🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

[NewnameRealEmail]

Ralph was definitely someone’s prison wife. I wonder if they put lipstick on a pig.

He’s lucky he didn’t end up with more time because he certainly is weak enough to be made into a crash test dummy.

 

[Vibralldo]

Ralph was definitely someone’s prison wife. I wonder if they put lipstick on a pig.

He’s lucky he didn’t end up with more time because he certainly is weak enough to be made into a crash test dummy.

DeMarkus made Ralph give him a guntjob.

 

[REGENDarySumanai]

Sometimes I think that Ethan would have had a better life if he stayed as West Memphis trailer trash with a simple life. Then you realize that the only reason why he has any form of notoriety is that he constantly makes a clown of himself when he LARPs as a normal person or a worldwide traveler. He truly is one of our prized pigs.

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

Did he buy a sow to impregnate for demon piglet 3? And why would that be a W for him, he doesn't pay any taxes, TAX FREE BISH.
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I’m too lazy to do it, but someone needs to do a modification of the creature walk slowly toward my house, screaming my name, meme image and make it Ethan Ralph.

As to the post above Ethan would have done much better being a welder or some other relatively well-paid manual labor job that he could figure out - he’s not a complete idiot he can do basic things - and he would’ve lived his happy little life doing his welder job and living in his trailer with Nora and a bunch of kids and just being basic white trash and he would’ve done fine. But because he got famous for a few minutes, he became bitch made.

 

[Muppetstudios]

Ethan Ralph will become the Gengis Khan of South America.

The only thing he has in common with Genghis Kahn is rape

 

[Necrosan]

Sometimes I think that Ethan would have had a better life if he stayed as West Memphis trailer trash with a simple life. Then you realize that the only reason why he has any form of notoriety is that he constantly makes a clown of himself when he LARPs as a normal person or a worldwide traveler. He truly is one of our prized pigs.

The simple life ain't for the Ralphamale.

That said, it's endearing to me how openly spineless he is. No matter how much he hates you, as soon as you have something he can use, he'll roll over and basically sweep it up for you.

He is not main villain material but he would make a great lackey for a main villain.

 

[Don'tAnalizeMeBro!]

He's such a swell, principled and upstanding guy, you wouldn't understand. Selfless supporter of his good, rich lawyer friend.
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That glaring omission that Aaron was responding to The Gunt’s challenge to fight is pretty funny.

 

[Rage Pig]

Piggy is obsessively reading KF again and wants to spread his jail wisdom.

The hidden reply, pig skin is thin.

 

[Obnoxious Asshole]

Piggy is obsessively reading KF again and wants to spread his jail wisdom.
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The "pod boss" speech he stole from a movie.

 

[Ultrapenguin]

Piggy is obsessively reading KF again and wants to spread his jail wisdom.

Looks like someone needs to block Kiwi Farms on the router again.

 

[parsnip]

When did he lose 100 pounds? It looks like he found them again.

 

[AncientPhosphur]

I bet Ethan Ralph is the kind of guy who’s like a turtle. Flip him on his back and he’s so weak and fat, pinned by his fat gunt, he can’t get up. He can try to flex his 15 lb weights all he wants but he’s so weak and fat he’d be imbolized by his fat gunt. I bet that’s what Ralph’s experience in prison was like. He got pushed down by other inmates and was Mutt’s lawed. Ethan Ralph the man who lost his virginity in prison.

 

[KosherFarms.net]

Ethan Ralph will become the Gengis Khan of South America. Every kid in Mexico will be born with their eyes looking at different directions.

Ethan Ralph singlehandedly birthing a new lineage of human pig hybrids down in south America

 

[Capt. Jean Luc Ritard]

Hi piggy, FYI 99% of us don't watch your show because it's boring and some retards will post the funny clips of you speaking Xantonese or struggling to lift a jug of water. You're projecting because you spend all day reading these comments but the obsession isn't mutual. Unless you bring back the yellow hat, in which case I'll watch every stream.

 

[Mr E. Grifter]

When did he lose 100 pounds? It looks like he found them again.

When he went to jail.

To be fair, if you saw the fucking size of Ralph when he swung at the cop you'd be shocked. He was easily pushing 350lb. You can catch a glimpse of him when he went to the Brianna Wu event and got asked to leave - he's like a greaseball.

This idea he lost 100lb through "legit training" is laughable. Not just because a fat, xanny brained basement dweller isn't going to be able to do high intensity exercise, but because you need a deficit of about 3500kcal to burn off 1lb. So he is trying to say he burned off 350000kcal via exercise. You would need to run a 5k, each day, as a normal sized man for just under 3 years straight to burn that off.

No, the reality is that Ralph was so fat that his maintenance calories were probably well above the norm, and he was eating well below the normal calorific intake... Because big bubba was stealing his honeybuns.

Edit:
I think this is the best angle in the video I could bother to find - but there are better ones. He's got the Gator physique.

 

[Trigger Me Timbers]

Piggy is obsessively reading KF again and wants to spread his jail wisdom.
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The hidden reply, pig skin is thin.
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Bwahhahh Lmao he actually used his lil piggy hooves to screenshot my post and cropped out all the hate facts. I have never ever felt compelled to ever screenshot anything Ralph’s wrote, but he did for me. Fucking amazing dance piggy dance.


And this does it for me, I did say it was only a rumor/hearsay that Ralph was a snitch but this fucking nails it for me. He only writes these novellas when he’s startled.
He snitched like a porky bitch and enjoyed his private lil cell and only being forced to go outside for one hour a day and having his meals brought directly to his trough. Shame he couldn’t use his commensary to buy sodas and candy so he lost weight.

Also I’m pretty sure that line his “pod boss” totes for real said about this being a “dream that happened to someone else” is taken whole cloth from a movie or TV show.

I think Ralph should totally fucking ownzone me by getting his “pod boss” on the illustrious KillStreeeem and fucking own me so hard.

He makes a point that he did jail not prison, which is true. But then he still had a “pod boss” and all that? Aight porky.

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

That’s why any post on the farms has to include hate facts on every - Ethan is fat - line.

 

[Rage Pig]

Lying through his teeth and describing himself as a total degenerate, just to get a crumb of attention from the Balldo.

 

[Look--an Alien!]

Lying through his teeth and describing himself as a total degenerate, just to get a crumb of attention from the Balldo.
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Ah couldnt care less, bish! Rekieta is mah new daddy and ah'll support him until the end of time, or until my next pillstream, whichever comes first!

 

[Rage Pig]

He's reduced to sitting in his stinky tin shack, desperately trying to attach himself to the drama his last remaining e-daddys are involved in. Also, is there a slight xannie slur? It's clear why he always wears sunglasses, he looks like complete retard without them.

Edit: My favorite part, he's coming for Vito' s spot.