Nintendo Switch (Currently Plagued) - Here we shit post about the new Nintendo console, The Switch

lol this is a joke right

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lol this is a joke right

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This is going to be another WiiU branding fuckup isn't it?
"More of the same" is hardly a risk when it refers to basic format homogeneity, especially when said format was already the incumbent generation's core selling point and a proven money printer. The Wii U was a bad system because people were confused by what it was, the GamePad gimmick was underutilized, and the support was abysmal by Nintendo standards (and a lot of what they did support it with was bad). Switch's hybrid nature and flexibility, on the other hand, remains unparalleled. Portable gaming beyond Nintendo is still split among streaming 4G-mauling resolution videos, tinkering with Windows for eyewatering prices and paying somewhat more manageable prices to tinker with Linux instead; dock stations are still an afterthought; single screen local multiplayer out the box is still a rarity even despite all the sports games, fighters and racers you'd expect to maintain the demand for it. At this point, Nintendo could frankly just make the successor a literal "Switch Pro" in all but name and move PS4 tier numbers by merely mopping up whatever PS4 multiplats its older sibling still won't have had by then. Seriously, all Nintendo has to do is say two magic words: Elden Ring. Boom. Instant money machine.

Of course, this state of things simultaneously explains Nintendo's lack of communication around the transition. Switch itself is a winning formula that has an enormous library that has been confirmed to be backwards-compatible at that. So when the same crowd that used to derisively call Switch "a $300 Zelda machine" in its first months can now be seen vocally thirsting to wish-list several dozens of next gen games over the the hundreds of current gen ones... yeah, "consooming next product" is the only diagnosis to suspect here.
 
"More of the same" is hardly a risk when it refers to basic format homogeneity
This isn't "basic format homogeneity", this is "literally the same exact console from 7 years ago with better specs and ONE new button". How the fuck are you going to convince anyone to buy the new console, let alone be able to tell the difference, when it looks nearly identical to an OLED and incredibly similar to the base model?

If you can't see a problem with the new successor console (that's been whispered about for 3+ years and purposely delayed to give the Switch more time in the sun) looking identical to the console whose lifespan was intentionally elongated to delay it, then 1) you're retarded and 2) I pity you.

The average normie is going to look at this and be just as confused as with the Wii U. They will not be able to tell the difference between the Switch, the Switch OLED, and the Switch 2. If you tell them that the new console looks identical to the old one but is more expensive and can supposedly play "better" games, a sizeable portion of the population is going to question what the point in buying it will be and another sizeable portion will be clueless enough to protest the fact that they can't play new games on their old console despite it looking identical.

It'll be like the Wii U, but the problem won't be being confused by what looks like an add-on. It'll be being confused by what looks like the same fucking console. If Nintendo don't completely change the way their boxes and cartridges look for the new system, I can see people being perpetually confused and disappointed that the new game you got for little Timmy's birthday doesn't work on his gaming thingamajig and now you have to do the song and dance of calming him down, returning the game to the store, and either leaving him with a nonfunctional holiday gift or finding him some old game that works on his box that he hasn't played yet.

This will probably be fine for the hardcores (assuming it's shiny and new enough for them not to pitch a fit about it not being very different) given that they understand specs and are too retardedly loyal to Nintendo to question consuming their next console, but the average normie-- overwhelmingly the Switch's main consumerbase-- will not be able to understand this as an upgrade and will likely see little reason to buy this. Especially during the economic downturn we're going through right now where entertainment spending is down.

Switch itself is a winning formula that has an enormous library
Therefore, why would anyone bother getting the next new box when 1) it is more expensive, 2) it looks the same, 3) it seems to be even less portable than the original (due to its larger size), and 4) assuming that the box template and cartridges don't look too different, your average person will probably think "These new games look like they can go in my old machine, so why buy the new one?"

I'm hoping that the video is actually complete bullshit, as are the leaks and screenshots, no matter how stupid that may be because if this seriously is the Switch 2 then it will drive away almost all of the Switch's previous users. Best case scenario there's a mass trade-in phenomenon where people just sell their old Switch and buy the new one and people move on, but I don't think enough people will be able to tell the difference for that to happen and I truly do not think it will happen if the 2 comes out at a higher price point.

Also i'm salty that there's no second screen. Mainly just that. Even though I knew it was too good to be true I want it to happen and therefore, since it might not have, I shall tard-rage.

No, but really, this seems like an incredibly stupid move and I hope it's not what ends up happening. I still remember what it was like back when the OLED released. This might just be an even louder repeat of that.
 
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The Wii U did poorly because 90% of the audience of the Wii evaporated when mobile gaming came along. Literally everything else did not matter.

GenX retards would hand their kids their "old iphone" and tell them to download free games on the app store instead of buying consoles. Old people got addicted to Candy Crush.

It took years of Nintendo rebuilding an audience of real gamers again and less retarded parents to come along to buy hardware for their kids again.
 
Just the Switch again" is the best thing they could have done and I'm glad they did it. Now don't do dual releases and sell the system on games.
 

Is Nintendo going the Sony route now and banning games that have risque content? Actually, it seems Sony allowed these games, so I don't know whats going on.

It can be better but it can be worse too. The cheerleader rivals are a downgrade though.
I agree, it can be worse, but it wasn't in this case. You couldn't pay me to care what Team Plasma is doing. At least Team Rocket is what it is, plays its role adequately. At least the adventure itself being the meat of the story is better than some text dump slop I'd rather skip.

It's way more interesting to me to read some short journal diaries alluding to Mew and Mewtwo, get my imagination going a bit, than to have to endure repeated droning mythologies and worship about Tapu Koko who protects not-Hawaii. It's better to hear a short little tale about Celebi being a forest guardian, then get back to my adventure.

At least we agree about the cheerleader rivals.

It is true that there were some great designs but I hold little love for the starters personally. It is very subjective. Do not pretend that the designs were banger after banger.
The only starter that was merely decent was Chikorita, Totodile is a certified classic starter. Cyndaquil is good, not gen 1 good, but still shits on everything after. Gen 3 immediately shit the bes in this regard (though still had some good Pokemon, just not starters; Torchick looked good but had a disgusting, weird freak final form, and the others are lucky to even be on Chikorita's level, if that).

If it walks, talks and looks like a Genwunner... You can praise the hell out of a Ford model T for what it achieved but do not act like it is the best car ever.
Pinto might be newer but ain't better.
 
I don't like Nintendo much but holy shit lmao players will never be pleased. You would have bitched regardless about their next console for either being the same or too different. I do wish they made a 3DS successor though or continued them. I wouldn't mind a smaller switch/handheld that can fit in cargo shorts. I like that its the switch again since it has a good catalogue of vidya by now, and maybe I can wait and see if its worth getting.
 
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It'll be like the Wii U, but the problem won't be being confused by what looks like an add-on. It'll be being confused by what looks like the same fucking console.
I was going to rebut with "but what about the millions of people who upgrade to the new iPhone every year despite it being practically identical to the previous model", but the more I thought about Nintendo going down the Apple route, the more it depressed me, so I concede the point.
I don't like Nintendo much but holy shit lmao players will never be pleased. You would have bitched regardless about their next console for either being the same or too different. I
^this is also true.
 
This isn't "basic format homogeneity", this is "literally the same exact console from 7 years ago with better specs and ONE new button".
Isn't that what PS4 was, like, LITERALLY? I think it'd be a mistake for Nintendo not to change the appearance a bit more because cosmetics do matter to a degree, but let's not pretend that's not pretty much industry standard now. Wii U was probably the last unique system we can expect for a while.

Also, just because it looks the same doesn't mean it doesn't have some kind of new features we're unaware of, I can't see Nintendo not including some kind of minor gimmick.

the average normie-- overwhelmingly the Switch's main consumerbase-- will not be able to understand this as an upgrade and will likely see little reason to buy this.
Games sell systems, always have. I actually think you're partially right, this could hinder Switch 2, but if they advertise appropriately and drill it into everyone's heads, "Hey, this new Mario? IT'S ONLY FOR SWITCH 2. 2. FUCKING T-W-O, YOU STUPID NIGGERS!!!!" then it should be fine. They just need a great launch library, pricing, marketing, etc. If they throw it out to die, hoping it sells itself coasting on Switch 1, it's gonna be a problem.

I was going to rebut with "but what about the millions of people who upgrade to the new iPhone every year despite it being practically identical to the previous model", but the more I thought about Nintendo going down the Apple route, the more it depressed me, so I concede the point.
I'm not sure gamers are really on board with that anyway. One mid-gen refresh, sure (well, maybe--I doubt PS5 Pro is selling like hotcakes), but regularly upgrading is a ways off still imo. I do think we'll get there though.
 
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Is Nintendo going the Sony route now and banning games that have risque content? Actually, it seems Sony allowed these games, so I don't know whats going on.
Either Neptunia did something that even the relatively lax modern Nintendo was not fine with or Nintendo Woke Infection spread. Best start accelerating woke death.

I agree, it can be worse, but it wasn't in this case. You couldn't pay me to care what Team Plasma is doing. At least Team Rocket is what it is, plays its role adequately. At least the adventure itself being the meat of the story is better than some text dump slop I'd rather skip.
What evil teams in Pokemon are is Bond Villains. Different flavours of Bond Villains. All of them played that role adequately (apart from Flare). There was nothing that they lacked that Rocket had.

It's way more interesting to me to read some short journal diaries alluding to Mew and Mewtwo, get my imagination going a bit, than to have to endure repeated droning mythologies and worship about Tapu Koko who protects not-Hawaii. It's better to hear a short little tale about Celebi being a forest guardian, then get back to my adventure.
That still existed in most games.

The only starter that was merely decent was Chikorita, Totodile is a certified classic starter. Cyndaquil is good, not gen 1 good, but still shits on everything after. Gen 3 immediately shit the bes in this regard (though still had some good Pokemon, just not starters; Torchick looked good but had a disgusting, weird freak final form, and the others are lucky to even be on Chikorita's level, if that).
Nah, I disagree. Meganium: It looks too bland for something so flower themed. Typhlosion: It has too tiny arms for my liking. Makes it look awkward. Feraligatr: Maybe it would have benefited from not being bipedal? Crocodilians on two legs look very weird. As for the Gen 3 starters, I like them but I do not think of them perfect either. Sceptile blades look weirder than its pre-evolution, Blaziken should have the crown of a rooster since that looks like a fire and it would fit and Swampert could use a tail to balance out the design. Overall, I prefer the Gen 3 starters but both are far from perfect.

Pinto might be newer but ain't better.
They made better cars since then.
 
Isn't that what PS4 was, like, LITERALLY?
No. A fucking Google search would have solved this for you in two seconds.
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Not a single one of the PS3's models looks even remotely as similar to the PS4 as the Switch 2 does to the Switch 1. Some of them might look a little similar, sure, but the differences are obvious and unavoidable within 5 seconds of looking at them. They even have different silhouettes.

This "Switch 2" is literally just the Switch 1 but with an extra button and an inch or two more screen size.
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Good luck getting grandma to tell the difference.

just because it looks the same doesn't mean it doesn't have some kind of new features we're unaware of
This does not matter if the systems look almost exactly the same. Any new features will be drowned out by tard rage. Trust me dude, I know it'll be different due to specs and it might even have a couple of new features to its name that make it worth buying, but the average consumer will not know enough to discern these features from the console's design and they will be too lazy to do the proper research to find out.

Games sell systems, always have.
Hence why I made such an enormous deal out of the packaging of them. If the Switch 2 has a similar method of playing games to the Switch 1, you will see mountains of clueless parents buying Switch 2 games for their childrens' Switch 1s and throwing a fit when they don't work.

We should also take into account the $70 price hike Nintendo's been hinting at that started with Tears of the Kingdom. If you:
  • release a new system that looks identical to the old one
  • make the games for it more expensive
  • do not change the packaging or cartridge significantly enough to indicate that it is a new system
  • and sell it alongside the old system
then you cannot expect people to shell out more money for a very similar product during a time when people are having trouble affording groceries, let alone big shiny new entertainment boxes. People still confused Wii U games for Wii despite the big fuckoff banner on the top screaming the opposite. If Nintendo doesn't cover half the damn box of the Switch 2 games with "THIS IS FOR THE SWITCH 2" and/or change the cartridge shape significantly (eg GBA carts to DS carts) then parents will not be able to tell the difference.

if they advertise appropriately and drill it into everyone's heads, "Hey, this new Mario? IT'S ONLY FOR SWITCH 2. 2. FUCKING T-W-O, YOU STUPID NIGGERS!!!!" then it should be fine.
Optimistic, I hope this happens. I don't know how much it'll work given how insanely personalized most advertising has become nowadays. Even parents aren't really watching cable TV anymore, so I doubt that'll help Nintendo nearly as much as it did in ye olden days. This is also assuming that the Switch 2 ads don't suck massive donkey balls like the Wii U ones did, so...

They just need a great launch library, pricing, marketing, etc. If they throw it out to die, hoping it sells itself coasting on Switch 1, it's gonna be a problem.
Given that one of the main features they've been boasting about for years now is backwards compatibility, I have a hunch that they might end up doing that.

I truly don't trust in the launch library being great. From what I know, the only titles that might happen for launch are a new Pokémon generation (which sounds killer until you remember the last two generations' atrocious press and how sales have barely grown between generations 8 & 9, so if the trend keeps up then 10 might not do any better) and Metroid Prime 4.

The latter is great for hardcores and will no doubt get them hooked, while the former is decent for normies (but for how long?), though there is 0 guarantee that either will be quality and neither have been system-sellers historically. (Pokémon has sold handheld consoles near-exclusively. Since heading to the Switch it hasn't even managed top 5.)

Can't say more about the games because this is by far the biggest question mark of whole thing.

I'm not sure gamers are really on board with that anyway. One mid-gen refresh, sure (well, maybe--I doubt PS5 Pro is selling like hotcakes), but regularly upgrading is a ways off still imo. I do think we'll get there though.
Eugh, I hope not. That's a dystopian future for entertainment if ever I've heard of one. Great for the companies, I'm sure, but that'd be hell for the average consumer. Then again, what in the modern AAA industry isn't. *sigh*

^this is also true.
See, I'm a weirdo faggot who'd probably complain way more if they just stuck to what they'd already been doing (see: the multiple paragraphs I have written on this page doing just that), so I have to disagree because I would have been personally thrilled if they'd gone a completely weirdo different route (that worked/had backwards compatibility) or remixed an old idea with a new one to make something new.

Instead they are doing literally the exact same thing and expecting us to upgrade. Genuinely could not have come up with a worse scenario if I'd tried (except for maybe this identical console somehow not being backwards-compatible) and I dread to think what this shit will do to the already-tenuous state of the AAA industry.

Xbox and Playstation are already fumbling the ball really hard. What happens if the final pillar crumbles?

We all get better games on one platform, that's what. But it'd probably really hurt the economy, so I doubt it'll be so nice.
 
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