StyxHexenhammer666 / Tarl Warwick - Oddball Occultist Neckbeard (who can make some interesting content)

Laylithe said:
Hell hath no fury like women scorned.
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Why would I feel scorned by a man who has no sense of integrity? That's like being upset over trash taking itself out. Maybe he forgets how good it feels knowing you're right about a person being a sad sorry sack of shit, that it totally negates the typical anger that comes with knowing they were lying the whole time. As long as Sarah knows his tongue was literally inside of my asshole, and he doesn't brush his teeth every day or bathe for days on end, that's enough to keep a smile on my face about it all. Enjoy the poopy kisses <3
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@Laylithe Nobody in here is going to say this but I will. I respect you for coming in here and replying to comments and being in the crossfire. Not everyone has the balls to do that. But you do, and you're still in here making jokes n shit. Love it.
 
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Chaotic Pizzaparty said:
OK first off the pirate hate is giving me very DSP vibes with the cowboy hat and is equally retarded.
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I think Tarl outdid Phil by a full order of magnitude. At least cowboy hats belong in the 21st century. Phil might not have been Dwight Yoakam, but nobody in the 21st century is Thomas Jefferson.
 
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an_actual_reptilian said:
HE CANT JUST STEAL KING COBRA THE SEXY GOTH BAD BOY HAT! HES A FASHION ICON!

This is just too far!!!

Thanks for the snow Styx!!! We all loved it down here! Got a few days off of work and hung out with the family doin snow stuff!!!
Appreciate it bud!!!
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I predict an incomming chaos magick warlock war between Styx and Cobra
 
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Outer Space Traveller said:
Guys, why is he dressed like a pirate? And why does he have a portrait of Stool's Ass? One thing is to have a plush, the other is to have a portrait - like a direct tribute to the character, all drawn specifically to honour him. Weird...
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I'm going to do something dangerous. Try to empathize with Tarl and understand his actions.

...I am Tarl. I am a faggot. No one likes me because I'm an anti-social retard... I only know how to posture online... I believe that I am an expert in MEME MAGIC...

My audience has begun calling me retarded because I killed a prosecutor related to my domestic violence case with MEME MAGIC... My audience has accused me of going off the deep end because I summoned a snowstorm in the Deep South to punish my enemies in Louisiana using MEME MAGIC...

I have not gone off the deep end... I know because I was crazy when I overdosed on Chinese Retard Spice... I was crazy again when I let my alcoholism take over my life again and I decided fucking the manifestation of a BPD ticking time bomb was a good idea and squeezed her boobs on stream... But I'm not crazy now. I'm better, I'm off the sauce.

What should I do? What do I need? To stay in my house where it's safe. But I need money. So, I will use MEME MAGIC to influence my audience so they will continue to pay me money.

What memetic focuses will I need for this task? The power of the founding fathers, to connect with my audience on an ideological level, a Tricorn Hat. The power of the Deep South, to connect with my audience on a historical level, a Calvary Sword. A catalyst for my MEME MAGIC, something I connect with emotionally, Halloween, spooky month, the only time I feel normal, a Pumpkin.

Finally, the source of my power... the source of my MEME MAGIC, the deal I made with the shadow on my wall when I was young, a representation of STOLAS.

Okay, I'm done. I feel like a faggot, that was awful. Now. When what I've described doesn't work because the demon that Tarl thinks is a faggot owl is too busy or has decided it's done all the damage it needs to, Tarl is going to start blood letting. He's going to look for a celestial event and tie his attempts at controlling his reality to it. Masturbation will likely be involved both metaphorically and literally.

Prediction: Tarl is going to leak a sex tape. It may be released by an opposing party, but in his heart of hearts Tarl will believe his actions are what caused the tape to be released. Tarl will use this tape as a rallying cry to claim he is being persecuted by a spiteful ex which he believes will help build his brand beyond the stagnation he's dealt with up until this point in his career.

It will backfire spectacularly and it will be very very funny.
 
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Catgirl Tyranid said:
Prediction: Tarl is going to leak a sex tape. It may be released by an opposing party, but in his heart of hearts Tarl will believe his actions are what caused the tape to be released. Tarl will use this tape as a rallying cry to claim he is being persecuted by a spiteful ex which he believes will help build his brand beyond the stagnation he's dealt with up until this point in his career.
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Never once had I considered that the activities could have been filmed nor have I ever envisioned him actually doing the deed until reading that. True nightmare fuel.
 
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DO NOT REDEEM SAAAAR!
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He's got a surprising like to dislike ratio (if it's to be believed via the Firefox addon I have); I figured it'd be lower with this take.
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Laylithe said:
It was nice having meals paid for and rent taken care of. These next few months are gonna be interesting.
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Was it worth it? Genuinely was it worth it? This is not distinctly different than the world's oldest profession and your business was broadcast worldwide to the point that even I'm commenting on it from my office. Wouldn't it have been worth using a stove a few times and shelling out a few K to avoid this awkward situation that we're in now?
 
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Catgirl Tyranid said:
Did you intend on marrying Tarl?
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I don't think Tarl intended on doing anything with me except try to humiliate me, based off of his actions. What's so mind boggling is how badly he seemed to want to be around for me and my kids... despite being fully capable of just NOT leading me into thinking he wanted to have a monogamous relationship. He could've just chosen to help me out of kindness or left me alone but he's telling people he's in love with me? In love with me but eating out Sarah's pussy without sharing, lying and hiding it? Rude. He could've stayed with his wife, stayed single and left me alone, or just been honest with me but noooo. What a troll. I can't even harass with revenge porn because all of it looks I'm sleeping with a homeless dude, it's sad. I guess it's what I get....being cheated and lied to isn't something i tolerate well I'm so sorry "daddy". (I think i broke my eyes rolling them)
 
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Rick Nekieta said:
Was it worth it? Genuinely was it worth it? This is not distinctly different than the world's oldest profession and your business was broadcast worldwide to the point that even I'm commenting on it from my office. Wouldn't it have been worth using a stove a few times and shelling out a few K to avoid this awkward situation that we're in now?
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I am half convinced that these women were really bound by black magic. The rational side of my brain however says that Wizard Pirate Lord Tarl of Warwick is just a magnet for neurotic women.

Laylithe said:
In love with me but eating out Sarah's pussy without sharing, lying and hiding it? Rude.
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Okay who tf is this Sarah? Inquiring minds want to know.
Laylithe said:
He could've stayed with his wife, stayed single and left me alone, or just been honest with me but noooo.
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Did him and Liz break up because Tarl just couldn't get enough of that keister?
Laylithe said:
What a troll. I can't even harass with revenge porn because all of it looks I'm sleeping with a homeless dude, it's sad.
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LOL! Tarl bodied.
 
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