You just don't get it, do you?
Nick, people are judging you because you're a prideful piece of shit.
How many people here would just LOVE for Nick to make a post, admit he fucked up? How many people would respect and even sympathize with him and let off the gas? Its hard to admit you fucked up so thoroughly, but you need to do it.
Why is it always everyone else's fault? Now it's CHRISTIANS' fault for practicing their faith wrong? Being a little judgemental? Not you, the cocked up swinger who fed drugs to a 9 year old? Are you fucking serious!!? Why is it that any semblance of self-reflection has been deflected to "muh mental health?" which shifts the blame of YOUR ACTIONS to nameless brain chemicals that make you the victim. Then you turn around and start paying money you definitely don't have to some fat pedophile to keep sexually griefing CHILDREN of a man you don't like.
Nick, you are scum. Repent before God. Repent before the law. Drop the ego and PROSTRATE YOURSELF. Admit the problem is YOU then get the fuck off the internet and do your time like a man.
This is why I don't jive with the "Muh addiction" narrative that some people seem to live by. Yes, he's an addict but no, it doesn't answer many things prior to that addiction. "Addiction" only stymes inhibition to amplify what already exists. You are blaming the substance the man abused and not the man. Man is more powerful than substance. Man needs to be held accountable. Pay attention to how often awful people will defer their problems unto the nameless brainchem phantom, "Mental health"
I work in film, and see this shit all the time. Pathological assholes who always blame it on "poor mental health." No, you're just a shitty person.