Lolcow Anthos the Crimson Impulse / Anthony Christian Bapst / The Unknown Autobot / TheMagus772 - Troll Hunter

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*sigh*, there's just no pleasing a Mary Sue now, is there?
From the article on his mechsona:
Fursona (Or 'Mechsona', As The Unknown Autobot Prefers)
In the grand tradition of Sonichu and other original characters created by aspie basement dwellers, Anthos the Crimson Impulse, as The Unknown Autobot likes to be called, is a composite character mashed together, Frankenstein-like, out of various other copyrighted characters from various different franchises that The Unknown Autobot enjoys, in the mistaken belief that by combining several things that are awesome on their own, the result will be even more awesome than the sum of its parts, as opposed to resembling something that the 1980s took a shit on.
However, unlike Chris-chan who at least had the decency to stop at combining two copyrighted characters into one whole to make his original creation, The Unknown Autobot crams about six or seven seperate things into one character, adding more elements as and when he discovers something new that he thinks is kewl.
As such, The Unknown Autobot's mechsona, Anthos the Crimson Impulse, is supposedly a forever youthful 250 year old Cybertronian Autobot space pirate/timelord/Toy Soldier/power ranger super sentai/Jedi knight/anthropomorphic gundam with silver, metallic skin and long white hair wearing a red trenchcoat stolen from Dante off of Devil May Cry and the red sunglasses of Kamina from Gurren Lagann, who can do magick and wields an enchanted sword from Soul Calibur and the gun of that faggot from Torchwood. As well as running his own furry strip club/brothel, La Zona Sicura, Anthos is also quite the ladies' man with a predilection for fucking the furry equivalents of fat chicks, fembois, little kids and even his own flesh and blood.
Really, this character could pretty much sum up the words "Mary Sue". I guess all that is missing is a tragic back-story.
 
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The tragedy is that it exists.

No, the tragedy is that it's somehow worse than all the other Sues I've seen. Because as bad as A-log's fursona and Marina are, they at least have a personality (kinda stretching it though). Plus they (said OCs) never claimed to be more than one damn thing.
 
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No, the tragedy is that it's somehow worse than all the other Sues I've seen. Because as bad as A-log's fursona and Marina are, they at least have a personality (kinda stretching it though). Plus they (said OCs) never claimed to be more than one damn thing.
Yeah, all Marina claims is being in Kingdom Hearts without the Final Fantasy characters while A-Log's character was some playboy who slept with OC's, female cartoon and vidya game characters, and female furry characters. Anthos on the other hand is a swashbuckling auto-bot who would basically have a pony form, Na'vi form, and is also some guy who has a harem of men and women, one of whom is Rarity (judging by a screencapped post on his article which also makes me wonder, is it some furry anthro version or is it the 100% pony version), the fictional son of his OC (Seriously, why?), some female OC's, and some OC's from friends of his.
 
Apparently, his deity is Odin. I'm sure those who know of Odin might not be pleased. Also, the description of Anthos:
A striking, debonair figure, Anthos The Crimson Impulse appears more wandering spellcaster then spacefaring buccaneer- his trademark red longcoat covered in trophies from past battles, a belt laden with pouches, a pistol-holster and a scabbard for a sword, buckled with an arcane device known as the WizarDriver, through which Anthos channels powerful magicks via Wizard Rings. Completing the look of an adventurous mage is the tall, wide-brimmed red hat perched atop long, snowy locks pulled back in a long tail.
His face, while handsome, is unconventionally so- a pair of vents where a nose would be on a normal human, a stripe of bright crimson just under his jewel-like green eyes, and a black metal plate resembling a goatee adorning his chin complete the features of his visage.

Also Anthos despises his real name which is "Anthony". That does remind me a bit of A-Log, both lol-cows sharing the name Anthony and having a lifestyle that is hedonistic (having intercourse with others).
 
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I'm actually an Odinist (not the white power kind) and it's like :c

In final battle there will be an all consuming darkness, snow and frost will cover the lands, wolves will howl and herald the clash of God and giant, and a really shitty neckbeard OC will be trollshielding
 
I'm actually an Odinist (not the white power kind) and it's like :c

In final battle there will be an all consuming darkness, snow and frost will cover the lands, wolves will howl and herald the clash of God and giant, and a really shitty neckbeard OC will be trollshielding
And as the OC trollshields, Niddhogir that knaws at the roots of Yggdrasil and Fefnir who slays Odin will come to get the terrible OC.
 
I assume he saw Odin's name, thought it was cool and alternative, and that's why.

Someone should probably tell him there are actually people truly believe in Valhöll and the eternal field of battles and are more than willing to kill and die to end up there :P
 
I feel sorry for the guy (I'm kinda an Anthos fan)... He doesn't understand that striptease dancers don't actually feel attracted to the bar patrons, it's their job to give them lapdances and stuff. They get paid to do this.

Why doesn't Anthos rather try to pick up nerd girls at a convention? They might actually admire his coat and hat and mechsona which are somewhat semi-awesome methinks.
 
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Because he's someone who thinks he's an autobot man, is a brony, and probably has a tiny lopsided penis

Hold up, did anyone look closely at the stripper post?

' My parents start more arguments than there are flies in a garbage dump...'

'But I digress...'

Someone get a researcher on this!
 
Why doesn't Anthos rather try to pick up nerd girls at a convention? They might actually admire his coat and hat and mechsona which are somewhat semi-awesome methinks.

You're kidding right? I mean the hat and coat I can kind of understand. But his persona? It's literally the definition of a Mary Sue. Only with more bitches and less sad backstory.
 
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So how would Anthos fare if by some bizarre turn of fate that stripper really married him and he raised her four kids?
 
So how would Anthos fare if by some bizarre turn of fate that stripper really married him and he raised her four kids?
No too well me thinks. For when he weds the stripper with four children, Anthos will only be over his head as he would deal with whatever problems there are in being a husband. Not to mention, he'd have to find a job if he wants to support his wife and children. (Especially if said wife wants to get out of the stripper business.)
 
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No too well me thinks. For when he weds the stripper with four children, Anthos will only be over his head as he would deal with whatever problems there are in being a husband. Not to mention, he'd have to find a job if he wants to support his wife and children. (Especially if said wife wants to get out of the stripper business.)
I imagine she keeps her job and Anthos becomes the househusband. There's something very househusband-y about him. He'd watch MLP with the kids, get them into Super Sentai and Transformers. When his wife comes home he'd hope for a lapdance, a round of cthulhu dice and hankypanky.

BTW I wonder if I brought this to our local strip club in town, how much would I have to pay the ladies to play a round with me??
 
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I feel sorry for the guy (I'm kinda an Anthos fan)... He doesn't understand that striptease dancers don't actually feel attracted to the bar patrons, it's their job to give them lapdances and stuff. They get paid to do this.

Why doesn't Anthos rather try to pick up nerd girls at a convention? They might actually admire his coat and hat and mechsona which are somewhat semi-awesome methinks.
Girls that go to these conventions cannot be that desperate... right?
 
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Jesus Christ. That's a whole lot crazier than most of the other things I've seen from him.
Friendship with benefits is magic >w>
Ew.
Primus on toast, this autobot is just looking to see some hot Taylor boobies and make new friends >w>.
Maybe he really does think he's Anthos.
Anthony Bapst said:
And sparks alive Vin... -_- do not call me Anthony, only the government gets to do that. I liken it to a slave name of sorts.
>Slave name
Okay then.
 
http://www.meetup.com/Bronies-MKE/members/32511012/ (link dead)

Anthos Oops... I mean, Anthony Bapst had an account on MeetUp.com and joined the Milwaukee MLP:FIM Fans group. As usual, still uses his Mary Sue persona. :roll:

Anthony Babst
Location:
Milwaukee, WI

Member since:
December 9, 2011



Introduction
How do bozos? Anthos the Crimson Impulse, Autobot Corsair and Trollbuster at your service >w>. I am a whovian, a brony, space pirate, autobot, and friend to people great and small. Yes, THIS autobot is happy to join your ranks... <w<

Who is your favorite mane cast pony, and (optionally) why?
Rarity >w>. I love that little fashionista!
 
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http://www.meetup.com/Bronies-MKE/members/32511012/ (link dead)

Anthos Oops... I mean, Anthony Bapst had an account on MeetUp.com and joined the Milwaukee MLP:FIM Fans group. As usual, still uses his Mary Sue persona. :roll:
Well, he does have an equestrian form for his OC. As for his love of Rarity, you can thank lobstershoulders for that (the guy who made some videos of Anthos, which Anthos replied to).
 
Anyone know from which scifi show his gun is??
Sonic_scattergun.jpg

The_Unknown_Autobot_Posing.png
 
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