Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[I am Jack's dead arm]

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He has to shake his head because Siri doesn't understand his mushmouth, even with monosyllabic simple words.

 

[a terminal posture]

This was lamer than I thought. He made... an Italian meat sauce with beans. He used pork powder for the meatballs to stay carnivore. He didn't bother to saute the vegetables even though he said that was the basic chili recipe. He used the fucking pressure cooker again. When he opened it up, there was a nice 1/2" layer of grease on top. Just awful. He emphasized that his pre-shredded parmigian cheese was aged for two years, two years sitting in your pantry pre-shredded doesn't count. At least put some cumin in to make it 'chili'.

 

[AnOminous]

And of course he has to call Crumbl Cookies "poison" when he was all for them earlier.

He was angy they didn't give him some immediately so he never wanted them anyway.

A literal fist-thumping baby. Only one, though, because the other arm is completely crippled because of his own stupidity.

 

[densedance]

What the fuck was that. He wasn't even bothered to use an Italian Wine. Or did he use that Snoop Dogg Wine for our Gucci Goombah?

 

[Falcon Sebben]

This was lamer than I thought. He made... an Italian meat sauce with beans. He used pork powder for the meatballs to stay carnivore. He didn't bother to saute the vegetables even though he said that was the basic chili recipe. He used the fucking pressure cooker again. When he opened it up, there was a nice 1/2" layer of grease on top. Just awful. He emphasized that his pre-shredded parmigian cheese was aged for two years, two years sitting in your pantry pre-shredded doesn't count. At least put some cumin in to make it 'chili'.

Well that as absolute shit.

Without a doubt the worst one so far.

And fuck you Fatty. Two year old shreddy cheese is not impressive. Real parmigiano reggiano is a thing of beauty. Parmesan cheese is kinda gross.

 

[Marc]

Once again, ol' reliable Jack shows himself to be a smug disgrace hated even by his own body. He is so confident in his chili-cooking expertise, despite never having learned how to make it over the course of probably fifty attempts. He can't pronounce basic ingredients ("this is a can of nelly beenz"), he can't follow his own steps, and he even adds an entire can of tomato paste because he believes it's a "thickener", despite doing everything possible to ensure his chilis are watery messes which never get the opportunity to boil off all the excess liquids he insists on adding to them for no reason, while compounding the problem by insisting on using a totally unnecessary pressure cooker because he believes it will give him a bowl of meetz NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW.

 

[LaughJoke2.0]

Jesus Christ just make a Pasta Fazool recipe.

 

[Helvítis Túristi]

This was lamer than I thought. He made... an Italian meat sauce with beans. He used pork powder for the meatballs to stay carnivore. He didn't bother to saute the vegetables even though he said that was the basic chili recipe. He used the fucking pressure cooker again. When he opened it up, there was a nice 1/2" layer of grease on top. Just awful. He emphasized that his pre-shredded parmigian cheese was aged for two years, two years sitting in your pantry pre-shredded doesn't count. At least put some cumin in to make it 'chili'.

There was no point in making meatballs. It's a chili. As other's have mentioned, he should have sautéed the vegetables first. Since jack supposedly doesn't drink, he should have dumped the whole bottle of wine in. If it was a good wine and he reduced it properly, it shouldn't be an issue. Really just a sloppy mess, but as jack stated. "There's a lot of meat, I wonder why? I love meat."

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Jesus Christ just make a Pasta Fazool recipe.

It probably taste a million times better than what he made.

If it was a good wine and he reduced it properly, it shouldn't be an issue.

The problem with that is the wine might be okay to drink, I'm really not familiar with that one he's using, but the flavor profile is going to change once you reduce it.

And then this faggot has used Yellow Tail wine on occasion which is just swill so I'm guessing it's not a good bottle he's using.

 

[Quixotic Man]

He adds no egg or other binder to the meatballs. No additional liquid at all. And he just kind of presses them together with his "good" hand.

This results in what can best be described as burnt dried meat clumps.

 

[CallmeCicada]

He adds no egg or other binder to the meatballs. No additional liquid at all. And he just kind of presses them together with his "good" hand.

This results in what can best be described as burnt dried meat clumps.

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It can work without adding a binder if you make them small (25~30 grams each). But he clearly fucked up.

 

[Comma]

This was lamer than I thought. He made... an Italian meat sauce with beans. He used pork powder for the meatballs to stay carnivore. He didn't bother to saute the vegetables even though he said that was the basic chili recipe. He used the fucking pressure cooker again. When he opened it up, there was a nice 1/2" layer of grease on top. Just awful. He emphasized that his pre-shredded parmigian cheese was aged for two years, two years sitting in your pantry pre-shredded doesn't count. At least put some cumin in to make it 'chili'.

Also, did he himself come up with that "I watched a Youtube"(???) phrase on his (GET YOU) APRON? Looks retarded as fuck.

 

[Tiresome]

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Also, did he himself come up with that "I watched a Youtube"(???) phrase on his (GET YOU) APRON? Looks retarded as fuck.

Crippled-brain asshole probably thinks that's an actual link on his apron, tried to poke it with his good hand and got enraged when the video didn't load.

 

[AltisticRight]

This might be more disgusting than his church chilli.

 

[REGENDarySumanai]

This might be more disgusting than his church chilli.

That's an incredibly high bar to clear, but out of all of his kitchen terrorism, you are probably correct. A man of Southern Italian descent can't cook Italian.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

That's an incredibly high bar to clear, but out of all of his kitchen terrorism, you are probably correct. A man of Southern Italian descent can't cook Italian.

He's Italian in name only. Fatty had a DNA test done thinking he'd get 100% Eyetalian and it showed he was more than 50% Arab. In other words he's more Sand Nigger than anything else.

 

[The Stranger]

He's Italian in name only. Fatty had a DNA test done thinking he'd get 100% Eyetalian and it showed he was more than 50% Arab. In other words he's more Sand Nigger than anything else.

Isn't that what the average Italian is?

 

[Doctor of Autism]

Says the guy who made up sponsorships to feel important



MrBeast and Pewdiepie would like a word (They were universally beloved at the peak of their success)



Jack on the Mike Tyson vs Jake Paul fight





Jack literally benefits from Government assistance

 

[lindsayfan]

i WaTcHed a YoUtUbE

these "chilis" are really jack distilling his food fetish down to its purest form. 30 lbs of 3 kinds of meat, a heap of seeznings and a few random cans, all dumped into a pressure cooker for near-instant gratification and garnished with a mountain of shreddy cheese.

 

[LordofCringe7206 Vol. 2]

MrBeast and Pewdiepie would like a word (They were universally beloved at the peak of their success)

This is a strange mix of coping and bitterness from Jack. It comes across as the opposite where he is trying to equate that the more well-liked somebody is the more successful they are, blaming people irrationally hating him for why his numbers on YouTube are shit.

Jack, the reason why your numbers are shit is because your content is shit. While part of it is due to the fact that people don't like you, the hatred people have for you has been more than justified with your behavior over the years and for how you responded to fans who offered mild critiques of your videos.