Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

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A few comments from Josh in this video:

"Killing people is the fun part" - Josh Saunders.

"You can't trust love as far as you can throw it" - Josh Saunders

"Love is evil backwards with an O" - Josh Saunders

"If I can find a girlfriend and make it last 2 years what's stopping the rest of you miserable fucks?" - Josh Saunders

"Here's my predicament youtube.. Some chicks are creeped out by me and some chicks are so attracted to me that it intimidates them. Some chicks are just intimidated by my good looks." - Josh Saunders

"Being friendzoned is better than no attention to some degree" - Josh Saunders

"Nope, I didn't spend valentines day with anyone.. Not even fun sized felicia (His black loli sex doll) the first thing I did when I got up this morning was put my sex doll back in the box.. I kind of felt like it would be a cliche.. Oh the lonely ass autistic guy fucking his sex doll on valentines day.. It just screamed cliche... it just screamed cliche" - Josh Saunders

"I know I'm a damn good singer but my neighbors don't want to hear me singing this late at night" - Josh Saunders

"Go ahead and do it... No skin off my shoes" - Josh Saunders

"I didn't have the money elliot rodgers had and I've had sex with more girls than he has" - Josh Saunders

"First of all.. She wasn't flirting with customers.. That's fucking stupid.. And second of all sex sells.. so hgmhmmm.. " - Josh Saunders

"Humans are some of the most disgusting creatures to ever exist" - Josh Saunders

"If 95% of her body is trembling.. Sometimes it doesn't happen.. Her legs will shake.. You'll think she has Parkinsons disease in her legs or some shit but trust me if you're doing a good job she doesn't have Parkinsons disease if you catch my drift" - Josh Saunders



A few comments made regarding the video:

He tells his mall earing girl story again... He's in love with this girl. Around 25 minutes in if you've never heard the story.. He's told it like 20 times now. He pierced his ear himself just so he can go see the earing girl again. He keeps his left earing to keep the memory of her alive.

"He spends the first 7 minutes talking about how to treat your lady for Valentines day. Bath bombs, champagne, chocolate rimmed glasses, the whole 9 yards. Then goes into a rant about how much he hates Valentines day."

"His casual mention of Elliot Rogers then the totally non-sequitur statement of how Ted Bundy got caught because he got cocky leads me to believe that perhaps we're going to enter into a new saga....one where Josh begins slicing up more than sex dolls."

"This guy is like stuck in highschool, his assumptions about women are so juvenile... i...i mean he has big muscles and is a sex god"
 
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Achaemenes said:

A few comments from Josh in this video:

"Killing people is the fun part" - Josh Saunders.

"You can't trust love as far as you can throw it" - Josh Saunders

"Love is evil backwards with an O" - Josh Saunders

"If I can find a girlfriend and make it last 2 years what's stopping the rest of you miserable fucks?" - Josh Saunders

"Here's my predicament youtube.. Some chicks are creeped out by me and some chicks are so attracted to me that it intimidates them. Some chicks are just intimidated by my good looks." - Josh Saunders

"Being friendzoned is better than no attention to some degree" - Josh Saunders

"Nope, I didn't spend valentines day with anyone.. Not even fun sized felicia (His black loli sex doll) the first thing I did when I got up this morning was put my sex doll back in the box.. I kind of felt like it would be a cliche.. Oh the lonely ass autistic guy fucking his sex doll on valentines day.. It just screamed cliche... it just screamed cliche" - Josh Saunders

"I know I'm a damn good singer but my neighbors don't want to hear me singing this late at night" - Josh Saunders

"Go ahead and do it... No skin off my shoes" - Josh Saunders

"I didn't have the money elliot rodgers had and I've had sex with more girls than he has" - Josh Saunders

"First of all.. She wasn't flirting with customers.. That's fucking stupid.. And second of all sex sells.. so hgmhmmm.. " - Josh Saunders

"Humans are some of the most disgusting creatures to ever exist" - Josh Saunders

"If 95% of her body is trembling.. Sometimes it doesn't happen.. Her legs will shake.. You'll think she has Parkinsons disease in her legs or some shit but trust me if you're doing a good job she doesn't have Parkinsons disease if you catch my drift" - Josh Saunders



A few comments made regarding the video:

He tells his mall earing girl story again... He's in love with this girl. Around 25 minutes in if you've never heard the story.. He's told it like 20 times now. He pierced his ear himself just so he can go see the earing girl again. He keeps his left earing to keep the memory of her alive.

"He spends the first 7 minutes talking about how to treat your lady for Valentines day. Bath bombs, champagne, chocolate rimmed glasses, the whole 9 yards. Then goes into a rant about how much he hates Valentines day."

"His casual mention of Elliot Rogers then the totally non-sequitur statement of how Ted Bundy got caught because he got cocky leads me to believe that perhaps we're going to enter into a new saga....one where Josh begins slicing up more than sex dolls."

"This guy is like stuck in highschool, his assumptions about women are so juvenile... i...i mean he has big muscles and is a sex god"
Click to expand...

I feel like shit is about to get pretty dark. But, hey, it's Valentine's Day. Every tryhard 3dg3l0rd always bemoans their situation on that day.
 
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Broseph Stalin said:
I feel like shit is about to get pretty dark. But, hey, it's Valentine's Day. Every tryhard 3dg3l0rd always bemoans their situation on that day.
Click to expand...

He's talked about suicide before.. Do you remember when he held his sword to his stomach as if he was going to perform a seppoku suicide then bitched out and dropped the sword... Almost cutting off his toes? He's talked about elliot rodgers a few times now but he's really been into Ted Bundy lately and talking about how killing would be the fun part he just doesn't want to get caught..

If it get's dark.. I hope he keeps making youtube videos.
 
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I know I usually try to be informative regarding Josh and his videos.. Give everyone a little insight... Let people in on some of the backstory that haven't been watching him for fucking years.. But there just isn't much more I can add to this video.. I'll let it speak for itself.

Re-upload
 
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Achaemenes said:
I know I usually try to be informative regarding Josh and his videos.. Give everyone a little insight... Let people in on some of the backstory that haven't been watching him for fucking years.. But there just isn't much more I can add to this video.. I'll let it speak for itself.

Click to expand...

Wasn't sure if troll vid at first until I opened it on YouTube. Either this was accidental, or Josh's autismu is evolving.
 
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I can't believe it took me this long to find about Cobra here. If fundies found about Josh, he would be the perfect posterboy of the danger of metal and rock music of not just leading to a life of Satan and drugs but for sex dolls and not holding a job at Wendy's.
 
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Alright, so, someone outside of the U.S. needs to make a mirror of this video so we can all watch it. Yet, at the same time, I don't want Josh to ruin Ozzy or Hammerfall for me. :(

 
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Achaemenes said:
There's a video of him beating the shit out of the vice grip with the bat because he walked by it and accidentally bumped into it.

So if by using it you mean beating the shit out of it with a bat... Yes.
Click to expand...

I was kinda hoping there would be a lulzy video of him trying to do DYI repairs or build something from scratch, but I guess that counts too lol.
 
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https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLZ7WagPGoOMsMdCq6-idGnjMJ1fuqY4fM

Well here is the archive being built.

And here's someone making the best out of an opportunity that Josh presented. After he got rid of all of his videos he now has someone with an alt account who has Josh's song posted BEFORE Josh himself now and he's claiming to be the real Kingcobrajfs. LiquidJosh..?

Not necessarily original but still funny imo. Respect to the original liquidautist.


Joshs response so far.

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It's funny Josh complained about this guy stealing and re-uploading his song when in reality it's not even Joshs voice. It's the liquid Josh singing, playing guitar, drums, and auto tuning and Josh takes credit for it saying it's all him.


This is the song. Clearly not Josh.. Only the lyrics are stolen.


Also, a new video from kingkobrajfs.. For those not familiar this is almost an exact replica of Josh's (kingcobrajfs) intro video to new viewers on his page. I'm sure kingcobrajfs was very proud of it.


And here we go.

 
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Broseph Stalin said:
I just hope this guy does it right. Liquid Lolcows can either be good, mediocre, or flat out fucking cancerous (I.e. Liquid Jace from Deagle Nation)
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Yeah I agree completely, hopefully if this saga continues it wont have that cancerous nature, especially like Liquid Jace.
 
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FiddyMen said:
Yeah I agree completely, hopefully if this saga continues it wont have that cancerous nature, especially like Liquid Jace.
Click to expand...

This guy seems to have what it takes to make it work.. If it fails I don't think it'll be his fault but Josh's himself. The liquid king is good, Josh's responses... Well we'll see..

With kingcobra not being as popular as the others I think if he can make it work by hitting the subtle things that kingcobra does and says. The hardcore fans will catch it all.

New shitty vocal cover video.

Also forgot to post this one.. He has absolutely no idea what irony means and he's walking around town in the middle of the night rambling like a homeless schizophrenic about the number 4 and how he used his magical powers to help his high school crush win a bikini photo contest.
 
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