Not Just Bikes / r/fuckcars / Urbanists / New Urbanism / Car-Free / Anti-Car - People and grifters who hate personal transport, freedom, cars, roads, suburbs, and are obsessed with city planning and urban design

[Xarpho's Return]

How would they react when their bike gets niggered? If they say they should have locked it up to prevent it from being stolen, is that "victim blaming"?

Point being "victim blaming" is used as a cudgel to shut down any discussion of solutions that don't involve banning cars.

Apart from the usual answers about crime and theft since urbanism and "Justice Democrat" ideas are joined at the hip, as far as urbanism answers go, if your bike gets stolen due to socioeconomic factors, it was because there aren't enough pedestrians to provide "eyes on the street".

Reality of course is if we look at the scummier cities (including Europe, particularly Italy) out there with lots of pedestrians, that doesn't work. If you're the only person walking on the sidewalk, for instance, and anyone else is a full arms' length away, the chances of you being pickpocketed is zero, whereas in "pedestrian" cities that happens all the time.

There's also a wealth of videos that show bike thieves brazenly stealing bicycles in broad daylight. I'd also be willing to bet that sort of thing happens all the time in Amsterdam-Centrum, especially in the evening hours when bars are hopping. (Drunk and high customers are easy marks).

This isn't to say "eyes on the street" is complete trash. There is a mild theft deterrent to have an unarmed, non-pursuing employee at the door and generally that served Wal-Mart well for years when their stores were only in small towns and predominantly white suburbs...but in actual cities that falls apart to the point where they'll put up gates and other features and still end up leaving empty Supercenter boxes behind.

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

Fucking catholics screwing it up for everyone again! As the dominant religion they should .... wait, what's that, you say? Jews report as No Religion these days? Carry on!

It's amazing how the consequences of their own actions continues to beat them over the head about how stupid they are, and how they refuse to even consider that they might be wrong, or even just misguided.

Also, anyone who lives in NYC gets exactly what they deserve. There's no excuse anymore.

 

[Yamamura]

"eyes on the street".

This is just an unrelated stupid thing that makes me laugh, but visually in my head whenever I picture "eyes on the street", I mentally picture some guy getting beat up on a subway and people vertically filming it on their phone while hooting and hollering.

That's literally the first thing that my mind associates that term to.

 

[quaawaa]

/r/fuckcars user is mad that people think cars are more comfortable than biking:

"I would absolutely rather be on my bike in heavy rain than in a car.":


Elevators should cost money:


"You won't be comfortable if you keep driving because climate change will destroy the world":

Driving is like taking heroin:

Bikes are bad because they're still private transport:

Source (Archive)

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

more and more I just want to shake these people and yell in their face as loud as I can: "YOU WANT TO LIVE IN A SMALL TOWN WITH PEOPLE LIKE YOU, YOU FUCKING FREAK! JUST DO IT!"

Also what the fuck, a 20 minute bike ride is about 4 miles based on quickly googled averages (12 mph for a bike in a city). A four mile walk is about an hour to an hour and a half. Fuck pubic transit if it's literally slower than walking!

 

[Xarpho's Return]

Elevators should cost money:

Boy, I would love to get into an argument about how that harms disabled people and then watch them get into arguments if having some bullshit "muh spoons" disability qualifies you for free elevator rides.

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

Boy, I would love to get into an argument about how that harms disabled people and then watch them get into arguments if having some bullshit "muh spoons" disability qualifies you for free elevator rides.

See, if I was a building supervisor and wanted to make me some healthy niggers, I'd devize a stairway system where you could get INTO the stairwell for free, but when you left (and you couldn't leave on the floor you came in), it would give you a dime, or a quarter, or a penny.

Like returning a cart at Aldis. Sure, some niggers would run up and down the stairs (it's about 30 seconds for a round trip, say, for a pretty healthy person, so at a nickel per door it would be $6/hr) but everyone would be healthy.

Brilliant idea. Like that minimum wage machine. https://mymodernmet.com/minimum-wage-machine/ (a)

Hell, lots of welfare and assistance should be like that damn machine lol

 

[ᚠᚢᚦᚩᚱᚳ]

I remember seeing that video on page 236 of this thread, actual insanity.

I've been watching that video and it's so nuts that I downloaded a local copy. As a sort of reverse example, I'm surprised nobody has mentioned ZeroEnigma and even more surprised he doesn't have his own thread. His entire forum presence is one comment in the YouTube Autism thread.

If the racers in the video are Jonas Vingegaard wannabes who blatantly disregard traffic laws at risk of serious injury or death for everyone around them, ZeroEnigma wants to let you and everyone else know that there are in fact rules of the road, that he follows them impeccably, that you're the scum of the earth for daring to temporarily stop in a bike lane, and that as of this writing, he's got 215 videos to prove it.

This guy's autism is off the charts and his ego is as fragile as they come. Apparently all he does is bike around NYC shouting at drivers and pedestrians for being present in the bike lane that belongs to him and him alone. He even starts each video with a sanctimonious little trigger warning.

 

[quaawaa]

Apparently all he does is bike around NYC shouting at drivers and pedestrians for being present in the bike lane that belongs to him and him alone.

He also deliberately seeks out the most pedestrian dense areas of the city to make his videos in. His most recent video is him riding through Times Square:

and Herald Square:


NYC is slowly pedestrianizing Broadway (which runs through both Times and Herald Squares), but the bikebrained government decided to not actually create pedestrian plazas and instead they just put the road on an extreme diet leaving only a bike lane. The guy is a retard for yelling at tourists who don't expect cyclists to be barreling through what looks like an outdoor dining area.

Another example:

 

[WelperHelper99]

Was told to bring this discussion here. Remember those "15 minute cities" in the UK? This is now entering USA discourse. I was surveyed a week ago about if I had ever heard about 15 minute cities, and today YouGov released a chat survey asking people's opinions about them. It didn't mention anything about the fact that you are limited to your district and would need a permit to drive outside of it.

These 15 minute cities didn't do well in the UK, right? So what hope do they have of it happening in the USA?

Americans would have to give up their cars. Not happening. It would make going into cities hell.

Driving is like taking heroin:

I actually agree. Driving is nice like drugs. Even in my old 03 Malibu, it's nice to let that 3.1L V6 purr. This is not the comparison you think it is.

 

[ᚠᚢᚦᚩᚱᚳ]

The guy is a retard for yelling at tourists who don't expect cyclists to be barreling through what looks like an outdoor dining area.

I seriously wonder if he's mentally deficient. His vocabulary is fairly limited and looks like some kind of autistic stimming or tics:

• "Wrong way, dumbass!"
• "Why are you stupid?"
• "That's a nice bike you got there!"
• "Where's the sidewalk?"
• "Bang!"

Ironically, despite "endangering no one," he's been in multiple crashes. I'm sure there's more, and it's usually him hitting pedestrians due to his belief that walking in proximity of a bike lane gives him the divine right to run you over. If you really think about it, four collisions is an absurd amount of danger. Most serious cyclists in major cities can reasonably expect a few close calls and maybe one real crash in their biking career.

Back to the MonsterTrack fixie race in NYC, apparently last year some retard slammed headfirst into a car while running a red light and going the wrong way down a road.

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

Ironically, despite "endangering no one," he's been in multiple crashes. I'm sure there's more, and it's usually him hitting pedestrians due to his belief that walking in proximity of a bike lane gives him the divine right to run you over. If you really think about it, four collisions is an absurd amount of danger. Most serious cyclists in major cities can reasonably expect a few close calls and maybe one real crash in their biking career.

Even cars usually have some variation of "the pedestrian is always to be yielded to, even when wrong" simply because the pedestrian loses every time. The same is true of bikes, I daresay.

Why spend billions of dollars on NYC cops if they don't climb up the asses of assholes like this?

 

[Markass the Worst]

I'm surprised nobody has mentioned ZeroEnigma and even more surprised he doesn't have his own thread. His entire forum presence is one comment in the YouTube Autism thread.

He's not the only one, there's a lot of cyclists that act like this. I've been meaning to write a thread on them.

 

[ᚠᚢᚦᚩᚱᚳ]

The same is true of bikes, I daresay.

If you watch ZeroEnigma's little intros, it quickly becomes apparent that his concept of the law revolves around the fact that NYC DOT's informational videos depict a pedestrian looking before crossing a bike lane. Therefore, it doesn't matter if he hits them because he's actually the victim of their unawareness. There's a few instances where he deliberately hits people, because of course he's more justified to do so than to yield the right of way.

I've been meaning to write a thread on them.

Please do, your OPs are the quality standard I hope to meet. Informative, compelling and funny narration, and of course, lots of dirt. I've had the displeasure to personally interact with tons of douchebag bikers, from the pretend racers to the jannies who admonish you for safely clearing a red light because "it's not your turn."

 

[indomitable snowman]

There's a few instances where he deliberately hits people, because of course he's more justified to do so than to yield the right of way.

What a psychopath.
Let's see him try it in the hood in NYC and get wasted by some gangbanger

 

[ᚠᚢᚦᚩᚱᚳ]

Let's see him try it in the hood in NYC and get wasted by some gangbanger

I wish, but I'm pretty sure he works in tech in a more upscale neighborhood. I can't sift through the sheer volume of his prodigious autism, but there's definitely one video where he's riding at dusk and runs into a fan, with whom he has a lengthy conversation about his life outside being a dickhead to random people for little or no reason.

Anyway, to circle back to the wider discussion of urbanist lolcows, the douchebag biker phenomenon is an IRL example of their endgame. ZeroEnigma and his ilk are a living example of the inherent stress involved with living in "dense, urban housing" with "multimodal streets" and "good land use." It's not like Amsterdam is magically exempt from road rage, either, despite the saccharine depictions of the urbanists. Living in any major city is inherently stressful, as most people who've actually done so for an extended period can confirm. In fact, a big reason why I left was because I could feel a visceral hatred of others gradually infecting me. Not to mention, silence and darkness are valuable amenities in their own right, and much rarer and significant than museums and restaurants.

 

[quaawaa]

Supposedly this is ZeroEnigma's dox: https://archive.ph/1joOb

 

[ᚠᚢᚦᚩᚱᚳ]

Supposedly this is ZeroEnigma's dox: https://archive.ph/1joOb

The profile for him [a] checks out, especially being related to Bridgit with an unconventional spelling. I'm not too familiar with NYC, but it seems reasonable that 388 Pearl St Apt 9I, New York, NY 10038 is consistent with where he usually bikes, being only 4 miles from Midtown Manhattan. Uribe is also a relatively uncommon surname [a] so it's a pretty specific identification if the info is accurate.

Sure enough, in the intro to his latest video he passes James Market [a] while complaining about some guy's motorcycle engine, which is down the street from his alleged apartment. Some other random landmarks from the beginning include Handbag Heaven and Casa Bella. Seeking closer to the middle, we see The Dickens and Pelé Soccer near Times Square. Toward the end we see the Mott Street Eatery and Canton Lounge.

Bro really is just angrily commuting to work and doxxing himself along the way. Also, his little cope laugh after he cleverly calls some random person a dumbass absolutely kills me.

 

[quaawaa]

388 Pearl St Apt 9I, New York, NY 10038

Dude lives in public housing:

Source
388 Pearl St is Building 7 on the map.

I'm surprised he doesn't bitch about his neighbors parking on the sidewalk:

 

[ᚠᚢᚦᚩᚱᚳ]

388 Pearl St is Building 7 on the map.

That's fucking hilarious. Now I need to find that video where he talks to a fan for like 10 minutes about his life. I've been trying to determine if he's uniquely unhinged enough to warrant his own thread distinct from a general "bike douchebag" thread. Between the fact that he has over 100 hours of this content, throws a fit over things so minor as neglecting to use a turn signal, and repetitively uses strange and easily stereotyped insults like "cum catcher" (slang for tramp stamp) and "Candy Crushing" (specifically for police using phones in squad cars), I'm tending toward yes.

Especially because he believes that he's on a mission to educate the citizens of NYC about traffic etiquette through tough love and acts overly gracious on the rare occasions he yields right of way, when in reality he's just a public menace and seriously dangerous to pedestrians. It's unknown whether he actually reports the standing taxis whose license plates he recites.

Another factor in favor of independent lolcow status is how argumentative he is in the comments. Someone tells him he's acting like a child and he triple posts with a rant about how if he doesn't continue with his brand of community outreach, NYC drivers will continue to be terrible and children will die because someone parked in the bike lane.

Fun fact, to remember his username I did a YouTube search for "New York bike guy yelling." Apparently someone had an archival channel for him called "bike lane guy."