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Local Faggot Fuentes is attempting to regain public sympathies after using chemical weapon on 50 year old woman who knocked on his door, officials say.
The District Attorney was quoted, "Why did he open his door? Does he not know the first rule of self defense?".
To this date, there remains no convincing evidence that reposting public information on Twitter should be a crime, legal scholars say.
Local Operator was quoted, "Nicholas has a publicly registered political action committee and you can look up his address through that. Please stop asking me questions, I'm moving back to America."