Ethan Ralph, Fugitive from Justice

[Don'tAnalizeMeBro!]

May should pull a powermove and declare Ralph legally dead. Is he capable of proving he's alive at this point since he's running out of documented proof he's Ethan Ralph? There's a non-zero percent she'd be successful.

And we do have someone who denied live on camera when asked that he was NOT this “Ethan Ralph”.

 

[Terrorist]

Could you imagine the piggy being transported in a prisoner plane, like con air.

Corn Air

 

[Die For Me!]

Ralph (certified oldfag) had a Saturday night show where he apparently had a call to arms to have the kino casino arrested

Ralph is getting very old and forgetful these days, which is why it is up to the Karen Farms to remind Ethan that he currently has a nation wide warrant for his arrest with no expiration, and what better way to drive it into a supposed old fags skull then with epic maymays?
This is Sheriff Steve Soyka of Stearns County Minnesota, he is currently the head of the ongoing nation wide hog hunt.

This is f-f-f-female cop Mary Fease-I mean uh, Lieser, she is also on patrol looking to arrest heeeem

Finally Sean "Big Guy" Haney, he's the Lieutenant of the jail, which means he's the chief of the sufferin'

Here's a few faces from Ralph's two biggest shows this year (which only happen to be pillstreams btw)

I also recommend using ancient meme archives like Macrochan in order to really dive into Ethan's /b/tard mind so he can internalize the anxiety-inducing situation he is in.

Lastly, do not shy away from using Aaron Imholte in your kahntent as well, since it was Ralphs Rekieta-induced hate boner for the toe that got him in this mess in the first place

 

[Rage Pig]

Lmao

 

[Look--an Alien!]

Lmao
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ah'm dumb as hell yor honah and I got cats and mah food mountain only lasts for three weeks so Shirley you can see the uniqueness of mah situation

 

[Heavy Rainfall2]

Lmao
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Gunt broken. He must actually be scared now.

 

[Vibralldo]

Lmao
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Look at that sentence structure. He considers himself a writer but has the linguistic skills of a middle schooler.

 

[Rage Pig]

Ending that sentence with a fucking etc. is the best part, a true wordsmith, his book will be amazing.

 

[Quote Cursor]

Lmao
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It reads like a sad pity charity ad.

Just by faxing that number, ya honar, you can sponsor a gunt today.

 

[Tiger Jack]

Lmao
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"Dear Diary Judge, I know I made a mockery of your courtroom and failed to respect your authority, but you gotta understand I have keeds! So could you pretty pretty please show me special treatment?" - Ethan Oliver Ralph, of the Illustrious Killstream

Lol, and in addition, lmao.

 

[Die For Me!]

My name is not Ethan Ralph. Ah have the pretty & precocious sheriff Steve Soyka a-logging me. Ah cannot visit mah e-daddeh Dax or ah will get arrested. Ah have cats and ah dont know what the fuck tew dew. Please let me have yew on mah show via Zoom for this body-only warrant. btw I have ah West Memphis fax numbah cuz ahm ah real three 6 mafia niggah.
Sincerely,

My Name's Not Ethan Ralph

 

[Necrosan]

Lmao
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"Deer Jdge, I know u are trying to arrest me but plz give me accomodations so I don't get arrested, etc.

-Criminal."

 

[Mr. Manchester]

Lmao
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Hahahaha, I love Ralph sometimes. Goofy bastard.

 

[Obnoxious Asshole]

Lmao
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The Court:
"LOL no. LMAO.
SUFFAH RALPH!"

 

[Bowl of Ramen]

It reads like a sad pity charity ad.

Just by faxing that number, ya honar, you can sponsor a gunt today.

Anthem for this thread.

 

[LiquidChrisRespecter]

Gunty begging the judge for a Pretty-Please-With-A-Cherry-On-Top permission slip to come back to America if he "submits to whatever punishment etc." by giving multiple fax numbers was not on my bingo card.

 

[Cyberpunk Meta]

Poor Piggertits. Imagine thinking this’ll do anything to solve your legal issues. Maybe don’t act like a rage pig and think before you speak Guntflaps.

 

[Noproblemo]

This arc will conclude with Ralph hiring Coyotes to sneak him across the border. He'll get to visit Xander for Christmas, but he just walks a bit funny.

 

[░░░▓▓▓▓▓▓ด้้้้้็็็็็้้]

Who knew that arrest warrants were meant to inconvenience people?

Well, couldn't be me!

 

[30+GameOvers]

Lmao
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There is a prison cell in Minnesota being readied for his arrival, and with any luck he will spend Christmas and New Years in there.