DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell: General Discussion #2

[johnkimble123]

Dick Stroking Phil Vlogs never seizes to amaze me with their autistic, hyperfocused attention to DSPs retarded antics. Love it.

You can just about do a top 10 of non-gaming related quits:

Mike Clum documentary - too much work
Co-op with wife - not enough money, she hates him
Co-op with Brian - not enough money, he hates him
Staying out of drama - $$ over morals
Bowing out of drama - too much work despite the $$
Interviews with Lolcows - too much work
Interviews with non-Lolcows - too much work
(technically) Interview with Craig was a rage quit - ego
DSPReacts - not enough money, too much work
DSPThrowback - despite zero effort for him, not enough money to do streams, barely talked about
DSPolitics (knew it was coming but didn't officially get killed until 2025) - not enough money, too much work
Glasses/Hat/Vest gimmicks - too cool for this
Throne - nobody cared, he didn't care, and it was only for Jasper kitty
Merch - never even talks about it, nobody cares, if people were buying he'd mention it

 

[QwahlityKahntent]

Because the amount of money blown on the game directly contradicts his bankruptcy filings, aka Phil committed perjury. Admitting to it all means the IRS is looking for bacon.

unless someone actually submitted well laid out and properly researched evidence how he scammed his bankruptcy, i cant see them caring
but by this point im sure theyve gotten hundreds of retarded emails from dentractors being like "HURR DURR PHIL IS SCAMMER LIAR" so they'll just ignore anything else

 

[Kier Starmer]

He has barely completed any games the last year and if so they were so drawn out they took months the exception in this was Shadow of the Erd Tree which we know fully he cheesed and was looking at guides. A lot of the TIHYDP people have pretty much left the space entirely because his streams are so painful to endure. I am curious of what happens when the detractorverse eventually shrinks and what it will do for him. I think a lot of the whales will give out because there is no us vs them anymore. The issue is too for Phil a lot of his whales are going with ebbs and flows now which suggests a financial threshold is being hit and with the only KC whale Perry the White being around and him repeatedly expressing financial issues and fatigue, 2025 is already on a rocky start.

 

[Big Brown Schlub]

Wasn't there a time when Phil actually did complete the majority of the games that he played, no matter how much he struggled with them?

I remember even back during the AlphaOmegaSin days, by which I mean AOS calling him a ragequitter and DSP sperging out over it, he still completed the majority of games he played. I don't remember who went through last year's walkthroughs of his I think it might've been An1337, but he discovered that Phail didn't even complete half the games he played. And that's with games like Tekken 8 not even being considered because you can't really "complete" it since it's a competitive multiplayer game (and before anyone mentions it, NOBODY gives a shit about Harada's garbage "Daddy Issues: The Game" singleplayer story mode)

He has barely completed any games the last year and if so they were so drawn out they took months

To give my own experience, I didn't quite realize at how glacial of a pace he's completing games now until I played the Yakuza Gaiden game "alongside" him. I put alongside in quotes because pretty much every other khantent creator who played it on release already completed it by the time I started playing. According to Steam stats, I played it for 31 hours, I started playing on Dec 10 2023, a full month and 2 days after the game released, and 100% it on Dec 23. Phail not only didn't do a completionist run of the game (he tried to but he sucks at the Yakuza games so he couldn't beat the Coliseum side content) he's only beaten the game on Jan 3 2024. He took almost 2 months to beat a game that only takes 30 hours to do a completionist's run of.

 

[Elite Kipchak]

I am curious of what happens when the detractorverse eventually shrinks and what it will do for him.

neither exists without the other. i honestly think the endgame for the detractorverse is all the smaller channels dying and all their viewers funneling into one or two bigger detractor channels, and those detractors just troll tip phil to continue milking him for content.

 

[LilypaCastsUpper]

neither exists without the other. i honestly think the endgame for the detractorverse is all the smaller channels dying and all their viewers funneling into one or two bigger detractor channels, and those detractors just troll tip phil to continue milking him for content.

Theoretically I agree but think of the toxic vortex mental-pressure on the McDetractor Lobbyist Duopoly restreamers. That's a lot of autism to juggle. That's enough to drive a man to the bottom of a bottle and then some. I feel like restreaming DSP consistently is harder than it looks and that would be upping the ante, is all I'm saying.

 

[Digger10]

You can just about do a top 10 of non-gaming related quits:

Mike Clum documentary - too much work
Co-op with wife - not enough money, she hates him
Co-op with Brian - not enough money, he hates him
Staying out of drama - $$ over morals
Bowing out of drama - too much work despite the $$
Interviews with Lolcows - too much work
Interviews with non-Lolcows - too much work
(technically) Interview with Craig was a rage quit - ego
DSPReacts - not enough money, too much work
DSPThrowback - despite zero effort for him, not enough money to do streams, barely talked about
DSPolitics (knew it was coming but didn't officially get killed until 2025) - not enough money, too much work
Glasses/Hat/Vest gimmicks - too cool for this
Throne - nobody cared, he didn't care, and it was only for Jasper kitty
Merch - never even talks about it, nobody cares, if people were buying he'd mention it

Far be it for me to correct mockery of Phil, but him quitting the interviews was less because it was too much work and more because he could only find three people to take him up on it. He really didn't have a choice.

 

[Jang Joo]

What Phil constantly stops to discern and taste when having his slop on-camera is the spit of the poor bum that gets stuck delivering his DoorDash orders every time, because Phil never tips and always reprimands him and gives him low reviews (online only)

 

[Lord_Point]

unless someone actually submitted well laid out and properly researched evidence how he scammed his bankruptcy, i cant see them caring
but by this point im sure theyve gotten hundreds of retarded emails from dentractors being like "HURR DURR PHIL IS SCAMMER LIAR" so they'll just ignore anything else

People get so spergy about the bankruptcy. The government doesnt care, they dont research this shit. Excluding people who get fucked by medical shit or whatever, declaring bankruptcy is just a public announcement that you are a loser who cant be treated like an adult. The goverment is just there to make it public record that you are indeed, a useless drain on society.

The gov doesnt care if you dont pay back a bunch of credit card companies. Its why personal bankrupcy is granted in 99% of cases where its filed. They are rubber stamping it. DSP didnt pull one over on ol' Nancy nor was it proof he was a hanest business man. He just showed up, said im a fat turd, and Nancy said sure, granted.

He has barely completed any games the last year and if so they were so drawn out they took months the exception in this was Shadow of the Erd Tree which we know fully he cheesed and was looking at guides.

It always amazes me that I, like phil, am a mahture ahdult with a family (actual family with more then 2 fat adults) and a full time job (not playing games) and I feel like i play the same if not more games then he does.

 

[dent_whisperer]

by this point im sure theyve gotten hundreds of retarded emails from dentractors being like "HURR DURR PHIL IS SCAMMER LIAR" so they'll just ignore anything else

Same exact reason Youtube does nothing to him. Retards have sperged out over the tiniest of infractions so hard that Phil's channel has built up an immunity of sorts and it will take a report of something like murder, drug/weapons/human trafficking, rape or some other highly illegal thing to not instantly get ignored.

 

[Jose Cuervo]

Phil claiming Journey to the West (which he obviously never read) is “ingrained in Japanese culture” was one of the most hilarious things he said in ages.

In his mind, Asians are all chicky chang wangs, after all.

 

[Keith the Horse Fucker]

Phil claiming Journey to the West (which he obviously never read) is “ingrained in Japanese culture” was one of the most hilarious things he said in ages.

In his mind, Asians are all chicky chang wangs, after all.

Based

 

[Down From The Champions]

Has DSP ever played a Dynasty Warriors game? The new one that came out just now is pretty good and it would be amusing watching him get his shit pushed in while not being able to parse any of the names.

Full of racism jokes

 

[dent_whisperer]

Phil claiming Journey to the West (which he obviously never read) is “ingrained in Japanese culture” was one of the most hilarious things he said in ages.

In his mind, Asians are all chicky chang wangs, after all.

Lets just hope he never discovers India. Phil would be in absolute heaven watching dudes drop their pants to take shits on the side of the road in full view of everyone.

 

[TheGreatWhiteNorth]

I have questions. Namely, will this take up the entire stream, and how many people will he ban for trying to help him?

 

[Dr Pavel I'm CIA]

I have questions. Namely, will this take up the entire stream, and how many people will he ban for trying to help him?
View attachment 6875480

It baffles me how he's incapable of solving anything on his own...

But I guess that's normal when you've been handheld with almost anything for the last decade

His inability to google anything is just puzzling, with one search I was able to find a workaround and a solution... (I won't share it here cause of the flying monkeys)

I guess he stopped reading solutions cause "[lean in to read chat message with the solution] it's for windows 10 guys, it won't work on my windows 11 [assertive snort] [mic bump to show dominance over the paypiggies]"

 

[Kier Starmer]

nigger is technically an employee of Google, nigger never uses Google. Also oh no I can't see your tits Phil I am so sad now. Get over yourself you faggot, it is honestly like reading posts from a 16 year old valley girl or a homosexual.

 

[TheGreatWhiteNorth]

nigger is technically an employee of Google, nigger never uses Google. Also oh no I can't see your tits Phil I am so sad now. Get over yourself you faggot, it is honestly like reading posts from a 16 year old valley girl or a homosexual.

Likening Phil's intelligence to a 16-year-old valley girl is being kind to Phil, and insulting to valley girls.

 

[Vic Viper T301]

I have questions. Namely, will this take up the entire stream, and how many people will he ban for trying to help him?
View attachment 6875480

I updated my Windows last night and this morning it was suddenly saying that Windows is not activated. I had to crawl on my hands and knees under my desk with a flashlight and write down the product key, reactivated no problem but still a pain my my ass. I hope this happens to Phil too, we will get an hours long freakout about it and he will complain about it until the heat death of the universe. Maybe get a story of him talking to a support chat bot or yelling at a pajeet.

 

[Elbe]

I have questions. Namely, will this take up the entire stream, and how many people will he ban for trying to help him?
View attachment 6875480

Daddy needs a new webcam, dents. Step the fuck up.