Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta - Polysubstance enthusiast, "Lawtuber" turned Dabbleverse streamer, swinger, "whitebread ass nigga", snuffs animals for fun, visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold who lost his license to practice law. Wife's bod worth $50. The normies even know.

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What would the outcome of the harassment restraining order be?

  • A WIN for the Toe against Patrick Melton.

    Votes: 63 17.6%
  • A WIN for the Toe against Nicholas Rekieta.

    Votes: 4 1.1%
  • A MAJOR WIN for the Toe, it's upheld against both of them.

    Votes: 93 26.0%
  • Huge L, felted, cooked etc, it gets thrown out.

    Votes: 60 16.8%
  • A win for the lawyers (and Kiwi Farms) because it gets postponed again.

    Votes: 138 38.5%

  • Total voters
    358
I will literally tell them stories of Nick Rekieta. The lawyer who shot to stardom . . . who fucked it all up literally for "strippers" and cocaine, and thought he could get away with it.
Make sure you include the part that he was never much of a lawyer at all and that his only "success" was a product of showing up and getting lucky, and that he had no ability to succeed in any real sense at all.

Fear and loathing in Spicer. Unfortunately, I doubt Nick can write like Hunter Thompson despite having a fancy college degree in creative writing same amount of drugs though, but Hunter never held himself as a lawyer family man.
If he were more interesting he could have been Neddy in Cheever's "The Swimmer" (which I highly recommend):

‘The Swimmer’ is a 1964 short story by the American writer John Cheever (1912-82), published in his collection The Brigadier and the Golf Widow.
The story is set in one of the suburbs of Westchester County in the state of New York, and begins with married couple Neddy and Lucinda Merrill at the house of their friends, the Westerhazys, one midsummer Sunday afternoon. Neddy, who is a keen swimmer, works out that he can leave the Westerhazys’ cocktail party and travel the eight miles back to his home by working his way through a series of his friends’ back gardens, swimming the length of their swimming pools as he goes. He thinks about his four daughters who are waiting at home.

When Lucinda asks him where he is going, he tells her he is going to swim home. He begins to do so, visiting the various gardens and swimming pools of his friends and swimming across each pool before continuing on his journey.
[...]
Continuing on his journey, Neddy makes his way through the traffic to the public pool, where the water is less clear and salubrious than at the earlier pools he’d swum in; he also finds the various rules at the pool off-putting. Nevertheless, he braves the waters and continues to the house of an elderly couple known as the Hallorans.

They are political reformers who are suspected of being Communists (although in fact they are not), and Neddy recalls that they swim naked in their pool. So as a mark of respect, when he reaches their pool and explains what he is doing, he removes his trunks and swims the length of their pool, naked.

Before he leaves, Mrs Halloran tells him she was sorry to hear about his misfortunes, and the fact that he’d had to sell his house and something had happened to his ‘poor children’. This is news to Neddy, who is sure that his children are at home. As he leaves their garden, he starts to feel lame and worn out. What had seemed a good idea at the outset now seemed less so.
Once he has drunk a whiskey, Neddy swims the length of their pool and continues on his way. The next pool on his route belongs to Shirley Adams, Neddy’s former mistress, although he cannot remember when they had an affair. He remembered being the one who had ended the affair, however, and how this had made Shirley upset.

Shirley is frosty when she sees him, and refuses to give him a drink. She also suspects he is after money, and tells Neddy that she has company. He swims her pool, struggling to climb out because he is now so exhausted. He sees a young man inside Shirley’s bathhouse. Suddenly, as he feels the summer turning to autumn, Neddy feels overwhelmed by sadness and cries for probably the first time in his adult life.

Fatigued, he swims two more pools belonging to the Gilmartins and the Clydes, paddling the latter because he is so tired. He realises he has finished the final swim but his triumph is of a vague kind.

When he arrives home, he finds the house plunged in darkness and rust on the handles of the garage doors. He wonders if the cook or maid had accidentally locked up the house, but then recalls that they have not employed either a cook or a maid for some time.

The story ends with Neddy pounding on the door and looking in at the windows, realising that the house is completely empty.

Perhaps the most significant key to understanding ‘The Swimmer’ can be found in a comment John Cheever himself made. He noted that he initially planned to write a story about a kind of latter-day Narcissus, that figure from Greek mythology who shunned those who loved him only to be destroyed when he caught sight of his reflection in the water and fell in love with his own beauty.
[...]
His curse is to realise that his life has in fact already been destroyed, his marriage is over, his children have disappeared, and he has lost his house: the modern American suburban equivalent of drowning and having your body turned into flowers (which is what happened to Narcissus).

As someone described on Gawker,
In the final paragraph, now home and exhausted, Neddy realizes that he has lost everything, and worse, everyone he truly loved. Yet the process and details remain mysterious. The final word of the story is empty, nothing is left to keep him afloat.

It’s a terribly depressing conclusion, but it has to be. “The Swimmer” is about not being grateful, and not being sufficiently aware of the world around you.

Sadly, Nick is not an interesting literary character, not a self-absorbed heavy-drinking WASP snob who doesn't even realize he's lost it all; he is not even the creepy anti-hero in his favorite suburban and middle-aged ennui film. He's just a tacky, trashy joke.
 
Sadly, Nick is not an interesting literary character, not a self-absorbed heavy-drinking WASP snob who doesn't even realize he's lost it all; he is not even the creepy anti-hero in his favorite suburban and middle-aged ennui film. He's just a tacky, trashy joke.
Slightly tangential to your point, but I find it interesting.

There is a certain temptation I notice people have to see lolcows as sort of characters, but their lives aren't fiction and don't behave as such. You get little moments that feel cinematic, like Nick's drunk stream happening right before his arrest, but really anything can happen. But in the end there is an overwhelming probability that this will end in some anti-climactic way. Nick may ultimately be given a slap on the wrist, or a short sentence, and simply return to living unaffected by his actions, alternatively he could be found by his child minutes from now face down in a pile of fentanyl laced cocaine, and he'll just be another dead thread.

Watching Nick back in the good ol' days, he got me to see lawyers as storytellers, who turn real spontaneous events into a coordinated narrative for the sake of a jury. It has been ironic, his life has become a story, and he has set himself as the villain. I guess he's not a very good lawyer.
 
There are legal ways to be drugged up on all of the stimulants (coke) or depressants (ketamine) that he, Kayla, and April require. The court orders specifically allow for legal prescriptions.
No-one is going to give Nick a prescription for legal cocaine. Its only medical uses are as a local anaesthetic and for reducing bleeding. It's possible that Kayla may have a ketamine prescription, depending on the laws regarding ketamine treatment in MN (here, the dose is self-administered in a medical setting and a psychiatrist must oversee treatment).
Can he testify remotely? I thought face-to-face confrontation was presumptive and the state needs a compelling reason to not have them there. Covid quarantines were a compelling reason. In a felony criminal trial, isn't the court going to want a really good reason the witness can't present themselves to the jury for direct observation?
It's unlikely MN has any power to compel Geno to give testimony, whether remotely or in person.
 
I might be seeing things through rose colored glasses, but I would hope that as a father he saw the state of the nicks kids, and the threat to his own kids which made him come forward. on top of the fact he is stupid and jealous.

Yeah, the normal thing to do in those circumstances is to contact the police or CPS, not to start yapping about it on your podcast. Because people would get the impression that you care less about the kids and more about creating content you can monetize.\

Carlin (one of the GOATs) I think truly captures all of what's wrong with today's younger leaning millennials and Gen Zer's. See spoiler for video.

Nah, Carlin is the beginning of the slippery slope. The point at which comedians decided it was less important to be funny than it is to share your political opinions with your audience -- and because they agreed with you, they'd bray in acknowledgement. What they weren't doing is laughing. When he veers away from politics and attempts to be 'funny', you get dogshit like his hippy dippy weatherman, which has to be the corniest, unfunniest shit I've ever seen.

Watch one of his specials next to a Richard Prior special. Prior's work still holds up because the guy was genuinely funny. Carlin was just the archetypal 'old man shaking fist at cloud'. And he's fathered a whole tribe of so-called 'comedians' who make no attempt at being funny -- they just rely on their politics to carry them through. Trevor Noah, Jon Stewart and every cunt who ever showed up on a Radio 4 comedy show.
 
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Fear and loathing in Spicer. Unfortunately, I doubt Nick can write like Hunter Thompson despite having a fancy college degree in creative writing same amount of drugs though, but Hunter never held himself as a lawyer family man.
I know ralph talks about Hunter like he is his daddy, but has nick? Nick strikes me as the kind of guy to think there is no one at the top but him. Kinda why when he drinks he always talks down to people about his life, while never saying anything concrete.
 
It's unlikely MN has any power to compel Geno to give testimony, whether remotely or in person.
Yes, but that's different than what I was asking. People have postulated he could testify by Zoom or other remote fashion. I don't know why that would allowed. It might be more convenient for Geno and make it easier for the state to prove their case but witnesses are presumptively supposed to testify in person in criminal trials. If Geno says, "I'll testify but I'm not travelling to MN" does the state still get to use him as a witness?
 
It has been ironic, his life has become a story, and he has set himself as the villain. I guess he's not a very good lawyer.
But it’s not the opposite of the literal intention. Nick channel was never a law channel. He hated trial streams. He wanted to talk about himself. He wanted to be the story. He should have been more careful for what he asked. He certainly got it.
 
Yeah, the normal thing to do in those circumstances is to contact the police or CPS, not to start yapping about it on your podcast. Because people would get the impression that you care less about the kids and more about creating content you can monetize.\



Nah, Carlin is the beginning of the slippery slope. The point at which comedians decided it was less important to be funny than it is to share your political opinions with your audience -- and because they agreed with you, they'd bray in acknowledgement. What they weren't doing is laughing. When he veers away from politics and attempts to be 'funny', you get dogshit like his hippy dippy weatherman, which has to be the corniest, unfunniest shit I've ever seen.

Watch one of his specials next to a Richard Prior special. Prior's work still holds up because the guy was genuinely funny. Carlin was just the archetypal 'old man shaking fist at cloud'. And he's fathered a whole tribe of so-called 'comedians' who make no attempt at being funny -- they just rely on their politics to carry them through. Trevor Noah, Jon Stewart and every cunt who ever showed up on a Radio 4 comedy show.
I have mixed feelings about Carlin. He definitely became preachy, dark, and nihilistic later in his career, and he paved the way for many comics who get applause instead of laughter. But he was also a talented stand-up who hated PC language. His bit on “shell shock” becoming “battle fatigue,” and now “PTSD,” is tremendous, as is his take on how soft language creates soft people. He was a cantankerous guy, and if he were alive today, he’d either get canceled or, like Howard Stern, claim to be super woke.
 
I have mixed feelings about Carlin. He definitely became preachy, dark, and nihilistic later in his career, and he paved the way for many comics who get applause instead of laughter. But he was also a talented stand-up who hated PC language. His bit on “shell shock” becoming “battle fatigue,” and now “PTSD,” is tremendous, as is his take on how soft language creates soft people. He was a cantankerous guy, and if he were alive today, he’d either get canceled or, like Howard Stern, claim to be super woke.
He’d be gargling tranny cock and sperging out about Christofacists on Twitter while occasionally dropping a toothless slur to maintain a pretense at edginess.
 
Daxipad is Nick's spiritual liege and life coach though. Juju is only a theoretical stand up comedian, much like Nick.

I mean when Nick performed his routine after Chrissie Mayr's father was killed, who was Nick aping? Or when he workshops his jokes while livestreaming. It wasn't Daxipad. His only bits are yelling and calling women fat.
 
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Wait, so Nick’s lawyer made a big fuss about responding to the prosecution’s response, something that puzzled the judge, but then he didn’t bother even filing the response on time? I genuinely hope Nick isn’t paying this man anything
 
Regarding the Rekeita's legal drugs, I've known people on Provigil and Ketamine and have learned a little about them. Provigil is a histamine agonist, basically the opposite of Benadryl (hence the stuffy nose side effect.) It doesn't work like Ritalin or Adderall, which are basically diet meth (not a judgment, they totally work when necessary.) You can take both at the same time responsibly and since they work on different mechanisms you won't be tweaking, Provigil should be taken with more than one Dorito and it won't work properly if you're drinking alcohol. If he takes it sporadically and at different times, it's not likely he has actual narcolepsy. He'd never admit to sleep apnea, a much more common cause of excessive sleepiness, because it's a fat person problem that a skinny legend like him would never have. A bigger nose does not mean better breathing and there could be internal structural issues.

As far as I'm aware, Ketamine has to be administered in a facility where a medical professional can monitor your "trip." It's rare to get a home prescription. Also, long-term use of benzos (xanax, ativan, etc) can bork your dopamine production and cause worse depression. Then you're taking antidepressants to counteract the benzos and as they say in the medical profession, you're shit's all fucked up.

I am not a medical doctor nor am I treating either of them, just citing my own observations from the mental health field.
 
Wait, so Nick’s lawyer made a big fuss about responding to the prosecution’s response, something that puzzled the judge, but then he didn’t bother even filing the response on time? I genuinely hope Nick isn’t paying this man anything
That's what hiring a Barneswalker gets you.
 
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Forgive me for asking sonlate, but earlier people were saying that April is disposable to Nick whenever the legal trials are finished. Are there signs he's planning on dumping his younger trophy gf for an even younger one? Or would he do this just because it would be funny to him and she is more trouble than she is worth?
 
I have mixed feelings about Carlin. He definitely became preachy, dark, and nihilistic later in his career, and he paved the way for many comics who get applause instead of laughter. But he was also a talented stand-up who hated PC language. His bit on “shell shock” becoming “battle fatigue,” and now “PTSD,” is tremendous, as is his take on how soft language creates soft people. He was a cantankerous guy, and if he were alive today, he’d either get canceled or, like Howard Stern, claim to be super woke.
I actually went to a Carlin show at the historic Saenger Theater in New Orleans (where Richard Pryor filmed Here and Now) and it was crushingly bad. He walks out with a notepad, tells the audience that he was working on material for his next HBO special and then reads jokes to us from the notepad for an hour before leaving. People bought tickets expecting an HBO-level performance but nope. It was infuriating. I also saw Howie Mandel around the same time in what was basically a high school gym in the middle of nowhere and that dude riffed for almost 4 hours making fun of our town but in a fun way. It was like he had lived there his entire life. It was amazing,
 
Slightly tangential to your point, but I find it interesting.

There is a certain temptation I notice people have to see lolcows as sort of characters, but their lives aren't fiction and don't behave as such. You get little moments that feel cinematic, like Nick's drunk stream happening right before his arrest, but really anything can happen. But in the end there is an overwhelming probability that this will end in some anti-climactic way. Nick may ultimately be given a slap on the wrist, or a short sentence, and simply return to living unaffected by his actions, alternatively he could be found by his child minutes from now face down in a pile of fentanyl laced cocaine, and he'll just be another dead thread.

Watching Nick back in the good ol' days, he got me to see lawyers as storytellers, who turn real spontaneous events into a coordinated narrative for the sake of a jury. It has been ironic, his life has become a story, and he has set himself as the villain. I guess he's not a very good lawyer.
But it’s not the opposite of the literal intention. Nick channel was never a law channel. He hated trial streams. He wanted to talk about himself. He wanted to be the story. He should have been more careful for what he asked. He certainly got it.

I think this is a very insightful point of view that approximates Nick view of himself. The way he frames himself as an 'entertainer', wanting to be a writer in university that led to his Writing Degree, and manifesting in his heretical interpretations of Scriptures.

This sheds light on how and why he has a creative approach to relaying 'the truth' as a narrative that allows him to play semantic games and bend morality. He re-frames the story in a way that is not 'lies' but most favourable to him--no matter how twisted and unlikely.

This lets him imply that 'someone' planted cocaine, call it a 'lie' if the police officer is not clear about which video he watched, and keeps the 'I never revealed where my holiday was, so you cannot PROVE I went to Hedonism!' alive. It also explains the try-hard 'racist cop on the bus' and 'hood cred' stories.

Nick badly wants to re-shape reality like a story where he is the hero. He is deeply upset with how his life ended up and wants to change others' perception of him (the story) if he cannot change the real facts. Nick's worst fear is facing reality.

Forgive me for asking sonlate, but earlier people were saying that April is disposable to Nick whenever the legal trials are finished. Are there signs he's planning on dumping his younger trophy gf for an even younger one? Or would he do this just because it would be funny to him and she is more trouble than she is worth?

It was in the context that he has incentive now to keep her happy--to the detriment of his own relationship with Qayla--where he has to defend her when it is not advisable for him to do so for his own image. She has diet she could spill, and that might hurt him now more than ever, so he might be motivated to keep her happy--even if, theoretically, he did jot want to.

*If* things were to change, it would likely not be until after resolution of the criminal case becuase of these practical concerns.
 
Sean might well be eating good this weekend.
Sean eats good for every single meal, he doesn't skip any and invented several more.
(I know I've made this joke over a dozen times but I still think it's funny, okay?)

The bulk of the "trauma" likely came from the doctor they both held in high esteem. Nick hates being laughed at by women in general, but being made to feel insecure by a man he respected while being laughed at by his wife really got under his skin. Nick also seems petty enough to have this encounter (inflicted by his own biblical misconceptions) sour whatever beliefs he had regarding Scripture.
Screw scripture, this balldo-wearing skeleton needs to go back to middle school.

This is where the qover comes from
She's so cringe it even carried into the names of her children. There was an interesting new matter of public records where she even admitted to it.
"Because I'm that kind of mum" or something, it occurred when the court misspelled one of the children's incomprehensible names.
 
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