Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[EatBeforeYouEat]

Don't know if this has been discussed yet but the new bitmojis make Jagoff look like John Fetterman. Very fitting imo

 

[Marc]

That’s about the only positive I can say about that pizza. It would still not taste good, but at least you won’t risk getting salmonella.

If Jack handled it, you would only be trading salmonella for escherichia coli. I also have an irrational fear that eating his food would somehow immediately cause me to be retarded in a wheelchair and make drowning sasquatch noises.

 

[Stan]

Lol Jacks' death pool appears to have underestimated his ability to survive 2024, although 'somewhere in 2025 or 2026' gang still have a chance.

 

[Doctor of Autism]

The only way for Jack to make a good Steak is to use AI, and it still is trash

 

[semitooth]

Don't know if this has been discussed yet but the new bitmojis make Jagoff look like John Fetterman. Very fitting imo


View attachment 6749451

I will never get over how ridiculously stupid these look..

 

[Marc]

Emoji Jack is gradually transforming into Dibilitas from Haunting Ground:

 

[The Stranger]

Lol Jacks' death pool appears to have underestimated his ability to survive 2024, although 'somewhere in 2025 or 2026' gang still have a chance.

Don't count me out yet, we still got 2 weeks

 

[Stan]

The only way for Jack to make a good Steak is to use AI, and it still is trash

View attachment 6749717

That steak on the left looks so wrong. And it looks like it's topped with a sprig off a fir tree.

 

[lindsayfan]

Lol Jacks' death pool appears to have underestimated his ability to survive 2024, although 'somewhere in 2025 or 2026' gang still have a chance.

i bet on december and i'm sticking with it. he sounds and looks worse in that pizza oven video than he ever has. the polymarket "when will jack die" odds might favor early january/feb but my faith is strong.

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

Lol Jacks' death pool appears to have underestimated his ability to survive 2024, although 'somewhere in 2025 or 2026' gang still have a chance.

I'll be honest, I thought carnivore would seal the deal before EOY. Would prefer at least one more stroke before he goes to the great Vevor pizza oven below.

 

[Gulls on Film]

The only way for Jack to make a good Steak is to use AI, and it still is trash

View attachment 6749717

He really does spend half his day yelling STEK at various AI programs.

 

[lindsayfan]

He really does spend half his day yelling STEK at various AI programs.

yeah but because he's so stroked out he has to repeat it dozens of times before alexa or siri or whatever dystopian WEF ai voice assistant he uses can understand what he's requesting.

"naighh cubbr wid sneg tosssh"

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Jack just randomly picks and chooses when he wants to show off his carniwhore cred. He will eat pizza this week but like 2-3 weeks ago he decided to remove the bun and eat just the raw elk patties to show how much of a devout carniwhore he is.

Also Jack's life is so sad he pretty much stalks the Fedex/UPS guys.

View attachment 6749107

This faggot is on a scooty-puff and he can't drive a couple extra feet to get his package?

There's lazy and then there's Scalfatty lazy.

 

[Marc]

He really does spend half his day yelling STEK at various AI programs.

He's using AI prompts to generate fetish porn the way 4chan pedophiles do.

This faggot is on a scooty-puff and he can't drive a couple extra feet to get his package?

Where the courier left it requires Jack to fit through the front door of his house, MOM.

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

Where the courier left it requires Jack to fit through the front door of his house, MOM.

Or risk driving off the massive cliff that marks the end of the porch and be stuck there for hours until Tammy gets home.

 

[I am Jack's dead arm]

Can his scooter even fit through the front door? He's whined before that it takes him several minutes to get to the door to let the dogs in/out.

 

[biggacracka]

He's whined before that it takes him several minutes to get to the door to let the dogs in/out.

Imagine bitching that the mcmansion you had build has a shitty layout.
YOU ORDERED IT THIS WAY YOU STUPID FUCKING BASTARD!
Yes I am MATI. It's the equivalent of going to a restaurant, asking for your food to be burnt and bitching because the chef burned your food. NO SHIT, THAT'S HOW YOU ORDERED IT YOU FAT SLIMEBALL

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Can his scooter even fit through the front door? He's whined before that it takes him several minutes to get to the door to let the dogs in/out.

Normal people would look at that and say, "I need to fix this problem" and take active steps to reduce their dependence on such a thing.

Fatty's solution? "We need a bigger door or maybe a way I can open it remotely without having to stop watching Blue's Clues".

Imagine bitching that the mcmansion you had build has a shitty layout.
YOU ORDERED IT THIS WAY YOU STUPID FUCKING BASTARD!

But how was HE supposed to know that the delivery guy wouldn't come to the door, drop it off inside and help Fatty to the bathroom to clean up the boom boom he made in his pants?

 

[densedance]

Nothing to miss really. Alltough he said he nearly went to Urgent Care at his Disneyland Visit due to the worsening condition. Alltough, who fucking knows? I think he's bluffing to come off as a stronk man.

 

[Hamstirer]

That steak on the left looks so wrong. And it looks like it's topped with a sprig off a fir tree.

Well steven jobs tried to cure his cancer with apples, I'm not all the surprises his AI doesn't know what steak is.