulfillment as we are naturally wired for where a man becomes a Genghis Khan like alpha taking any and all women he wants is basically impossible in today's society for any man. What remaining freedom you have left is admitting what you are and being unashamed of what you want.

So in your world, because you can't rape women and children all day (Which is what Khan did) the alternative is to be a succesful man with a hot wife who still watches porn? Do yourself a favour, touch grass and lift. Unless I'm the exception - I'm not, watching porn when I'm in a relationship with a woman I want to fuck the life out of 24/7, is the last thing on my mind. If you're in a relationship and still jerking it, either you don't find your partner attractive and are a coward for not leaving, or you're a closet fag.

 

[Whoopsie Daisy]

You're preaching to the choir about fitness being valuable for self improvement and general personal betterment, but after fairly recently having to listen to two  separate gymchad divorce sagas with obese unemployed wives that were sooo hot at first, you're missing the mark calling it a panacea.

Re read what you just put. Hot chads got hot wives. Wives got fat, they got divorced.

How is that not proof that hitting the gym gets you hot women? If the slags got fat after the chads put a ring on it, it's down to the chads for not keeping their wives in check.

 

[Squishie PP]

Cut his balls off, or start sneaking troonshine into his drink

 

[Daily Affirmation]

/r/loveafterporn is my current favorite sub. The women are all psycho. Their men are all gaslighting coomer assholes. It's glorious. One of the guys tried to kill himself and ended up in the icu because he couldn't exorcise the jerkoff demons.

 

[Wendell Stamps DoL]

wanking throughout history

Ancient Rome. Home of the mighty Caesar, the coliseum, and spaghetti. But was it also home to pickle tickling? You might be surprised by the answer, but I doubt it. That and a special report on the origins of the rub and tug, tonight on Wanking Throughout History!

 

[Bugman's Burden]

An out of shape man and an in shape man, all things equal academically, will find that the in-shape man gets the job, promotion or extra pay 9/10 over out of shape or unattractive people. Fact

And if an unattractive, short, or awkward guy goes to the gym he's still unattractive, short or awkward even after getting some sick gains. And no, going to the gym a bunch doesn't necessarily transform you into a different person -- that's just what the life coaches want you to believe. A fit guy can absolutely get mogged by a skinny fat dude if the other guy has more charisma. IME, women really don't give a shit about muscles to the point I wouldn't even put it in the top 10 reasons she'd decide to go with you.

You're creating this image of some average frustrated chump who decides to go to the gym, live healthier, then becomes Chad. To the extent that happens, the odds are about the same as winning the lottery. To suggest it as the typical experience just reminds me of all those fags on r/theredpill who would use the same story to pitch their alpha bootcamps.

 

[Carmen The Aids Rabbit]

Divorce him before he troons out

 

[Heed Not]

How is that not proof that hitting the gym gets you hot women? If the slags got fat after the chads put a ring on it, it's down to the chads for not keeping their wives in check.

The two longest lasting marriages that I know of (35 and 55 years respectively) are chubby to fat guys that never hit a gym recreationally. That's not to say being fat is  better than not, its just suggesting that physical fitness isnt the primary determining factor in a healthy relationship. You should go to the gym for yourself, and women being attracted to you is a happy side-effect. If you try to minmax some random woman's checklist for a chad, you run a very real risk of "now what?"-ing yourself into an unhappy relationship. You think a guy losing a house he paid for to a neet is thinking "well at least I don't jerk it!" ?.