Kevin Gibes / Kathryn Gibes / TransSalamander / RageTreb / The Green Salamander - "Am hole:" The epitomized Twitter MtF you thought was just a myth! Donate to his Transformers toy fund today!

[The Lawgiver]

It's not that deep, but the writers had to inject a bunch of cumbersome backstory into it to keep the overgrown manchildren who buy the comic books invested.

Nah that "cumbersome backstory"was specifically made to try and get kids more invested. And it did, so much so that the US transformers got carried into japan and nowadays has more japan and china shit than it does US shit in terms of region exclusive media.

See, it gets even weirder (though this is common knowledge to anyone into even a small amount of pop culture trivia shit) But originally transformers was a "localization" mix of reissued figures from older toylines in new colors schemes. Toylines that had their own "cumbersome lore" attached. Soundwave and Megatron are repurposed from Microman/Micronauts, and a good chunk of the rest of the cast are repurposed DIACLONE figures. You wanna know what Diaclone's lore was? Well good luck it was never released to the US but from what I've seen of it's literally cars that turn into mechs piloted by tiny human drivers to fight off a space pirate empire or some shit that drives mechs based on insects. Basically gundam but severely autistic in comparison to already autistic stuff. Shit was big enough that it got a reboot a few years back as an extremely expensive focused line of it's own despite previously basically being absorbed into what became transformers.

The state of transformers right now in the US is a case of ridiculous amounts of lore building up naturally overtime, and then some new writers coming in and deciding to half ass shit. Kids are definitely getting priced out of the actually quality toys though which is fucking sad.

 

[KiwiFuzz2]

Robotech > Transformers
Voltron > Transformers
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles > Transformers
Thundercats > Transformers
Muppet Babies > Transformers
Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers > Transformers
Tiny Toon Adventures > Transformers
DuckTales > Transformers
Bionic 6 > Transformers
Beverly Hills Teens > Transformers

Any questions?

 

[The Lawgiver]

Muppet Babies > Transformers

Any questions?

Yeah, is this you?

Also what's the amhole doing right now?

 

[AirdropShitposts]

This is believable.

This is literally true, God took Adam's rib and made a failed man. That's why she fucked things up and we all fell out of Eden. Checkmate, TERFs.

 

[AfghanBlue]

Kevin never seems to sell anything.

We have discussed this in the past, but collectorfags love stuff in boxes. Kevie opens everything.
Most of collection used to be in plastic tubs, all tossed in like a child would.

I wish I could nick one or two of his literal hundreds that he throws over his shoulder, "spent" after being "unboxed", for my little godson.
Who loves little crap toy cars so much they are dragged around everywhere adventure driving on every surface, all day, until they are broken husks.
He would LOVE playing with one.
I would love being lectured about it more if it had more details than "is broke little car".

It's so bleak and says so much that, having no psychial space or possibly to ever display them all, which even that would be a stupid waste - having unboxed them to devalue them for resale anyway - having millions of them in buckets and taking up extreme amounts of real estate in his houseshare - he has never thought to give even a fraction of them away as a donation to some kids who would absolutely love them.

There's laods of charitys for kids in children's homes, refugees, people who aren't affording presents for one reason or another.

I'm sure the kids on that Tranch-scam-of-yore Indian reservation (plus the multiple other ones, thousands of miles closer) would have much preferred some cool, modern looking, unplayed with big fancy toys, that could be shoved back into a box looking nearly new, for all a kid would care compared to some other Kevin clone collector.
You know, compared to what they got.

Loads of fucking disgusting unusable, unasked for alpaca hair to dispose of, for the good of the Tranch mugging their name and faces about for white saviour points.

In order to cheer this dreary post, allow me to share pictures from this news article recently about a (healthy) alpaca who was a groomsman at his owners wedding

 

[The Lawgiver]

having unboxed them to devalue them for resale anyway

"resale value" tied to box is a spook. there's actually some cases where keeping a toy in box slowly destroys it due to either chemical reactions or some kind of other weird factor like the pressure constantly pulling to keep it in box.

Who loves little crap toy cars so much they are dragged around everywhere adventure driving on every surface, all day, until they are broken husks.

Are they like dollar tree ones? Because those are the only ones I can think of that might fall apart like that lmao. I mean unless the kid has retard strength.
I wish they made transformers actually durable for kids like they used to, it's all either collector market stuff thinly veiled under a"also for kids" thing with the features kids like gutted, or hollow and bootleg tier garbage. it's been like this for roughly 10 years now give or take.

Spoiler: A good example

So I'm spoilering ths because Transformers sperging, but back when I was a kid there were several big Transformers lines known for being beefy and loaded with gimmicks. Beast wars/machines and Armada/energon/cybertron.
One of the coolest ones from the Armada series was Megatron who was ASS LOADED with complete cool toy nonsense despite turning into a tank. I'm talking jet launch ramps, moving missile launchers, pincer horns that you could pull off to simulate him getting damaged, a tiny garage with some grabbing claw thing that only really worked on extremely tiny things, a weird storage compartment in one leg, a FOLD OUT PLANE LAUNCHING RAMP, a FUCKING KNIFE THAT CAME OUT OF HIS HAND WHEN YOU PUSHED A LEVER. Had articulation everywhere but the knees and ankles too. Should be easy to replicate with modern engineering advancements and raised prices, right?

Haha, WRONG.

They made a remake, I bought it for nostalgia, it looks nice but the shoulders are all fucked up, there's a hand sculpted like it's meant to hold a knife but no knife accessory, and all the features are fake molded into the plastic, INCLUDING the ramp, the turret can't rotate a full 360 anymore, or even a full 180 because there's some nonsense plastic tab preventing it on the inside, it's like they just actively removed all the fun they could have kept and half assed the engineering. Literally all they had to do was reissue the original but give it knees and ankles to bring it up to "modern standards", but no, it has less features than the version from like 2016 where it was a retool of a g1 megatron figure. That one at least had a missile and some spots to plug other figures on.

Also the fake ramp is only HALF painted just to add insult to injury.
At least he's got mostly accurate proportions still I guess.

Remake:

Original:

 

[kazuhiro]

Spoiler: Helluva Boss plot spoiler, nothing NSFW

Kevin ponders the significance of the passage of time.

Kevin whines about other people posting "spoilers" but has no problem posting them himself.

More cartoon bullshit.



"Fellow queers."


His favorite games.

More Transformers posts.



That other guy's collection.

Further decadence.

 

[AMHOLIO]

I think the most mind blowing part is that now that he has all this real estate, he wants to fucking start cataloging what he has again. Not only has he bought what he admits will take him months, but he bought random plastic crap versions of them too (sorry @The Lawgiver for the decline in quality) he just throws in the fucking bin. He has multiple copies of things, and for fucking what? What is the end goal to Kathryn "Salamander" Gibes' fucking endless collection? And if something from the crappier pile went missing, would he even notice? Send it to any child, like @AfghanBlue 's nephew (after cleaning it of course). Send it to a fucking recycling center - it will get more use than Kevin does. He's going to sit there, staring blankly at a random fucking transformer in the pile of crap he has for 10 minutes, spend another 10 searching for it, then figure out it was Optimus Prime on a dime #3589. He's going to gloat he has every single fucking variation of a character.

I think the biggest plot twist is if someone stole something after the tranch debacle and Kevin actually fucking notices. That would be hilarious. SOMEONE TOOK SOUNDWAVE #893.5 QUICK ITS AN EMERGENCY I NEED TO SUE.


Note: he does not say he will pay you back.

 

[lecher]

I wish I could nick one or two of his literal hundreds that he throws over his shoulder, "spent" after being "unboxed", for my little godson

Beyond the mindless hedonism and existential nihilism, Kevin's most repulsive attribute has to be his boundless self-absorption.
It's not just that he refuses to confront the howling void of need at the core of his being and gleefully parades his spinelessness as an example for others.
It's that despite his "I'm such a dumb faggot" charade, Kevin always manages to have enough money in the bank for toys and trans-Atlantic trips.

In his fantasy, Kevin is an attractive queer woman with a big heart and lots of friends. But in the real world, Kevin is a calculating parasite with no redeeming qualities whatsoever. In the real world, Kevin hates himself, and rightly so.

 

[AfghanBlue]

That monster love pride teeshirt kind of comes across like some pro pedo thing, honestly. Like the codewords they use when reaching out online. "monster" "lover" and "pride" have all been misapproproated by them variously and continuously.

No, Kevin doesn't say he'll pay you back, and I still think we've yet to see him ever return the favour of sending another troon anything charitable, or even a gift to a friend. It's an oddly one way street, given as he's never done anything to deserve it, apart from it must just be some mystical troon hierarchy thing, the same that allows him to be randomly extremely touchy and rude to troons who reply to them, if they are not yet of requisite caste.

One thing that I'm surpsed hasn't tripped him up yet, trying to think using the inhouse rules of the circular firing squad -
How is that, in a purity culture of constant competition, it is not A Bad Thing to be asking for shekels constantly for extremely frivolous wants, when it could be very fairly argued that this soaks up the limited mutual aid community resources that could be sent towards troons in actual need - the ones "fleeing" transphobic violence, living in cars or mountains sides like the breakoff Tranch crew?
People who via the algorithm gods have a bigger reach and exposure and are able to scoop up those bits of free change like Kevin, at the expense of actual down and out trannies whose gofundme's for lifethreatening dysphoria surgery remain empty?

Like you'd think it would start to grate, and this would come from either the down and outs themsleves, or just the general audience who have never seen a let-up in Kevs wants, despite him having so much stuff now, posting about buying absolutely pointless shit, and just never being saited.

It's not just a little treat that everyone should have now and then to brighten their life, to treasure and value with gratitude, and pay that forward;
it's a constant, endless, every version of every release of every property, as soon as it exists, whilst also never "contributing" to these lame fandoms, such as such exists, like by creating genuine art or comment or community. He only soaks in.

People get tired of things: even other consoomers have a limit or a flicker of morality. Even that weird mopey self deprecating bumchum he had on twitter, who used to edge them about trooning / repressing it - he even begged Kevin via a sock burner account to not grift then display his new hoard the very next tweet, saying it's something that kiwifarms couldn't really actually be disagreed with about. That was a good few years ago now.

I just think it's weird that it hasn't tried peoples patience, especially the last year when everyone's budget has gotten significantly tighter. Maybe it's by virtue of moving to bluesky where it's way, way smaller of a troon ran echochamber.
Its seriously weird how long it's lasted without a significant breaking point though.

It's been said before but the rampant, abusive consumerism is most galling part of the entire Empire of Amhole for me.
He is like the human embodiment of a Zimbabwean trillion dollar note. (turned away in disgust by the humble local shopkeep)

 

[AMHOLIO]

People get tired of things: even other consoomers have a limit or a flicker of morality.

The only reason I'd ever poke the cow was to ask "why". What is the end goal? Why must he keep on top of these things? What happens if he falls behind or fails to obtain something? It's like a weird form of OCD, fear of missing out maximized.

I just think it's weird that it hasn't tried peoples patience, especially the last year when everyone's budget has gotten significantly tighter. Maybe it's by virtue of moving to bluesky where it's way, way smaller of a troon ran echochamber.
Its seriously weird how long it's lasted without a significant breaking point though.

I think he reigns it in on and off enough that he doesn't get called out enough for it. He is a sacred transwoman, who is trans and queer, and is surrounded by others who won't call him out, just occassionally donate or stay silent. Ignoring him is the best they can do.

 

[The Lawgiver]

Kevin whines about other people posting "spoilers" but has no problem posting them himself.

That character looks nothing like and probably acts nothing like Kev, but this at least unintentionally reminded me of a funny story.

Spoiler: THE STORY

See, over a decade ago where some artist who I was kinda following loosely on a social media blog (I didn't have an account on) around the time the smurfs 2 got announced said a similar " why the fuck is it just me?" kind of line about the flesh color smurfs they introduced in that movie. I shit you not it LITERALLY LOOKED LIKE THEY MADE THEM INTO A SMURF. THE PERSON HAD UNALTERED PHOTOS OF THEMSELVES ON THEIR BLOG BEFORE THE THING EVEN WAS ANNOUNCED. Shit's stuck with me for years and I wish I had the screengrabs because I've long since forgotten the person's username on whatever several popular blog sites that was on lmao. So I guess for reference of what the person looked like you can just look at the blue hair flesh smurf from that infamous movie and imagine it as like a full sized human. I think that's the sole reason I remember what the person looked like but nothing else.

His favorite games.

Banjo Kazooie is a game about a fat ugly bitch who lives in an autistically cluttered isolated lair in some middle of nowhere rural land kidnapping a literal child to steal her youth and become "attractive like her". Most people I wouldn't bat an eye at for saying Banjo's one of their favorite games but uhh... UHHHH...

More Transformers posts.

This is kind of interesting looking at half of these Kev seems to be either ignoring or holding off on the constant coomershit and trans mentions for once (save for shit like fucking spinister). If you didn't know who it was these posts in a bubble would read like your average social media figure reviewer, albeit a slightly confused one.

 

[stupid frog]

"resale value" tied to box is a spook. there's actually some cases where keeping a toy in box slowly destroys it due to either chemical reactions or some kind of other weird factor like the pressure constantly pulling to keep it in box.

You're correct, but in my experience collectors do not care. They want the box. They get mad if it's damaged in transit even though the box isn't the item.

I'm not reading about that show, but the new character is a tranny I assume?

 

[The Lawgiver]

You're correct, but in my experience collectors do not care. They want the box. They get mad if it's damaged in transit even though the box isn't the item.

I'm not reading about that show, but the new character is a tranny I assume?

Judging by the thumbnail it's not a tranny character, but there is one already apparently? Anyways it looks like it's supposed to be "wacky stereotypical weaboo who is also a romantic fangirl of main character" thing. I'm surprised they included something like that given the show apperently descended into forced as hell gay melodrama love triangle shit between blitzo, the rape owl, and the cyborg/robot clown from episode 2 that was blitzo's old boss. That and "wholesome 100" moments like there being a random deaf kid and characters suddenly out of nowhere knowing sign language.

 

[stupid frog]

Judging by the thumbnail it's not a tranny character, but there is one already apparently? Anyways it looks like it's supposed to be "wacky stereotypical weaboo who is also a romantic fangirl of main character" thing. I'm surprised they included something like that given the show apperently descended into forced as hell gay melodrama love triangle shit between blitzo, the rape owl, and the cyborg/robot clown from episode 2 that was blitzo's old boss.

I was guessing because of the coloring.



>DON'T SPOIL IT FOR ME
>spoils it for others

 

[Bill Evans 45]

What is the end goal to Kathryn "Salamander" Gibes' fucking endless collection?

It cannot coom so it must consoom.

 

[kazuhiro]

Another short and dull update.

Spoiler: Nothing NSFW

Voice training.

Fucking millennials.




More toys.

 

[Flamin Park]

It cannot coom so it must consoom.

I'm hoping for a housefire arc

A great disturbance in the lulz, as if millions of plastic robots suddenly cried out in terror, and were suddenly silenced

We'd get some 24 karat sperging from kevvy too

Lol at his voice trainer telling him what a dainty lady he sounds like, and yet not a single example has been posted. Protip Kev, if you turn up and sound like a scaffolder having a lunch pint with his mates, she still gets your money, she just has to keep you turning up

How about you show us all the evidence of your beautiful lady voice

 

[BunchofMunch]

I'm hoping for a housefire arc

Pennywise having one too many gulps of his bedside whisky and passing out with a lit joint in his mouth doesn't seem too far off. Or maybe Jen just finally losing his shit completely and setting everything on fire because some enbyphobe or whatever didn't agree with him on bluesky.

 

[Coo Coo Bird]

Beverly Hills Teens > Transformers

One of my favorite cartoon intros: