Jason Thor Hall / PirateSoftware / Maldavius Figtree / DarkSphere Creations / Maldavius / Thorwich / Witness X / @PotatoSec - Incompetent Furry Programmer, Blizzard Nepo Baby, Lies about almost every thing in his life, Industry Shill, Carried by his father, Hate boner against Ross Scott of Accursed Farms, False Flagger

[hand holding faggot]

You’ll have to express that as a switch statement for Maldy to comprehend it.

Spoiler: switch statement

switch (age) { case 0: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 1: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 2: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 3: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 4: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 5: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 6: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 7: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 8: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 9: legally_fuckable = false; //unless you're mohammed pbuh break; case 10: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 11: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 12: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 13: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 14: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 15: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 16: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 17: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 18: legally_fuckable = true; break; default: legally_fuckable = true; }

Is this in ferret years?

 

[U+200B]

Twitch doesn't pay the same price on IVS as everyone else.

All IVS tech is based on twitch https://aws.amazon.com/pt/blogs/med...ive-streaming-network-that-powers-amazon-ivs/

In no reality a person/company would "leave" their all their tech behind just to use their tech through someone else at 10x the price.

Twitch may say that to please consumers or people using IVS but in reality I really doubt that they use. This is the same of Spotify saying that they don't make profit, Google saying that youtube isn't profitable and more. This is just BS and people eats it

Claim you lose money on streaming

IIRC they do "pay" the same price. The whole Twitch is running at a loss is self inflicted though, since one hand they still get all the money Twitch "pays" to AWS and on the other they can write off the losses that Twitch makes.
But yes! Even as a random guy I would start to get "discounts" on those ~$0.13 pretty quickly with a stream that size. And massive companies like a Twitch could haggle to near 0% profit margin, since even at 0.1% it would still be millions per month.

For me it was a video on a steam game that he worked on called Champions of Breakfast, boasting that he "Smartly implemented anti piracy" by using the steam achievements as the "Saves" so if you ever had to stop on a pirated copy you would never save. This was somehow innovative and clever but to me it just reeked of an inability to make a proper save, and also just made me think: "What about other platforms?"

I remember that one. Such bullshit from him, acting like there isn't software that can easily fake steam achievements. And also lovely idea to make progress non reset able not like people like to play games more than once.

Well apparently, you don't get it on other platforms including itch.io which prides itself in anti drm features. Instead you buy a steam key.

Oh wow, didn't know about this. This is actually scummy and goes against what itch stands for entirely. I know all the other bits are juicier, but this is just as scummy as some of his other antics.

Also this is the first thing I found when looking up "champions of breakfast itch.io":

"no i think it might be because heartbound is the main project" how is that even remotely an acceptable answer? This page should be reported, since it's not selling anything and what it would sell, if he'd bother to get more keys, is not how itch is meant to work.
Mald defenders are actually mentally challenged!

 

[The Tall Man]

You’ll have to express that as a switch statement for Maldy to comprehend it.

Spoiler: switch statement

switch (age) { case 0: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 1: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 2: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 3: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 4: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 5: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 6: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 7: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 8: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 9: legally_fuckable = false; //unless you're mohammed pbuh break; case 10: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 11: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 12: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 13: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 14: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 15: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 16: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 17: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 18: legally_fuckable = true; break; default: legally_fuckable = true; }

Mald can always convert to Judaism then below 3 years of age become the legally fuckable age limit.

 

[Trigger Me Timbers]

So I was thinking about Jason and...

= ?
Am I the only one? I think Jason has the same weird personality as Elizabeth Holms, the founder of Thanos or whatever that was literally Heartbound a scam and she got jailed for it.


Think about it;

• Artificially deepens voice to sound autorotative and to hide the fact they don't know shit.
• Lies non-stop about personal achievements
• Nepo baby from birth
• Life's work is a nebulous product that will never come to market
• Wears black whenever in public
• Reacts poorly to criticism
• Looks like a woman

Do I need to go on?

 

[Nathan Higgers]

You’ll have to express that as a switch statement for Maldy to comprehend it.

Spoiler: switch statement

switch (age) { case 0: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 1: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 2: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 3: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 4: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 5: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 6: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 7: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 8: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 9: legally_fuckable = false; //unless you're mohammed pbuh break; case 10: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 11: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 12: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 13: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 14: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 15: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 16: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 17: legally_fuckable = false; break; case 18: legally_fuckable = true; break; default: legally_fuckable = true; }

Remove those break statements and you've got yourself a code Mald would write, and a result Mald would abide by.

 

[Frightened Rabbit]

I remember that one. Such bullshit from him, acting like there isn't software that can easily fake steam achievements. And also lovely idea to make progress non reset able not like people like to play games more than once.

It was annoying trying to find a pirated copy of the game, because no one hosts files for this slop, however, once you get your hands on it it's simple to crack it open!
Remember that Maldy here always uses GameMaker Engine, which has been thoroughly decompiled and research by the undertale community, use the undertalemodtool and you too can witness the gift of Maldy-Arrays!
What I found is that his claims are, for the most part, true! This is an insane achivement since maldy made the same claims for Heartbound before being shitslapped, but from what I can see:
For Context passive means a power up, and button_runners means the characters, sprites have subimages, he gets the number of images in a single sprite

Also if you're wondering if this also includes language fuckery like Heartbound, it does!

And just to end on a bang, he keeps all of the stats for the enemies, character and bosses, in arrays!

Overall, this doesn't matter much, since Champions of Breakfast is a small SHMUP where there's little dialogue and enemies are repeated if you see this as a first attempt at making a game from Mald, you'd even be optimistic, however, this is what he makes after coming in hot from his work at Blizzard and that Haxxor Subcontractor, 10 years of experience, indistinguishable from what he writes now, and horrifying! I'll be uploading the scripts I found relevant, you can open them with notepad.

 

[Retardo Da Lynchi]

Long ass post coming in, but I dusted off the ol' account and took a look at the avatars Mald and Wingless made together. Dated around 2007, I still had them. Looking at the properties, it seems like I acquired them in 2016, can't remember who I got them from though.
Shoving all this shit under a spoiler since its going to be quite long:

Spoiler: Furry Avatar Bullshit

Here's a look of what it contains:

Taking a look at the blue wolf first:

Worn right out of the box, its nothing special, its so dated and shit looking that I doubt anyone would even want to use these anymore, sculpties aren't something anyone uses in Second Life anymore, its all mesh model based now. Sculpts used to be the old way in Second Life to create avatars, by using multiple shapes to create something, kinda like play-dough. There's no LOD on sculpts, and avatars could be made of hundreds of little sculpts to create something. Sculpts could be given physics which was commonly called flexi sculpts or flexi prims, Furries used to use this to create floppy tails that would move.
All of this shit is severely outdated and is no longer used.
At first glance, there's not really much here, just basic furry shit from 2007.

The models are basically just fur textures painted onto the SL default body and the paws/head/tail ect are created with sculpties. The avatars themselves didn't come with anything like nipples, dick or any other genitalia, its common in Second Life to buy that shit separately. But as you can see, the only real difference between the male and female is the overall shape of the main body.

Ripping apart the wolf head, quite a few of the scripts inside had been credited and "written" by Maldavius.

Some of them he didn't even bother to name.

Looking through each of the types in this box of avatars, I found that Mald had worked on scripting most of them apart from the Hyena and he was only credited in the boxes of the Wolves and Horses, which have customize HUDs that are supposedly scripted by him. In some of the sculpted models that Maldavius hadn't been credited in there are scripts also by Wingless, but since the permissions on most of them don't allow me to look at said scripts, I cannot see if the scripts are the same.
But the most interesting part is that in every single one of their scripts description, is a time and date of when they had been created, alongside "LSL2 Script"
Back in the day, the LSL Library was an archive of Second Life Scripts that people could freely use inside their projects. There was also other websites hosting user made scripts for others to utilize and use and far larger archives and libraries of user created scripts.

Since a lot of LSL has been lost to the past, and I can't fully read all the scripts in the avatars due to permission issues, we can only really come to three possible theories here:

1. Wingless copied Mald's scripts and continued using them in other avatars without credit.
2. Mald just ripped scripts from the LSL Library and so did Wingless, edited them and then claimed them as his own and locked up perms so people couldn't investigate too deeply.
3. Mald actually writ these scripts. Which I highly doubt given his track record.

Sadly to say, this avatar bullshit isn't all that interesting, although, if they claim that they didn't make NSFW avatars or avatars intended for NSFW, then why is some of the previews on one of their avatars on the online store posed so strangely?

Anyway, even if this was an absolute fucking nothingburger of an investigation, it was not too bad to look into. If anyone else would like these models to look into deeper in and their own time, they can be found here.

I have multiple different versions of this box of avatars all from different sources (not from Wingless's store, but passed around in boxes of stolen/copied shit). But don't know if wasting ones time looking for differences in some almost 20 year old furry avatars is worth my time.

 

[itogi]

So I was thinking about Jason and...

= ?
Am I the only one? I think Jason has the same weird personality as Elizabeth Holms, the founder of Thanos or whatever that was literally Heartbound a scam and she got jailed for it.

No, you're at least person #3 that brought this up

 

[U+200B]

And just to end on a bang, he keeps all of the stats for the enemies, character and bosses, in arrays!

I thought this when seeing the HB code, but it's the same here. Has he ever looked at the docs? I never used game maker, but I saw that they have structs (work similar to objects) which would at least make more sense than 2D arrays!
At least with Structs he shouldn't walk into errors where he types the wrong number. E.g. arr[15][88] instead of arr[14][88] and straight up get's a wrong value.

This was the INSANE BEHAVIOR that some of my more retarded classmates would pull off during their first week of learning to code.

 

[my penis is on fire]

At this point I need more than a shitty MSPaint Pie chart.

The chart is based on Mald's and Shaye's claims, which I don't have any independent way to source. However, I do have this:

Of the ferrets where Mald publicly talked about where they came from, 47% are healthy. For the ones where he never said where he got them, 73% are healthy. What this tells me is that he may be "rescuing" healthy ferrets from less-than-legitimate sources, then choosing not to mention where he got them to maintain his credibility.
I may or may not have a spreadsheet keeping track of the ferrets now. What has my life come to

 

[U+200B]

Forgot to add this. But this is the PNG you get from CoB on itch:


Once again. Why make a simple top to bottom list when you can make some weird diagram.

 

[Ducks Sorted in a Row]

Forgot to add this. But this is the PNG you get from CoB on itch:
View attachment 6981327

Once again. Why make a simple top to bottom list when you can make some weird diagram.

I'm guessing when he pressed "New" in mspaint (professional gamedev tool) he set the canvas to a certain size and didn't want to resize it and move things around after doing the first arrow because doing that in paint is a pain in the ass.

 

[ChromaQuack]

I thought this when seeing the HB code, but it's the same here. Has he ever looked at the docs? I never used game maker, but I saw that they have structs (work similar to objects) which would at least make more sense than 2D arrays!
At least with Structs he shouldn't walk into errors where he types the wrong number. E.g. arr[15][88] instead of arr[14][88] and straight up get's a wrong value.

This was the INSANE BEHAVIOR that some of my more retarded classmates would pull off during their first week of learning to code.

What's more strange to me (a retard who could not even code a hello world) is that him, being a supergenius hacker would look at these monstrous 600+ line arrays and never, not once did he stop and ask himself "surely there has to be a more efficient way of doing this, right?".
Say for example: seeing the array of enemy and player stats, would it not be easier to define stats for a generic "enemy" and "player", then multiply those depending on what you need?

I feel this is what makes Malding Fagtree such a great cow, all you need is a modicum of common sense to see why he's a hack.

 

[Dead Lion]

What's more strange to me (a retard who could not even code a hello world) is that him, being a supergenius hacker would look at these monstrous 600+ line arrays and never, not once did he stop and ask himself "surely there has to be a more efficient way of doing this, right?"

This is the wonder of Malding Fagtree, all you need is a modicum of common sense to see why he's a hack.

Better yet he knows very well that what he’s doing is very dumb because he cites Undertale on his website (A) as an example of bad programming not being required to make a game. There’s a short where he reiterates the claim as well.

The kick is that this kind of coding is exactly what undertale does, but Toby doesn’t pretend to be a god among programmers.

 

[U+200B]

didn't want to resize it and move things around after doing the first arrow because doing that in paint is a pain in the ass.

Or he legit doesn't know that you can have different sizes. In his paint videos he always seems to open a default size and then zooms in and out.

surely there has to be a more efficient way of doing this, right?

The only explanation I could think of is him doing some kinda 20D-Chess where more lines = more impressive code. (Usually wannabe geniuses in coding try to use as little lines as possible, which causes unreadable code).

 

[hand holding faggot]

What's more strange to me (a retard who could not even code a hello world) is that him, being a supergenius hacker would look at these monstrous 600+ line arrays and never, not once did he stop and ask himself "surely there has to be a more efficient way of doing this, right?".

Usually this kind of code is a result of laziness. Like you store a little bit of data in an array because it's faster to implement here and now (for some reason), and then again, and again, and now you have the whole program based on that, so now you can either rewrite the whole thing, or you can keep doing what you've been doing all along.
But Jason has a little problem: he did it 2 times in separate games. He's never seen any problem to begin with. This is a normal solution in his eyes.

 

[Shuhalo]

I may or may not have a spreadsheet keeping track of the ferrets now. What has my life come to

God bless you, you beautiful autist. I've sincerely enjoyed the way you've been breaking down the Ferret info via diagrams, its very appreciated.

Maybe drop a link sometime in the future, in case it ever comes to him trying to retcon the fates of the Ferrets.

 

[fukkit]

As much as he talks about the rescue, is he ever seen on the stream? I tried to search the clips but it seems only the pooner slaves do any work

 

[MercuryMan]

As much as he talks about the rescue, is he ever seen on the stream? I tried to search the clips but it seems only the pooner slaves do any work

Shaye is left to take care of 40+ ferrets while Mald plays vidya or gives the ferrets a "friendly" visit.

 

[jDBHXsmSf]

When this supposed drama went down, the avatars got copybotted/given out for free many years ago.

I'm pretty sure I have I have a copy of said models on my second life account. I never bought them, but it was in an archive of other stolen/copied/griefing shit that got passed around in the past.
I can go blow off the dust of my account and take a look at the models.

This would be great!! Hopefully we can find something good.