Jaron Seth Bloshinsky / Jazz Jennings / I Am Jazz - Puberty Blockers: Not Even Once

[Uzumaki]

I feel so much secondhand embarrassment for the Jennings. You can really sense the exasperating nonsense going on behind the scenes. Trying to have dinner and your failson with permanent crying face is filming you eat for an audience of no one so he can pretend he has a job.

How can you be JAZZ FUCKING JENNINGS brother and still be the failure sibling? Sander shouldn’t be physically possible.

 

[Iron Jaguar]

OK so I'm giving away that I'm super old, but Griffen is a doppleganger for the Down Syndrome kid named Corky from an old TV show called Life Goes On.
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Sadly, none of the women or "women" in the Bloshinksy family have that Cute Nerd aesthetic that Kellie Martin did back in the day.

More for you Griffin fans.
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Sander likes the holidays because his siblings are obligated to be around him. He has NO friends, so any social situation where others are essentially trapped is perfect for him.

@Uzumaki
How can you be JAZZ FUCKING JENNINGS brother and still be the failure sibling? Sander shouldn’t be physically possible.

Sanders is the personification of the Lament Configuration.

 

[Uzumaki]

Sanders is the personification of the Lament Configuration.

In an attic somewhere there’s a painting of Sanders that just keeps getting more and more dignified.

 

[Iron Jaguar]

In an attic somewhere there’s a painting of Sanders that just keeps getting more and more dignified.

I love it. - The painting made the deal with the Devil.

 

[Iron Jaguar]

^ Looks like we have a couple of new trannies invading the site. Hey, faggots, YWNBAW.

 

[Fapcop]

The more time goes by, the more its obvious that Sanders is the real lolcow of the family.

Jazz is just some dude with mental isssues who had his dick chopped.

More for you Griffin fans.
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lol!

How many product placements is that in a 30 second video? Two, one for the restaurant and one for “my wine club”.

I’ll fucking bet you that this faggot asked them out, “my treat!” and all… And then Jewed out, and proceeded to spend an afternoon calling managers and restaurants, promising them “exposure” for a free meal.

“The Jennings? You know from ‘My name is Jazz’? No sir, not the music Jazz… It’s a name! My sister is transsexual.. Hello?…. No, Jazz is my sister, this is Sander! I have a TikTok account! And a wine club!”

If you value your ears, mute your speakers before pressing "play".
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Why gee, I bet you everyone in the Jennings family just looooves when Sander finds yet another cringe and dated TikTok thing to do together, so he can get a “boost” and some likes.

I’ll further bet you that Sander spends a whole weekend on trying to lasso them all together. Calling in ancient favors, begging, guilt tripping, making promises, having mom intervene.

Like herding cats, except for cats it’s all retards, and they’re all sick and tired of Sander and his gay online attention whoring.

WTF IS GOING ON?!?

They look like a whole generation of Jennings got hit with a retard stick.

Nevermind Jazz and Sander here, wasn’t Griff supposed to be the smart one? He looks like that fat kid from the neighborhood, who always ends up at the ER because he eats coins.


Fucking wild! Just look at that face, it’s like an ad for a chromosome screening/abortion service.


“Recent studies show that your average Florida 6 woman has a lifetime risk of 40%, of inadvertently shacking up with a mentally disabled Jew. Early warning signs include: Retard face, an inability to take off winter headgear at the dinner table, mouth that smile while the eyes are crying…”

 

[Iron Jaguar]

WTF IS GOING ON?!?


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Fucking wild! Just look at that face, it’s like an ad for a chromosome screening/abortion service.

Thank you for that immortal phrase. I will be using it.

 

[AssignedEva]

I feel so much secondhand embarrassment for the Jennings. You can really sense the exasperating nonsense going on behind the scenes. Trying to have dinner and your failson with permanent crying face is filming you eat for an audience of no one so he can pretend he has a job.

How can you be JAZZ FUCKING JENNINGS brother and still be the failure sibling? Sander shouldn’t be physically possible.

It's a Matryoshka of cringe;

• This is structured like a partnership post (shouting out the "new brunch & bubbles menu", tagging them with "Thanks @chwinery for hosting us! ") but it's not actually tagged as a paid partnership anywhere or shared by the restaurant, so Sander is clearly just trying to make it look like a paid partnership
• I could tell from the get-go that this was clearly a chain restaurant in line with Miller & Carter, and sure enough it's a "Napa inspired casual upscale dining experience" with something like 100 locations. Nothing wrong with that, but it's been presented like they're in Akoko rather than an upscale Applebees
• Sander's "exclusive wineclub membership" is $20 a month
• This is very clearly Jeanette's idea of fancy that Sander has internalised
• Jeanette and Greg (and the gf) are there while Ari is absent, so why is this a sibling post? Sander couldn't think of another way to try and make "content" I guess

The more you look, the worse it gets.

 

[Godmode]

Sander's "exclusive wineclub membership" is $20 a month

Who the fuck thinks this retard has any knowledge of wine? Who the fuck thinks this hairy shirtless faggot has any taste in anything at all? Pander's wine "recommendations" will probably be shit tier wineries that pay him to recommend their swill. He might also milk a few shekels in subs from queers that want to ass rape him I guess. In any case, you are right that this is a Jeanette idea, not Pander's.

 

[AssignedEva]

Who the fuck thinks this retard has any knowledge of wine? Who the fuck thinks this hairy shirtless faggot has any taste in anything at all? Pander's wine "recommendations" will probably be shit tier wineries that pay him to recommend their swill. He might also milk a few shekels in subs from queers that want to ass rape him I guess. In any case, you are right that this is a Jeanette idea, not Pander's.

It's simpler than that. The "exclusive wine club" means Coopers Hawk provides "exclusive" wines every month. For example on their tasting menu ($12 per person)

"Vin Noir" is a "wine club exclusive". That means if you're part of the "exclusive wine club" you can buy a bottle for $22.99, but if you're not part of the "exclusive club" then you have to wait until February if you want to buy a bottle, and it costs extra!
Sander's not even saying he knows about wine. He's falling for the marketing and trying to flex it like he's got access to the downstairs of Le Beaujolais invitation only private member's club so doesn't have to dine on the ground floor with the plebs... but really he's just wasting $20 to order whatever grape blend the chain has slung together this month (I'm sure it's quite nice, really). If you dined there regularly and particularly liked learning about wine, it might have a benefit but Sander's beginning and end is just cargo cult "success".

 

[Fapcop]

The more you look, the worse it gets.

That phrase basically sums up Sander very well.

His twin brother got his lawyer deal going for him. His sister is a psychologist. Shit, even poor Jazz has a life outside of being “Jazz from TV”, even if that life consists of either sitting and eating crap in his room or purging.

Sander is the only one who got fucked over so bad by being on TV, that his entire existence is built around holding on to that tiny bit of second hand fame.

I’ll guarantee you that the rest of his life will be spent reminding people that Jazz is his “sister” and he’s a sooper happy guy who used to be on a Reality show.

“Hey guys! Today is the big THREE O! Come join me as me, Jazz and the rest of the Jennings celebrate!”

“Today is the TWENTY YEAR anniversary of ‘My Name is Jazz!” Join me, Jazz and the rest of the Jennings on a trip down memory lane!”

“A year ago today, my sister Jazz killed herself. I miss her every day, please join us Jennings on this memorial stream and celebrate her life!”

“I miss Jazz SOO MUCH! One thing that helped me tremendously was counseling. Please join my Grief Club, where we help each other deal with loss. It’s only ten dollars a month, and new members gets first heads-up on official Jazz and Jennings merch!”

 

[Brickley]

It's incredible how childish and mentally stunted Planter is when he's not even the son who took puberty blockers.

He chose to leave in this clip with a long strand of cheese dangling from his mouth. "Oops! Haha! You caught me at an awkward moment!"

"It's okay, I'm SANDER!!! I'm going to quirkily and charmingly and ~authentically~ lap it up back into my mouth as I make eye contact with the camera!"
He has to have even more of a Peter Pan complex than Jazz. Being a messy eater stopped being cute when you hit 2 at the very most. He tries so hard not to feel shame that he passes it on to anyone who has to bear witness to any of his gross-out videos.
And to everyone else in his life, too. His poor handler is seen humbly wiping the corner of her mouth as she eats, which I'm sure is more of a courteous, polite gesture than actually cleaning anything. Plantar doesn't understand that.

 

[Iron Jaguar]

That phrase basically sums up Sander very well.

His twin brother got his lawyer deal going for him. His sister is a psychologist. Shit, even poor Jazz has a life outside of being “Jazz from TV”, even if that life consists of either sitting and eating crap in his room or purging.

Sander is the only one who got fucked over so bad by being on TV, that his entire existence is built around holding on to that tiny bit of second hand fame.

I’ll guarantee you that the rest of his life will be spent reminding people that Jazz is his “sister” and he’s a sooper happy guy who used to be on a Reality show.

“Hey guys! Today is the big THREE O! Come join me as me, Jazz and the rest of the Jennings celebrate!”

“Today is the TWENTY YEAR anniversary of ‘My Name is Jazz!” Join me, Jazz and the rest of the Jennings on a trip down memory lane!”

“A year ago today, my sister Jazz killed herself. I miss her every day, please join us Jennings on this memorial stream and celebrate her life!”

“I miss Jazz SOO MUCH! One thing that helped me tremendously was counseling. Please join my Grief Club, where we help each other deal with loss. It’s only ten dollars a month, and new members gets first heads-up on official Jazz and Jennings merch!”

"Today is five years since our father committed murder-suicide. He left no explanation for his actions. Join us in a celebration of the life of Jeanette, the World's Greatest Mommy."

 

[Tasty Tatty]

That phrase basically sums up Sander very well.

His twin brother got his lawyer deal going for him. His sister is a psychologist. Shit, even poor Jazz has a life outside of being “Jazz from TV”, even if that life consists of either sitting and eating crap in his room or purging.

Sander is the only one who got fucked over so bad by being on TV, that his entire existence is built around holding on to that tiny bit of second hand fame.

I’ll guarantee you that the rest of his life will be spent reminding people that Jazz is his “sister” and he’s a sooper happy guy who used to be on a Reality show.

“Hey guys! Today is the big THREE O! Come join me as me, Jazz and the rest of the Jennings celebrate!”

“Today is the TWENTY YEAR anniversary of ‘My Name is Jazz!” Join me, Jazz and the rest of the Jennings on a trip down memory lane!”

“A year ago today, my sister Jazz killed herself. I miss her every day, please join us Jennings on this memorial stream and celebrate her life!”

“I miss Jazz SOO MUCH! One thing that helped me tremendously was counseling. Please join my Grief Club, where we help each other deal with loss. It’s only ten dollars a month, and new members gets first heads-up on official Jazz and Jennings merch!”

It's like the Vonn Traps from hell.

 

[Fapcop]

"Today is five years since our father committed murder-suicide. He left no explanation for his actions. Join us in a celebration of the life of Jeanette, the World's Greatest Mommy."

I’m convinced that the dad has like a separate family that nobody knows about.

Maybe a Mexican maid from the law office that he knocked up 2-3 times?

3-4 days a week he goes there, enjoys being the father of the house, no talk about hormones, and some kids that aren’t cringe failsons.

Would also explain why we see so little of him in the show.

 

[Iron Jaguar]

I’m convinced that the dad has like a separate family that nobody knows about.

Maybe a Mexican maid from the law office that he knocked up 2-3 times?

3-4 days a week he goes there, enjoys being the father of the house, no talk about hormones, and some kids that aren’t cringe failsons.

Would also explain why we see so little of him in the show.

Either that or he's heading off to the bath houses late at night.

 

[Peaches Demure]

"Today is five years since our father committed murder-suicide. He left no explanation for his actions. Join us in a celebration of the life of Jeanette, the World's Greatest Mommy."

Nahh, Greg is pushing 60. He's not gonna snap. He's going to keep that shit-eating grin on his (now bearded) face and pretend he's totally fine with the trajectory of his life. I wouldn't discount the hypothesis of extramarital affairs, however. He's agreeable to a fault and that might be his only way to blow off some steam, because he's held off confronting Jeannette for over 30 years.

 

[Uzumaki]

I’m convinced that the dad has like a separate family that nobody knows about.

I love when a situation is so bizarre you can just throw out stuff like this and it genuinely would answer more questions than it would raise.

 

[Flamin Park]

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Why do Gander's videos always cut off unexpectedly?

I always hope it's because some passerby has snapped and caved his head in with a large rock and I always disappointed

 

[Flamin Park]

I feel like I'm repeating myself, but this is unironically better than Snider's usual "positivity" crap.

Yes but to be fair, so is having toothpicks hammered under your fingernails